7) In Which Miaka Meets Two Unwilling Actors
Miaka cautiously walked into the house. It was dark, and it took her a few minutes for her eyes to adjust. When they did, she saw the most beautifully decorated house that she had ever seen.
It was tastefully done in whites, with light green and purple splashes of color for accent. The furniture and carpeting were all new, and it was impeccably clean. Not a speck of dust could be found anywhere.
"Hello? Anybody here?"
Miaka walked from room to room, looking to see if anyone was home. It was unnaturally quiet.
"That doorgirl was wrong. There's nobody in this ho--"
Suddenly the sound of something being smashed and someone screaming (the author takes a minute to admire her well constructed sentence with alliteration in it) was heard from the kitchen.
"You can't make me, Nuriko!"
"I can't make you, but the author can! Please!"
"But I don't wanna!"
"Chiriko!"
The sound of a glass breaking followed the last voice. Miaka tiptoed to the closed kitchen door. A beam of light from beneath the door escaped into the darkness, as if it wanted to say, "Get me out of there!"
Miaka slowly opened the door. With one eye she saw a little kid who looked about six holding a scroll and yelling at someone. She opened the door a little further, and saw a hand throw a cup at the kid. The kid ducked, then ran behind a chair.
"I don't care if you don't want to do it! You have to! That's your only part in the story!"
"Why do I have to be the baby? I don't want to be the baby! Why can't Tasuki be the baby?"
"Because Tasuki doesn't look like he's six."
"But I'm twelve!"
"Well you look six!"
"But Tasuki acts like he's six!"
"The author wants you to be the baby!"
"I don't wanna turn into a pig!"
The throwing of things had ceased for the time being, so Miaka opened the door all the way. Standing on the other side of the room was a woman with clenched fists. She had long purple hair pulled into one braid.
The kitchen (if you could call it that) looked like a battle zone. Where the other rooms had new matching furniture and wallpaper, this room looked twenty years old. The yellowing wallpaper was peeling away from the walls, and the avocado green paint had flecked away in some spots. Cupboards and drawers were open and all their contents were on the floor. Most were broken. A few plates and dishes were whole, but they lay right next to the woman's hand, in case she needed to throw something.
Miaka opened the door, and the room became silent. The woman and the kid looked at the intruder .
"Who are you?" the purple haired woman asked.
"Ummmm... I'm Miaka. I'm not bothering you, am I?"
(The author takes time to laugh and hope that maybe Nuriko will hit Miaka with a sharp plate.)
"We were kind of in the middle of something, girlie-girl."
The kid ran over to Miaka, grabbed her arm and pulled her into the battle field. "No, no! Stay! You're not bothering me!" he said as he hid behind her.
Miaka swallowed her fear, and asked a question that had been pestering her since she had walked in the house.
"Why are you guys fighting?" she asked.
The woman sighed and sat down on a chair. "We're part of a story, and the author wants Chiriko here ("That's me," Chiriko whispered to Miaka.) to play the part of the baby."
"But what Nuriko didn't tell you was that the baby has to turn into a pig! I don't wanna be a pig!"
Miaka gasped. "You're Nuriko?"
Nuriko flashed a smile and brushed a stray hair out of his eyes. "The one and the only."
"But you're a man, right?" Nuriko nodded.
"I thought you were a woman!"
"People are always getting confused. That's because I'm so beautiful."
"And some of Hotohori's vanity rubbed off onto him, too." Chiriko muttered.
Nuriko growled and threw a plate. Miaka and Chiriko ducked. Chiriko ran over and whapped Nuriko on the head with his scroll, then ran back to the chair he was first hiding behind. Miaka ran to a corner of the room, hopefully getting away from the flying objects.
"CHIRIKO!"
"I refuse to play the part!"
More things flew across the room. The sounds of things smashing and people yelling continued. Miaka's face went into SD form, and a large teardrop covered her eyes and obscured her vision.
"It's pretty bad, no da."
"What?" Miaka wiped the teardrop away and jumped when she saw a little man in SD form sitting beside her.
"The author's going to be really peeved, no da."
Miaka stared at the man. He had light blue hair cut into a weird style, and was wearing a mask. He held a conical hat in one hand.
"Who are you?" Miaka asked.
"Oh, I'm Chichiri, no da."
Miaka opened her mouth to say something, but was cut off by the blue haired man.
"She's coming, no da!"
"Who's coming?"
Nuriko and Chiriko froze. Nuriko picked up a pepper shaker and hurriedly sprinkled pepper in the room. Chiriko started sneezing. Nuriko then rushed over to Chiriko and shook the pepper shaker over his head.
"Who's coming?" Miaka wailed, annoyed because no one paid any attention to her. "And why are you doing--"
The kitchen door banged open. In walked the doorgirl, holding the envelope.
"Not yet. I've sprayed tons of pepper on him, but Chiriko just doesn't turn into a pig." Nuriko said, his voice shaking.
"I see." the girl replied. Chiriko sneezed.
"Oh well," the girl said, smiling. "Nevermind about the pepper thing anymore." Nuriko and Chiriko visibly relaxed.
"Really? I don't have to turn into a pig anymore?" Chiriko asked.
"Nope."
Nuriko pointed to the envelope. "What's that?"
" An invitation from Him. To play whips." The girl handed the envelope to Nuriko.
"Where's Chichiri?" she asked, looking around.
"He's right here." Miaka said, and pointed back behind her. She turned and jumped. A blue cat with a wide grin now sat beside her. She looked closely and saw that it was Chichiri, but in cat form.
The girl nodded in satisfaction at what she saw, then turned and left.
"Well, I should be going now, no da."
Miaka turned back to Chichiri and found that he had turned back into his human form. He raised his hat above him, then lowered it, disappearing into it.
"Now who's gonna clean up the mess, eh Chiriko?" Nuriko asked as he eyed their surroundings.
"Not me!"
"But I didn't make such a mess!" Nuriko said, his voice going a couple octaves too high.
"Yes, you did!" Chiriko whapped Nuriko on the head again with his scroll.
"Why you little..."
Miaka quietly slipped out the door and made her way quickly out of the house. Hopefully they wouldn't see her and ask her to help clean up. And maybe she could talk to that doorgirl again.
Miaka exited the mansion, but the girl was gone.
"Now where do I go?" Miaka thought. Seeing the path that the girl Katey had used, Miaka took her chances and decided to follow it.
"Maybe I'll find Tamahome," she said as she skipped down the path.
