Take A Bow
Say your lines,
But do you feel them,
Do you mean what you say?
When there's no one around,
Watching you watching me,
Lyrics from Madonna's song Take a Bow.
Ro felt Warren wrap his arms around her tighter. She watched as her friends watched them. He always acted so sweet around them. Ro wrapped her arms around his neck tighter. She needs to feel the closeness of someone.
"I love you Ro."
"Hmm, I love you too Warren." She lied but it kept him happy. He was much better happy than angry. He leaned in kissing her gently. He always apologized at least for his actions. She always felt something in his kisses anyway. She wasn't ever sure but it didn't seem too bad. He pulled away from her. She shyly looked down and tried to shrink away from existence.
She looked across the room to see the last person she wanted to see standing across the room. Zee standing there looking awfully sad. She had to make sure it wasn't obvious that she saw him. He never could take a hint. She was going to get hurt if he stayed around any longer. He left seeming to say goodbye just in one glance.
Zee saw her dancing with Warren. She looked so happy so engrossed with him. He was too late. He couldn't stop Warren from taking her away or change the person Ro loved. He would just have to go and leave her forever.
She told him she didn't love him. She said the words he wished she would take back. Deny or tell him she was lying or she was blind but nothing. He worked on a few projects to pass the time. He visited Dr. Selig a few times over the next few months getting a checkup.
"Zeta, are you under going a lot of stress?"
"No, Dr. Selig."
"Well perhaps you are getting used to these new feelings and emotions. I want you to write, out what you feel everyday at the end or perhaps in the afternoon. No one has to see this but you. But you need an outlet for your emotions. You can't keep them bottled up inside."
"Alright Dr. Selig."
"IS there anything you need to speak about?"
"No I suppose I have trouble sleeping at night."
"Hmm, that is also a sign that you're under a lot of stress. Has the death of Bennet troubled you any?"
"No I know how to deal with death."
"Well I think you have a few things to sort out with yourself."
"Dr. Selig I'm just troubled right now. I don't know how to put it in words or to express it. I don't even know why I'm getting worked up all about it."
"Well I can't help you unless you state the problem."
"I just need to go home perhaps relax for a week."
"Very well. Take care of yourself Zeta."
"I will Dr. Selig."
*******
Zee sat in his kitchen looking around. He was truly alone. He liked writing on paper better than typing it. Writing on paper seems so much more personal than the typing.
I sit here in this big house. I've been told I've earned it all. My maids tell me I'm a good man. One with a kind and gentle heart. I suppose the good guys don't always win. I haven't heard from Ro but then again she made it quite clear that she didn't like me anyway. I'm so scared. I don't even know why. Scared Ro will never speak to me again. Scared to sleep at night for the nightmares are only waiting. Ro was right there are definitely some negative things of being human.
Zee just stared at the piece of paper. He crumpled it up angrily. How could he have let this happen? How could he just of let Ro go? She had been everything to him. He could have told her he felt something for her earlier. She would have understood. He hugged himself tightly as he curled down to the ground crying. She would think of him nothing but a horrible person that was to be forgotten long ago.
************
Ro sat at a table by herself for lunch. She looked down at the ground. She never felt so small, so insignificant. She was sure Warren was proud of himself. Shea and Sega sat down beside her. "Hey Ro what's wrong girl?"
"Nothing just didn't sleep well."
"What in the world are you upset you've got the cutest guy in school. I bet he's gonna marry you. You two seem so perfect for each other." Ro smiled sadly. Yeah perfectly wrong for each other.
"At least you have a boyfriend. I'm still single."
"But Ro likes being single."
"No I just wasn't really interested in anybody."
"Do you like Warren?"
"I suppose."
"Man I think she needs her head checked. She's got the most perfect guy in the world. What in the world is so wrong about him? He brings her a rose just because he feels like it." Ro thought how if they only knew. The bruises, the fights, those roses were just apologies for stuff he did to her. Of course she was just insane for not liking the most perfect guy in the world.
"So Ro what are you doing for your birthday?"
"Going to the nineties diner."
"Alright." Her friends both cheered. Ro pulled a folded up picture from her jacket pocket. Zee holding her up. He would probably never speak to her again. Why didn't she just run away with him? How could she be so dumb? Warren never stood a chance against Zee.
"Only a few more days till your birthday Ro. Things have to look up girl." She sighed. She was insane talking to herself. How much crazier could she get? She had other things to worry about like what she would do about Warren.
Warren walked up to her down the hall. "Hey baby." He kissed her cheek to her disgust. "What do you want for your birthday?"
"I don't care anything's fine from you."
"How about a diamond bracelet? Me and you can go to the mall tonight and pick it out."
"Why don't you pick it out?"
"Alright just wanted to make sure it fit right that's all. What's wrong baby?"
"Just a little stressed out okay. I had to go to a funeral last weekend and a few things came up."
"Aww, why didn't you tell me someone died. I would have understood."
"No I don't think anyone understands what he meant to me."
"Well I'll talk to you when you're not so upset alright?" He walked off not letting her answer.
"No it's not alright. Everything isn't okay." She said to him as he left her alone once again. "Everything is anything but okay."
**That Evening**
Ro screamed in frustration. She had no one to go to. She pushed all of her award to the ground making a loud thump sound. She threw her stuff around throwing a big tantrum. She finally fell to the ground. She was dizzy again.
She just curled up in a ball never wanting to have to move from the spot. Jake and Jack stood at the doorway. They had seen everything. They walked over touching her softly. "Ro…"
She looked up frightened out of her life. "Ro tell us what's wrong please."
"No I can't." She wasn't just causing herself pain but pain to her family. She stood up. She stood up proud and tall like she always would. "You guys wouldn't understand."
"Ro you don't even give us a chance. What's wrong? If it's that bad you don't have to protect us. We'll be okay as long as you're okay."
"That's the problem. I'm not gonna be alright." She picked the small seven-year-olds up and placed them on her bed. She kneeled down to them. "You guys are fine. I'm sick."
"Are you dying?"
"No I won't die for a long time." She kissed them both on the head. She went over and cleaned up the mess she made. She set everything back to the way it was. A storm slowly made its way in. "Now you two go to your room. The others will be home later tonight."
"No we want to stay with you."
"Just for tonight please?"
"Alright I'll be back in a minute." She grabbed some pjs and changed into them. She came back in seeing her brothers anxiously waiting her return. She placed one on each of her sides. They cuddled up close resting on her shoulder.
While Ro was asleep Jack and Jake talked to one another. "Look at how pale she is."
"She said she was sick. She doesn't have a fever."
"Maybe she's what mom calls lonely."
"She has us, Warren and her friends how can she be lonely."
"Zee's not around."
"He never was around much."
"Maybe she's having a few doubts about something."
"Don't worry so much about her Jack. She's not going anywhere."
"I know. I just worried about her that's all." He looked at Ro's wrists. They looked really bruised at the moment actually her whole arm did. "Zee you better come and be her hero soon. She might not last that much longer."
