For They Shall Be Filled
By:
Vain
__________________________________________________________
Vain: Story. Read. Review. NOW.
Ken: I
think she means read and review. Oh,
and she's still accepting Guardian info. Thanks!
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
~"For the hearts of this people have grown dull. Their ears are hard of hearing,
and their eyes they have closed, lest they should see with
their eyes and hear with their ears,
lest they should understand with their hearts and turn, so
that I should heal them.
But blessed are your eyes for they see, and your ears for
they hear . . ."
-Matthew 13: 15 and 16
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Part Twenty
"Gennai is not
pleased with our decision to test the Children in this manner. I fear that he may feel the need to take
steps to guard against it."
"Gennai is our
servant. He knows his place."
"And if he
decides otherwise?"
"He will not."
"You seem to be
quite sure of yourself, my friend. Have
you forgotten that he is first and foremost the Children's Guardian?"
"Your doubts
will be the end of you. He knows his
duty."
"Precisely. And his duty is to the Digidestined."
"And that is
all that's disturbing you?"
"No . . . There
is something more. I feel a great
foreboding."
"Are you
frightened now? You always were so
weak—getting attached to humans the way you do."
"Say what you
wish, but I sense a great power coming into being."
"I respect you,
but you can be very foolish sometimes.
"And you, my
friend, are overzealous!"
"Enough. We have committed ourselves to this course
of action. Would you pull out now?"
"Of course not. I merely wished to point out—"
"Point
taken. The Testing must begin now."
**************
Trial # 1: Yolei Inoue
Yolei blinked
several times as the flash of light faded. She looked across the grass to see the others all sprawled out on the
field. Her boyfriend lay next to her
and Izzy and Poromon lay on her other side. The wine-haired girl sat up, adjusted her glasses, and, after carefully
waking her little pink digimon, gently touched her boyfriend on the cheek. "Ken?" she whispered. "Ken-chan, wake up."
The boy groaned
and violet eyes fluttered open. He
groaned. "Yolei? Lei-chan, what happened?"
"Demiveemon stuck
his arm through the portal and it exploded."
"I guess it wasn't
safe."
"I guess
not." A crick in her neck made the girl
grunt.
Ken sat bolt
upright and reached out to gently grasp her shoulders, concern and love shone
in his eyes. "Are you alright?"
She frowned as she
looked at him, her brow furrowing and fear and confusion dancing across her
deeply carved features. " . . .
No. Something's wrong." She pushed herself to her feet and her heart
nearly leapt into her throat when she remembered Izzy on the ground.
"Izzy!" Yolei dropped to her knees next to him. "Oh, no."
Ken looked up from
where he was hunched over Minomon and watched her in bewilderment. "Lei-chan . . .? What's wrong?"
She whirled around
to look at him in irritation. "Stop
calling me that!"
"But I always call
you that."
By now the others
were stirring.
Yolei blinked in
response, surprised by her own actions. She then blushed and stared at the ground. "I know. I'm sorry; I
guess I'm just overwrought," she apologized lamely. "I'm sorry to snap at you. You should go help the others."
He pouted, but
lifted up his digimon and did as he was told. "Okay, Yolei . . . If that's what you want . . ."
Yolei turned her
attentions back to Izzy. "C'mon,
Iz. Please wake up." Poromon fluttered around anxiously in a
failed attempt to be helpful.
Nonetheless, their
efforts were rewarded when the older boy groaned and opened his nearly black
eyes. He sat up and rubbed his head
with an offended air. "Perhaps next
time you'll listen to me," he chided Demiveemon who was fluttering around Davis
a few feet away.
The little
in-training blushed and buried his tiny face in his partner's arm as Davis
pushed himself upright. The Keeper of
Courage and Friendship shot Izzy an annoyed glance. "It was an accident, man. Demi didn't mean anything by it.
Izzumi grunted.
Yolei pulled back,
only to find Ken's arms gently encircling her waist. She lurched away and wheeled around to face him, hands clenched
into fists at her sides. The boy wonder
pulled back with his arms raised defensively. "What is with you, Yolei?! Did
you hit your head?" Minomon looked
shocked.
"Yolei?" Kari
asked as she walked forward. "What's
wrong?"
Gatomon and
Patamon eyed her curiously and the cat-like champion shrugged. "She's finally lost it," she declared in a
bored tone.
TK's arm was
casually slung around the Child of Light's waist and the confusion in his face
mirrored that of everyone else. "Is
something wrong with Yolei?"
With a dark frown
of concern, Ken approached the startled girl with his arms extended, cautiously
this time. "Lei-chan?"
She bit her lip
and then leaned into his embrace. "My
head feels funny."
He gently led her
over to the picnic table and sat her down. Davis, Tai and Matt's worried faces floated past her vision and she
buried her face in Ken's shoulder. She
felt his chest vibrate as he spoke and gently stroked her long hair. "Please tell us what's wrong."
She pulled away
with tears simmering in her soft lavender eyes. "I—no, it's nothing. I
just . . . I need some air."
Ken bit his lip
and looked over her head at the others. He turned back to her. "Is it
something I did, love?"
"No, it's nothing
like that, Ken-chan, I . . . I'm just a little dizzy."
The girl freed
herself from the loose embrace and got up, trying to ignore Ken's worried frown
as it burned a hole into her back. It's
nothing that you did, Ken, she thought as she walked off, losing herself to
the cool forest. It's me. How are you supposed to tell your best
friend that you weren't in love with him? We've been together since that first soccer game—he loves me. But I don't love him . . . at least, not
like that.
When she had
discovered that she had caught the fancy of the famous Ken Ichijouji Yolei had
been thrilled. Ken, the Ken,
Ichijouji liked her. They had begun
dating immediately. Discovering that he
had a D-3 had been almost too much. Sure, there were a couple of nasty scrapes in the Digital World against
the Emperor (Cody Hida may have been small, but he was also very dangerous,
especially after he had run away), but Ken and Davis always lead their team to
victory, or at least a draw. But the
more time passed, and the longer they were together, Yolei learned more and
more about him . . . and found herself attracted to him less and less.
When they had
begun dating, Yolei had consented for three reasons: (1) He was cute, (2) He
was Ken Ichijouji and Ken Ichijouji always got what he wanted, and (3) Everyone
expected her to yes. So she had. But she wasn't cut out for Ken. She simply could not make herself love
him. She tried, god knows she had
tried, but the more she tried the less she loved him. It was getting to the point where she was almost repelled by
him.
Ken had an
intensity about him, an aura of profundity that he projected to the world. A month into their relationship, Yolei
discovered that it wasn't merely an aura—it was Ken. And that scared the hell out of her. Ken was like Kari—ethereal and untouchable; but if Kari was the
sun, then Ken was the moon. He was
moody, changing, luminous, and somehow almost something sacred, but with a dark
side as deep as a black hole. Yolei had
thought that that was an act. How was
she supposed to know that that was him?
What's that old
saying? she thought with a
humorless smirk. Fools rush in where
angels fear to tread. Abruptly the
smirk turned rictus. That was something
Izzy would say. Izzy.
That was a whole
separate issue, yet therein lay her problem—or at least a big chunk of it. She was in love with Izzy Izzumi. And, as if her involvement with Ken wasn't
trial enough, she knew for a fact the Mimi was in love with him, too.
Damn. No matter what I do, someone gets hurt. I'm lying to everyone now. I'm lying to Ken and leading him on. I'm deceiving Izzy about the nature of my
feelings towards him, and if I have to hear Mimi sigh and gush over him one
more time, I'll kill myself!
"Yolei," Mimi would say over the phone or by IM or
e-mail, "You are so lucky to have a guy like Ken who adores you and would do
anything for you."
And he would! She knew he would. Ken put her on a pedestal so high she could barely see the earth,
let alone the ground. He loved her so
much it was painful. It would kill him
if he discovered the truth. But the
lies were killing her . . .
And what would the
others say? They would certainly side
with Ken, and rightfully so. How could
she justify the little charade? Say
that she did it for love? Well, she
did, but that didn't make it right. Mimi would have a coronary if she discovered Yolei's feelings towards
her "Iz-chan."
What do I
do? What can I do?
She certainly
couldn't go back to the campsite and face the patient and boundless love in
Ken' eyes again. It was like an acid
knife twisting slowly in her soul. But
she couldn't just stay here either.
And Gennai's test
was today too. Double damn. He had told them that having skeletons in
the closet would not be a good idea for this—but she didn't want to break
anyone's heart.
This isn't fair.
"Yolei?!"
"Lei-chan?!"
And it just kept
getting worse. That was Ken and Izzy,
she'd bet her very soul on it. The two
people she wanted to see both more and less than anything in the world were
looking for her. I can't ever get
away, she thought with a growing sense of claustrophobia. I can never ever be free of this
burden. They'll always pursue me . . .
And between the two of them, she didn't stand a chance.
"I'm here!" she
called, running her fingers through her hair in an admittedly half-assed
attempt to compose herself. She wiped
her face absently. Tears? Now where had they come from?
The two boys
entered the area where she was together. Ken immediately went to her side. "Are you okay?" he asked.
"Don't." She pulled away from him.
Ken sighed and
pain spasmed over his face. "What?!" he
cried at last in exasperation. "Am I
suddenly poison? What is going on with you?"
Yolei looked away
from him to the ground—to anything that wasn't those anguished eyes.
Izzy frowned and
looked from her face to Ken's and back. He advanced towards her with an outstretched arm. "Yolei—"
Months of tension
suddenly tore out of her in one instant, her senses taking flight and her
sensibility shattering beneath the pressure of her guilt. "NO!!!!" Yolei wailed. She threw herself blindly away from both of
them and dropped to her knees, wrapping her arms around herself as though in pain. "You want to know what's going on?" she
snarled in a foreign voice. "Do
you?!" She stood, spun around, and
advanced on Ken as he stepped back, alarmed by the menace in her carriage. Her voice dropped to a whisper. "Do you?"
Ken looked into
her eyes and saw a stranger.
"I'm in love with
Izzy."
"…"
The bombshell
announcement fell on the clearing and plunged them all into silence. Yolei was shaking with force of her emotions
and Ken looked at her blankly, half-afraid for her sanity. The confession didn't sit particularly well
with the Child of Knowledge either. His
face fell into an empty expression of non-comprehension.
Ken shook his head
slowly and gripped Yolei's shoulders. He stared into his girlfriend's eyes and spoke slowly, as one does to an
ailing child. ". . . No." The word was not a denial, it was an
outright refusal. Things like this did
not happen to Ken Ichijouji. Perhaps
they did in some other world, but in this one such a thing was not possible.
Yolei saw the
refusal in his eyes and heard it in his word, but she could also see fear
beyond that. Fear and something
terrible. There were no words to
describe that other emotion she saw in Ken's intense violet-blue eyes. If it was possible for eyes to bleed pain,
then that is what she saw when she looked at Ken. His soul was raw and bleeding.
"Yes," she shook
her head in a contradicting manner. "Please, Ken! I. Love. Izzy."
Impact. The refusal was gone, taking with it the
fear. This was a blow that life would
not spare him. His face crumbled and he
bit his lip hard. Blood slip down his
chin as he shook his head. "… No!"
Yolei's tears
resurfaced and slid down her cheeks, cool streaks against her burning
skin. "Yes. I'm so sorry."
Then Ken was
gone. Calling upon all the speed
deserving of his name, "Rocket," Ken Ichijouji turned and fled into the
forest. Yolei did not pursue him. She couldn't.
A movement behind
her startled the wine-haired girl and she turned to see Izzy standing about a
foot away. She looked up at him, eyes
large and luminous with tears.
And he slapped
her.
It wasn't hard,
just enough to hurt, just enough to drive his words across and nail them into
her heart with steel stakes. "You
disgust me."
Then Izzy was gone
too, and Yolei was alone with a bruise on her cheek, tears in her eyes, and
unable to believe that she had just done what she had done. But she had . . . she had! And it could never be undone. Her legs collapsed beneath her. "I've lost him," she whispered numbly. "I've lost them both."
An unimaginable
weight settled in heart and she drew her knees up to her chest. Her sobs shook her entire body. I've lost them both . . .
You are worthy.
"What?!" Yolei
looked around blindly. I'm hearing
voices now?
Remember,
Child. You have been found worthy.
The odd nagging
feeling vanished and the weight on her heart lessened.
I'm worthy? "This?" she gasped, "This was my test?!"
The false memories
in her mind began to fade away. Ken
isn't my boyfriend and Izzy . . . Oh my GOD!! The reality of what had just happened to her was like a slap in
the face—her second one in so many minutes.
We are pleased
with you, Child of Love and Sincerity.
"You bastards!!!"
she shrieked in rage. She was on her
feet and shaking with fury, her hair whipping about her as she gestured
wildly. "How dare you!! How dare you invade my mind and use my fears
against me! What gives you the goddamn right?!"
We had no
choice. If you could not withstand this
darkness in your soul, you would not have withstood the Dark One.
"You're all
sick! You're sick twisted freaks! You know what you can do with your 'Dark
One?' You can take him and shove him up
your—"
It was
necessary.
"Necessary? Playing mind games is 'necessary?' "
You had to know
Hatred. You had to know Deception and
Unrequited Love.
"Why?!" she
screamed, half a shout and half a sob. "Why?! So you people could get
your twisted jollies?!"
Because for all
Darkness, there must be an equal amount of Light. To strengthen the Light in your soul we had to strengthen the
Darkness. If you were to remain on the
path of Light it was necessary that you draw upon the natures of your Crests to
introduce it. It had to be your choice.
"My choice?" the
shaken Digidestined whispered in disbelief. "My choice? That wasn't my
choice," she spat out the words in disgust, "that was spiritual rape."
… We are sorry
for your pain, Child. Yolei almost believed it. Almost. Sleep now. Rest and be
Blessed. Your trial is over.
Exhaustion slid
into her mind, but she fought it tooth and nail. "No! I won't let you do
this to me again. I won't let you do
this to my friends—" But it was a
losing battle and with a few stubborn blinks, she succumbed. As she drifted off she felt an incredible
lightness settle over her heart and warmth suffuse her. Yet somehow, beyond that, Yolei was very
much aware of the black weight that had burrowed deep within her soul. It danced across the Light like oil and
clung to her, a black veil weighing down on her heart. She knew without being told that it was a
weight that would never be lifted.
**************
"She
passed. You are not pleased with the
results?"
"Have you
sensed nothing from the Digital World?"
"No. Why do you persist in this fantasy? Gennai is there. What could go wrong?"
"Famous last
words. I still stand against this."
"You know that
you were outvoted."
"Yes . . . but
still, I wonder that Love was not right. Perhaps we are no better than that which we despise."
"This is for
our own safety as well as that of the Digital World."
"And that is
justification for our actions?"
"Yes. The next Test begins."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
