Kuririn Got Back!!



By RavenGems9 a.k.a Tee-Hee

A/N: I never really saw all the episodes of the Freeza saga but when I saw a picture of Kuririn in that Saiya armor and I only had one thing to say and that is 'WOW!! Kuririn is HOT!!!!' * Fans self * He looks too good in those hot pants. You rarely get to see his legs and what great legs he has ^_^ and the cutest little butt, it all just WOW. Now I'm obsessed with Kuririn's ass –yep- that's right -obsess with his ASS! * Rap intro plays and I sing * I like Kuririn's butt! And I cannot lie! Something – something … blah blah don't know all the words… Kuririn Got Back!

Of course I don't only like Kuririn's butt, Piccolo got a nice set of buns on him as well ^_^ such a shame he always wear that baggy gi * sighs * ~_~. And of course there's Vegeta- okay, now I'm babbling! Onward to the fic!



Summary: I like Kuririn's butt! But I'm not the only one. A certain DBZ character notices it too. Hmm… who could it be? Read to find out.

P.S: takes place during the Freeza saga



On Freeza ship on Namek…



After fighting the Ginyu Force Gohan, Kuririn, and Vegeta were taking a much-needed break as Goku was recovering in the isolation tank. Vegeta decided to get a new change of armor and gave Gohan and Kuririn some armor as well.

Freeza was coming and Vegeta needed to be prepared. He begin to think back- -way back of when a great secret of the ice-jin (Freeza's race) was reveal to him so long ago…

~*~*~ Flashback



An old wise-looking man stood before Vegeta. He had beady black eyes and a long white beard and carried a long staff quite similar to what Kami and Korin carry.

" Old man, I've heard you know the great secret weakness of the ice-jin," said Vegeta

" Indeed, I do, young Grasshopper," said old man

" Don't call me that!"

" My apologies, young Dung Beetle,"

" JUST TELL ME THE SECERT BEFORE I BLAST YOU!!!"

" Okay, okay… jeez you don't have to yell! * Ahem * The ice-jin weakness, the key to ensure ones victory over any ice-jin no matter how strong it may be. Only if it's remembered… if it's forgotten your death will sure. The secret that had not been told for thousands of years. And that secret is…"

~*~*

"Hey, Vegeta!"

"What!?" snapped Vegeta. 'Who dares interrupts my thoughts!'

Vegeta turned around to see Kuririn dressed in the outfit he gave him minus the armor just the hot pants (A/N: * fans self once more * Hot!!)

"Um, I just want to say thanks for the new clothes," twirls around happily unknowingly showing off that cute bum of his " I never wore clothes like this before, its feels like I'm wearing nothing at all!"

Vegeta blinked blankly " Don't forget to put on the armor, baka"

"Oh, heh-heh …right," turns to leave giving Vegeta yet another view of his backside then he left.

" Okay, now where was I?" Vegeta thought out aloud ' The key of destroying any ice-jin is- damn that Kuririn guy got a nice ass…'

Blinks confused " Where the hell did that came from!" he said angrily to himself " Okay… need to think…the key to defeat any ice-jin is – Kuririn's ass…. KUSO!!! That's all I can think about now!"

"Kuririn-san!" Gohan's voice sounded from hallway " Do you feel that?"

" Yeah!" Kuririn's voice " There's a really big ki coming this way. Must be Freeza!"

" Freeza?" indeed Vegeta could sense him too.

So, Kuririn, Gohan and Vegeta rushed outside to confront the threat coming their way.

Gohan and Kuririn crouched in a fighting stance defense fully in front while Vegeta stood calmly in back.

' Vegeta, think!' he cursed himself silently 'The key to defeat any ice-jin is…I forgot! Grrrr, damn you Kuririn. Think Freeza- ice-jin…ice…cold," thoughts suddenly linger back to Kuririn's tight butt "…cold shower…"

"The ice-jin weakness," the old man's voice sounded in Vegeta's head "the key to ensure ones victory… if only it's remembered if it's forgotten your death will be sure… and that secret is …"

"Whoa, Freeza's coming fast!" Kuririn said, " Oops, dropped my wristband." Bends down to get it

Vegeta stares as Kuririn bends over, his little toosh as it straining against the spandex

Old man voice: "and that secret is- spank Kuririn's ass, spank it good!"

SMACK!!!

Kuririn literally leapt five feet in the air when he felt Vegeta's hand made contact with his bum.

" OW!! Vegeta what was that for!?"

" Uh, good luck. ^^;;"

"Ookkaayy…" Kuririn slowly backs away from him, "…getting scared now…"

"Guys, look!" Gohan shouted pointing to something off in the distance. In the not so far distance stood a short horned figure. Freeza.

" Well, well, well," said Freeza amused " Three little idiots so eager to die."

" I don't think so, Freeza!" Vegeta said, " I know your secret."

"Y-you do?" said Freeza somewhat scared and looking paler than usual ' Oh, no!' thought the little tyrant 'Does Vegeta know I collect beanie babies as a hobby? If he tells anyone I'll be the laughingstock of the universe! Maybe he doesn't really knows…'

" Of course he knows!" shrieked the imaginary pink bunny that only Freeza can see

" Oh, Fluffy, what should I do?" Freeza asked his imaginary friend in a very child-like way

" Kill 'im!"

" What? Vegeta?! But -" blushes and giggles bashfully " I kinda like him" looks over to Vegeta's direction and winks at him. Vegeta noticed and shudders in disgust.

Fluffy jumped up and slapped Freeza across his face " That's pansy-talk, Freeza! Do you want your daddy to find out you been collecting Beanie Babies? He'll probably take 'em away!"

Freeza gasped "Even the Special Olympics edition?!" Freeza sniffled holding back tears

" Especially the Special Olympics edition" Fluffy replied

" WAAHHH! I can't let that happen!"

" Then kill 'im!" Fluffy shrieked on the top of his lungs, tossing little paws into the air " Kill them all! BWA-HAHAHAHA!!!"

" Okay, Fluffy"-sniff, sniff – " I'll kill them…"

" Atta boy, Freeza, atta boy"



" Uh, Kuririn-san," Gohan whispered, " Who's Freeza 's talkin' to?" they both sweatdropped as Freeza continue to have a very deep conversation with thin air.

Kuririn shrugged " I dunno."

(A/N: See, Freeza wasn't evil. All Freeza wanted to do was to play with his Beanie Babies, his Barbie dolls and Teletubbie pluhies /Especially Twinkie-Winkie/. See, it was the pink bunny that made him did all those naughty things and of course I'm making this all up. I HATE Freeza. Why? Because he killed my Vegeta! He killed my Kuririn. He killed my bulbasaur. My bulbasaur? Wait a sec…that's a pokemon…AAAHHH!!! I did not mean to bring that monstrosity of an anime into this fic. Gomen! Gomen nasai!)



Meanwhile Vegeta was now sweating bullets. 'Damn, what did that old man said again?' Vegeta desperately prodded his mind for the answer then the old man's voice came to him again

Old man's voice: And that secret is to…Hey, Vegeta!

Kuririn's voice pops up in his thoughts "I just want to say thanks for the new clothes… I've never wore clothes like this before, its feel like I'm wearing nothing at all!"

"Nothing at all!"

"NOTHING AT ALL!"



"Grrrr! DAMN YOU, KURIRIN," shouted Vegeta "AND THAT SEXY BUTT OF YOURS!!"

Everyone present including Freeza looked at him and sweatdropped. Then the rest of the Freeza saga played out as usual.



The End…or is it * evil laugh * hahaha…HaHaHaH…. BWA-HAHAHAHA!!!

RavenGem9: Come on Fluffy! Let's write another stupid story!

* Fluffy jumps up and slaps me across the face*

Fluffy: NO!! We write another story when I say so! Is that clear?

RavenGems9: * holding swollen cheek * Y-Yes, Fluffy

Fluffy: Good! Now… go get me a carrot.

RavenGems9: Yes, Fluffy

Fluffy: Ahem…

RavenGems9: What? Oh, right… yes, Fluffy-sama

Fluffy: That's better… boy, these authors have no respect these days

The Old Man: You got that right, young Ladybug

Fluffy: Shut up, you! * slaps old man *

Disclaimer: I do not own anything of the DBZ characters. However I do own the Old Man and Fluffy the Homicidal Pink Bunny. Hmn… Maybe I should write a spin-off on that. I can see it now " The Adventures of Freeza and Fluffy the Homicidal Pink Bunny!"

Please- PRETTY PLEASE leave a review. Or Fluffy will be very displeased if you don't.