Author: Christy Anderson
You can contact me at kittyunlimited@go.com.
Disclaimer: All characters belong to Paramount minus Ensign Christy Anderson and a few selected insignificant characters
Author's Note: Hey it has been fun, but we're drawing near to the end. There's only one more part left, and then I have to start all over again, just like life. Thanks again for the positive feedback, everything is appreciated- Christy
* Added Disclaimer: The story of Peter Pan was written by James M. Barrie (1860 - 1937).
Time's Chosen: Part 6
Engineering was brightly lighted for 06:00 hours, almost too bright. Already crewmembers were hustling about with a variety of morning duty shift jobs. A few seconds after I walked in, B'Elanna came up from behind me. "Christy!" she called, whizzing by.
I turned around to face her, fear in my eyes. My talk with Peter had not left me any time to study. "Quiz?" I asked expectantly. "Test?" I questioned when she shook her head.
"Follow me," she called over her shoulder as she grabbed the lift to the upper deck of Engineering. I arrived at the top and set the lesson PADD aside. Thankfully, I wouldn't have to cram for that test until tomorrow. B'Elanna was keeping a furious pace, and behind her dutifully followed Lieutenant Chapman and Lieutenant Carey. "Chapman, I need the Warp Plasma injectors purged by 09:00 hours. It should have been done by now, and it shouldn't take but one person. No more excuses. Carey, I need full diagnostics underway immediately, the whole lot. Do as many as you can simultaneously. I trust you to get them done; take entire Engineering Crew Beta if you need them. We need to keep this ship moving at top speed, but at the same time I need to know what has to be fixed and oiled before we find ourselves face to face with the Borg. Got it?" Lieutenant Carey sped off. "Chapman!" she shouted when she realized that he was still following her, "what are you standing around for? Get moving on purging those injectors!" Chapman took to the nearest console. "Lieutenant Anderson," B'Elanna called, "over here."
I moved to the console she had indicated. On top stood a toolbox full of intricate diagnostic tools. "I want you to watch me carefully. For the next six hours, I need you to repeat the same command procedures consecutively. I'll cancel any more shifts that you have for today." Respectfully I nodded, it seemed as if she never took a breath, and B'Elanna began to tap away on the console buttons, initiating a power surge in the reaction core over loaders. "I detected a problem this morning in the over loading units, and I am going down there to see what's wrong. I have a feeling that I might have to replace the one unit, so the power surges you are supplying should be enough to force the second over loader to do twice the workload. Optimally, Voyager should really be brought to a halt, but Tuvok detected that blasted Borg Transwarp signature yesterday. If truth be told, I would rather we were not a sitting duck when the Borg come to assimilate us. Now, it is extremely important that you keep applying these surges at a rhythmic pace. I don't need to remind you what would happen if the Warp Plasma Conduits were suddenly backed up."
She moved aside expertly and I followed her lead by repeating the procedure twice flawlessly as she watched. The Chief Engineer nodded in approval. "Good, you'll start in a few minutes. I'll be back in a few hours to relieve you." She closed the toolbox on top of the console and set it on the floor. Kneeling down, she opened up a storage container and looked up at me with an evil twinkle in her eye. "Harry tells me you got a visit this morning from our guest," she began frankly, gracefully slipping from professional to personal.
"Peter? Yes, he talked with me for a while."
B'Elanna eyed me suspiciously as she continued to dig through the contents of the container. "More like hours," she joshed. "Neelix didn't open his kitchen until five minutes before 06:00 hours for fear of disturbing you and him. I should know; I waited in line outside long enough. Peter, is that his name?"
"Yes," I answered while moving to help her hold up the lid.
B'Elanna cocked her head to the side. "Is he on the level?" she asked, trying to politely keep her voice down.
Gratefully I stared into the eyes of my friend. She was genuinely concerned. "I hope so." At my words, B'Elanna smiled with relief. "You know he reminds me of my brothers," I continued.
B'Elanna stared at me. "I wasn't aware you had any siblings."
I shrugged. "I suppose I don't mention them as much. They moved out of the house when I was six to live with my aunt. When I was twelve, my older brother Karl was already out of the Academy and William had one more year to go."
B'Elanna nodded. "Although I was an only child, I had cousins their age, about. I never saw them much- didn't like them too much, come to think about it. Still, it was hard being the only one in the house. What's your favorite memory of them?"
At her words I raised an eyebrow. "Favorite memory?"
B'Elanna smiled wistfully. "Come one, you have to have at least one."
I nodded. "Okay this might sound a tad strange, but my favorite memory of my brothers is my twelfth birthday. I got a soccer ball, and for the first time in years, my brothers stayed all afternoon and taught me to play."
B'Elanna laughed. "Soccer? Is that anything like Klingon Gormball?"
Shyly I nodded. "Only it's not a human skull- it's a hollow leather ball. Soccer is my favorite sport today, and I think its all because of my brothers. They were never at home; the times my brothers came to visit were few and far between. Now that I think about it, my brothers probably knew about me and were too disturbed by the situation to stay at home. I guess they tried to help me though. I mean, often when they did visit, they stole me away in the early hours of the morning when I had a doctor's appointment."
My companion's face grew somber. "Didn't you mention once that Kenneth and his sister lived with you?"
"Yeah," I replied, "they did. It was sort of an apprenticeship deal. Their father couldn't support them, and Kenneth was willing to work. My family took them in and they soon became a part of ours."
B'Elanna sighed. "It was just my mother and I; we had such different opinions that our home was frequently explosive after my father left. Finally at seventeen, I couldn't take anymore and packed after one of our fights. I fended for myself until I graduated from high school and entered the Academy. I thought I had it all figured out, but I suppose you've heard about how it really turned out. When I quit the Academy out of sheer frustration, I couldn't find it in my heart to go back home, and so I took a job aboard a Bajoran freighter."
It had never occurred to me how hard B'Elanna had really had it. "Bajoran freighter?" I asked suddenly. "Weren't they the sworn enemies of the Klingon Empire at one time?"
A warning alarm went off five feet from us. Like a startled animal, B'Elanna targeted the sound in seconds. She relaxed when she saw Lieutenant Chapman on it, and when she let her breath out, her shoulders sagged. I had never seen her so tired, so tired that I could almost feel it. Realizing she had become distracted, B'Elanna looked up at me, muddled. "Um at the time, the Bajorans were more concerned with winning their war against the Federation. It was a sort of a makeshift job. They were searching for a top assistant engineer to do the night shift, and I found out about it accidentally when I was working as a shuttle mechanic in the Central Plaza on Mars. Some gossiping customer came in talking about it like the newest scandal. I remember how thrilled I was," B'Elanna shook her head and laughed at herself. "I was only making enough to eat two meals a day, and I jumped at the chance, Bajorans or not. I resurrected my Starfleet uniform, stoles some convincing pips, trying to pull an act as a turncoat officer."
"They believed you?" Chapman asked incredulously. Simultaneously, both of us turned to stare at him. Until that moment, neither of us had realized that he was listening.
Surprised, B'Elanna nodded. "They were more than happy to oblige to my terms. Largely, I really hadn't an inkling of what to do besides the basics- it was all one large lie. I knew a few tricks, and I used them to my advantage. They were so impressed by ability to recycle old warp plasma that they hired me immediately. For a while it was touch and go. At first, I couldn't tell the difference between a Warp Core Failure and a Warp Core Meltdown. Most of my engineering education hadn't come from the Academy but from my friends Max and Jason. They knew all the illegal tricks of the trade." B'Elanna bit her lip to stop the smile that was creeping over her face. No doubt that pair of friends had been as much trouble as Harry and Tom were today.
"I'm sure that you improvised," I said to gently snap her out of her reverie.
The half-Klingon engineer gave a slight affirmation. "Working for the Bajoran Underground Empire, I learned as I went along, escaping trouble by a centimeter as often as I could. A nice Bolian engineer finally caught on and showed me a few things. When the ship crashed into a trading port five years later, I thought it was over. Most people on duty that night in the Engine Room died; I barely managed to escape with my life. While wandering for a few months, Chakotay found me through some of his contacts. He said that he had been told I was a thrifty and unconventional engineer, but one of the best, and he offered me a job with the Maquis. Those years were probably the best in my life. Even on the Bajoran freighter I hadn't fit in, and Starfleet was just as confining, yet somehow I ended up here."
"Best of us all," I finished for her.
B'Elanna laughed. "I still don't know how I did it. There were many times I was ready to pack my bags and go home defeated. Honestly, I suppose that I owe it all to the curiosity my Father fostered while he still lived with us. It was my blessing and my salvation."
"You did it," I said reassuringly. "Your father and your mother would be proud to see how far you've come."
A smile came to her face. "Somehow Tom thinks that too." She finally located the instrument she was looking for, grabbed it as fast as grease lightning, and nimbly shut the lid. "Begin those power surges, Lieutenant. You're in charge until I return."
Somewhat disheveled and mentally tired, I arrived in my quarters at 13:00 hours. I must have repeated that sequence over a million times. I felt that if I closed my eyes, I would begin to dream about it, or that if I stopped paying attention, I would find my hands still performing the maneuvers over imaginary panels. With a salad in my stomach, I collapsed on the bed, quite happy to have no more shifts.
"Tired? Oh, too bad I was really hoping I could take you on an excursion."
Instinctually, I sprung off the bed with a phasor in my hand. Himmel Heavens, it was only Peter. Catching my breath, I swallowed to recoat my dry throat. "What are you doing?"
Peter pulled out a bundle of a dozen roses from behind his back. "Like Peter swept young Wendy off to Never Never Land, I have too brought my pixie dust for such a trip. For you, my Wendy," he offered suavely with a small melodramatic bow.
His antics caused me to giggle hysterically. "What wwhat are you talking about?" I managed between gasps of air.
"I want to show you something."
The answer had come straight out, simple, but its simplicity simply swept me away. I caught something so profound in his blue eyes as his gaze held me captive for nearly a minute. In fear, I took a clumsy step backwards. Snapping me from my daze, the door chimes buzzed. "Come on, Christy, open up," Tom's voice commanded.
Peter took no time to hesitate and grabbed my arm.
"What are you doing?" I shrieked in astonishment. From outside the door, I could hear the sound of Tom punching in the entrance code.
"Think happy thoughts," Peter explained as we swirled away in a flash of white.
With the white radiance fading, the first thing I noticed was the two stars high up in the sky, most likely a binary system. When my eyes had adjusted, I glanced at my surroundings. To my surprise, we were at the edge of a deep canyon. A river of the deepest blue, a blue matching the shade of Peter's eyes cut through rapidly, little white caps of waves hither and thither. Surrounding both banks was a copious and lush amount of green growth. The sky was cloudless and pale pink, a sign of an oncoming suns'set. A great bird circled overhead, reminding me of a bald eagle, just as magnificent and just as noble. "Spirit, where is this place?" I quoted tranquilly.
Peter looked at me cautiously out of the corner of his eye. "Dickens?" he asked curiously. "Charles Dickens?"
I nodded almost imperceptibly, still awed. "A great writer"
My fragment traveled through the air, and echoed back off the canyon wall. Peter seemed visibly pleased with himself, knowing how much I was enjoying this sight. "Second star to the right and straight on til morning," he responded suddenly.
I raised my right eyebrow in an amused expression. "Peter Pan's Never Never Land exists only in a child's imagination- but is this yours?"
"Aye, this is my Never Never Land. It is particularly beautiful in the morning at suns'rise there are morning passion winds You've never had such a feeling. There is no place like where you stand- the center of the universe, on a planet called Enkarri," he responded suddenly.
His reply took a while to register. "Center?" I asked, the reality hitting me like a brick.
His eyes lit up as he tumbled with unrestrained laughter at my naivety. The dimples in his cheeks gleamed as he chuckled deeply. I began to laugh at the mirthful sight of him, in spite of myself. Inexplicably my laughter set us both off, and we both laughed, crying, until our sides split, not one clue as to what was so apparently funny. At ease, I didn't even protest when Peter pulled me off to sit in the shade of a tree.
When my heartbeat returned to normal, I repeated my inquiry. "Center? I thought you never really saw this place."
Peter gazed at me strangely. "How can one really see what lies before his eyes if he has no one to share what his eyes see?"
I thought about his reply for only a moment. "How do you know about Peter Pan?"
Peter's eyes positively gleamed with sinister pride. "I spent the past four days researching the tale," he answered as if it were painfully obvious. His bizarre concept of time was scarcely surprising me anymore. I lay back on the grass and closed my eyes. For a time, I was content enough to draw in the fresh air in deep, slow, and relaxing breaths. I half feared that I might awake from these strange events as from a vision. The corner of my lips turned up in a small smile. I was waiting for him to say something, for it was he who had sought me in the first place. "It was appropriate," he mumbled softly. I simply nodded- it seemed to be a stalemate between the two of us, but I remember that my Father had always said that silent patience would pay off. "It got me thinking about what you said yesterday," his voice continued. "Eternity is terribly dull by one's lonesome."
I lifted my hand up to cover my smile. "Is it now? I thought an immortal life was the only way to go."
Peter glared at me, and then strangely snatched up my hand to hold it. "To tell you the truth, Christy, when I first got involved in your life, I used to wait beside your bedside, invisible, listening to the conversations you had with your father, just like Peter Pan. You said something once to your Father that I shall never forget: We don't live very long, do we? But Father, in our short time, how is it that we are able to change infinity?'" Peter's voice broke off.
I remembered that conversation- my friend Jared had died from MS. His parents had asked me to come to the funeral. During the service, when his Mother was giving the eulogy, I had leaned over in my Father's ear and asked, "Warum bevölkeren Sie Würfel? Why do people die?" My Father had given me a hug "Ich weiß nicht, Tochter, aber ich nehme an, daß es etwas Grund hinter ihm gibt I do not know, Daughter, but I suppose there is some reason behind it."
His words had caused me to wonder all day, and in the end it wasn't death that had seemed so important at all- it was how we lived our life.
Peter sighed "I don't know what it was, but at that moment, I was drawn to you. I kept watch over you as good as Nana, and try as I might, I couldn't stop the dominoes from tumbling." Tears were pouring down his cheeks now. He squeezed my hand tightly, hanging on for dear life, and alas so tight I thought that once I got back to Voyager I might have to pay the Doctor a visit.
"I'm here," I comforted softly. "And thanks to you, I'll have a chance to change all that."
But Peter didn't seem to be seeing me. Alarmed, I used my free hand to pry loose his death-grip. "You were the first charge I lost"
"And I'm here," I reiterated cautiously. "Peter, its all right."
Peter's face grew angry. "Is it? Or did you only hit the tip of the iceberg this morning?"
I shook my head. "I have no idea what you are talking about! Why don't you start from the beginning, calmly"
Peter jammed his fist into the ground. "You were right! I spent every moment I had right by your side, invisible, and in the end it still wasn't enough time."
I could only stare at my Guardian. "Peter" I murmured sympathetically.
"Isn't that name appropriate? Is this to be my curse?" The words that were on the tip of my tongue were lost to his grief. "When Peter came back, it was too late- Wendy had already grown up. I never before challenged this existence- it seemed to be the only way to go. But now I see it for what it is- a curse. I am damned to lose all whom I care about in life There has to be someway, someway to stop it"
I grabbed his hands forcefully, not wishing the madness to go on any longer. "Stop it!" I yelled. "There is no way. Even if you spent every moment in my life by my side, and in the end you used your powers to go back in time and start over- you might have my company, but you would not be prolonging anything. My life is a finite unit of time. Peter, in the end, you would have me so confused, that you would only torment my existence. Would that be the kind of relationship you would like to have? There is"
"Come away with me, Wendy."
The words, again, were only a simple plea. If it had not been for the adrenaline pumping through my system, I wouldn't have dared to reply at all. "No!"
"Oh, Christy we could be two spirits you and I. Have you not noticed the difference in you existence? I have displaced you from time, to be here. Here is where Time has no power- I have cut you loose from the furious tapestry. You could live an eternity like this."
For a split second, I recognized the absence of time ticking away. He was right, he had loosed me temporarily from the ever-forward march; it felt like a deadened sort of unearthly sensation. I shook my head in shock. "I have to return, Peter. There is no choice. There are people there that depend on me."
Peter cried out in anguish. "I haven't felt like this since the beginning of my consciousness. You have given me the wisdom to truly live. We could be entirely happy and free from burden."
"There is no choice, Peter. Please don't make me say that again. What was all that stuff you said about second chances? I was given a second chance, Peter, and I have to believe that was for a reason. If not for anything else, I must return for that reason."
The desperateness in Peter's eyes flickered and died. "I apologize," he said hastily and contritely. "I lost my head."
I placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. "People live but a very short time, Peter. Our lives are but a shadow from death. Like my Father once told me, the universe has its purpose, I suppose. If time could be bottled or slowed, we would have such things now. And while you live forever, Peter, one day, as dictated by the law of nature, I will die. It is a fact that you witnessed firsthand."
Peter hung his head. "Then you agree; my subsistence is cursed. Why have an immortal life if all you will have to endure is unending pain and loss?"
I shrugged. "Why is there death? Who could answer such a question? I asked my Father once, and he didn't know. However, it exists, Peter, and for people like me, it is the only end. But I think that there must be some good in death to outweigh the bad."
Peter looked up and met my gaze, there was raw pain in those eyes that stabbed intensely into my soul.
"Father always said it was quality over quantity," I explained patiently. "In life, it matters not how long you spend with a person. You could know someone for an eternity, and another someone for only five minutes, and the experience would still be as profound. No, Peter, what matter's is what you took, what you remember about the times when they were alive. What matters is that you made the most out of every moment you were given with that individual, for even after their death, their spirit remains alive in yours. If you have made the most with your life, and have taken the most out of knowing others, than that is all you can ask for."
There was almost an hour of silence after I finished. The suns long went down from the sky, and a haze of stars shined above us. While we sat in such stillness, Harry's advice about the clusters came to mind. We were all one family. Hadn't Tom told me that once before? I berated myself over having conveniently forgotten it until now. Why hadn't I talked to someone when the pain had become unbearable to endure alone? Surely others had lost plenty a person like Tre'kent, a person who completed your soul in every way. I thought about the long weeks of his absence Maybe after enough practice, I would reach him one day. Maybe, just maybe, I would be able to hear him, for our telepathic bond was useless over such large and indeterminable distances. For a while, I felt chagrined; the depression was returning like a plague. It was so easy to fall into self-pity. Eventually I sat up, not out of physical discomfort, but rather in a larger effort to clear my mind. There would be lonely and hard times ahead for sure, especially as I began to open up my heart, but these trials and tribulations could be dealt with as they came, and with friends.
Still, something wasn't complete.
"Know what I miss most?" Peter asked quietly.
I shook my head, not a clue as to what he spoke of.
"I miss the timely quality, the uncertainty about the next minute I remember the feeling of living, and I miss that. What do you miss about earth, something that you have not ever seen the equal of here in the Delta Quadrant?"
An answer that I did not even know that I had flew to my tongue. "I miss the rain. I miss being completely drenched from head to two in H2O, fully clothed, twirling around and splashing in puddles, catching raindrops on my tongue, and feeling it just replenish my spirit."
Peter laughed a little. "Ah, and to think young Wendy missed the mermaids and the adventures." His voice trailed off, and he stared at me intently. Unwearyingly he waited, until I had the courage to meet his gaze. "I tell you, Christy, it is no small miracle you spoke to me, that you had me understand tonight. You have have no no have no idea how large is the magnitude of your deed. I want to repay you with a wish"
"A wish?" I interrupted. "Peter, Wendy had no such wish."
Peter put his one finger over my mouth to silence me. "You can choose anything that you like, and it shall be done. But do me a favor, and consider carefully Unfortunately, it must be something that affects you alone, or mostly just you. I would never be allowed to work anything as wide scale as transporting Voyager back to the Alpha Quadrant Just think, dear Wendy, just think And when you have made a decision, call for me from your heart. But don't wait, Wendy, don't wait until you're all grown up."
Within a flash, he was gone, and I stood back in my quarters, with a dozen red roses in hand, just as Tom burst through the door. "Didn't I hear voices?" he asked with concern.
"Peter just left," I answered, staring at twelve roses that I was sure would never die. Gingerly I placed them on the nightstand, their sweet smell filling the room. I was grateful that Peter had reintegrated me at the moment he had displaced me- this way there was no need for explanations. Mercy, did it feel great to be living again.
Tom raised an eyebrow but didn't breathe a word. I turned back and stared at him, dressed in a Starfleet physical training uniform, Grays, they were called. He had two wooden staffs in his hand. "Want to join us?" he questioned excitedly. "Harry, B'Elanna, and I- we're all going to start lessons" I hesitated for a moment, used to withdrawing from all the activity. Tom saw the flash of uncertainty and backed away. "Unless," he continued, "you would rather be left alone"
The genuine look of uncertainty on usually suave features was enough to send me again into giddy laughter. "Not a chance, butterfingers," I quipped as I snatched a staff out of his hands and ran down the hall.
To be continued
