Disclaimer - Elf-a just-a own-a Reese-a. Nadda else-a. Not-a even Watto speak-a. hehe-a
A/N - Thank you oodles and noodles to everyone who's reviewed! *cheesy grin* I'm eternally motivated to write more of this nutty tale when you give me such awesome feedback! Hehe. Oh, and thanks for the suggestion, cherubino à WARNING: NOT TO READ AT WORK. Hehe. And now, on with the show!
Harper for a Day - Chapter Three
Beka was laughing so hard that tears were streaming down her cheeks as she walked onto the Bridge. Dylan and Tyr looked at her.
"She found him?" Dylan guessed.
"She found HER," Beka corrected him. "Then she found him."
"Oh dear," Dylan grimaced. "And the situation is?"
"Ground zero, Captain," Beka sputtered.
"Poor Harper," Dylan said.
"'Poor Harper', indeed," Tyr scoffed. "It is my understanding that this silly game was the boy's idea in the first place. In addition, humiliation can be a powerful adrenaline stimulant. If what I suspect did indeed occur during the meeting between Reese and Trance, then I believe, when our young Navigations Officer catches up to our Chief Engineer, my sentiments would tend to be more along the lines of 'Poor Andromeda'. For whatever room in which their altercation takes place will surely not emerge from the ordeal unscathed."
"My thoughts exactly," Rommie's image appeared on-screen. "It's good to know that somebody cares. Now, if it's not too much trouble, a little help would be appreciated."
"Where are they, Rommie?" Dylan asked her.
"Mess Hall."
"On our way," Dylan nodded. "Tyr, let's go. Beka...breathe."
Beka nodded, then burst into another fit of giggles.
*
"GET OVER HERE!"
"Uh, hmm, lemme think about that for a second--NO!"
"Reese, please calm down," Rommie's hologram tried to reason with her. She was ignored.
"SEAMUS ZELAZNY HARPER-"
Harper cringed at the use of his full name, looking across the table that separated him from his enraged girlfriend. "Aw, c'mon Babe, don't be like that. Can't we just talk for a moment like civilized-" He ducked as a plate of food leftovers flew at him. "Guess not."
"You didn't even WARN me!" Reese hissed.
"Look, Doll, it was a spur of the moment thing, and I had to act like Trance to win the bet, and I figured...maybe...you wouldn't really have a problem with it?" He winced as she practically snarled at that comment, her fingers gripping on the back of a chair. "Okay, Sugar Cookie, I'll admit, maybe it was a teeny-weeny bit irresponsible of me not to let you know, but-"
"But what, Harper? You thought maybe I like being humiliated by one of my best friends, right in front of my cousin, who was obviously enjoying every minute of it? You thought I would get a kick out of having my head messed with, maybe? Or were you curious to see whether or not I would swing the other way after Trance kissed me? Was that it?"
"No! No, it was nothing like that, er, um, Rommie? Help me out, here?" Harper pleaded.
"Right, because I've been so effective with that thus far," Rommie retorted.
"Look, I was hoping you wouldn't find out, Pookie," Harper continued his ass-kissing. "But, you have to admit, it was kinda funny..."
"Ooh, bad move," Rommie clenched her teeth.
"Funny?" Reese was seething, and her fingers clamped down on the chair. "You thought it was funny?"
"No, wait, Muffin, that's not what I meant to say," he held his hands out in front of him, using the universal symbol for STOP! His eyes had enlarged to the size of dinner plates. "I...I meant..."
"RRGH!" she growled, lifting the chair up. At that moment, though, a pair of muscle-bound arms snared her around the waist, lifting her several feet off the floor. Another set of hands tugged the chair from her grasp, and set it back on the ground before the owner moved over to where Harper cowered on the other side of the table. The Engineer took one look at the ripped Nietzschean restraining the girl, then one more look at the protective figure of his 'Greek god-like' Captain, and sighed his relief after hiding behind Dylan.
"That's quite enough, little one," Tyr's voice stated firmly in Reese's ear.
"I agree," Dylan smiled. "It would take more time than I can afford to find a replacement Engineer."
"I think you should listen to them, Schnookums," Harper nodded encouragingly.
"Mr. Anasazi, would you please escort Miss Valentine to her quarters?" Dylan requested. "I think she needs time to cool down."
"Excellent decision," Harper agreed.
"Mr. Harper?" Dylan looked down at him.
"Yeah, Boss?"
"Zip it."
Harper made a zipping motion across his lips, twisted his fingers and threw away the imaginary zipper. Tyr hoisted Reese over his shoulder and strolled casually out of the Mess Hall, with Reese giving icy death glares to Harper from her spot six-feet-plus off the ground.
"My Hero," Rommie commented.
"Don't mention it," Dylan winked at her.
*
"Tyr, you'd better not be doing what I think you're doing," Reese warned him.
"Dylan suggested that you required time to 'cool down'," Tyr replied. "That is exactly what I intend to see that you do."
"You wouldn't dare."
"Keep telling yourself that."
"Tyr, don't you-" her efforts were in vain, as Tyr turned on the cold water in her should full blast and dumped her inside. "AAAUUUGGGHHH! TYR, YOU-"
"Sit," he commanded, and she involuntarily obliged, letting the steady stream of icy water soak her from head to toe. Her rapid breathing and elevated heart rate slowly subsided, until she eventually took a deep breath and sighed. "There," the Nietzschean smirked. "Feel better, now?"
"Oh, sure," she rolled her eyes. "I've always wanted hypothermia."
"I doubt it will come to that. Besides, it is nothing that cannot be easily treated."
"Except when Harper is your medical officer."
Tyr sat down on the toilet seat, put his elbows on his lap and touched his index fingers to his lips, studying the girl as she sat huddled and beginning to shiver in the shower stall. Tyr reached for the tap and adjusted the temperature to lukewarm, and she smiled in appreciation.
"There is no sense in losing your temper over such a trivial thing," he informed her. "The boy is apt to do foolish things without thinking - that is his nature. In all honestly, I am befuddled to think of how a person so obviously brilliant can be such a brainless twit."
"But he's my brainless twit," Reese smiled, understanding Tyr's sudden need to bond.
"Exactly," Tyr conceded. "And as odd as his little schemes are that come out of that warped little mind, his feelings for you are genuine, and I do not believe that he made this bet with intents to humiliate you on his mind."
"Yeah, I know," Reese sighed.
"Your cousin, on the other hand..."
"Excuse me?"
"Oh, yes, Beka was thrilled with the prospect of finally catching you 'lose your cool' or something of the sort," Tyr's eyes twinkled.
"Oh, I am going to kill her," Reese declared.
"All in due time, little one," Tyr stood up. "Save your revenge for when she least expects it. Just remember: you did not hear it from me."
"No worries, big guy," Reese winked, thinking up evil plans for her scheming cousin.
To Be Concluded... :)
A/N - ooh! Didja like? Review please, I CRAVE feedback! *another trademark cheesy grin*
