Chapter 3
"Spike…"
"Yup." Buffy didn't turn to Willow but kept her eyes on the TV screen. It was the first real time they had been alone together, because Willow had brought Amy back by accident and there was the whole problem of her breaking up with Tara.
Buffy didn't really want to talk, preferring to watch Dawson's Creek, the semi crappy show that kept her mind off slaying.
"Please Buffy?"
"I know you want to talk Will, and I don't know if I can say much more than I have. I don't know you anymore. If I ever did. I think you're really messing up."
"I know. And it's all my fault you're messing up you're life too."
"Excuse me? Mine life is finally become unmessy. Spike is the one good thing that's happened to me since I came back to this rotten world."
"But he doesn't have a soul."
"If you don't mind Joey is finally going to sleep with Dawson. I want to watch."
"Buffy, you used to believe a soul was important."
"Well, it isn't." Buffy crossed her arms. "Shouldn't Tara and Dawn be back soon?"
"I thought you wanted to talk?" Willow asked in a hurt tone. "If you really don't I'm going to bed."
"Night." When Willow left Buffy drew her knees up to her chest, feeling like a lost child. It was these moments, a few each day since she had come back from LA that she wished she hadn't. Anything would be better than this. She looked around the living room, and noticed under a pile of TV guides a cassette tape. Her heart leapt with joy as Buffy grabbed it.
She had completely forgotten that she had a copy of her and Spike's songs with the music. Joe had given them each a copy but she thought she had lost it. She bet anything Dawn had gone through her stuff, because now she remembered Dawn wearing a shirt she brought, to LA. This one time she was grateful Dawn had overstepped her privacy bounds.
She carried the tape into the kitchen where an ancient cassette player sat on a shelf. Buffy popped the tape in and turned the volume up high. Her voice came out first, kind of wavery. She shuddered. A real manager would never want her. She fast forwarded until Spike's voice filled the room. It was raw, but full of pain and soul. She smiled at the pun. He really could sing. She listened to it again and when she went to turn it off Dawn was standing there.
"I-he sings well." Dawn said.
"You guys are back." Buffy dried her face and smiled at Dawn.
"I'm ok Buffy." She assured her sister, referring to an ugly episode with Willow, where the latter made a huge mistake. It was the majority of the reason Buffy was so upset with Willow. Willow wanted to make amends, and Buffy knew this but she was having trouble letting go. Dawn waved her arm. "I can't even feel it." She wandered over to the freezer. "We picked up ice cream the other day. Tara said I should save it to have with you. That's why she wouldn't let me get to much stuff at the movies."
"Did you see anything good?" Buffy asked trying to focus.
"We saw that new movie, with Brad Pitt. It was so good Buffy. You should come next time. I saw a box of snowcaps with your name on them."
"You know my weakness." Buffy laughed, putting her hand over her chest as if wounded. "I'm thankful that Tara stayed around for your sake."
"Me too. She's like a second sister. She and I became really close when you were-"
"I'm going to go to bed Dawn." Buffy stood up from the table abruptly. "Goodnight honey." Buffy bent down to kiss Dawn's hair.
"Wait a second. There was something Tara wanted me to ask you…What was it. Oh yeah. She had a question about your fights."
"My fights?"
"You've been winning right?"
"I'm alive aren't I?"
"But it's really easy. And you aren't really hurt?" Buffy frowned, in thought. Her left hand went to her right shoulder and felt a short scar. It was from one of the rough and tumbles with Spike. Now that she thought about it, he really was the only one who had hurt her. Sure she had a couple scratches but nothing as scar worthy as that.
"You could say that. Why?"
"She has this theory. She wouldn't even tell me. Well goodnight."
"Night." Buffy continued upstairs, a little bit scared of what Tara was thinking. What was wrong with her? Spike used to dance around her, torturing her with the question, until she finally gave into him. She would find out soon…
"Spike…"
"Yup." Buffy didn't turn to Willow but kept her eyes on the TV screen. It was the first real time they had been alone together, because Willow had brought Amy back by accident and there was the whole problem of her breaking up with Tara.
Buffy didn't really want to talk, preferring to watch Dawson's Creek, the semi crappy show that kept her mind off slaying.
"Please Buffy?"
"I know you want to talk Will, and I don't know if I can say much more than I have. I don't know you anymore. If I ever did. I think you're really messing up."
"I know. And it's all my fault you're messing up you're life too."
"Excuse me? Mine life is finally become unmessy. Spike is the one good thing that's happened to me since I came back to this rotten world."
"But he doesn't have a soul."
"If you don't mind Joey is finally going to sleep with Dawson. I want to watch."
"Buffy, you used to believe a soul was important."
"Well, it isn't." Buffy crossed her arms. "Shouldn't Tara and Dawn be back soon?"
"I thought you wanted to talk?" Willow asked in a hurt tone. "If you really don't I'm going to bed."
"Night." When Willow left Buffy drew her knees up to her chest, feeling like a lost child. It was these moments, a few each day since she had come back from LA that she wished she hadn't. Anything would be better than this. She looked around the living room, and noticed under a pile of TV guides a cassette tape. Her heart leapt with joy as Buffy grabbed it.
She had completely forgotten that she had a copy of her and Spike's songs with the music. Joe had given them each a copy but she thought she had lost it. She bet anything Dawn had gone through her stuff, because now she remembered Dawn wearing a shirt she brought, to LA. This one time she was grateful Dawn had overstepped her privacy bounds.
She carried the tape into the kitchen where an ancient cassette player sat on a shelf. Buffy popped the tape in and turned the volume up high. Her voice came out first, kind of wavery. She shuddered. A real manager would never want her. She fast forwarded until Spike's voice filled the room. It was raw, but full of pain and soul. She smiled at the pun. He really could sing. She listened to it again and when she went to turn it off Dawn was standing there.
"I-he sings well." Dawn said.
"You guys are back." Buffy dried her face and smiled at Dawn.
"I'm ok Buffy." She assured her sister, referring to an ugly episode with Willow, where the latter made a huge mistake. It was the majority of the reason Buffy was so upset with Willow. Willow wanted to make amends, and Buffy knew this but she was having trouble letting go. Dawn waved her arm. "I can't even feel it." She wandered over to the freezer. "We picked up ice cream the other day. Tara said I should save it to have with you. That's why she wouldn't let me get to much stuff at the movies."
"Did you see anything good?" Buffy asked trying to focus.
"We saw that new movie, with Brad Pitt. It was so good Buffy. You should come next time. I saw a box of snowcaps with your name on them."
"You know my weakness." Buffy laughed, putting her hand over her chest as if wounded. "I'm thankful that Tara stayed around for your sake."
"Me too. She's like a second sister. She and I became really close when you were-"
"I'm going to go to bed Dawn." Buffy stood up from the table abruptly. "Goodnight honey." Buffy bent down to kiss Dawn's hair.
"Wait a second. There was something Tara wanted me to ask you…What was it. Oh yeah. She had a question about your fights."
"My fights?"
"You've been winning right?"
"I'm alive aren't I?"
"But it's really easy. And you aren't really hurt?" Buffy frowned, in thought. Her left hand went to her right shoulder and felt a short scar. It was from one of the rough and tumbles with Spike. Now that she thought about it, he really was the only one who had hurt her. Sure she had a couple scratches but nothing as scar worthy as that.
"You could say that. Why?"
"She has this theory. She wouldn't even tell me. Well goodnight."
"Night." Buffy continued upstairs, a little bit scared of what Tara was thinking. What was wrong with her? Spike used to dance around her, torturing her with the question, until she finally gave into him. She would find out soon…
