Title: Stairway To Heaven
Chapter: One/?
Rating: R
Pairings: KW/KL, Kerry Weaver, Elizabeth Corday
Genre: Drama
Spoilers: Up to and including season eight
Timeline: After Four Corners
Beta Reader: Scotty Welles
Summary: What if during Witch Hunt, and the
following Episodes it wasn't fear that kept Kerry
from helping Kim. What if there was something else
going on with her. What if Kim had no idea
about what that something was.
Disclaimer: Not mine. All characters belong to
Warner Bros and Michael Crichton.
Artist: Led Zeppelin
Title: Stairway To Heaven
There's a lady who's sure
All that glitters is gold
And she's buying a stairway to heaven.
When she gets there she knows
If the stores are all closed
With a word she can get what she came for.
Ooh, ooh, and she's buying a stairway to heaven.
There's a sign on the wall
But she wants to be sure
'Cause you know sometimes words have two meanings.
In a tree by the brook
There's a songbird who sings,
Sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiven.
Ooh, it makes me wonder,
Ooh, it makes me wonder.
There's a feeling I get
When I look to the west,
And my spirit is crying for leaving.
In my thoughts I have seen
Rings of smoke through the trees,
And the voices of those who standing looking.
Ooh, it makes me wonder,
Ooh, it really makes me wonder.
And it's whispered that soon, If we all call the tune
Then the piper will lead us to reason.
And a new day will dawn
For those who stand long
And the forests will echo with laughter.
If there's a bustle in your hedgerow, Don't be alarmed
now,
It's just a spring clean for the May queen.
Yes, there are two paths you can go by
But in the long run
There's still time to change the road you're on.
And it makes me wonder.
Your head is humming and it won't go
In case you don't know,
The piper's calling you to join him,
Dear lady, can you hear the wind blow,
And did you know
Your stairway lies on the whispering wind.
And as we wind on down the road
Our shadows taller than our soul.
There walks a lady we all know
Who shines white light and wants to show
How ev'rything still turns to gold.
And if you listen very hard
The tune will come to you at last.
When all are one and one is all
To be a rock and not to roll.
And she's buying a stairway to heaven.
Driven pain sliced through her cramped hands, while
she struggled to stop their violent shaking.
Breathing became harder as the bone-numbing pain that
crippled her body flared through them, up her arms and
into her wrists. The sharp, penetrating agony sheared
into her very soul, leaving her gasping through silent
tears.
The determination to remain quiet became harder to
remember, impossible to carry out. The willpower that
made her a legend in the hospital fell away before the
lonely self-doubt and the realization of the true
seriousness of her body's betrayal.
The harsh, raking glare of the bright bathroom lights
blinded her tear-blurred eyes, making the nightmarish
pain seem even more unreal in her mind. The sobbing
gasp erupted from her hoarse throat when her sore hip
throbbed under her pale skin.
The water burst from the faucet, silent to her ears,
which could only hear the blood-pounding heat inside
her head. Convulsing hands dove into the freezing
water, while her whispered sobs pleaded for them to
cooperate with her.
She only had two more hours left on her shift, two
more hours to get through. Then they could do
whatever they wanted. But she had to get through
those two hours first.
The bang of the door slamming into the far wall
alerted her to another presence, giving her no time to
hide her struggles. Hands that refused to do what she
commanded splashed water onto her face to hide the
tears. Without looking, she snatched a paper towel
from the dispenser and occupied her hands with it,
hoping that whoever had barged into her sanctuary
wouldn't notice the uncontrollable shaking.
She risked looking up, and immediately regretted it,
as she found herself staring into Elizabeth's
unforgiving face. Their working relationship had been
shaky before, but now it wasn't even neutral.
The surgeon seemed to regard her coolly for a moment
before approaching the sink next to her. "You feeling
okay?"
"Fine."
"Really? It just seemed like you were distracted in
the M & M."
She clenched her jaw, throwing the soaked paper towel
into the nearby trash can, using the excuse to keep
her back to the surgeon. "I've just had a lot on my
mind."
"Oh? Trying to think of another way to get rid of
Mark?"
The cold tone of the other woman seemed to snap the
last restraint in her. The disappointment, fear, and
pain of the last seven months flooded lose as she spun
on the woman she'd always respected. "Not everything
around here is about you or your husband," she
snarled. "I am sorry that he had cancer, I am sorry
that he's had such a hard time adjusting, and I am
sorry that not everyone around here can cater to your
every whim and beck-and-call. I am even sorrier that
I had to have him evaluated, but I did what I had to
in order to ensure the safety of the patients and to
protect the hospital!" She took a step towards the
shocked surgeon, her entire body shaking from emotion.
"I did what I had to do to protect him, and if you
are too blinded by your feelings for him to see that,
then that's your problem, not mine."
She grimaced slightly at the fresh bout of pain that
shot through her hands. The toll of working in an
inner city ER was starting to hit her harder and
harder, and with everything else...
"Are you sure you're all right?"
She swallowed back the lump of tears threatening to
spill from her eyes. The icy exterior of the surgeon
had melted away, leaving the concerned compassionate
surgeon that she always admired. "I'm fine."
The surgeon took her hand, looking up at her closely
as a hiss of pain escaped her lips.
She tried to get her hand away, but Elizabeth held on
tightly, examining them. "I said I'm fine."
"Really?" Elizabeth stepped towards her, until she
could feel the heat radiating off the other woman's
body. "And I suppose that you're just overworked?"
Kerry moved back from the taller woman. The months
weighed on her soul in a burden that would stay with
her for the rest of her life. "I have to get back to
work."
She brushed past Elizabeth, hating the surgeon for the
cruelty of their relationship. Wanting to hate her
for having things so easy, but she didn't. Elizabeth
worked for her marriage, worked for her child, worked
for her husband's life.
While Kerry simply ran.
Kim could smell the blood from the OR as she entered
the exclusive hospital. The hospital was one of the
toughest, and most critical to the San Francisco area.
Yet, everyday that went by, the more out of place she
felt. The more she missed County, and the
short-tempered redhead that ran it.
But that was then and this was now. There was nothing
left for her there. Kerry had turned out to be the
very thing Kim would never have expected. She'd
turned her back on Kim when she'd needed her the most,
and then she'd wanted Kim to come running back as
though it had never happened.
It had happened, though. Kerry had betrayed her
friendship, her love, and her very morals. Now it was
a ghost that haunted her every night and every
morning. She couldn't even go on a date without the
memories of the redhead appearing in the front of her
mind, teasing her with creamy white skin and satin
sweat.
Standards that Kerry had risen, continued to rise,
forcing her to compare her current lover to Kerry.
The small woman with a large heart, who was a demon in
bed.
"Dr. Legaspi, I need you to sign off on Mrs. Baboo,
before we can take her in."
(** Ohh, that poor woman. I can imagine her growing
up, the other kids teasing her, calling her "My Sweet
Baboo!" Old 'Peanuts' joke. **)
She took the chart, scribbling her signature across it
with angry letters. She hated this place.
She slammed her clipboard onto the desk, sending a
large pile of charts spilling across the floor.
Ignoring the amused statement on the elderly nurse's
face, she bent over to pick them up guiltily.
Chart after chart, she slapped them onto a careless
pile. Her lanky form unfolded, so she could dump them
back onto the OR desk. The precarious pile slid over
it, leaving one chart glaring up at her.
WEAVER, KERRY.
"What the hell...?" She flipped the chart open, the
voice in her mind taunting her about breaking moral
and hospital policy. But the ex-lover in her needed to
know what was going on.
She scanned the chart hurriedly, noting absently that
the date of surgery was the day after she was fired.
The date of diagnosis... Her eyes snapped back to the
line, freezing at the implications of what it said.
"February..." Any anger she still had faded away into
a dizzy array of hurt and concern. Suddenly
everything made sense. Kerry's distance, how quiet
she'd been the last two weeks they were together, the
little problems she'd been having that Kerry had
brushed off as being the result of too much work.
"Oh Kerry, why didn't you tell me?"
Her heart pounded into her chest, through spot-soaked
eyes that wanted nothing more than the peace that
sleep would bring once more. The nights and days were
no longer distinguishable, running into each other in
a blur of pain and desperation.
The phone rang, and she ignored it like a neighbor's
radio played too loud.
All she wanted was to curl up in a dark corner and
stay there until she died. The relief of release
allowing her soul the paradise she craved. But then
again, the gods didn't seem to want to end her
suffering anytime soon.
BEEP! "Kerry, it's Elizabeth. I was wondering if we
could talk..."
"I bet you do." She shut off the answering machine,
not wanting to hear any of the messages that were on
there. Having to put up with Elizabeth's grudge at
work was bad enough without having to put up with it
at home.
Some slight degree of oblivion had begun to seep over
her when the phone rang again, yanking her violently
back to merciless consciousness. 'Damn it, Corday,
take a hint, would you please?'
She stared numbly at the ringing phone, trying to
decide whether to answer it or not. All she wanted to
do was to crawl into her large empty bed and pretend
for just a few minutes that there was nothing wrong in
her life.
The weariness in her body dragged her up the stairs
and into her bedroom. The darkness was a blanket of
comfort that slide over her pain ridden body,
engulfing her in a serene peace that she needed more
than anything else in the world.
Kim dropped the receiver back into the cradle and
leaned back in her chair. She hadn't answered the
phone. So either she was ignoring it, or something
had happened. The surgery could've missed something,
or her body had cramped up. Or maybe...
She sighed, dropping her head forward. This was
getting her nowhere fast. Besides, what would she
say? 'Hey Kerry, how are you? Oh and by the way, I
looked in your chart at Kennedy Hospital and know
everything.'
Her hand twitched over the phone unconsciously, a
decision itching at her mind, until she finally began
to dial. She had no choice in this.
"Hello, Don? Kim Legaspi. Is that job still open?"
Chapter: One/?
Rating: R
Pairings: KW/KL, Kerry Weaver, Elizabeth Corday
Genre: Drama
Spoilers: Up to and including season eight
Timeline: After Four Corners
Beta Reader: Scotty Welles
Summary: What if during Witch Hunt, and the
following Episodes it wasn't fear that kept Kerry
from helping Kim. What if there was something else
going on with her. What if Kim had no idea
about what that something was.
Disclaimer: Not mine. All characters belong to
Warner Bros and Michael Crichton.
Artist: Led Zeppelin
Title: Stairway To Heaven
There's a lady who's sure
All that glitters is gold
And she's buying a stairway to heaven.
When she gets there she knows
If the stores are all closed
With a word she can get what she came for.
Ooh, ooh, and she's buying a stairway to heaven.
There's a sign on the wall
But she wants to be sure
'Cause you know sometimes words have two meanings.
In a tree by the brook
There's a songbird who sings,
Sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiven.
Ooh, it makes me wonder,
Ooh, it makes me wonder.
There's a feeling I get
When I look to the west,
And my spirit is crying for leaving.
In my thoughts I have seen
Rings of smoke through the trees,
And the voices of those who standing looking.
Ooh, it makes me wonder,
Ooh, it really makes me wonder.
And it's whispered that soon, If we all call the tune
Then the piper will lead us to reason.
And a new day will dawn
For those who stand long
And the forests will echo with laughter.
If there's a bustle in your hedgerow, Don't be alarmed
now,
It's just a spring clean for the May queen.
Yes, there are two paths you can go by
But in the long run
There's still time to change the road you're on.
And it makes me wonder.
Your head is humming and it won't go
In case you don't know,
The piper's calling you to join him,
Dear lady, can you hear the wind blow,
And did you know
Your stairway lies on the whispering wind.
And as we wind on down the road
Our shadows taller than our soul.
There walks a lady we all know
Who shines white light and wants to show
How ev'rything still turns to gold.
And if you listen very hard
The tune will come to you at last.
When all are one and one is all
To be a rock and not to roll.
And she's buying a stairway to heaven.
Driven pain sliced through her cramped hands, while
she struggled to stop their violent shaking.
Breathing became harder as the bone-numbing pain that
crippled her body flared through them, up her arms and
into her wrists. The sharp, penetrating agony sheared
into her very soul, leaving her gasping through silent
tears.
The determination to remain quiet became harder to
remember, impossible to carry out. The willpower that
made her a legend in the hospital fell away before the
lonely self-doubt and the realization of the true
seriousness of her body's betrayal.
The harsh, raking glare of the bright bathroom lights
blinded her tear-blurred eyes, making the nightmarish
pain seem even more unreal in her mind. The sobbing
gasp erupted from her hoarse throat when her sore hip
throbbed under her pale skin.
The water burst from the faucet, silent to her ears,
which could only hear the blood-pounding heat inside
her head. Convulsing hands dove into the freezing
water, while her whispered sobs pleaded for them to
cooperate with her.
She only had two more hours left on her shift, two
more hours to get through. Then they could do
whatever they wanted. But she had to get through
those two hours first.
The bang of the door slamming into the far wall
alerted her to another presence, giving her no time to
hide her struggles. Hands that refused to do what she
commanded splashed water onto her face to hide the
tears. Without looking, she snatched a paper towel
from the dispenser and occupied her hands with it,
hoping that whoever had barged into her sanctuary
wouldn't notice the uncontrollable shaking.
She risked looking up, and immediately regretted it,
as she found herself staring into Elizabeth's
unforgiving face. Their working relationship had been
shaky before, but now it wasn't even neutral.
The surgeon seemed to regard her coolly for a moment
before approaching the sink next to her. "You feeling
okay?"
"Fine."
"Really? It just seemed like you were distracted in
the M & M."
She clenched her jaw, throwing the soaked paper towel
into the nearby trash can, using the excuse to keep
her back to the surgeon. "I've just had a lot on my
mind."
"Oh? Trying to think of another way to get rid of
Mark?"
The cold tone of the other woman seemed to snap the
last restraint in her. The disappointment, fear, and
pain of the last seven months flooded lose as she spun
on the woman she'd always respected. "Not everything
around here is about you or your husband," she
snarled. "I am sorry that he had cancer, I am sorry
that he's had such a hard time adjusting, and I am
sorry that not everyone around here can cater to your
every whim and beck-and-call. I am even sorrier that
I had to have him evaluated, but I did what I had to
in order to ensure the safety of the patients and to
protect the hospital!" She took a step towards the
shocked surgeon, her entire body shaking from emotion.
"I did what I had to do to protect him, and if you
are too blinded by your feelings for him to see that,
then that's your problem, not mine."
She grimaced slightly at the fresh bout of pain that
shot through her hands. The toll of working in an
inner city ER was starting to hit her harder and
harder, and with everything else...
"Are you sure you're all right?"
She swallowed back the lump of tears threatening to
spill from her eyes. The icy exterior of the surgeon
had melted away, leaving the concerned compassionate
surgeon that she always admired. "I'm fine."
The surgeon took her hand, looking up at her closely
as a hiss of pain escaped her lips.
She tried to get her hand away, but Elizabeth held on
tightly, examining them. "I said I'm fine."
"Really?" Elizabeth stepped towards her, until she
could feel the heat radiating off the other woman's
body. "And I suppose that you're just overworked?"
Kerry moved back from the taller woman. The months
weighed on her soul in a burden that would stay with
her for the rest of her life. "I have to get back to
work."
She brushed past Elizabeth, hating the surgeon for the
cruelty of their relationship. Wanting to hate her
for having things so easy, but she didn't. Elizabeth
worked for her marriage, worked for her child, worked
for her husband's life.
While Kerry simply ran.
Kim could smell the blood from the OR as she entered
the exclusive hospital. The hospital was one of the
toughest, and most critical to the San Francisco area.
Yet, everyday that went by, the more out of place she
felt. The more she missed County, and the
short-tempered redhead that ran it.
But that was then and this was now. There was nothing
left for her there. Kerry had turned out to be the
very thing Kim would never have expected. She'd
turned her back on Kim when she'd needed her the most,
and then she'd wanted Kim to come running back as
though it had never happened.
It had happened, though. Kerry had betrayed her
friendship, her love, and her very morals. Now it was
a ghost that haunted her every night and every
morning. She couldn't even go on a date without the
memories of the redhead appearing in the front of her
mind, teasing her with creamy white skin and satin
sweat.
Standards that Kerry had risen, continued to rise,
forcing her to compare her current lover to Kerry.
The small woman with a large heart, who was a demon in
bed.
"Dr. Legaspi, I need you to sign off on Mrs. Baboo,
before we can take her in."
(** Ohh, that poor woman. I can imagine her growing
up, the other kids teasing her, calling her "My Sweet
Baboo!" Old 'Peanuts' joke. **)
She took the chart, scribbling her signature across it
with angry letters. She hated this place.
She slammed her clipboard onto the desk, sending a
large pile of charts spilling across the floor.
Ignoring the amused statement on the elderly nurse's
face, she bent over to pick them up guiltily.
Chart after chart, she slapped them onto a careless
pile. Her lanky form unfolded, so she could dump them
back onto the OR desk. The precarious pile slid over
it, leaving one chart glaring up at her.
WEAVER, KERRY.
"What the hell...?" She flipped the chart open, the
voice in her mind taunting her about breaking moral
and hospital policy. But the ex-lover in her needed to
know what was going on.
She scanned the chart hurriedly, noting absently that
the date of surgery was the day after she was fired.
The date of diagnosis... Her eyes snapped back to the
line, freezing at the implications of what it said.
"February..." Any anger she still had faded away into
a dizzy array of hurt and concern. Suddenly
everything made sense. Kerry's distance, how quiet
she'd been the last two weeks they were together, the
little problems she'd been having that Kerry had
brushed off as being the result of too much work.
"Oh Kerry, why didn't you tell me?"
Her heart pounded into her chest, through spot-soaked
eyes that wanted nothing more than the peace that
sleep would bring once more. The nights and days were
no longer distinguishable, running into each other in
a blur of pain and desperation.
The phone rang, and she ignored it like a neighbor's
radio played too loud.
All she wanted was to curl up in a dark corner and
stay there until she died. The relief of release
allowing her soul the paradise she craved. But then
again, the gods didn't seem to want to end her
suffering anytime soon.
BEEP! "Kerry, it's Elizabeth. I was wondering if we
could talk..."
"I bet you do." She shut off the answering machine,
not wanting to hear any of the messages that were on
there. Having to put up with Elizabeth's grudge at
work was bad enough without having to put up with it
at home.
Some slight degree of oblivion had begun to seep over
her when the phone rang again, yanking her violently
back to merciless consciousness. 'Damn it, Corday,
take a hint, would you please?'
She stared numbly at the ringing phone, trying to
decide whether to answer it or not. All she wanted to
do was to crawl into her large empty bed and pretend
for just a few minutes that there was nothing wrong in
her life.
The weariness in her body dragged her up the stairs
and into her bedroom. The darkness was a blanket of
comfort that slide over her pain ridden body,
engulfing her in a serene peace that she needed more
than anything else in the world.
Kim dropped the receiver back into the cradle and
leaned back in her chair. She hadn't answered the
phone. So either she was ignoring it, or something
had happened. The surgery could've missed something,
or her body had cramped up. Or maybe...
She sighed, dropping her head forward. This was
getting her nowhere fast. Besides, what would she
say? 'Hey Kerry, how are you? Oh and by the way, I
looked in your chart at Kennedy Hospital and know
everything.'
Her hand twitched over the phone unconsciously, a
decision itching at her mind, until she finally began
to dial. She had no choice in this.
"Hello, Don? Kim Legaspi. Is that job still open?"
