Only God Knows Why…
Disclamier: I don't own so you don't sue.
Just an old solider. He had seen everything. No he shook his head. He still hadn't seen West go a day without tripping over his feet. He expected he would have to wait an eternity and he was sure he still wouldn't see a day that West didn't trip over his feet. He thought how depressing that was the only thing he hadn't seen.
He would just drown himself in his drinking. He had no one who was at threat if he was drunk. He lived in that house alone. He had no family. No one who ever gave a damn about him. He held his glass tightly shattering it to pieces in his hand. Cutting his hand up badly. He didn't feel the pain. It was all numb. He was numb inside.
All he could feel was the dizziness. The never ending dizzy spells that kept his world spinning out of control. He was a great man. He had the stature of a general. But he rejected the high honor so he could stay away from the wars and the haunting battlefield. '
He felt safer dealing with the war on the streets. He could deal with that. The streets were always cruel, cold places. Yet Rosalie lived there for almost ten years off and on. She had learned of its ways. She was a survivor of many things.
He found out that trip for a year endured her body under the worst circumstances. She was shot in the collar bone and it rickshaded going through one of her lungs, nicked the heart muscle and placed itself in the base of the spine.
He could never have her strength. Never have her trust towards anyone who was not human. She thought of him as a person. A person was an individual human being. Perhaps she did at one time thing he was human compared to some of the slim she probably met on the streets.
He felt his whole body shaking. He couldn't stand the effects of Earth's gravity and fell to the floor. He knocked his head on the glass table. He groaned as he hit the ground. Perhaps he shouldn't have taken so many pain killers. It was a little too late to correct his mistake. He couldn't learn from this one.
I've been sitting here,
Trying to find myself,
Get behind myself,
I need to rewind myself,
Looking for the playback,
Listen for the playback,
They say every man bleeds like me,
I feel like number one,
But I'm last in line,
I watch my youngest son,
It helps pass the time,
I take too many pills,
It helps easy the pain,
I made a couple dollar bills,
But I still feel the same.
People don't know about the things I say or do,
They don't understand the shit I've been through,
It's been so long since I've been home,
I've been gone for long,
I've been gone for too long,
Maybe I forgot all the things I miss,
Oh somehow there's more to life than this,
I said it too many times,
I still stand firm,
You get what you put in,
And people get what they deserve,
Still I ain't seen mine,
I ain't seen mine,
I've been giving but not getting,
I've been walking that there line,
I think I'll keep walking,
With my head held high,
I keep moving on,
Only god knows why,
Only god,
Only god,
Only god knows why,
Only god,
Knows…
Why…
Take me to the river,
Take me to the river,
His heart stopped that night. It couldn't take anymore heart ache or break. He felt himself dying slowly. He didn't try avoiding it. He felt a cold hand touch his hand. "Daddy come on home?"
"Where am I?"
"In your house."
"This is my home."
"Don't be afraid. You've died. Come on let's go home."
"Alright I'm coming home."
"Thank you. I've been waiting for a long time." He grasped the little girl's hand before kneeling down and picking her up. He knew where he had to go. He dreamt of rejoining his wife and old friends one day.
"I am not sure if it is good or bad so you again old friend."
"Ah reckon it be since seeing he's the last one of us old timers to die."
"We're hardly old. Sixty's pretty young to die these days Jimbo." Bennet ignored his old comrades turning to see Derk standing beside his wife. He stepped back from the force she hugged him. He held his child in one arm and hugged his wife with another.
"Daddy I've missed you."
"I've missed you too baby."
"Do you remember my name?"
"How could I forget my little Jessica?" She kissed him softly on his cheek wrapping her small fragile arms around his neck.
"I love you."
"Yes but do you know I still love you?"
"Always." He placed her down on the ground. He hugged his wife spinning her around. He was happy to finally find his family once again. His wife pulled away.
"Why are you crying?"
"I'm happy to finally be home."
"It's good to finally have you home."
