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Author Notice: Yes, I've noticed a lack of quality among my works, so I've decided to make this chapter a strange psychedelic weird piece of garbage, so work with me here.

Transplantation (A Strange Tale in)

Chapter 3

After Akane had gone to sleep, I reinstated control and stood up. I sat upon the bed, gazing at the room that was my interim home for the past, what, 2 weeks now? I sighed and picked up my micro-computer.

dir

HELPFILE.txt

HELPFILE1.txt

HELPFILE2.txt

HELPFILE3.txt

HELPFILE4.txt

PERSONAL.txt

edit PERSONAL.txt

I went and typed in my daily log. All I had put down over the days were 'Day completed successfully. Goal not attained'. I now put in more:

If you don't know, back at CalTech, my roomie was some psycho new age guy who kept ranting about the new world order and dictatorship. It was bull, because I am a liberal and fascists like him deserve to rot in the sewers. Ah, what was I saying? Oh yeah. To escape those mind-rupturing rants, I stuffed some earplugs into my ears and covered my head with my pillow. I then let my mind wander, like so.

What is Chess? Chess is the strategic game whereas a form of intelligence duels another form of intelligence with strategic pieces that move a particular way. What is intelligence? Intelligence is the condition whereas the victim(yes, victim) experiences logical statements. If that is correct, is it true that most people are not intelligent? Yes, as a matter of fact, most people are not intelligent.

See? Then, there are events where I imagine myself in something, much like what was happening now. Yech. Having a fantasy come true isn't necessarily a good thing, myself an example. I mean, how the hell am I, a lowly college student struggling to keep his English grade above a C, supposed to play matchmaker to this couple? I am a 2nd dan martial artist, but Ranma's what, a 5th or 6th dan? Even Akane's at least a 4th dan. Gotta ask her about that. So how in the name of mind distortion can I play matchmaker?

End log. That was a long thing. After a bit of reminiscing, the computer beeped. I glanced at it.

dir/n

SELFHELP.txt

SHRINK.txt

PSYCHWARD.txt

Yeah, very funny Kami.

view SELFHELP.txt

Hey, Fabrice

I read your rant and I needed to tell you something. When you go into a body, you 'inherit' all that body's innate skills, but you also retain your own skills. Note the combo chow mein episode. You have not engaged in fights yet, but be ready.

-Fulaga

exit

That's bull. I just need to avoid the damn fights. I lay back, gave control back to the sleeping Akane, and recessed.

In the morning, Akane went through the daily routine, then went downstairs. Kasumi had prepared the morning meal already, and it smelled delicious.

[Hey, Akane?]

[Hm. Yeah, what?]

[What level dan are you?]

[4th.]

[And Ranma?]

[Em, I think the baka is 7th.]

[Bleah. I just gotta…]

My thought was interrupted as two men in suits kicked the door open.

[What is this? MIB?]

"We are MIB agents J and K. Will Akane Tendo please answer."

[Shit, I HAD to ask.]

[What's MIB?]

[You know...oh wait, you don't. MIB is just another American film.]

[Ah. So what do I do?]

[How the hell should I know? In my area, MIB don't exist! At least, I don't think so…]

[Do I turn myself in?]

[Whatever.]

"Hey! Whattrye' doin to Akane?" Ranma leapt down the stairs and faced the two agents.

"J?"

"On it, K."

J pulled out a large pistol and shot Ranma, throwing his body out through the house wall.

"RANMA!" Akane ran out after him, J and K closely following. When we reached Ranma, who was lying near the koi pond, he looked like he was hit by a freight train, but okay.

"Ms. Tendo? We shall leave."

"But…"

"As I said, we shall leave."

They dragged Akane out the door and threw her into a limo. The limo drove off. Soun and Genma were at their shogi positions, as usual.

"My daughter has been kidnapped! WAAAAAAH!"

"Ranma! How dare you not protect your fiancee?"

"Oh my! Did we have visitors?"

At the secret (hint, Ottawa)compound

"Now, alien, rise and shine."

I was in control, but strapped into a chair with a lamp glaring down at me. I shifted, uncomfortably aware of the leather straps against my stomach and chest. "I told you before, I am not an alien!"

"Bull. We have your brain scans from a few years ago. You do not have the brain scan of an average Caucasian American."

"THAT'S BECAUSE I AM AN ASIAN JAPANESE!"

"Oh. Sorry for the disturbance."

The world then erupted in a large cacophony of blaring multicolored lights. It reassembled itself into the world, and I was in my dorm room.

"Was that…a dream?"

Just then, a large Ultralisk came in and gored my roommate. It faced me.

"NOOOOOOOOOO…"

The world imploded, then re-assembled itself. I was back in Akane's room in the middle of the night. Just to be sure, I sucker-punched myself.

[OW! Why did you do that, baka?]

[Eh, nothing. Go back to sleep.]

I lay back, covered myself with the blanket, then slept.

In the godly realm

"Now, Fulaga. Was there a reason for this escapade?"

"I am sorry Kami, but Urd was infested by a bug and went on a rampage. Fortunately, the damage has been repaired and Urd cleansed."

"Good."



Uahahahahha. Anyway, TBC and so on and so forth. And yes, I really do rant and let my imagination go wild when my roomie goes off on his fascist rant.