Don't forget to read the end of chapter 12 if you haven't done so already!



Title: The Journey Home

Chapter 13: Remembered Pain

Rated: R

***

Dr. Price had been laying on his bed staring at the ceiling. He had already investigated
the room and examined the DRD as much as possible. So when the door to his room opened and
he heard John Crichton's voice, he sat up with a huge sigh of relief. The sigh became a
cough of surprise when he saw John's latest companion.

"Hello," he said weakly. 'Please don't let me piss in my pants,' he thought numbly.

Cassandra grinned at him. "Don't worry about D'Argo. He's all bark and no bite." D'Argo
growled at her, and Chiana laughed.

"Right," he said, his voice hadn't changed a bit though.

John grinned. "Well, come on. Time for the intro lesson."

Dr. Price and his DRD followed them to Laurie's quarters. Her shrieks were heard well down
the hall, causing those inside to wonder what torture was being inflicted upon her, and if
they would be next. The reactions of the Humans varied, from Dr. Smith's fainting to Dr.
Mayfield's calm acceptance. Once everyone had recovered from their shock, John led them to
the Terrace.

John waited until their guests had quieted down, their awe lapsing into silence, before
speaking. "Before I begin with your history lesson, there are a few technologies you need
to understand. To begin, translator microbes. I'm sure that everyone on Earth and yourselves
included have been theorizing how we are able to understand each other. The answer is
translator microbes. They colonize at the base of the brain and allow us to understand each
other."

"You have alien microbes in your brain?!" Dr. Mayfield asked stunned.

"Yes. I was injected with them shortly after I arrived," John replied, his voice calm.

"Have we been injected?" Dr. Smith asked horrified.

"Only those who ask for the microbes will be injected," John answered. He did not glance at
his father or his friend.

"Well I don't want them!" Dr. Mayfield shouted impassioned.

"Then you will not receive them," John replied calmly. He glanced at the unsure faces of the
Humans and asked, "Does anyone want to accept them now? The offer will be open as long as you
wish, so don't feel pressured."

"I would like them," Umi said meekly.

"Me, too," Dr. Price added, his voice noticeably stronger though not any less afraid.

Their two DRDs scooted closer to them and injected the microbes. Both let out a sound that
conveyed their surprise. John waited until they looked up at him. "It will begin to work in
a few microts."

Umi nodded and subconsciously rubbed the back of her neck, where she knew the microbes would
colonize. Dr. Price shifted his weight nervously.

"Will you begin telling us what happened..." Laurie's questioned faltered at the end but her
unspoken words were clear. '...to you? What changed you? You are not who you were.' Her
gaze flickered to the pistol strapped at his thigh and the two similar ones on Cassandra.

"Yes." John paused a moment, wondering just how he should phrase it, how he should begin.
With so many years to think about it, he should have had some idea of how to start... "When
I came out of the wormhole," he began haltingly. "I found myself in the middle of a battle."
His voice began to strengthen. "One between the Peacekeepers and a Leviathan transport..."

John talked for arns. He was grateful that Zhaan had thought to bring benches for them all to
sit on, or otherwise they all would have grown tired of the lesson. He would have to remember
to thank her again. D'Argo, Chiana, Cassandra, and John were the only ones standing. Perhaps
the only ones of the group with the endurance and the patience to do so. John spoke of every
event he had experienced, certain details were left out of course, but for the most part, he told
everything. The fact that Moya had been a prison transport was one such detail that was glossed
over. His child on the Royal Planet was not spoken of. His and Aeryn's relationship was hidden
in omitted details. His double was kept secret.

When his voice began to tire, Cassandra took up her story. She told of her imprisonment, and what
she learned of the races captured with her. When it was time for their stories to meet, John
once again took the lead. They began alternating as two different points of each story was told.
Cassandra remained silent about her growing relationship with Crais, and John did not mention his
rise to fatherhood.

When the last joy of discovering the secrets to wormholes was explored, they grew silent. Neither
knew what to expect from the small assembly, and neither particularly wanted to face it. Both were
exhausted emotionally and physically from having to relieve the experiences that so damaged them.

"D'Argo and I will escort you back to your quarters," Chiana said after a microt. Neither of her
friends were ready to hear their guests' response.

The awe of being able to understand an alien was diminished by the dark tales the two astronauts
told. Umi and Dr. Price rose without a word. Jack and DK stood a moment later, to hide that they
had accepted the microbes earlier. Everyone else stood following their example. Chiana and D'Argo
led them to their quarters, no one spoke.

***

Pilot, who had been monitoring the Terrace, sent two messages. The first he sent to Talyn, a message
that said Crais was needed immediately. The second was much easier to deliver. Aeryn was told to
go to the Terrace. She would find her husband there, alone and in much remembered pain. Pilot kept
a close watch over Cassandra as she left the Terrace. He would need to be able to tell Crais where
she was.

***

Aeryn found John standing alone, staring not at the stars, as he normally did, but instead at the
empty benches Zhaan had placed there for the meeting. He didn't look up when she entered, didn't
seem to notice. She walked over to him, placed both hands on his face, and turned his face to meet
her gaze. She could tell he had been talking to Harvey, who no doubt had been making John's pain worse.

"Aeryn?" he whispered brokenly as his eyes focused on her.

"John." Her voice trembled as his pain stirred her emotions.

In an insane universe, two souls once more relived great pain... but for the first time, they let it
go. He had finally confronted his demons. His father knew nearly everything now, and no matter what
his final reaction turned out to be... John had done the right thing.

***

Crais arrived on Moya, expecting a battle. Pilot's message had been simple. He was needed, by whom and
for what could be answered when he got there. So he got there. He stepped from the transport
expecting someone to greet him, be it friend or foe, but there was no one. He drew his pistol.

"That will not be necessary, Captain," Pilot's voice spoke calmly.

"What is happening?" Crais demanded; he did not put away his pistol.

"Cassandra needs you," Pilot said simply.

Crais instantly holstered his pistol. "Where is she?"

"She's in Maintenance Bay 6; the Farscape is in need of some minor repairs," Pilot answered, knowing
Crais would wonder why the Farscape was there instead of in it's usual spot in Docking Bay 1 with
Aeryn's Prowler.

Crais found Cassandra staring at her brother's module. The Farscape had certainly seen better days.
Her shape remained the same but her hull was a patchwork of different metals. John had managed to
adapt a shield and weapons to the small craft; she was an odd assortment of technologies. Perhaps
the Farscape was Crichton's more visible self.

Cassandra turned at his entrance. "Bialar... what are you doing here?" she asked, quickly brushing
aside her tears.

"What happened?"

"We... John and I... we told them. We told them everything." She burst into tears again. Harsh,
painful sobs racked her body, and Crais pulled her into his embrace, desperately trying to comfort
the woman he loved. Her sobs softened, though the tears continued. "When I was with the K'lar'in,
I thought that no one could ever feel the pain I felt. No one could experience the depth of
humiliation and shame that I had. No one could be so paralyzed with terror." Cassandra shook
her head. "But I was wrong. I couldn't even stay with him afterwards. I left him alone, too
afraid that once I started crying, I'd never stop." Cassandra's tear filled eyes looked up, pleading
with him. "How did he do it? How did he survive?"

Crais was shocked into silence. Cassandra was not mourning for her lost innocence, she was mourning
Crichton's. Crais gathered his thoughts, forming his reply carefully. "He had Aeryn. With her, he
will always survive. He will never be lost."

Her eyes accepted his statement, and she buried her face in his chest. Her tears, for the moment,
quiet. 'But what about me?' she asked silently. 'What do I have?'

***

TBC

WELL... what do ya think? Please review or send me an e-mail!

sorry about the wait, but classes started back on the 2nd and things have been a little crazy...
can you believe! they started us back on the 2nd for cripes sakes! sheesh! anyway, thanks to the
peps reviewing and the ones sending e-mails, I am enjoying both enormously

~Artemis Luna Diana~