Be Lonely With You

BY: Keiko Hidaka

Disclaimer: I only wish they were mine...

Go ahead and read my story... I think its my best work yet. And hey! If you like this pleeeeeease go read my other ones! Oh yeah, this is Yohji/Aya Aya/Yohji... you decide. ^_^

I love you.

The words were empty, and meaningless as forgotten dreams. The need to find the meaning of the treasured phrase winded through his mind. Creating daydreams of finding the compassion he desired. He wanted to see amorous eyes gazing back into his with tender sweetness. He wanted to feel another's skin sliding over his own. He wanted to hear another's heartbeat.

But love brings pain. He knew the price of capturing another's heart made one vulnerable and weak. It would all be worth the heartbreak, for one second of being wrapped in that warm and fuzzy emotion. Even if your lover turned their back on you, you would still have your memories of bliss, though tainted, it was bliss non-the less, right? To have the innocence of a child, trusting your soul mate with your life.

~*~*~

Yohji took another puff of his cigarette; it was almost down to the butt. He sighed a lonely sigh and watched Aya arrange some obnoxious sunflowers. Aya's white hands moved quickly, wrapping them with plastic wrap, and then tied a big red bow around the flowers that would rival Aya's hair. Yohji's green eyes felt heavy as he took the last drag from his cigarette before tossing it on the clean floor and smashing it with the tip of his leather boot.

Aya looked up from his arrangement and glared at the older man. Usually Yohji would smirk the glare off, or tease Aya just for the sport of it. But Yohji just stared at the floor with black, cloudy eyes. He didn't even seem to notice Aya was there.

Aya cleared his throat. "We've got work to do."

Yohji looked up as Aya thrust a bunch of roses at him that needed to be "de-thorned". The blond sat at a table and began to cut the thorns off, one by one. He kept thinking through the monotonous task and didn't pay attention to his hands. "Shit!" He cursed loudly as he cut his index and middle finger in one long swipe. He dropped the roses and the knife he was holding to the floor and grasped his hands in pain. Aya looked up from the cash register.

Yohji pinched his eyes shut. Even though he was a trained and experienced assassin, who had dealed with gunshots and arrows, he still got queasy from blood. "I cut myself..." he said through gritted teeth. Aya came over and took Yohji's hand in his own and inspected it silently, then left the room before returning with a first-aid kit. Aya's violet gaze turned to yohji's bleeding hand and he dabbed gauze with alcohol on the wound. Yohji tried to stifle a whimper, but it was too late as a small yelp escaped his lips. Yohji bit down on his bottom lip as the red head pinched the cut closed and bandaged it, with surprising tender care.

When he finished, Aya rose and picked up the kit and put it back in a cupboard.

"Thanks." Yohji muttered.

Aya turned and opened his mouth to say something... but his glare softened as he saw Yohji's depressed downcast look. The usual smirk was gone, the sly remarks were nowhere to be seen, and not even the seductive manner was in sight. "What is the matter, Kudou?" He asked, keeping his distance.

Yohji looked up taking his sunglasses off. "Have you ever been in love?"

Aya was startled by the question and searched Yohji's eyes to see if he was joking. But Aya didn't see any humor in the dusty green orbs. The silence crept between them as Yohji waited for Aya's answer. Aya looked away, feeling blush reach his ivory cheeks, "No."

Yohji sighed. "Me neither."

Aya took a double take and gave Yohji a quizzical look. "But-"

"Yeah, I know what it looks like." Yohji cut in before Aya could finish his sentence. "Well let me tell you something. Sleeping with everybody over eighteen in Tokyo doesn't mean you had to love any of them."

Aya's eyes widened. "Everybody?... Your gay?" he said in an astonished voice.

"No, bi." He retorted sliding his sunglasses back on. "I'm looking for someone to stay with forever." Then Yohji smiled coldly. "What are you Aya?"

Normally, Aya wouldn't have answered this kind of question to anyone... but since Yohji had confided a secret with him, it was only fair to share one with the older man as well. "I'm gay."

"I knew it. You're too pretty to be straight." Yohji chuckled.

"Shut up." Aya commanded.

Yohji stopped laughing, but didn't stop smiling. "Sorry, Aya, don't be offended. I meant it as a compliment."

Aya blushed and pulled up a chair closer to Yohji. The older man smiled at the cautious act from the red head. Yohji took a cigarette from his pocket and handed it to Aya. "Smoke?"

"No thanks." Aya replied. Yohji smirked and pressed the cigarette between Aya's smooth lips and lighted it up. Aya coughed and took it out of his mouth. Yohji laughed again. "You're lonely like me, Aya, aren't you?"

Aya took a brave drag of the cigarette. "So?" He said exhaling the smoke.

"Nobody should be lonely."

"I'm and exception."

"Ha. Then I'm going to be lonely with you." He said brushing a crimson eartail from Aya's face.
~*~*~*~

Later that night Aya sat on his bed. He was thinking... about tall, seductive, blond assassins. Maybe this man could be his savior... from the hell his life had turned into. It turned out that he DID have a heart after all; a willing heart that was lonely for love and comfort. Aya silently wondered what kind of love Yohji Kudou would want. Being a virgin himself, Aya's ideas were vague. He took out his katana and began to clean it in the moonlight. So many missions had gone by, him fighting along side of Yohji... yet he never wondered what Yohji was thinking... or feeling. Had Yohji had feelings for him? Did Aya have feelings for him now?

Aya looked at his own reflection in the sword. He knew he had to see Yohji. Something inside was pushing him to see the blond... something deep. Aya quietly pulled his jeans off the floor and put them on. He also donned a baggy and ripped t-shirt. Stealthily, he tiptoed past Omi and Ken's rooms towards Yohji's. He reached the door, feeling his heart pound in anticipation. What should he say? What should he do? His quivering hand tapped on the door softly. He heard feet shuffling in the room and the knob creaked open revealing a sleepy Yohji in nothing but baggy red flannel pajama pants. Aya was overcome with some unknown feeling when he saw the man. He grabbed hold of Yohji's strong bare shoulders, and before Yohji could react... he kissed him.

Since Aya had never kissed anyone before, the kiss was clumsy. But Yohji didn't turn away. He kissed back softly, slowly bringing his arms around Aya's waist. Yohji's warms tongue slipped between Aya's lips and ran over the red head's until both tongues were dancing together. At the same moment they broke away. Aya turned his eyes away from Yohji, ashamed of what he had done.

"Yohji?" He said. "Ca-can you please be alone with me?"

Yohji tipped Aya's chin up and kissed his lips again. "Hmmm... yes." He said going back to savor the sweet kisses.