Chapter 7 Jimmy's New Roomie

Disclaimer: These characters are still not mine, however much I wish they were. They belong to DEK, and I think he takes advantage of them at times. I would be much better to them. "So, how is she doing really?" Bobby asked Jimmy. They were standing in Bobby's office. Bobby was preparing for court, and he had called Jimmy in. "I talk to her every day, and I've seen her several times, but you tell me. How is she really doing?" Jimmy took a sip of his coffee. "I think she's doing OK, Bobby. She's cheerful and talkative. She has completely reorganized my apartment. In the first few days, she alphabetized my CDs, videos, and breakfast cereal. Breakfast cereal, Bobby! I am living in an unbelievable state of organization." "Is she working?" Bobby asked. "You know, on clients stuff?" "I think so. Its so nice having her there. She has dinner ready when I get home. Last night it was lasagna, and...." "She cooks for you?" asked Bobby, enviously. "Marina is a fantastic cook. She used to cook for Dad and me after Mom died. What else has she made?" He asked, his mouth watering. "Well, let's see, " said Jimmy, thinking, "the other night it was roast pork with those little potatoes, she made a pasta thing with a mushroom sauce, and...." Bobby stopped him, "Don't tell me anymore. I mean, I love Lindsey, but her cooking is...well, you know...." "I heard that!!" came a voice from the other room. Bobby faced the door and raised his voice a few levels,"But it's getting better all the time!!" He turned back to Jimmy. "Here's the million dollar question: Is she sleeping?" Jimmy shook his head, "Not that I've seen. She stays up, working on the computer long after I go to bed, and sometimes thats past midnight. And she always has breakfast ready when I get up." This was too much for Bobby, " She makes you breakfast, too? Has she made you her French toast yet?" "Yeah," answered Jimmy. "Oh my God. Its like pastry!" "I know," said Bobby, dreamily, remembering. He pulled himself back to reality "See if you can get her to get some sleep, OK?" How am I gonna do that? Jimmy wondered. "I'll try" he said. "Great, " Bobby grabbed his briefcase and prepared to leave. He dropped his voice to a whisper as he passed by Jimmy. "And see if you can get us invited for dinner." ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Jimmy opened the door to his apartment and was greeted by an amazing aroma. "Hello!" he called. Marina was in the kitchen, putting together an impressive looking salad. She smiled. "Hi! How was your day?" She was genuinely happy to see him. He was quickly becoming her favorite person. She felt safe and comfortable with him. He was kind and gentle and they spent hours just talking. "It was good." He looked at the spread of food in front of him. "Marina, you're gonna kill me. You don't need to cook like this every night." "I know. I haven't cooked in years and I had forgotten how much I enjoy it. But I'll take it easy if you want. "Well," he said, sampling one of her dishes, "As long as you don't take it too easy." She handed him a glass of wine and they sat down to eat. He told her all about his day and they teased and laughed. Time always seemed to fly when they were together. Soon they were sitting at a table full of empty dishes, comfortably full, leaning their chairs against the wall with their feet up. They discussed law, family, and many other things before they came to a natural pause in the conversation. Jimmy took his opportunity. "So how are you doing, Marina?" She looked at him, surprised, "I'm doing great! Why do you ask?" He sat his chair down and looked at her. "Its only been 2 weeks. You can't be 'doing great.' Tell me." She sighed. "I am trying to see it clinically. Its very ironic, you know? How many rapists or murderers have I put back on the street? A hundred? I don't know. How many victims did I put on the stand and rape again?" She paused. "You were raised Catholic like me, I know you'll understand this. Something was bound to happen to me. We reap what we sow, Jimmy. The attack shouldn't have surprised me. It did, but it shouldn't have. I should have seen it coming. All of us, really. God will even the score, you know?" He shook his head, "I don't know. Maybe. I mean, I believe in reaping what you sow, too, but.... I don't know." She looked at him and suddenly changed the subject. "What's your dream, Jimmy?" "Huh?" "Whats your dream? We all have one. What's yours?" "I don't know." He became thoughtful. "I love my job. I guess my dream is to have someone to share things with. Have a family...." he drifted off. "A little Jimmy, maybe?" She smiled. "What about the good judge?" "Roberta? I don't know. I don't think so. She's not....what I am looking for the rest of my life. What about you?" "Me?" "Yeah. What's your dream?" She grew quiet and thoughtful. When she spoke, the change in mood was so abrupt, it was wrenching. "My dream is to be able to live with myself." She said, plaintively. He looked at her, surprised, and waited for her to continue. "Do you know why I am so driven, Jimmy? Why I push myself so hard?" He shook his head and reached for her hand. "Its because of Bobby. Do you have any idea what its like to be Bobby Donnell's little sister? I never had a name growing up, I was always just 'Bobby's little sister.' He and Mom were so close, and when she died he and dad got closer. They aren't so much now, but they were then. Anyway, he was perfect. He could do no wrong. Perfect grades, lots of friends... I hated him for a long time. So I thought I needed to even things. I poured myself into school and graduated 2 years early. Bobby went to Law School, so I thought I had to go to Law School, too. You know, to compete on the same level. Then I found out, wonder of wonders, I had a knack for it. I was really good at it. But Bobby did something I could never do: he built a law firm from scratch. I got recognition, I made money, but I could never do that." She paused. "Anyway, a few years ago, I began to realize that I was never competing against Bobby...I was competing against myself. He never saw me as inferior! He was always so proud of me and so supportive. I was young and stupid. Probably had something to do with Mom dying and never dealing with it or something. And the irony of it all is that I never really wanted to be a lawyer! " she chuckled slightly. " But I am good at it, I have clients who depend on me, and I enjoy it, so I continue. But its not what I wanted to be." "What did you want to be?" She smiled, ""That's something I'll never admit out loud...not even to myself. We make crazy decisions when we are young, don't we? Trick ourselves into believing things that aren't true." "You could be great at anything, Marina." He said. "Maybe." She said. " But it's not our abilities that define our lives. It's our choices. And I am notorious for making bad choices." She glanced at her watch." It's late! And you have to work tomorrow." "Bobby wants to know when you are coming back to the office." Jimmy said, stretching and getting up. "Soon. I want my eye to get back to normal before I go back." She said as she got up and began to clear the table. You are gonna sleep tonight, right? You don't need to do all this tonight. Leave it and I'll do it in the morning." "I'll just get started. You go on. I'll go to bed soon." "Allright. If you promise." He kissed her on the cheek. "Good night, Marina." "Good night, Jimmy." ----------------------------------------------- Jimmy was awakened by a sound coming form the other room. He checked the clock. 3:17 am. He saw light coming from the crack under his door and knew that she was still up. He got us and sat at the edge of his bed, running his hand through his hair. He clicked on the light next to his bed to give his eyes a second to adjust, then he went into the kitchen. Marina had decided to rearrange the cupboards and was sitting on the floor surrounded by plastic bowls, pots, and pans. She noticed him standing in the doorway. "Nice jammies." she said. "Yeah...nevermind. Come on." He took her hand and led her to her room. "Marina, this is your bed. I am not sure if you noticed it before, but here it is." He pulled the covers back and stepped aside. "Normal people are in their beds at this time. Get in." She feigned shock. "Jimmy! Are you trying to get me into bed?" His face turned pink all the way to the roots of his hair. He was flustered and began to stammer. She hadn't meant to push him that far. "Allright!" She said, climbing into bed. "I'm sorry. That was out of line." He tossed the covers over her. "Goodnight. Marina." He said wearily. "Goodnight, Jimmy." He turned her light off and closed her door. She listened as his footsteps receded down the hall and heard the click of his door closing. Then she yanked the covers back and sat up, swinging her legs over to the edge. She sat, wondering what she was going to do now. She knew she was done in the kitchen for the night, that had been made clear. She nearly nodded off sitting there, but she jerked herself awake. She was exhausted and her body cried for sleep, was she was terrified to try. Sleep had become her enemy. It was filled with hideous visions, horrible reenactments that were worse than the real thing. In her sleep, she was out of control and victimized again and again. But she was so tired. Sitting there in the dark, exhaustion overtaking her, she began to cry. Silent, desperate tears, that managed to slip down her cheeks before she suppressed them. She knew she needed to sleep, but couldn't stand the thought of another dream. She sat like that for about 20- 30 minutes, wondering what to do. She realized that she had no choice, and hoped he wouldn't get mad at her. She walked to her door, silently opening it and quietly padded down the hall. She stood in front of his door listening. His breathing was deep and even. She knew he was asleep. Her eyes adjusted to the dark and she saw that he was sound asleep on his back, his mouth open slightly, and his arms open. She walked around to the right side of his bed and as quietly as she could, climbed in next to him, laying her head on his chest. She could get up before his alarm went off and he'd never need to know. The beating of his heart and his even breathing soon put her into a dreamless sleep. -------------------------------------- She woke up and looked at the clock. 6:20. perfect. His alarm would go off in just a few minutes and she could get up and he would be none the wiser. It took her a second to realize that his hand was softly stroking her hair. "Jimmy?" she whispered. "Good morning," he whispered back. "Are you mad?" she asked. How could he be mad? Her hair smelled wonderful, and the curve of her hip next to him....god.....keep it together, Jimmy. "Did you sleep well?" he asked. "Yes,. For the first time since I can remember." "Then I'm not mad. But I am only human, so maybe we better get up now." "I understand." She got up. "I'll make coffee." She got up and made her way into the kitchen. He took a moment to collect himself. Did she have any idea how desirable she was? He knew he needed to keep his hands off her, but she drove him crazy. However, he felt strangely protective of her, and enjoyed having her so close. And if she was sleeping, who was he to kick her out? didn't he tell Bobby he would try to get her to sleep? Feeling justified, he got up and got in the shower. ------------------------------------- When Jimmy walked into the office, Bobby caught his eye. "Jimmy. Is she sleeping?" "Yeah, she's sleeping. We worked something out." Bobby sighed with relief. "Good! Well, keep it up." Jimmy walked to his desk. "I'll see what I can do," he mumbled.