Disclaimer : I own nothing other than story and plot, rest belongs to someone with a lot more money than I could ever dream of…
A/N : This chapter will be a little off the path of the rest of the chapters. I'm going to delve into Kim's past a little and explore her reasons for the letter. This will be from Kim's POV during a phone conversation with her friend Kristin.
THE POWER RANGERS IN :
THE HARDEST THING I EVER DID
Chapter 8
"Kristin? That you girl?" I asked, she mumbled something into the mouthpiece. She sounded tired, what time was it there anyway? I wondered. Around midnight, I figured as I once again looked at the clock sitting on the nightstand. It read just shortly after nine here. "Kris, it's Kim…" I paused as she fumbled with the phone.
"Kim? Girl, have you any idea what time it is here?" She mumbled sounding just slightly annoyed at being woke up in the middle of the night. I was just about to apologize for waking her when she interrupted me, "Sorry girl, you know how I am if my beauty sleep gets interrupted…so what can I do for you? How was your flight anyhow?" She asked and was just starting to sound a little more awake.
"It was fine. Trini and Jase picked me up right on time-"
"I hear a but in there, something happened. What happened Kim?" she asked, immediately picking up that something wasn't being said.
"Everything all at once…it was like a tidal wave hit and I was carried away with the current…" I paused, she knew everything that had happened in Florida. The accident and Victoria's death…the coma and the therapy, my heartache at writing that letter to Tommy, Kristin knew everything that had happened. Including things that Trini or Tommy never suspected occurred.
"Kim, what happened?" She asked, her voice soft and steady.
"There was another accident," I answered.
"And what aren't you telling me Kim?"
"There was a large tractor trailer involved," I said so softly I wasn't sure if she'd heard me or not.
She didn't say anything right away, then I heard her release a soft rush of breath, "Are you alright?" she finally did ask.
"Yeah, it was nothing major…but it just make me-"
"Think of another accident that involved a big rig." she finished for me. "Are you sure that your ok?"
"No, not really," I sighed. "When we got to Jase and Trini's place my old car was sitting in their garage. Completely restored like nothing had ever happened to it. Like the accident had never occurred." My voice was a bare whisper as I got those few sentences out.
"How is that possible? That car was completely totaled, it would've taken a hellish amount of money to fix that junk heap-sorry I didn't mean to insult it like that."
"It's okay…I don't' know how it was fixed either, but it is and it's here…" I paused again as I tried to gain control of my thoughts. "I haven't had time to ask Trini about it yet, I think I must've fainted after seeing it 'cause the next thing I know I'm waking up in a bed screaming…"
"What did you remember Kim?" she asked as if she knew exactly what was on my mind, she had a bad habit of doing that…reading me like an open book, ever since that fateful day of the accident. Though she had tried to talk me out of writing that letter to Tommy, I wish I had listened to her.
"Vicky screaming…someone told me after the accident that she was in a much better place, with her parents…she was in the car with me wasn't she? And she died in that car accident too didn't she?" I could feel the tears threatening then and almost feel them ready to spill down over my lower eyelids. "I killed one of my best friends, didn't I?"
"Oh no Kim!" Kristin gasped. "That accident wasn't your fault, you can't blame yourself for it! You were broad sided by that rig, he went through a red light girl, not you!" She said, I could almost hear the tears in her own voice. "Kim, you can't blame yourself for what happened, do you hear me? It wasn't you fault!"
"What do you remember about it Kris?" I asked, that must've caught her off guard for she was a while coming with a response.
A few seconds later she answered, "Of the accident?" She asked instead of actually answering my question.
"Yeah, what do you remember of it?"
"Only what I was told about it and what was in the newspapers…" she paused.
"Which is?"
"Oh Kim, do I really have to get into it?" she almost whined. It pained her almost as much to think about it and remember those days right after the accident as it pained me not to be able to remember what had happened.
"Please Kris, for me?" I shot back.
"Alright," she sighed. I heard her take a deep breath as she began to relate an accident that had occurred nine long years ago. "You, Victoria, Annette, Renee and myself had all went into, I think it was Miami that day…I'm not sure anymore. Coach had given all of us the morning off, just to unwind a little, give us a break in amongst all the grueling training and practicing we were doing. We went into Miami to try and relax, we were debating going to the beach or not then decided against it.
"We went to a couple stores, hung out at the local mall and just plain enjoyed ourselves for the next few hours. We guy watched for a little while but you weren't very into it, kept comparing most of the guys to Tommy." My heart momentarily stopped beating at the mention of his name. "So we decided to leave and go catch an early lunch…again the only thing out of your mouth was how much this guy or that one reminded you of Tommy. Annette was threatening to dump her soda on you if you didn't shut up immediately. We all got a good laugh at it, but it didn't shut you up.
"Some guy walked in, 'Oh, he reminds me of Tommy…' then the waiter came and Annette started to ignore you and pay attention to him…for a little while until he left to take someone else's order, then she was right back on you about Tommy…it was really actually kind of funny." She paused and drew in a quick breath. "Anyway, we decided to leave, it was almost time to get back to the compound and we didn't want to be late or Coach would have us pulling double-time…" she paused.
"Do you still want me to continue?"
"Yes, please Kris, I need to hear this. I need to know if it matches up with what I now remember." I answered quickly.
"Alright then," she sighed and continued with the tale. "You, Annette and I had all drove our own cars. When we were ready to leave Victoria had decided to ride with you and Renee was going to go with Annette they were going to stop somewhere real quickly before heading back to the compound…don't ask me where 'cause I don't remember anymore. I dared you to a race, to see who would make it back to the compound first, you accepted the dare by insulting my car." she paused again and took in a shaky breath. "We took off down the highway, heading back toward the compound…I looked in my review mirror and you were no where to be found. I turned around to see what had happened to you, you'd gotten a flat tire. I stopped to see if you needed any help, some guy had stopped also and you said you were fine, to go ahead and go back.
"I'd asked Victoria if she wanted to catch a ride with me then…I wish that I had insisted on her coming with me, then maybe she would still be alive…"
I drew in a deep breath, "It wasn't your fault either Kris," I said and realized for the first time since the accident almost nine years ago that it wasn't my fault. I hadn't killed Victoria, I had a green light, the rig went through a red light, it wasn't my fault. I needn't blame myself for her death, there was nothing I could've done. It was like a huge weight had been lifted off of my shoulders and I could breath easier.
"I know, but it's just sometimes when I think about I just wonder you know, what if? What if I had done this or did that? What if I had made her come with me? What if I had waited with you guys till the tire was changed? What if…?" her voice trailed off.
"I know Kris…but could you…um, go on?" I asked hesitantly.
"Huh, oh yeah…" she seemed like she was in a daze and disoriented. "I left…I wish I would've stayed but I didn't. A few minutes later I heard the sirens go off…police cars and ambulances were rushing all over the place…at least three police cruisers passed me on the main road.
"You'd been stopped at a red light…it turned green for you to go and the tractor trailer didn't stop. He went right through the red light and side swiped your car…He hit Vicky's side, they said she more than likely died almost instantly. The rig swung your car around so it started spinning out of control then ended up slamming into the rig again. Your front end was wedged in underneath the tires of the trailer…your car was a total mess Kim.
"I pulled off of the road and waited for you to show up…you didn't so I finally turned around to go back and see what was going on. I figured you had gotten stuck behind whatever had just happened. I remember they had the road blocked off…I asked the police officer that was directing traffic what had happened, he told me that a large tractor trailer had side swiped this little white car…my world started spinning out of control. I left my car sitting there in the middle of the intersection and ran to the scene. They tried holding me back…they didn't want me to see the carnage…they thought you both were going to die on the scene…" I could hear her sniffling, she was fighting back the tears.
"I finally got a glimpse of your car…I started screaming. I remember they asked me if I knew either one of you…I had told them, 'Yeah. I knew both of you.' Your car was such a mess Kim…Vicky's side was totally demolished and your front end was non-existent. Your side was caved in, it had hit something else before returning to smash into the tires of the trailer…" she hiccupped, "Your car was sitting right underneath the trailer, how they had gotten you out I'll never know, but the rear tires of the trailer was sitting flush with your door…you could've died too Kim!"
She was crying now, full out crying. I felt so bad for making her relive that… "I'm sorry Kris for making you go through this, so very sorry." I whispered.
I heard her hiccup again, "It's ok Kim, you needed to know…after the accident…after all was said and done, they said that Vicky had died on the scene due to severe trauma to her head…you were touch and go for awhile, along while…they weren't sure if you were ever going to wake up from the coma you had slipped into.
"We prayed each day…I remember one day I was sitting with Renee in your two's room and the phone rang, she was in no shape to answer it so I did. Some guy asked if you were there…I was dumbfounded, I thought everyone had known about the accident…I asked who it was, he said his name was Tommy. I can't even explain what I felt then…no one had called him or told him what had happened. I didn't have the heart to tell him right then, he sounded so sad like something was bothering him and I didn't think he needed any more bad news.
"So I lied to him then…hoping you would get better soon so you could tell him yourself. Hoping you would just live…I said that Coach had you practicing a really hard routine right now and it was taking up most of your time, I'd tell you he'd called and when you had a spare minute you'd call him back. He said ok, but that sadness was still there in his voice and I began to debate on whether or not I had done the right thing. I was hoping I had done the right thing…"
She paused and I could honestly tell that she still debated on whether or not she had done the right thing. "Then you finally woke up from the coma, but there were complications…"
"I had memory loss of the previous six months before the accident and other things were pretty foggy," I filled in for her. "I had received a severe blow to the head…which left a nasty scar-"
"A piece of the windshield." she said.
"I remember a blinding pain just before I passed out in the car…that must've been what it was. And my back-"
"You'd received a blow to your lower back, they were never sure from what but it had fractured a few of your vertebrae and there was worry you would never be able to walk again without a walker or some sort of helping device. You'd went through extensive therapy for your back, you had to relearn all of your gymnastics…"
"I remember that, I felt so cut off from everyone else. While you were all progressing with your routines I had to learn all of mine over…it was so humiliating. I felt so alone…"
"Then you wrote that letter to Tommy…I tried talking you out of it but you wouldn't listen."
"He deserved so much more than me at that time Kris. I wasn't sure which direction my life was going to go…they still weren't certain if I was going to live or not-"
"What?!"
"There was a piece of glass still embedded within my skull…just at the base of the neck. It wasn't hurting anything but the doctors were worried that if I moved wrong or it moved from where is was positioned at that it would cut something important…my spinal cord or a major artery. But they were afraid to remove it 'cause they weren't sure if it would do more damage trying to remove it or by just letting it where it was. In the end they decided to remove it-"
"That's why you went back into the hospital a few days after you'd been released?" Kris asked, certain things must've started slipping into place for her. "It took them that long to decide to remove it?"
"Yeah," I answered. "If they had left it where it was at there were a lot of things I wouldn't be allowed to do, gymnastics included. I wanted it removed and so I argued with the doctors and Coach and finally they agreed that it should be removed, but there was the chance something could go wrong and that I'd never wake up from the surgery. That was when I decided to write that letter to Tommy. I knew if he found out about what had happened he'd try to come to Florida and be with me and I couldn't let him do that when there were people who needed him so much more than I did. There were people who where depending on him…I couldn't do that to him."
"Don't you think you should have left that decision up to me Kim?" he suddenly asked from the doorway of the room. I looked up and froze. How long had he been standing there? I thought he'd left, I'd heard his jeep leave, I know I had!
The tears started to roll down my face, "I'm sorry Tommy," I whispered.
Without thinking he strode into the room, took the phone from me, "She'll call you back later," put the phone back on it's cradle and looked me deep in the eyes. "Now why don't you explain all of this to me, Kim?" he asked and sat down on the bed in front of me.
Am I mean or what? You want more? R&R like always, thanks!
