Rating

Rating: R

Disclaimer: ..............

A/N: Wow...so you all know I switched to this fandom a little while ago, I used to write primarily Dark Angel stuff...and I just recently gained a whole new appreciation for you all. So, I'd like to take a moment to really say thank you to all of you!!

"Would you believe me if I said I'm tired of this?" - Lifehouse

Chapter 10: Affirmation

Quistis walked down the long, residence hallway with no particular destination in mind. Having little to do most of the day was making her antsy. The confrontation she'd had with a few less than forthcoming army officers had been a notable pick up, and she was in a relatively good mood. The men's sheer unwillingness to comment on the rumors only fueled her fast forming conviction that the army was, indeed, planning something.

As she walked out into the evening sun, she became suddenly aware of a number of eyes on her. It was eerily reminiscent of Garden, only the looks she was presently receiving were much more loaded than any she'd ever gotten from an underclassman.

Feeling good...feeling strong...she made her way across the base. It was nice to feel as if her mission was coming to a successful resolution. Even though she didn't have solid confirmation of the rumors, she'd come to the decision that it was better to be prepared than caught by surprise. Knowing that Galbadia probably would attack would be good enough, and they would depart for Timber and Dollet soon.

Quistis clasped her hands in front of her and hummed lightly under her breath. Her mind trailed back to the kiss that Seifer had given her the night before. She'd been kissed, but she'd never been kissed like that. She'd somehow always expected him to be demanding and fiery, but the kiss he'd given her held none of that. It was more comparable to a hug, to a gentle smile. It still baffled her, she didn't know what it was or where it had come from. However, as she looked back upon it, the memory warmed her heart.

Having gone unnoticed for most of the day, her stomach rumbled in a desperate attempt to catch her attention. Quistis had skipped lunch, having been throwing a huge fit inside one of the base offices at the time she normally met Ann and Pita in front of the mess hall. She'd attempted going to eat only a few times on her own, and found the experience somewhat intimidating. Everyone would turn and look at her the moment she walked in, and the stares wouldn't leave until she departed. It was somewhat more bearable with company. Seifer, in reality, was her preferred dinner date, as his presence usually kept the other soldiers at bay.

It was nice to be held under the wing of his hostility from time to time. From that position, she could see how his mannerisms worked to his advantage, keeping others a safe distance away. Slowly, she was starting to understand why he acted the way he did.

"Mrs. Almasy?" a low voice made her pause, and she turned to see a young soldier walking up to her. A bright smile crossed his handsome face, and his tight, blonde curls glittered in the light of the sinking sun.

"Yes?"

"Oh...I was just seeing if it was really you," he shrugged. "You're quite famous here, you know." Quistis tilted her head.

"I was just starting to get that feeling," she admitted.

"Oh, well...I just saw your husband," he announced. "You are looking for him, aren't you?"

"Actually, I was just going for a walk," Quistis shrugged. "You can walk with me if you'd like." The young man - Quistis guessed he was maybe eighteen or nineteen - sent her a warm smile and nodded lightly.

"Beautiful and sweet?" he laughed. "That Seifer's a lucky man."

"I'm beginning to wonder about that actually," Quistis started walking again, the soldier falling into step beside her. The act was an easy one to fall into, she'd done it so many times already that day. Quistis, the concerned wife, she was getting good at wearing the mask of her new identity.

"Wonder about what?" he prompted her, almost as if on cue.

"Seifer's luck," she put on a delicate frown. "I've heard that Galbadia might be going to war soon."

"Yeah, I've heard that too," he nodded. "But...I'm sure they won't send him somewhere really dangerous. I mean, with a baby on the way and all."

"So, you think the rumors are true, then?" she brushed her hair back behind her ears, giving the young man the best puppy dog eyes she could muster.

"I don't know," he shrugged. "I suppose there's a little bit of truth in every rumor. Maybe it isn't all it's cracked up to be, but something's probably going on."

"Yeah...that's what I was thinking too," she nodded. Silence fell between them as they continued across the base, making their way through areas of tall, green grass. The sun was sinking further, and the sky had turned from blue, to yellow, to a deep crimson. The grass brushed against Quistis' bare calves, producing a tingling itch just beneath the skin.

"Quistis!" They both stopped, looking up to watch Seifer trot up to them. He looked back and forth from Quistis to the soldier for a moment, a hint of unease in his eyes. "I've been looking all over for you."

"Is something wrong?" Seifer took in a deep breath, and glanced at the younger soldier for a slightly tense moment.

"No, nothing's wrong," he shrugged. "I just didn't want to go to dinner without you."

Quistis' stomach, which had quieted down quite suspiciously, flared to life, rumbling in response to Seifer's words. The young soldier, she still didn't even know his name, laughed and patted Seifer on the arm.

"I'll see if I can find some way to get the groping crowd out of the mess hall before you get there," he announced, seeming to share in some sort of secret with Seifer.

"Alright...thanks," Seifer nodded, turning his attention back to Quistis as the other man walked away.

"The groping crowd?" she cocked an eyebrow.

"There's a group of guys on base who are known for not believing in hands off," Seifer shrugged, then after some thought motioned back to the blonde man who was quickly becoming a distant blot of color. "What were the two of you up to?"

"Just going for a walk," Quistis replied. "I asked him about the rumors, he thinks they're probably true. I also went and talked your senior officers, and none of them would tell me a thing."

"I know, I heard about it from five men already," he grunted, crossing his arms over his broad chest. "Aren't you ever happy with being in the background?"

"Nope," Quistis grinned and shrugged. The bent rays of light from the setting sun were catching in Seifer's dark hair, and she could tell that the rich, ebony hue was fake. Shaking her head, she reached up to touch a wayward strand that was hanging down over his forehead. "Your hair needs to be dyed again...maybe if you stopped eating so much it would grow a little slower."

"Your hair grows even after your dead, Quistis," he pointed out as he pulled her arm down. "I don't think that there's a hell of a lot I can do about it."

"Oh well," she tucked the hand that he'd rejected behind her back and smiled a little. Seifer watched her suspiciously as she started past him, her step light.

"What's with you today?" he demanded, following a short distance behind her.

"Nothing, why?" she rested a hand on the curve of her hip and craned her neck around to look at him.

"You just seem so..." he hesitated, "happy."

"I am happy," she replied.

"What reason could you possibly have to be happy?" he narrowed his eyes at her suspiciously. "We're stuck out in the middle of enemy territory, we still don't know for sure if they're about to attack the governments that have employed us, and we have to pretend that we're married. I really don't see anything to be happy about."

"May I remind you, it's your fault we have to pretend to be married," she replied. "Other than that, I've decided that we can't risk that they might attack. We're going to pull out, meet up in Timber."

"How are we going to pull out?" Seifer asked.

"What do you mean, how?" Quistis shook her head.

"I mean, how are you planning on getting out of here intact?" he clarified.

"You're going to be a father soon," she shrugged. "After the fuss that I made today, they won't blame you for pulling out of the army."

"Makes sense," he nodded. "And Selphie?"

"Selphie will have to come up with her own plan," Quistis replied. "I don't know the specifics of their situation." Seifer fell unusually quiet for a few moments as they continued to walk toward the mess hall, going slowly to give them time to talk privately and to allow the flaxen haired soldier to weed out the lechers.

"Quistis?"

"Hmm?"

"Never mind..." he shrugged, apparently deciding against whatever rude thing he was about to say. Grinning inwardly, Quistis bumped him with her shoulder. She had no idea what had spawned the desire to do such a thing, but decided to attribute it to her overly generous mood. He didn't say anything about it, but his mood seemed to pick up a little.

By the time they arrived at the mess hall, the place was almost abandoned. Outside, darkness was quickly swallowing up the last remnants of sunlight. They both ate with animalistic ferocity, even though the mass produced food was halfway cold. An easy silence fell over them, one they'd been working toward for days. They'd hurled every insult, every hurtful thought at one another, and their silence was born out of a newfound peace at having nothing else to say.

"Haven't you eaten today?" Seifer asked, looking up from his meal.

"Not since breakfast," Quistis replied. "Which consisted of a muffin and some coffee."

"Why didn't you eat more?"

"Woke up late," she shrugged. He laughed, leaning back in his chair across from her.

"So guilt really keeps you up at night then, huh?" he grinned.

"Among other things," she nodded. He laughed, tossing his head back in abandon. The strange, childish mischief that had infected Seifer the night before hit her full force as she watched him. As he continued to laugh at her expense, she sought out his feet under the table with her own. When she finally found him, she ran her toes up the length of his calf, drawing his attention. His gaze flew across the table to meet hers, and she sent him a mischievous grin moments before she brought her heel painfully down on top of his foot, aiming for the precarious place where his laces met.

"Ow!" he scooted back in his chair quickly, caught off guard.

"Don't laugh at me," she scolded him.

"Ah...damn...that hurt," he bent down to gently touch the spot where Quistis had so violently assaulted him. "That was really mean...I hope the guilt keeps you up all night."

"Somehow, I don't think I'll be feeling guilty for that," she replied, smiling.

"Little witch," he shook his head.

"You know," she shoved a forkful of food in her mouth, chewed, swallowed, and then continued, "there are only so many times you can say that before I start to believe it."

"You damn well should believe it," he sneered, albeit half-heartedly. They finished eating and left together to go back to their room. Quistis still had to dye Seifer's hair before either of them could go to bed. Her excuse for doing it for him was that he might miss a spot, and thus screw up the whole covert operation all together. However, she doubted Seifer lacked the skills to dye his own hair. She rather liked making him sit down and bend to her will.

They stepped out into the warm, humid night air. Above them, stars dotted an inky sky and a mere sliver of the moon rained down a precious little light. Quistis considered herself an intelligent woman, and she knew that moonlight and sunlight were really the same thing. Somehow, even knowing what she did, moonlight seemed achingly more romantic. Fancies and dreams spawned in moonlight were so often destroyed by the golden rays of the sun. The light of day brought more clarity and more reason than did the gentle glow of the moon.

Taking in a deep breath, she wrapped her arms around herself.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Why are you hugging yourself like your stomach just threatened to hop out, then?" Seifer persisted.

"I'm just..." she paused, wondering whether he would understand what she'd been thinking. "I was just thinking."

"About what?"

"Actually, the moon," she shrugged.

"Monsters?"

"No...the moon itself."

"Oh."

He was quiet for a time before he spoke up again. In the dark she could only make out shadows and textures, and she couldn't tell what sort of expression he wore as he talked.

"I was just thinking about what it must be like to be really married." His announcement shocked Quistis, but he went on undaunted. "I mean, to have a constant companion like that. Somebody who wants nothing out of you besides your company..."

"Am I supposed to reply to that?"

"Nah, was just a thought."

They walked on further, both of them pensive and silent. Had they been talking to one another, they might have missed the sound of hushed voices. They exchanged looks, and Seifer grabbed Quistis by the arm. Slowly, carefully, they crept through the shadows. Seifer was in front and as he let go of her hand, Quistis grabbed onto the back of his shirt. The voices became clearer as they slid further along the wall, each straining at the small sound of their footsteps.

"Seifer!" Quistis gasped and jumped up against him as the two people talking came into view.

"Shh," he bade her quietly.

"Seifer...that's one of the men that I talked to today," she whispered, her voice hardly audible.

"Shh," he repeated. He slipped with her into a doorway, hiding them in the deeper shadows there. Pressed tightly against the wall, they fell silent and eves dropped on the two men's conversation.

"The rumors are getting pretty bad," the taller of the two men announced. "If we keep saying we can't say anything on the subject, everyone's going to assume they're true."

"We can't confirm," the other man shook his head. "And at this point it would do us no good to deny. The attack is scheduled for Monday, this base won't be involved right off. If there are some rumors flying around among the men here, we can live with that."

"It's not just the men, Sir."

"Oh?"

"A woman came to see me today, her husband's a training soldier here," he explained. "She was pretty persistent, demanded I tell her and went through quite a number of theatrics to get it out of me."

"Did you say anything?"

"No...of course not." He paused. "She threw my paper weight, the one of the woman. It broke."

"She threw your paper weight?"

Seifer nudged Quistis in the darkness, and she merely shrugged in response. Leaning over him so she could see too she rested her chin on his shoulder.

"Yeah, picked it up and heaved it right to the floor."

"It doesn't matter," the other man shook his head. "She doesn't make any difference, she's just heard the rumors and is worried for her husband, no big surprise there really. Just don't let the men rally behind her. In less than a week, they'll know the truth anyway. Hold out until then."

"Alright."

Seifer and Quistis both let out a long breath that they hadn't been aware of holding as the two men walked off in different directions from one another. She had her hand fisted tightly around the material of Seifer's shirt, and her heart was thudding excitedly against her ribs.

"That was it," she whispered. "Confirmation."

"Yeah." He shifted a little, and Quistis realized for the first time how close they were standing to one another. Standing still for a moment, she noticed the heat coming from his body and took in the scent of her own shampoo that was radiating from his head. For a long, frightening moment, she felt herself leaning in. Seifer turned and, met with his shoulder, she flushed from head to toe. Thankful for the darkness, she released the death grip she had on his shirt and took a step back from the short wall they were both hugging.

"We'd better call Selphie..." she swallowed. Seifer followed her out into the now heavy night.

Quistis' butterfly heart slowed, bogged down by the hefty realization that, in the dark shadows, she'd experienced not one, but two life altering affirmations.