Eleison
A Gundam Wing Fanfic
By:
Sailor Seraphim



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Author's Notes:

Please see Chapter One for full disclaimers and Notes.

"Eleison" means "have mercy."

SPOILERS for the TV Series, Endless Waltz and Episode Zero.

WARNINGS: 1x2, major angst, bad language, violence, death, shounen ai, and suicide... in no particular order. Timeline is roughly 3 years after Mariemaia, making it AC 200.

Enjoy!

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Chapter Two -- Chasing After Nothing




It was all pain and blood and darkness.

Duo moaned, blinking up at the leafy green canopy above him. He realized that he was lying flat on his back on the forest floor. He twitched carefully, testing himself for injuries. Besides some minor wounds, he was okay. Duo sat up, giving in the urge to retch when his whole world tilted and lurched in front of his eyes. That was a bad sign; he probably had a concussion. The American finally recovered and took stock of his situation.

The last thing he remembered before blacking out was that the jeep had run into some sort of mine or explosive that had caused them to veer off the paved road and into the forest. Indeed, as Duo surveyed the wreakage of the vehicle and pulled himself from under the twisted mass, the American knew that if it hadn't been for the jeep absorbing most of the impact, he would be dead. But... Duo clearly remembered seeing Heero being thrown free of the jeep...

Heero.

Duo pulled himself to his feet as best he could, nearly falling down again as his injured legs screamed at the abuse and started to bleed fresh. But only one thought prevailed in Duo's mind: he had to find Heero. Maybe he had been luckier... Heero had survived self-destructing Wing; surely being thrown out of a car would be a piece of cake compared to that.

Heero was strong, insanely so. It was because of Heero's seeming inability to die that had attracted Duo to him in the first place. Having been surrounded by death all his life, Duo had felt an instant attraction for the young man who could laugh in Death's face and get away with it. Duo still lived with the overwhelming fear that his love was a curse -- that all those who loved him would be taken away before their time. But now, four years into their relationship, and Heero Yuy was still alive and kicking. It had made Duo hope that maybe he was not cursed afterall... that maybe, Heero was strong enough to survive his love. Still, Duo had never allowed himself to say that deadly word to his lover; he had even gone so far as to not allow Heero to speak it to him. It had confused the Japanese man at first, until he realized how overwhelming Duo's fear of abandonment was. The two men had never said they loved each other, and now Duo was threatening to choke on his tears at the thought of never saying it to Heero at all.

The braided man stumbled through the forest blindly, heading in the general direction of where he thought the road lay.

"Heero?" he called out, his voice raspy from the smoke. "Heero?! Where are you?!"

"D-Duo...?"

The American nearly missed the hoarse hissing of his name, and really, he had stumbled onto Heero almost on accident. Duo nearly cried when he saw Heero's body, laying awkwardly in the thick undergrowth of the forest.

"Oh... Oh God... Heero..." Duo whimpered, dropping to his knees and crawling to where his lover lay prone. He ran one dirty hand down Heero's face, crying out when his hand came back sticky with blood.

Prussian eyes fluttered open. "Duo? Isss... issat... you...?"

"Yes... oh, Heero. It's me. Oh my God..."

Heero's hand reached out, finally releasing the deathhold on the pistol, and gripped Duo's tightly. "Duo... what's wrong?"

Biting his lip, Duo just shook his head. "It's okay... it's gonna be okay, Heero. I just... I just gotta pull you out from there, to some place clearer. But... I... I don't wanna... hurt you..."

Heero closed his eyes. "It's okay, Duo. Just do what you need to do. I'll survive."

//Oh God, I hope you do,// Duo thought. Taking hold of his lover's body as gently as possible, Duo managed to pull him free of the tangled bushes and onto a clearer space, wincing in sympathy as he heard his lover cry out in pain. Laying on hard-packed dirt wasn't very conducive to the healing process, but it was slightly better than keeping Heero tangled in the bush. Then his hands flew, ripping at his shirt and trying to stave off the massive bleeding coming from his lover. Somewhere in the back of his mind, Duo knew it was in vain. Even if he could staunch all the wounds littering Heero's arms and legs, the Japanese man would never survive. Because, the wound that had made Duo nearly burst into tears, was the large splinter of metal protruding from Heero's abdomen. Probably a piece of the jeep when it had crashed into the tree and exploded. From the way Heero was behaving, his lover probably didn't even know -- couldn't FEEL -- the massive injury in his stomach.

"You're quiet," Heero rasped, opening his glazed Prussian eyes once more. "How bad is it?" When Duo balked, Heero managed to glare. "Don't lie to me, Duo. Not now. Tell me how bad it is."

Duo shook his head, violet eyes fierce. "It's bad, Heero. Real bad. Just... just... save your strength. I called HQ... they'll be here any minute and..."

"Duo." The American winced. "You've never lied before... I don't want you to start now. Tell me."

At that, Duo burst into tears even though he knew it would upset his lover further. "Oh God, Heero... it's... you're... Heero! Just shut the fuck up and save your strength, dammit!"

Duo managed to regain tenuous control over himself and stared into Heero's eyes.

"I'm not going... going to make it, am I?" Heero asked quietly, his voice catching in mid-sentence.

Duo didn't answer.

"You don't have to try to make it better for me, Duo. I ca-can't feel my legs. Th-that either means I'm paralyzed of they've been ba-badly da-amaged. I can ta-taste the blood i-in m-my mouth. Th-that means I-I've got inter... nal injuries..."

"GODDAMMIT, SHUT THE FUCK UP, HEERO!"

Duo slapped his hands over his mouth. He was shocked with his outburst. But he couldn't take it. He couldn't listen to Heero rattle off his injuries like he was reading the weather forecast. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry," he muttered.

There was silence again.

"Duo?"

The American jumped, his fingers tightening over Heero's hand. "Y-yeah?"

"I..."

"What, Heero?"

"I... never told you that I loved you."

Violet eyes widened in shock. "Don't... don't you dare start now!" Duo exclaimed. This wasn't happening. This wasn't happening. It wasn't.

Heero just smiled. "I... know that you never wanted me to say it, Duo. We've been together for... four years and we've never said it to each other."

"... dammit... Heero... please..."

"You were always afraid that loving me would kill me. You never said it outloud. I didn't either. Guess we couldn't cheat Death that way, ne? I love you, Duo."

"... Heero..."

"I... I can't... see... Duo... kiss me... one last time..."

Duo trembled, but leaned down, brushing his lips against his lover's. The taste of blood on his lips almost made him pull back, but the thought that this was the last kiss he was ever going to share with Heero made him desperate. He felt Heero's mouth on his, felt the warmth of their tongues dueling with each other. For one last time, Duo wanted to lose himself in Heero's kiss and never wake up again. Reluctantly, Duo pulled away, dropping gentle kisses across Heero's brow and now-sightless Prussian eyes.

"Duo?"

"Yes, Heero?"

"I love you."

"I know, Heero."

"... everything... that I am... my heart... bo-body... s-soul... it belongs... to you..."

Duo started to cry again, carefully wrapping his arms around Heero's body, cradling his lover's body in his arms. "Heero... Heero, I love you... love you..." the braided man sobbed into Heero's ear, hoping it wasn't to late to say those words.

Heero's lips curved into a smile.

And he didn't say anything anymore.





-- To Be Continued --