For They Shall Be Filled

For They Shall Be Filled

By: Vain

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Vain: Story. Read. Review. NOW.

Ken: I think she means read and review. Oh, and she's still accepting Guardian info. Thanks!

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~"For the hearts of this people have grown dull. Their ears are hard of hearing,

and their eyes they have closed, lest they should see with their eyes and hear with their ears,

lest they should understand with their hearts and turn, so that I should heal them.

But blessed are your eyes for they see, and your ears for they hear . . ."

-Matthew 13: 15 and 16

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Part Twenty

"Gennai is not pleased with our decision to test the Children in this manner. I fear that he may feel the need to take steps to guard against it."

"Gennai is our servant. He knows his place."

"And if he decides otherwise?"

"He will not."

"You seem to be quite sure of yourself, my friend. Have you forgotten that he is first and foremost the Children's Guardian?"

"Your doubts will be the end of you. He knows his duty."

"Precisely. And his duty is to the Digidestined."

"And that is all that's disturbing you?"

"No . . . There is something more. I feel a great foreboding."

"Are you frightened now? You always were so weak—getting attached to humans the way you do."

"Say what you wish, but I sense a great power coming into being."

"I respect you, but you can be very foolish sometimes.

"And you, my friend, are overzealous!"

"Enough. We have committed ourselves to this course of action. Would you pull out now?"

"Of course not. I merely wished to point out—"

"Point taken. The Testing must begin now."

**************

Trial # 1: Yolei Inoue

Yolei blinked several times as the flash of light faded. She looked across the grass to see the others all sprawled out on the field. Her boyfriend lay next to her and Izzy and Poromon lay on her other side. The wine-haired girl sat up, adjusted her glasses, and, after carefully waking her little pink digimon, gently touched her boyfriend on the cheek. "Ken?" she whispered. "Ken-chan, wake up."

The boy groaned and violet eyes fluttered open. He groaned. "Yolei? Lei-chan, what happened?"

"Demiveemon stuck his arm through the portal and it exploded."

"I guess it wasn't safe."

"I guess not." A crick in her neck made the girl grunt.

Ken sat bolt upright and reached out to gently grasp her shoulders, concern and love shone in his eyes. "Are you alright?"

She frowned as she looked at him, her brow furrowing and fear and confusion dancing across her deeply carved features. " . . . No. Something's wrong." She pushed herself to her feet and her heart nearly leapt into her throat when she remembered Izzy on the ground.

"Izzy!" Yolei dropped to her knees next to him. "Oh, no."

Ken looked up from where he was hunched over Minomon and watched her in bewilderment. "Lei-chan . . .? What's wrong?"

She whirled around to look at him in irritation. "Stop calling me that!"

"But I always call you that."

By now the others were stirring.

Yolei blinked in response, surprised by her own actions. She then blushed and stared at the ground. "I know. I'm sorry; I guess I'm just overwrought," she apologized lamely. "I'm sorry to snap at you. You should go help the others."

He pouted, but lifted up his digimon and did as he was told. "Okay, Yolei . . . If that's what you want . . ."

Yolei turned her attentions back to Izzy. "C'mon, Iz. Please wake up." Poromon fluttered around anxiously in a failed attempt to be helpful.

Nonetheless, their efforts were rewarded when the older boy groaned and opened his nearly black eyes. He sat up and rubbed his head with an offended air. "Perhaps next time you'll listen to me," he chided Demiveemon who was fluttering around Davis a few feet away.

The little in-training blushed and buried his tiny face in his partner's arm as Davis pushed himself upright. The Keeper of Courage and Friendship shot Izzy an annoyed glance. "It was an accident, man. Demi didn't mean anything by it.

Izzumi grunted.

Yolei pulled back, only to find Ken's arms gently encircling her waist. She lurched away and wheeled around to face him, hands clenched into fists at her sides. The boy wonder pulled back with his arms raised defensively. "What is with you, Yolei?! Did you hit your head?" Minomon looked shocked.

"Yolei?" Kari asked as she walked forward. "What's wrong?"

Gatomon and Patamon eyed her curiously and the cat-like champion shrugged. "She's finally lost it," she declared in a bored tone.

TK's arm was casually slung around the Child of Light's waist and the confusion in his face mirrored that of everyone else. "Is something wrong with Yolei?"

With a dark frown of concern, Ken approached the startled girl with his arms extended, cautiously this time. "Lei-chan?"

She bit her lip and then leaned into his embrace. "My head feels funny."

He gently led her over to the picnic table and sat her down. Davis, Tai and Matt's worried faces floated past her vision and she buried her face in Ken's shoulder. She felt his chest vibrate as he spoke and gently stroked her long hair. "Please tell us what's wrong."

She pulled away with tears simmering in her soft lavender eyes. "I—no, it's nothing. I just . . . I need some air."

Ken bit his lip and looked over her head at the others. He turned back to her. "Is it something I did, love?"

"No, it's nothing like that, Ken-chan, I . . . I'm just a little dizzy."

The girl freed herself from the loose embrace and got up, trying to ignore Ken's worried frown as it burned a hole into her back. It's nothing that you did, Ken, she thought as she walked off, losing herself to the cool forest. It's me. How are you supposed to tell your best friend that you weren't in love with him? We've been together since that first soccer game—he loves me. But I don't love him . . . at least, not like that.

When she had discovered that she had caught the fancy of the famous Ken Ichijouji Yolei had been thrilled. Ken, the Ken, Ichijouji liked her. They had begun dating immediately. Discovering that he had a D-3 had been almost too much. Sure, there were a couple of nasty scrapes in the Digital World against the Emperor (Cody Hida may have been small, but he was also very dangerous, especially after he had run away), but Ken and Davis always lead their team to victory, or at least a draw. But the more time passed, and the longer they were together, Yolei learned more and more about him . . . and found herself attracted to him less and less.

When they had begun dating, Yolei had consented for three reasons: (1) He was cute, (2) He was Ken Ichijouji and Ken Ichijouji always got what he wanted, and (3) Everyone expected her to yes. So she had. But she wasn't cut out for Ken. She simply could not make herself love him. She tried, god knows she had tried, but the more she tried the less she loved him. It was getting to the point where she was almost repelled by him.

Ken had an intensity about him, an aura of profundity that he projected to the world. A month into their relationship, Yolei discovered that it wasn't merely an aura—it was Ken. And that scared the hell out of her. Ken was like Kari—ethereal and untouchable; but if Kari was the sun, then Ken was the moon. He was moody, changing, luminous, and somehow almost something sacred, but with a dark side as deep as a black hole. Yolei had thought that that was an act. How was she supposed to know that that was him?

What's that old saying? she thought with a humorless smirk. Fools rush in where angels fear to tread. Abruptly the smirk turned rictus. That was something Izzy would say. Izzy.

That was a whole separate issue, yet therein lay her problem—or at least a big chunk of it. She was in love with Izzy Izzumi. And, as if her involvement with Ken wasn't trial enough, she knew for a fact the Mimi was in love with him, too.

Damn. No matter what I do, someone gets hurt. I'm lying to everyone now. I'm lying to Ken and leading him on. I'm deceiving Izzy about the nature of my feelings towards him, and if I have to hear Mimi sigh and gush over him one more time, I'll kill myself!

"Yolei," Mimi would say over the phone or by IM or e-mail, "You are so lucky to have a guy like Ken who adores you and would do anything for you."

And he would! She knew he would. Ken put her on a pedestal so high she could barely see the earth, let alone the ground. He loved her so much it was painful. It would kill him if he discovered the truth. But the lies were killing her . . .

And what would the others say? They would certainly side with Ken, and rightfully so. How could she justify the little charade? Say that she did it for love? Well, she did, but that didn't make it right. Mimi would have a coronary if she discovered Yolei's feelings towards her "Iz-chan."

What do I do? What can I do?

She certainly couldn't go back to the campsite and face the patient and boundless love in Ken' eyes again. It was like an acid knife twisting slowly in her soul. But she couldn't just stay here either.

And Gennai's test was today too. Double damn. He had told them that having skeletons in the closet would not be a good idea for this—but she didn't want to break anyone's heart.

This isn't fair.

"Yolei?!"

"Lei-chan?!"

And it just kept getting worse. That was Ken and Izzy, she'd bet her very soul on it. The two people she wanted to see both more and less than anything in the world were looking for her. I can't ever get away, she thought with a growing sense of claustrophobia. I can never ever be free of this burden. They'll always pursue me . . . And between the two of them, she didn't stand a chance.

"I'm here!" she called, running her fingers through her hair in an admittedly half-assed attempt to compose herself. She wiped her face absently. Tears? Now where had they come from?

The two boys entered the area where she was together. Ken immediately went to her side. "Are you okay?" he asked.

"Don't." She pulled away from him.

Ken sighed and pain spasmed over his face. "What?!" he cried at last in exasperation. "Am I suddenly poison? What is going on with you?"

Yolei looked away from him to the ground—to anything that wasn't those anguished eyes.

Izzy frowned and looked from her face to Ken's and back. He advanced towards her with an outstretched arm. "Yolei—"

Months of tension suddenly tore out of her in one instant, her senses taking flight and her sensibility shattering beneath the pressure of her guilt. "NO!!!!" Yolei wailed. She threw herself blindly away from both of them and dropped to her knees, wrapping her arms around herself as though in pain. "You want to know what's going on?" she snarled in a foreign voice. "Do you?!" She stood, spun around, and advanced on Ken as he stepped back, alarmed by the menace in her carriage. Her voice dropped to a whisper. "Do you?"

Ken looked into her eyes and saw a stranger.

"I'm in love with Izzy."

"…"

The bombshell announcement fell on the clearing and plunged them all into silence. Yolei was shaking with force of her emotions and Ken looked at her blankly, half-afraid for her sanity. The confession didn't sit particularly well with the Child of Knowledge either. His face fell into an empty expression of non-comprehension.

Ken shook his head slowly and gripped Yolei's shoulders. He stared into his girlfriend's eyes and spoke slowly, as one does to an ailing child. ". . . No." The word was not a denial, it was an outright refusal. Things like this did not happen to Ken Ichijouji. Perhaps they did in some other world, but in this one such a thing was not possible.

Yolei saw the refusal in his eyes and heard it in his word, but she could also see fear beyond that. Fear and something terrible. There were no words to describe that other emotion she saw in Ken's intense violet-blue eyes. If it was possible for eyes to bleed pain, then that is what she saw when she looked at Ken. His soul was raw and bleeding.

"Yes," she shook her head in a contradicting manner. "Please, Ken! I. Love. Izzy."

Impact. The refusal was gone, taking with it the fear. This was a blow that life would not spare him. His face crumbled and he bit his lip hard. Blood slip down his chin as he shook his head. "… No!"

Yolei's tears resurfaced and slid down her cheeks, cool streaks against her burning skin. "Yes. I'm so sorry."

Then Ken was gone. Calling upon all the speed deserving of his name, "Rocket," Ken Ichijouji turned and fled into the forest. Yolei did not pursue him. She couldn't.

A movement behind her startled the wine-haired girl and she turned to see Izzy standing about a foot away. She looked up at him, eyes large and luminous with tears.

And he slapped her.

It wasn't hard, just enough to hurt, just enough to drive his words across and nail them into her heart with steel stakes. "You disgust me."

Then Izzy was gone too, and Yolei was alone with a bruise on her cheek, tears in her eyes, and unable to believe that she had just done what she had done. But she had . . . she had! And it could never be undone. Her legs collapsed beneath her. "I've lost him," she whispered numbly. "I've lost them both."

An unimaginable weight settled in heart and she drew her knees up to her chest. Her sobs shook her entire body. I've lost them both . . .

You are worthy.

"What?!" Yolei looked around blindly. I'm hearing voices now?

Remember, Child. You have been found worthy.

The odd nagging feeling vanished and the weight on her heart lessened.

I'm worthy? "This?" she gasped, "This was my test?!"

The false memories in her mind began to fade away. Ken isn't my boyfriend and Izzy . . . Oh my GOD!! The reality of what had just happened to her was like a slap in the face—her second one in so many minutes.

We are pleased with you, Child of Love and Sincerity.

"You bastards!!!" she shrieked in rage. She was on her feet and shaking with fury, her hair whipping about her as she gestured wildly. "How dare you!! How dare you invade my mind and use my fears against me! What gives you the goddamn right?!"

We had no choice. If you could not withstand this darkness in your soul, you would not have withstood the Dark One.

"You're all sick! You're sick twisted freaks! You know what you can do with your 'Dark One?' You can take him and shove him up your—"

It was necessary.

"Necessary? Playing mind games is 'necessary?' "

You had to know Hatred. You had to know Deception and Unrequited Love.

"Why?!" she screamed, half a shout and half a sob. "Why?! So you people could get your twisted jollies?!"

Because for all Darkness, there must be an equal amount of Light. To strengthen the Light in your soul we had to strengthen the Darkness. If you were to remain on the path of Light it was necessary that you draw upon the natures of your Crests to introduce it. It had to be your choice.

"My choice?" the shaken Digidestined whispered in disbelief. "My choice? That wasn't my choice," she spat out the words in disgust, "that was spiritual rape."

… We are sorry for your pain, Child. Yolei almost believed it. Almost. Sleep now. Rest and be Blessed. Your trial is over.

Exhaustion slid into her mind, but she fought it tooth and nail. "No! I won't let you do this to me again. I won't let you do this to my friends—" But it was a losing battle and with a few stubborn blinks, she succumbed. As she drifted off she felt an incredible lightness settle over her heart and warmth suffuse her. Yet somehow, beyond that, Yolei was very much aware of the black weight that had burrowed deep within her soul. It danced across the Light like oil and clung to her, a black veil weighing down on her heart. She knew without being told that it was a weight that would never be lifted.

**************

"She passed. You are not pleased with the results?"

"Have you sensed nothing from the Digital World?"

"No. Why do you persist in this fantasy? Gennai is there. What could go wrong?"

"Famous last words. I still stand against this."

"You know that you were outvoted."

"Yes . . . but still, I wonder that Love was not right. Perhaps we are no better than that which we despise."

"This is for our own safety as well as that of the Digital World."

"And that is justification for our actions?"

"Yes. The next Test begins."

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