Part Two...
In the 35 years she had lived there were few occasions
that seemed to slow down for her, every sound drawn
out and sharper. Each movement more precise, each
detail clear in her mind. One of those occasions was
when there was a trauma, it was what made her so good
at her job. The others were times of extreme joy or
pain, sadness or loss.
The old shaman used to say that it was because she was
tapped into the world around her. She'd laughed not
believing him, at least she hadn't until she'd lost
Alex. Alex had been her heart and soul, the one pure
thing to come from such a horrible mistake.
"Ma'am..."
Kerry scanned the ER's hallway covered with police and
FBI agents. Her eyes came to rest on the handcuffed
woman sitting in a chair across from a small girl of
mixed heritage. The woman's head was bowed, long
black hair hanging over her face.
The woman lifted her head slowly, staring right at
her. Kerry wasn't sure what she expected to see in
her eyes. Regret, sadness, guilt?
She had been Kerry's other half, the one person she
could trust. Punching out Kerry's boyfriend in the
middle of the prom after catching him with another
woman. Staying up with her until 3 am eating bad
Chinese food and crashing for mid terms. Never
leaving her side the weeks she spent in the hospital,
supporting her through her marriage to Abasi, and her
pregnancy with Alex. Yet all that was in her dark
eyes was accusation, and blind rage.
An older police officer yanked her to her feet,
pushing her down the hall. Kerry let their eyes meet
momentarily; this woman was a stranger. No longer
allowed to call herself friend or sister. They had
both been through too much, had changed from the
once-careless teenagers.
She felt a strong hand come to rest possessively on
the small of her back. Glancing up she saw the tight
lines of barely suppressed anger etched across John's
face. She paused, turning to finally look at the
reason she was there.
A young woman was softly talking to the abnormally
small four-year-old. The girl was staring at the wall
with gray eyes in silence. Her small body was badly
bruised, her left arm in a cast. The woman was
probably a social worker, trying to explain everything
to the girl.
The piercing gray eyes turned to look at her as the
social worker pointed. "...mother..."
Kerry moved closer, unsure what to do or what she
could possibly say to the child. 'It's over, at least
for now... Just because I couldn't protect you four
years ago doesn't mean I won't be able to protect you
now... I've been looking for you for four years, but I
was unable to find you... She dug into her heart,
searching for guidance and only finding years of blame
and guilt.
"Dr. Weaver..."
Kerry tore her eyes away from her daughter as Agent
Henderson spoke softly. "Your ex is in SICU...he was
holding the receiver of a phone and my partner mistook
it for a gun..."
Kerry glanced over at his partner. The woman glanced
at Kerry, her eyes telling her everything she wanted
to know. I knew it was a phone. The judge, my
superior, my partner knew it was just a phone, but
they will never say otherwise... I'm sorry I missed...
"Your daughter's already been discharged; you can take
her home..."
Kerry had waited years to be told that, and now that
it had finally happened she felt one burden lift, only
to be replaced by another. She slowly walked toward
the small girl, not sure what to expect.
Alex struggled off the chair, unable to get off.
Kerry could see the exhaustion and pain of the last
few years in the small girls eyes. Reaching down, she
picked the girl up into her arms, and started to walk
away. John met her eyes, both of them having seen the
girl flinch in fear.
A young intern approached them stopping in their path.
"Ma'am, the surgeon just called; they don't expect
your husband to make it through the night..."
Kerry pushed past her, out into the snow-covered
night. "Good."
John opened the passenger door for her, silently
echoing her sentiments. If her ex survived, John
would personally rip him apart for doing this to
Kerry's daughter.
Kerry settled Alex in the back seat, noticing her
daughter cower when the car light blinked off. Kerry
climbed into the back with her, keeping her arm around
the girl. John shut the passenger door, walking
slowly around to the driver's side. He didn't want
Alex to see how angry he was; that was the last thing
she needed right now.
Getting in, he faced the facts. His feeling's for
Kerry was making his normally strong morals go into
overdrive, and it was wreaking havoc with his
emotions.
Kerry turned on the light to her closet, reaching for
the box of night lights. Pulling two out, she
accidentally knocked something to the floor. Sighing,
she bent over and picked up the Tigger doll. It had
been one of the few items she'd kept after Abasi had
kidnapped her daughter.
She had never been sure why she'd kept it. She only
knew that it gave her hope, some days it had been the
only thing that kept her going. Some days she'd put
it in her purse, keeping it close, a reminder of what
she lost. Christmas, she would curl up on the sofa
with it doing nothing.
Closing the door, she limped to the guest room,
pausing inside the door. John was talking animatedly
to the unresponsive girl. Seeing her, John hopped up
from the foot of the bed, taking the night lights.
Kerry smiled at his enthusiasm before turning her
attention back to Alex.
Kerry sat on the side of the bed, handing the doll to
her.
Alex reached out a hesitant hand, touching the soft
doll. She glanced up at Kerry with questioning eyes,
jerking her hand away abruptly.
"He's been waiting for you to come home." Kerry
pulled the heavy covers back, placing the doll into
Alex's arms.
Alex snuggled down into the pillows, hugging the doll
tightly to her as Kerry tucked her in.
"If you need anything, just let me know, okay?"
Alex didn't respond, distrust written across her face.
Sighing heavily, Kerry kissed her and walked to the
door. "Good night..." Kerry left the door cracked
open, and walked downstairs. Collapsing on the sofa,
she took the glass of wine that John offered her.
"How is she?"
Kerry glared at him, all the emotions of the day
hitting her hard. "Scared, in pain..."
"How on earth did you ever end up with someone like
that?"
Kerry refused to meet his eyes; that was one of the
few questions she hated.
"I was gullible and stupid."
John knew better than to push her. "We'll need to
take her shopping tomorrow..."
"We?"
John colored slightly under her amused gaze. "You'll
need help."
Kerry cocked an eyebrow, but didn't question him
further. She had always suspected that
John had a slight crush on her, and tonight had done
nothing to appease her suspicions...
Kerry finished pulling on her pajamas and limped out
of the bathroom. Stopping in the doorway, her eyes
scanned the room. Something was wrong, the door had
been closed when she'd gone in to shower, now it was
cracked open. Not to mention the small bulge under
her covers.
Only two things could cause that and one of them had
been asleep in front of the fireplace.
Walking over she pulled the covers down staring at the
cause. The four-year-old bundle peeked up at her with
huge puppy dog eyes.
Alex tried to jerk away as Kerry suddenly scooped her
up and laid her down on the left side of the bed,
tucking her in. Alex relaxed visibly, watching Kerry
turn the bathroom light on, leaving the door cracked.
Shutting the bedroom door, Kerry finally climbed in,
resigning herself to a long night.
In the 35 years she had lived there were few occasions
that seemed to slow down for her, every sound drawn
out and sharper. Each movement more precise, each
detail clear in her mind. One of those occasions was
when there was a trauma, it was what made her so good
at her job. The others were times of extreme joy or
pain, sadness or loss.
The old shaman used to say that it was because she was
tapped into the world around her. She'd laughed not
believing him, at least she hadn't until she'd lost
Alex. Alex had been her heart and soul, the one pure
thing to come from such a horrible mistake.
"Ma'am..."
Kerry scanned the ER's hallway covered with police and
FBI agents. Her eyes came to rest on the handcuffed
woman sitting in a chair across from a small girl of
mixed heritage. The woman's head was bowed, long
black hair hanging over her face.
The woman lifted her head slowly, staring right at
her. Kerry wasn't sure what she expected to see in
her eyes. Regret, sadness, guilt?
She had been Kerry's other half, the one person she
could trust. Punching out Kerry's boyfriend in the
middle of the prom after catching him with another
woman. Staying up with her until 3 am eating bad
Chinese food and crashing for mid terms. Never
leaving her side the weeks she spent in the hospital,
supporting her through her marriage to Abasi, and her
pregnancy with Alex. Yet all that was in her dark
eyes was accusation, and blind rage.
An older police officer yanked her to her feet,
pushing her down the hall. Kerry let their eyes meet
momentarily; this woman was a stranger. No longer
allowed to call herself friend or sister. They had
both been through too much, had changed from the
once-careless teenagers.
She felt a strong hand come to rest possessively on
the small of her back. Glancing up she saw the tight
lines of barely suppressed anger etched across John's
face. She paused, turning to finally look at the
reason she was there.
A young woman was softly talking to the abnormally
small four-year-old. The girl was staring at the wall
with gray eyes in silence. Her small body was badly
bruised, her left arm in a cast. The woman was
probably a social worker, trying to explain everything
to the girl.
The piercing gray eyes turned to look at her as the
social worker pointed. "...mother..."
Kerry moved closer, unsure what to do or what she
could possibly say to the child. 'It's over, at least
for now... Just because I couldn't protect you four
years ago doesn't mean I won't be able to protect you
now... I've been looking for you for four years, but I
was unable to find you... She dug into her heart,
searching for guidance and only finding years of blame
and guilt.
"Dr. Weaver..."
Kerry tore her eyes away from her daughter as Agent
Henderson spoke softly. "Your ex is in SICU...he was
holding the receiver of a phone and my partner mistook
it for a gun..."
Kerry glanced over at his partner. The woman glanced
at Kerry, her eyes telling her everything she wanted
to know. I knew it was a phone. The judge, my
superior, my partner knew it was just a phone, but
they will never say otherwise... I'm sorry I missed...
"Your daughter's already been discharged; you can take
her home..."
Kerry had waited years to be told that, and now that
it had finally happened she felt one burden lift, only
to be replaced by another. She slowly walked toward
the small girl, not sure what to expect.
Alex struggled off the chair, unable to get off.
Kerry could see the exhaustion and pain of the last
few years in the small girls eyes. Reaching down, she
picked the girl up into her arms, and started to walk
away. John met her eyes, both of them having seen the
girl flinch in fear.
A young intern approached them stopping in their path.
"Ma'am, the surgeon just called; they don't expect
your husband to make it through the night..."
Kerry pushed past her, out into the snow-covered
night. "Good."
John opened the passenger door for her, silently
echoing her sentiments. If her ex survived, John
would personally rip him apart for doing this to
Kerry's daughter.
Kerry settled Alex in the back seat, noticing her
daughter cower when the car light blinked off. Kerry
climbed into the back with her, keeping her arm around
the girl. John shut the passenger door, walking
slowly around to the driver's side. He didn't want
Alex to see how angry he was; that was the last thing
she needed right now.
Getting in, he faced the facts. His feeling's for
Kerry was making his normally strong morals go into
overdrive, and it was wreaking havoc with his
emotions.
Kerry turned on the light to her closet, reaching for
the box of night lights. Pulling two out, she
accidentally knocked something to the floor. Sighing,
she bent over and picked up the Tigger doll. It had
been one of the few items she'd kept after Abasi had
kidnapped her daughter.
She had never been sure why she'd kept it. She only
knew that it gave her hope, some days it had been the
only thing that kept her going. Some days she'd put
it in her purse, keeping it close, a reminder of what
she lost. Christmas, she would curl up on the sofa
with it doing nothing.
Closing the door, she limped to the guest room,
pausing inside the door. John was talking animatedly
to the unresponsive girl. Seeing her, John hopped up
from the foot of the bed, taking the night lights.
Kerry smiled at his enthusiasm before turning her
attention back to Alex.
Kerry sat on the side of the bed, handing the doll to
her.
Alex reached out a hesitant hand, touching the soft
doll. She glanced up at Kerry with questioning eyes,
jerking her hand away abruptly.
"He's been waiting for you to come home." Kerry
pulled the heavy covers back, placing the doll into
Alex's arms.
Alex snuggled down into the pillows, hugging the doll
tightly to her as Kerry tucked her in.
"If you need anything, just let me know, okay?"
Alex didn't respond, distrust written across her face.
Sighing heavily, Kerry kissed her and walked to the
door. "Good night..." Kerry left the door cracked
open, and walked downstairs. Collapsing on the sofa,
she took the glass of wine that John offered her.
"How is she?"
Kerry glared at him, all the emotions of the day
hitting her hard. "Scared, in pain..."
"How on earth did you ever end up with someone like
that?"
Kerry refused to meet his eyes; that was one of the
few questions she hated.
"I was gullible and stupid."
John knew better than to push her. "We'll need to
take her shopping tomorrow..."
"We?"
John colored slightly under her amused gaze. "You'll
need help."
Kerry cocked an eyebrow, but didn't question him
further. She had always suspected that
John had a slight crush on her, and tonight had done
nothing to appease her suspicions...
Kerry finished pulling on her pajamas and limped out
of the bathroom. Stopping in the doorway, her eyes
scanned the room. Something was wrong, the door had
been closed when she'd gone in to shower, now it was
cracked open. Not to mention the small bulge under
her covers.
Only two things could cause that and one of them had
been asleep in front of the fireplace.
Walking over she pulled the covers down staring at the
cause. The four-year-old bundle peeked up at her with
huge puppy dog eyes.
Alex tried to jerk away as Kerry suddenly scooped her
up and laid her down on the left side of the bed,
tucking her in. Alex relaxed visibly, watching Kerry
turn the bathroom light on, leaving the door cracked.
Shutting the bedroom door, Kerry finally climbed in,
resigning herself to a long night.
