Baby Sitting Chronicles: Don't Eat the Green Potato Chip.

Ting-a-ling ting-a-ling.....ting-a-ling..

Rei's head snapped up and her crimson eyes frightfully looked side to side. That sound... it could only mean one thing.

Mr. Fluffy.

That awful, hideous cat!

Mr. Fluffy was some type of rare breed of cat that was pure white, had very long, soft, fluffy fur, and no tail. The cat belonged to the Tomita's, who was one of Rei's neighbors. When the little girl was younger, around the age of two, she used to play with the cat often. She loved Mr. Fluffy, and she very much wanted to keep him for herself. It wasn't until the cat licked her face, did she change her mind and her desire to keep him. However, having her face licked by the cat wasn't what made her have an unnatural fear of the furry beast. It was the painful rash that developed on her milky white skin that did it. It turned out that Rei was severely allergic to the enzymes in cat saliva. The little blue haired girl was allergic to a lot of things. Most of which involved animals in some way, whether it was being around them or eating meat.

Shinji heard Mr. Fluffy's bell too, and he looked side to side for the cat. If he saw it, he would make sure that it stayed away from Rei. He was determined to protect her.

Rei, on the other hand, didn't have that much faith in Shinji's protection, so she was about to have a panic attack. She was trapped in the baby swing, and if Mr. Fluffy wanted to, he could jump right into her lap and lick her face and she wouldn't be able to get away. She needed to get out of there, and she needed to get out now!

~~~~~~~~~

When Rei stood up in the swing, Ritsuko relaxed and returned her attention back to her friends. The blond teen wasn't aware of the little girl's distress. She thought that Shinji must have refused to push her, so she was trying to swing herself.

"So Rit-chan what did your mom say when she saw your hair?" Kaji asked totally interested. He was sure that her mom must have freaked out when Ritsuko bleached her naturally brown hair.

"Are you kidding!" The teenaged Akagi sighed dramatically. "I thought she was going to kill me!"

Misato ran her fingers through her friends short, silky locks. "It looks nice though. Natural even."

"It didn't after I bleached it!" Ritsuko groaned as she raked both hands through her hair. "It was totally damaged. Mom had to call the salon and make an emergency appointment with Pierre!"

"No way!" Misato yelled clearly impressed. "It took me a whole month to get a hair appointment with him! How'd she do it?"

Kaji rolled his eyes and started to dig in the book bag for some candy. Now that the girls were talking about hair and not about punishments, he was bored with their conversation.

~~~~~~~

Asuka had almost caught up with the elder Suzuhara twin. A few more inches and she could grab the back of his shirt. "Almost gotcha!"

Ting-a- ling....ting-a ling.....ting-a-ling...

With the faint sound of a cat bell, the reason for the case was immediately forgotten. All five children stopped dead in their tracks and started to look in different directions.

They heard the bell so they knew that Mr. Fluffy was around. They also knew that Mr. Fluffy was looking for Rei. That cat always searched out Rei when it was let out of the house. No matter where the little girl was, Mr. Fluffy would find her. However, the little chibbi's were not going to let the cat get to Rei. The little blue haired girl was the baby of the group, so they all felt the need to protect her.

"I see him!" Hikari screeched as she pointed toward the white fur ball at the other end of the grass field.

Kaworu ran at full sprint toward the cat. He wasn't allergic to cat spit, so he wasn't afraid. Mr. Fluffy saw the little sliverish haired sailor coming toward him and changed directions. Touji and Asuka were not far behind Kaworu and quickly adjusted their direction to follow the furry trouble maker.

Hikari and Kensuke ran back toward the swings just in case the cat got passed the three fastest runners. The cat usually did get passed them.

~~~~~~~~~~

Rei watched Hikari and Kensuke run toward her. With a shift of her gaze, she saw the cat run right through brothers legs and right past Asuka and Touji. The little girl's heart started to pound painfully with each step the cat took toward her.

Shinji watched Rei tilt her head back and take a deep breath. He quickly covered his ears; he knew what was coming next.

~~~~~~~~~~

Kaji almost choked on the Jolly Rancher he was eating when he heard Rei's eardrum shattering, terror stricken scream.

"Crap!" Ritsuko hissed and ran toward the little girl. She knew exactly what *that* scream meant. "Damn that cat!"

Kaji and Misato quickly followed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When cat passed Hikari and then Kensuke, Rei decided to make a run for it. But first, she had to get out of the baby swing.

Shinji barely had enough time to uncover his ears before he saw the blue haired girl fall directly on top of him.

"Oof"

Shinji was laying flat on his back, and his breath was completely knocked out of him because the youngest Ayanami used him to soften her fall. However, the young girl didn't come out complete unscathed either. Her breath was knocked out of her as well. So with the lack of oxygen, she couldn't get her body to cooperate and get up.

In a dazed state, Shinji laid in the sand, with Rei on top of him. "Would you please get up now?" He managed out in a shaky whisper.

With much effort, the little girl peeled herself into a sitting position , only to see Mr. Fluffy pounce toward her. Immediately, Rei brought her hands and her head back down in order to protect her skin from the cats tongue.

"Gotcha!" Misato chimed after she caught the troublesome cat in mid air.

Shinji's dark blue eyes quadrupled in size as he stared directly into to Rei's crimson ones. Rei had hid her hands and face against HIS face!! Rei had her hand, her LEFT hand on HIS face! Rei had her left hand, the one that was connected to her thumb, on HIS face!!. The same pink, wet, slightly swollen, wrinkled up like a raisin thumb that has always been in *her* MOUTH since she was a real baby, on HIS face! No correction. ON *HIS* MOUTH!

Both Rei and Shinji seemed to realize this fact at the same time, and they both had the same reaction.

They screamed. LOUD.

~~~~~~~

Ritsuko and Kaji carried the two highly distraught chibbi's toward the Ayanami's house. The court in which the two siblings lived was closer to the park than Shinji's house. Also, When they all arrived at the Ayanami's home, all Kaji would have to do to take Shinji home was walk through the Ayanami's backyard. The Ikari's and the Ayanamis lived directly behind each other. It was just one of the many blessings of suburbia, to be able to look out of your backdoor and see right into your neighbor's backyard, and inside of their house and vice versa (insert sarcasm)

Rei, Kaworu, Asuka and Hikari lived in the same cove-sack. The Sorhyu's lived directly across the street from the Ayanami's, and the Hiroki's lived right beside the Sorhyu's. Shinji lived in the same cove-sack as the Suzuhara twins. But if you didn't go through the backyards, the two courts were really far apart. It was only by chance, and the lack of privacy, did the Ayanami family and the Ikari family become friends.

Rei had not stopped wailing since her thumb grazed Shinji mouth. She just knew that her thumb, her FAVORITE thumb was ruined!! It was spoiled by Shinji's cootie germs! The little girl looked through blurry eyes, at her wrinkled thumb. She tried to stretch her arm even more to get it away from her. She was acting as if her thumb was covered with the plague or something worse. It was Ruined!! Rei opened her mouth and once again made that ear piercing wail as she started to lean back to throw another temper tantrum.

"Oh my Gawd!" Ritsuko screamed as the little blue hair girl slipped from her grasp and started to fall backwards, and head first toward the ground.

Luckily, Misato was able to grab the girl by the ankles before she cracked her skull on the ground. The little toddler's head was so close to the ground that her short, light blue, locks brushed the cement sidewalk.

The purple haired teenager stared angrily at the Rei. So consumed in her tantrum, the little girl didn't even realize the kind of danger she just put herself in. "Rei-chan, if you don't calm down, you're going to give yourself something to really cry about!"

Rei didn't stop crying as Misato put her right side up. Shinji didn't stop crying either. Not only was the little boy terrified that he was now infected, Kaji had trapped his little hands in his large one. The teen had to, the little brown haired boy was rubbing his lips raw. Also, Shinji had refused to allow another girl to touch him, so as far as he was concerned Misato was no longer his babysitter. Kaji was now his new, temporary, guardian and that's why it was the teenaged boy who was caring him back to his house.

Misato took Rei away from Ritsuko and tugged on the little girl's hand to force her to keep pace. At first, Rei tried to refuse to walk, but Misato dragged her and forced her to walk until she complied.

Ritsuko shifted her gaze back and forth between the distraught, blue haired toddler and the brown haired little boy. "What's going on? Why are they so upset?"

"Because they have cooties!" Kensuke volunteered. His is were wide as he stared at his sobbing friends. He felt really bad for them.

"Yeah, they have cooties!" Touji confirmed, then added. "And now they are going to get sores on their lips!"

"Poor Rei-chan.." Hikari sobbed as she nodded in agreement to Touji's words. "Poor, poor Rei-chan!"

"What?" The three teens asked in almost perfect unison. That was the most ridiculous thing they've ever heard.

"Why would they get sores on their lips?" Misato groaned as she finally picked up the purposely lagging, and highly distraught, Rei. She placed the little girl on her hip and quickened her pace to catch up with Kaji.

"Because they have cooties!" Asuka rolled her eyes and gave her rival a "duh" expression.

Just the mention of cooties made Shinji wail "I want my MOOOOOOMMY!!" right before he roughly wiped his mouth on Kaji's shoulder.

Kaworu walked very closely to Misato. He kept his crimson eyes trained worriedly on his little sister as he nervously fiddled with her tam-o-shanter. She looked so sad. He just hoped that cooties weren't as painful as Saionji said they were.

"Will someone PLEASE tell me WHY Shinji and Rei think they have cooties! And WHY it will give them sores on their mouth!" Misato yelled. She was really tired of all the kids fear of the dreaded gender germ. She didn't understand why they even felt that way. All the kids were practically friends from the day they were born. She knew for a fact that Kaworu visited the hospital the day Asuka was born. Asuka and Kaworu was there for Shinji's birth, and all three, as well as Hikari and the twins were there for Rei's birth. Moreover, they never had a problem playing together before.... so why now?

"I'll tell you!" Asuka volunteered and skipped until she was in front of Misato. Walking backwards, so she could see the people behind her, she held up two tiny fingers and she began with her tale. "Once upon a time... about two weeks ago....."

::Flashback::

In the playroom of the Hiroki house, Asuka, Rei and Hikari were playing Eva Angels with their favorite dolls. Eva Angels was a spin off from the popular show Eva Rangers. But instead of all the fighter being boys, the Eva Angels were all girls.

Asuka's doll was a red haired Barbie that was dressed in the Red Eva Ranger action figure's clothes. She knew that the Red Eva Ranger was really a boy, but that mattered not to the young girl. She *liked* the color red and *that* was all that mattered. But the real reason her doll had on an Eva Ranger uniform was because there was no Eva Angel Red, there was only an Eva Angel *Pink*. So, with a little cross dressing of her dolls, the young girl easily corrected the original creators mistake.

Hikari had a brunette haired Barbie, but its hair was cut to the shoulders. So the dolls artificial hair kinda stuck up in the air, in all directions. The little girl had to learn the hard way that Barbie's hair were not meant to be cut. But it was still her favorite doll, and the one she played with the most out of all her others as Eva Angel Green.

Rei didn't have a Barbie doll. Her mommy couldn't find a Barbie that represented Rei's uniqueness. So instead, the little girl had a Barbie sized Tsunami doll, from the TV show Tenchi. Her doll was always Eva Angel White.

The three girls played for about an hour before Hikari's older sister remembered to check on them. She was such an incompetent babysitter.

"Squirt, are you getting into any trouble?" The tall dark haired girl asked half heartedly as she poked her head through the double doors.

Without looking away from where her doll rested inside the pool of the pink Malibu Mansion, Hikari answered "Nope!"

Asuka turned toward the teen. She wanted to know if she could get some juice. She was thirsty and only Gawd knew when the girl would come back and check on them again. When she turned around to request her beverage, what came out was. "What happened to your mouth?"

Hikari's oneesan's tongue immediately licked the large blister at the corner of her mouth. "Owwww"

Her groan got Rei's attention away the remote controlled pink Porsche, which held her doll. One handedly, the little blue haired girl was skillfully maneuvering the car through the legs of the expensive coffee table and to a safe stop. She looked up at he older girl, furrowed her brow in disgust and softly said behind her thumb. "ewww"

Hikari turned to look as well. She had already seen the sores on her sister's mouth, but since everyone else was looking, the bright red blisters started to look interesting again.

"It's a cold sore." The girl answered with a slight speech impediment, due to the fact that she tried not to move her aching lips while talking.

Hikari reminded innocently." I thought you said it was a fever bl--blis--?"

"Blister." Her sister finished. She didn't have the patience for her sister to remember the word. "It is."

"But fevers are hot..." Asuka informed and narrowed her crystal blue eyes. Her genius little mind was assimilating the formation and something wasn't coming out right. "How can you get a sore that is cold from a fever?"

With her thumb in her mouth, Rei looked from Asuka to the older girl expectantly. In Rei's opinion, that was a good question. Asuka always had good questions. Rei asked her daddy about that, and he said that it was because her friend's thought patterns processed information faster than the average person. It made sense to Rei; even though she didn't understand it.

"Trust me..." The teen said haughtily. "This sore is not cold. It burns like heck!" She unconsciously licked at it again. "Anyway they're the same thing."

"Oh" Asuka said stumped. She didn't entirely believe the girl but she couldn't prove that she was wrong. She was going to ask her mom about it later. "So you got it when you were sick?"

The teen rolled her eyes kids, they don't know anything "No I wasn't sick!"

"But you had a fever?" Rei reminded softly.

"No..." She sighed. "I *have* a _fever _blister!"

"But you said it was a cold sore!" Hikari reminded again.

"Ugh!!" The teen yelled as she threw her hands in the air. sometimes these kids can be soooo thick!

"How did you get that cold blister?" Asuka asked with genuine interest. It looked really painfull.

At this point, the dark haired teen was so fed up with the three little girls, she told the truth. "I'm not sure how I got it, but my boyfriend has one too. And I know *I've* never had one before.... so maybe you should ask him!!" She angry spun on her heals and stomped down the long hallway to avoid anymore questions from the trio.

Hikari rolled her eyes when her sister left and went back to playing with her dolly, as so did Rei. The teen's confession didn't make sense to them ,so they didn't worry to much about it.

Asuka, on the other hand, hated when things confused her. So she pondered on the girls words until...

"Hey! Do you know what she just said?!"

"Who?" Hikari asked innocently as she tuned to face her friend.

Asuka crawled over toward her two friends and sat right in between Rei and Hikari. "Your sister!"

Slightly muffled by her thumb, Rei answered. "She said.... she got a hot sore from a cold."

"_No_" The little red haired girl corrected adamantly. "She didn't say that. She *said* that she got that hot sore _from_ a_ BOY!!!"

:: end of flash back::

"That is NOT what happened?!!" Touji interrupted Asuka's interpretation, venomously. "Boys do NOT have cooties!"

"Is so what happened!" Asuka yelled back.

"Is not!" Touji and Kensuke yelled together.

"Is SO!" Asuka and Hikari yelled back, twice as loud.

"IS NOT!!" All the boys, including Shinji, excluding Kaji, yelled in unison.

"Then what happened?" Ritsuko asked with calm neutrality. She pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed heavily; she was beginning to understand what was going on.

Touji and Kensuke were engaged in a glaring contest with Asuka and Hikari, so Kaworu volunteered to tell his version of the story.

"It all started a little over two weeks ago..." He informed calmly.

::Flashback::

Kaworu, Shinji, Touji and Kensuke were playing Eva Rangers in the Suzuhara front yard.

"I am EVA PURPLE!" Shinji yelled as he posed in the Karate Kid crane position. "I will NOT allow EVIL to go unpunished!"

"We are Eva's Orange and Blue!" Touji and Kensuke yelled as they pressed their hands together in a London bridge position. "Twins of Justice and defender's for Evil!"

"*Of* Evil" Kaworu correct. "If you where defending *for* evil you would be the bad guy!"

"Oh yeah!" The twins said in unison. "Forgot again, gomen!"

"I am Eva Black!" Kaworu yelled and posed with his legs speed wide and his arms in the air like a V "I will fight for Victory and WIN!!"

"And together..." The boys yelled "We are the EVA RANGERS!!!"

"Will you little idiots, SHUT UP!!"

All the boys fell out of their poses, and looked at the disgruntled teen neighbor. The boy had long flowing, emerald green hair, and he was sitting on his front porch and was gesturing to the phone he was talking on.

"I can't hear with you yelling like dorks!"

"We're not dorks!" Touji yelled back. "We're Eva Rangers!"

"Same difference!" The boy shot back and turned slightly so his back was now facing them.

The kids knew this boy well. He was the meanest kid in the whole neighborhood and probably the whole world! No one new his first name, so everyone just addressed him by his last name. Saionji. He was also Hikari's sister's boyfriend.

"I feel eeeevil close by!" Kaworu whispered loudly in his best Eva Black voice. He pointed at unpleasant teen to make his point.

The other little boys nodded in agreement as they covered their mouth with there hands and giggled.

"Eva Purple!" Touji ordered. "Go attack the green monster. I will back you up!"

"And I will back you up, Eva Blue!" Kensuke promised his brother.

"*I'm* not going over there!" Shinji squeaked out as he pointed frantically at the meanest boy in the whole world. "You go! I'll back *you* up!"

"No way!" Touji yelled.

"Yeah, No way!" Kensuke agreed. "He'll probably eat us alive, and then spit us out!"

"Well *I'm* not going so I can be eaten first!" Shinji yelled and crossed his arms defiantly.

"Well go together!" Kaworu said calmly in his Eva Black voice. "Together we will fight for Victory and Win!"

"Yeah!!" Touji, Shinji, and Kensuke agreed. Then each boy made their pose once again and yelled. "EVA RANGERS UNITE!!"

It wasn't long before the four little boys had snuck, undetected behind a bush at the Saionji house. Now, they were just waiting for the right moment to make their move. Other than to saying their speeches and posing again, they didn't have a plan. However, they honestly felt that brave words and a cool pose would be enough to scare the evil out of the green haired teen.

As the boys waited, they were able to hear older boy's phone conversation.

"Yeah man..." Saionji agreed with the person on the phone, then roared. "NO!! I didn't give it to her!"

"Didn't give her what?" Shinji asked his friends in a whisper. The boys shrugged, they had no idea what the evil boy was talking about.

"It hurts!!" Saionji growled. "I swear, I'm going to get her back for this!"

"Get her back for what?" Kensuke asked in a whisper.

"Who knows" Touji whispered back.

"Yeah..." Saionji laughed bitterly "She gave me her girly cooties." He laughed again. "Man, I haven't thought about cooties since I was a kid. I guess they are real after all."

"What's a cootie?" Kaworu asked out *loud*. The other three shrugged. They had no idea.

Out of now where, Saionji appeared in front of the bush they were hiding behind. He glared at the four little boys with uncontained fury and growled out. "You want to know what a cooties is?!!" He pointed at his blistered mouth. "Now get the %*& off my property before I kick your Eva @$$!!"

In all directions the chibbi's scrambled out from behind the bush. They ran away with their eyes tripled in size and their mouth ajar. However, that look of shock was not because they feared for their life. It was because of what they saw All they could think was. He got that from a GIRL!!

::end of flashback::

"Girls do NOT have COOTIES!!!" Hikari and Asuka yelled. The nerve of Kaworu for telling such lies.

"They do to!!" Kensuke confirmed. "We saw them! They are big and red ,and they look like they hurt really really a lot !"

"We saw them too and my sister said she got them from a boy!" Hikari shot back. "The SAME boy you saw with them! He gave my sister cooties!"

"Nuh uh!" Touji yelled .

"Uh huh!" Asuka and Hikari yelled back.

"Please ... Children!!" Ritsuko yelled as she rubbed her temples. "You guys are giving me a headache!" With Rei's piercing cries and Shinji's loud wails, plus the constant loud debates of Asuka, Hikari and the twins, all the noise was about to make the young blond turn around and run home. She didn't live that far away, and she was sure Misato or Kaji could watch Rei and Kaworu. She just wanted to get away from all this drama.

"Rei-chan, you're home." Misato soothed. "I'll take you upstairs to your bathroom so we can wash off your thumb ok?"

The blue haired toddler nodded then cried out. "I wanna call my mommy!" .

"I call her for you." Ritsuko offered.

"I wanna call my mommy too!!" Shinji whimpered to Kaji

"Okay" The male teen agreed warmly. He turned to the left and looked Misato in the eyes. He silently told her that they would be back in a few minutes.

The purple haired teen nodded then turned to Ritsuko. "We are going to have to set the cootie myth straight once-and-for-all when Shinji comes back."

"I couldn't agree more" The blond sighed.

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I still don't own anything that deals with Evangelion.

I love ya lots I really really do

Kimberly