FF9-Of Luck, Love, and Two Left Feet
Author's Note: This is for those who've begged me time and again to make a romantic fanfic involving Steiner and Beatrix. While I don't doubt that those two are right for one another, I do feel that the romance would be bumpy at first. C'mon, Beatrix and Steiner??! I almost think Garnet and Steiner would be more likely in a nice May/December relationship. Heh, yeah, I've already written that. I don't think those two belong together, honestly. Anyway, I'm going to try to portray Steiner's courting Bea as realistically as I can. I just feel sorry for the big guy ^_-

Disclaimer: All characters portrayed herein are property of Square Soft. This story is fictional and not for distribution without the permission of the author (mercybrand@hotmail.com). I do not own these characters in any way, I just play narrator to their lives.

Of Luck, Love, and Two Left Feet


While the buzz of court droned on around him, Steiner rolled his shoulders to relieve his fatigue. He hid a yawn behind a wide grimace and glanced sidelong at his counterpart on the other side of the Queen. Beatrix stood there, strong, proud, and unmoving as a statue. Her covered eye faced him, but he was certain she was watching the proceedings on the floor with eyes as keen as a dragon's. Steiner straightened and returned his gaze to the floor.

After a time, his eyes unfocused and he began to roll his plans over in his mind. After court, he'd take his leave of Queen Garnet and try to engage Beatrix in a casual conversation on her way to the barracks. 'How was your exercise this morning?' No, that would be awkward to ask. 'Did you enjoy breakfast this morning?' No, no, he thought. Beatrix was too practical. Breakfast would have just been bread, fruit, and maybe an egg. 'How about the weather?' How pathetict, he thought resignedly.

Steiner shuffled the numbness from his feet and risked a glance to Queen Garnet seated beside him. His smile was small and private while he continued scanning the room. He had no problems speaking to his queen, why then, was he having trouble finding words for someone who was practically his equal? Because, he berated himself bitterly, the thought of driving her away-it's just unthinkable.

Court was dismissed while Steiner berated himself internally. He didn't notice until Beatrix crossed the floor and into his field of vision that he had missed his queue. He broke out in a cold sweat and sputtered some quick, garbled excuse to his queen before stumbling after Beatrix. Garnet watched wide-eyed and confused. Had he just said his chocobo was on fire?!

Beatrix heard Steiner's approach, but his cool, gauntlet-clad hand on her shoulder surprised her. She turned, one eye scanning him questioningly. Beads of sweat stood out on his upper lip as he tried to stammer out some statement. Beatrix shook her head, causing those thick curls to bounce over her shoulders. "Captain, I can't understand a word you're saying. Is there an emergency?"

Steiner coughed and quickly removed his hand from Beatrix's shoulder. "Wh-er-emergenceny?! No, no. Everything is under control, General." Steiner straightened and wrung his hands nervously. "I simply wanted to go back to the barracks."

Beatrix knotted her brow. Steiner had been acting stranger than usual lately. Maybe the moons were misaligned? Who knew. She shrugged and turned back to her business with a cooly polite, "Please, don't let me stop you." When Steiner placed a hand on her shoulder again, she bristled with annoyance.

Steiner proposed, "With you," quickly when he saw that familiar irritation in her expression. "Please," he added as an afterthought.

"Fine," Beatrix resigned with a heavy sigh. She crossed the floor and Steiner shuffled after her. "So why-" she began but was cut off by his question.

"How was your weather today?"

"What?" She leered at him curiously.

"Oh, I'm sorry. You were going to ask me something?"

"No-well, yes, but it's not important," she replied. "What did you just ask?"

Steiner's mind went blank. What did he ask? How was breakfast or how was the weather? Which was it? Bad luck be damned, but he couldn't remember. He scratched at his chin and tried again, "Good day?"

He was acting weird. All that fuss for such a simple question? What was Steiner hiding? "It's a routine day," she admitted at length. "Up until the last five minutes." With that, she turned down the hall and placed a hand on the door to her quarters.

"Well, that's good," he responded out of habit. "No! Wait!" He held out his hands as she pushed the door open. "I have something for you?" He pat his hips, chest, and finally remembered that he'd tucked the small piece of paper into his glove. Digging the folded paper out of his glove, he turned it over to her with his chin raised proudly.

Curiosity piqued, Beatrix accepted the paper and unfolded it. She turned it twice until the writing was right side up and then read aloud, "Take dirty undergarments to launders, buy quill, patrol Captain, is this your daily checklist?" she asked in that voice that made clear she wasn't amused. Fed up with his tomfoolery, she flicked the paper his way and retired to her quarters.

Steiner wobbled as the door slammed in his face. The scrap of paper flipped once and then landed on his foot. What had gone wrong? He picked up the paper and read it. It was his daily checklist! Steiner's heart dropped into his hollow stomach. How long had he worked to make that poem perfect for her? He knew he couldn't have caught more than two hours of sleep before the sun rose and he was called to duty. Steiner checked his other glove. Sure enough, the paper with the poem on it was there, but his sweat had caused the ink to run over the expensive paper. Steiner wilted. His knuckles practically scraped the ground as he drug himself back to his quarters and collapsed on his bed.

Before sleep pulled him down into darkness, he prayed for another chance.


Author's note: Poor guy. By the way, when I write, I do it with the Yoshitaka Amano illustration of Steiner, not the in-game Steiner. In-game Steiner looks like the ultimate Cure fan with that eyeliner on, eh? Anyway, look! This is my first non-lemon. Woot. More to come