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DISCLAIMER: I don't own CLAMP but they own Card Captor Sakura! Okay?! Okay!
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This chapter is for my friends, Luna-chan and Tomoyo-chan. Love you guys!

* : thoughts

Chapter 3: Reflections

Mirrors.

Fascinating, really, how they could reflect who you are and what was there.

She'd quit looking at mirrors two years ago, since her chemo started. Well, you really
couldn't blame a girl for not trying. Would you actually choose to look at a reflection
if all you saw was a girl whose skin was ghostly pale and whose hair was falling out
due to the radiation? Really. But that wasn't the only reason.

She didn't like looking at mirrors because reflected there, in her eyes, was her sorrow.

And she didn't want to see that.

She knew, in her heart, that she didn't have long enough to live on this world to rid
herself of the pain.

But she could deny it.

She wanted the people around her to remember her as cheerful, happy, and not tragic.

Her last exit in the final act of this play called Life.

They say mirrors reflect not only your physical confines. They also reflected your
soul, and what you held in your heart.

She raised her eyes to the glass and knew they were right.
~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~
The airport.

Corny as it may seem, the most pivotal moments of his very life had all happened in this location.

The noise of people, coming and going, airplanes landing and taking off, the intercom
announcing the flights, and people, saying goodbye or hello. All these provided the
background music to those moments of epiphany.

Here he had arrived once with a greedy heart and a stoic disposition. When he left, he was
a changed man. And all because SHE had taken the time to bring his over-inflated head
back to earth and teach him the values of friendship, life, trust.

And love.

Here he lost a fiancee, and gained a best friend. Here he experienced one of the best moments
of his life, and some of the worst moments of his life.

*"You will go to Japan, Xiao Lang, and recapture those cards. Family honor demands this."

"---Landing in Tomoeda, Japan---"

....................

"Always rememeber your promise to me, Syaoran, okay? You will marry me if you don't
find another girl to love!"

....................

".... I can't believe you broke your engagement with me BUT you still haven't told Kinomoto
how you feel! How dopey of you! You have to go get the girl now!"

....................

"... Umm... Syaoran-kun.... can I.... have that bear you're holding?"

"I promise to wait for you... no matter how long it takes!"*

And she did wait until his return. Only to push him away to hide a secret from him.

She'd almost succeeded, too.

He should've known. She was far too sacrificial for her own good, to want to push him away in
order for him not to see her pain.

And she knew him too much, because she knew that it would hurt him to see her like that, and so
she thought to hit him in one quick blow, reject him, push him away.

So that he would not get hurt everytime she was hurt.

He shook his head ruefully, sadly.

*Sakura, Sakura. You know me too well.*

One blow to him, a thousand to herself. In exchange for his peace and her sorrow for the next few years.

*Sakura, Sakura. I know you too well.*

....

*"Please.... erase me from your heart... forever!"*

Oh, she knew him so well, knew that if she hit him with that one last blow, push him away with that
much strength, he'd do as she expected. Walk away and never look back.

Smart girl, very smart. So talented that he didn't even think of it in the least 'til now. She'd learned
to hide her emotions well, too well. He hadn't even seen it coming.

....

*"Sakura-chan has... leukemia."*

.....

*Well, sorry, Sakura. Your plan didn't work after all. I'm back, I'm here, and I still love you.*

*I always will.*

*So don't die on me yet, Princess.*
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Touya sighed as he closed the door softly on his sisters room.

He had found her staring listlessly out at the winter night again. He tried to analyze that. It was not only
during winter that she was like that. Every day, every season, when he'd find her alone, she was staring
outside, emerald eyes blank.

But it WAS every winter that it seemed that her smiles grew less in intensity, her laughter lacked heart,
and the glow in her eyes dimmed considerably.

Touya didn't believe this was due to the sickness eating away at his sister's body.

Something else had broken her spirit, but it was not the disease. And it had broken her at the same time
the illness had struck.

Why did it have to be his sweet, beautiful sister being thwe one claimed? She had done nothing wrong.

It should've been him.

Yes, he would rather suffer and die in the place of his only sister.

If only to protect her from that much.

If only to protect her from everything.

He wondered what would happen if life were that way.

Sakura would cry and weep, but she would be alive, and that was all that mattered to him. Because as long as
she had life, she could move on and still be happy.

He began to walk out of the hospital, seeking solace from his sorrow. He saw his father's car pull up, so he
waved and started for home.
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".... Sakura-chan?"

Sakura turned to him with those beautiful emerald eyes of hers, and he saw in her, right there...

*Nadeshiko.*

"Hello, otou-chan," she said. "How was your day?"

*"Hello, Fujitaka. How was the university today?"*

"Fina, just fine. How are you?" he replied.

She smiled, a smile so alike her mother's in every way. "Nothing happened. Same as usual."

"Did you take your medicine?"

"Yes, 'tou-chan."

*"Yes, Fujitaka."*

"And you didn't stress yourself?"

"No, I didn't, 'tou-chan."

*"I didn't, Fujitaka."*

Same smile, same eyes, same beauty. Same sweet disposition. Same warm laugh.

And now it was the same illness now claiming his daughter's life as it had claimed his Nadeshiko's.

*Iie. I will never let it happen.*

....

*"Anata... take care... of Touya... and Sakura. Promise me... that you will not let any harm come to
them. Protect them... my love... and... and...."*

"'Tou-chan, daijoubu ka?" Sakura asked.

*"Tell them I love them very much..."*

His daughter, practically the mirror image of his Nadeshiko.

*I will not lose my daughter.*

He had lost once, and he wasn't going to let it happen again.

He was going to fight.

He hugged his daughter abruptly, surprising her.

"'Tou-chan?"

"I love you, Sakura-chan."

*I love you, Nadeshiko.*