Author's Note: Obviously I don't own the original song, but I do own the lyrics for the parody.

Why did that red wine stain on me?

I can't get it out
Everyone said my shirt would be so alright
Still I can't get it out
I'm trying all the stain devils mum brought round
Clean white shirt
Where have you gone?
I know that red wine somehow did you wrong.

Chorus:
Why did that red wine stain on me?
Is it because I drank when I was seventeen?
Why did that red wine stain on me?
Even when I used a napkin
I couldn't dodge that red stain.

I've tried all I could
But none of it seems to have been any good
All that red wine's still there
At least champagne would look so clear
Clean white shirt
Where have you gone?
I know that red wine somehow did you wrong.

Repeat Chorus

Oh, why does that stain still show?
Why won't it just plain go?
It won't go.

I can't get it out
Everybody said my shirt would be so alright
Still I can't get it out
I'm trying all of the stain devils mum brought round
Clean white shirt
Where have you gone?
I know that red wine somehow did you wrong.

Repeat Chorus

Oh, why does that stain still show?
Why won't it just plain go?
It won't go.

Repeat Chorus