Runaway Fox
Chapter Eighteen: In My Darkness
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter because he belongs to J.K. Rowling.
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Ron didn't know where he was. It was dark and cold. He could feel his abdomen throbbing and there was blood coming out of it. He was alone. Totally alone and utter defenseless. He couldn't tell where he was. He was trapped in darkness. The only things he could hear were passing voices. He could hear Marcus' angry words again causing him to shake. The only thing that calmed him back down was Mari's voice.
For a moment, he had sank lower it seemed. He could hear the sound of Jordan Scott's gentle voice. He heard Simon, Jenny, and Becky's voices telling him to wake up. How could he? He didn't know how. He didn't know where he was. Ron started breathing very hard and his heartbeat started to get faster.
What he didn't know was while that was happening Jenny Scott was sitting with him as he laid there waiting for him to wake up at that time? The machines started going off as his heart started go into cardiac arrest. The medical team came into his room and stabilized him quickly.
"Will he wake up soon?" asked Mrs. Scott.
"There's no telling. He was clinically dead for nearly two minutes. All we can do now is pray that he wakes up. We can't rush it. He has to do it on his own. The next couple of hours are critical," said the doctor.
Ron heard none of this. He was still trapped inside his own mind. He struggled to breathe and then everything was fine again when they stabilized him. "WHAT IS THE POINT OF ALL THIS?! SOMEONE HELP ME!" screamed Ron in a helpless voice. The struggle continued.
"I don't want to be alone," he whispered.
Ron woke up with a start. Hermione woke up too. He was sweating and heaving as if he couldn't get any air. "Ron? Ron? Are you…it was just a dream, Ron," said Hermione in a shaky voice. He looked like he had woken up from a frightening dream. She stood up and drew the curtains open and wrenched the windows open to let air in. He had his head in his hands. Hermione reached over to touch him, but he pulled away from her even before she could.
"Don't touch me," he was gasping for air. Hermione had a frightened look on her face. She had seen behavior like this before. It was post traumatic stress disorder. She had seen it in some of her fellow Aurors. She had suffered from the same thing before.
During a routine disbanding of a ring of Dark Arts users, Hermione got separated from Seamus. They managed to capture her, but they didn't use the any of the Unforgivable Curses on her. No, they drew blood on her by making several cuts on her arms and legs with surgical sharp daggers. They used her blood on some of the rituals instead of their own. It took almost forty eight hours to find her. Sirius pulled her out himself and took her to St. Mungo's Hospital. The incident was sealed for confidential reasons. Harry came running from the middle of a Quidditch match to come and see her. He stayed by her side until she woke up. The cuts were healed up, but the scars on her psyche were harder to heal. Harry stayed by her side throughout the next couple of weeks until she recovered. That was when she learned that the Death Eaters didn't care whether or not she wanted to spare even their live, so she learned how to fire a gun and to cast more complex hexes and curses to throw at them. However, for the awful things that happened to Hermione, she didn't have a wound on her that was permanent like Ron's. She wasn't the only person there who was getting tortured. No, the Death Eaters were having more fun with the Muggles they had captures and she was unconscious for most of it. She had completely healed from the incident for the most part, except for a few flashbacks.
"Ron, I'm here. Calm down," she said in a soothing voice. His head shot up to look at her. She came to him and gently rubbed his back. "What was your dream about?"
"The injury that Harry was talking about. It's this," he answered as he ran his hand on his scar again.
"I know it's a bullet wound. I've seen some myself. It looked like it hit some important stuff," said Hermione as she studied him. He said nothing as he stood up and walked to the bathroom. Hermoine pointed her wand at Ron's clothes that were hanging in the closet and pressed them neatly.
Ron came out and put his clothes back on. "I have to go and get ready to back to work. I'm going to apparate back to my house. Goodbye, Hermione," he said softly.
"Goodbye, Ron. Have a good day at work," she said as she kissed him on the cheek. He made no move to kiss her back. He simply apparated out of her room. Hermione realized that Ron was trying to re-learn how to feel anything again. She sat on her bed and would have stayed that way if the phone hadn't rang.
"Hello?" she said.
"Hermione?" said Harry.
"Hey, Harry. Good morning,"
"It doesn't sound good. Did Ron get you back to the hotel fine last night? Did anything happen? Are you all right? Is he all right? Am I asking too many questions for this hour in the morning?"
"Yes, Ron got me back to the hotel fine last night. Nothing happened. I'm tired. And I don't think Ron is all right. And no, you're not asking too many questions at this hour of the morning. Harry, did Ron tell you anything?"
"Um…not exactly. Well, yeah, he said some stuff. Why?"
"I saw something on him."
"What?"
"There was an old bullet wound on his stomach area."
"You saw that?"
"Yes, what happened to him?"
"Um…I'll tell you later. Ginny's starting to wake up and I think she'll want to use the bathroom." Harry hung up the phone. It must have been a strange sight in their room with the phone cord coming out of the bathroom and him trying to talk to her like that. Hermione chuckled despite herself.
~*~
Ginny woke up in bed and noticed that her husband wasn't with her. Harry usually had his arm draped around her waist. She looked around and noticed that the telephone on the nightstand on his side was gone. She saw that the cord led to the bathroom and the door was shut. She frowned. What was he hiding from her? "Harry?" she called out. She walked up to the bathroom door and it practically opened on her face. "What are you doing?" asked Ginny.
"Um…did you want to use the bathroom or phone?" asked Harry pleasantly. He had known his wife long before he married her to know that she was like her mother. She could scare anyone off with her temper.
"Neither. Who were you talking to?" she demanded in a dangerous tone.
"I was checking up on Hermione to see if she got home all right," answered Harry.
"Oh. Well, that's good. How is she?" asked Ginny.
"Fine. Actually, tired. I think she's been dealing with Ron," said Harry.
"Um…Harry I didn't want to ask anything about Ron personally in front of everyone last night, but I'm worried about him," said Ginny as she wrung her hands.
Harry sighed and told her a few things. He told her about Marcus and Mari, but left out how they had died. Ginny knew how Hermione felt about Ron; it wasn't that hard to figure out after he had gone, but she was surprised to learn that Ron had loved her before he had even left. Ginny expressed sorrow over what happened to Ron's friends. He was so far away from home when something that horrible happened. She knew that her husband didn't say everything, but she had a feeling that Ron had lost his friends in a painful way. The way Harry described Mari sounded like he had seen and heard her himself. How was that possible? Ginny also knew that Mari loved Ron and it must have been difficult for her. Ginny didn't think that she could bravely love someone and know that he wouldn't love her back.
"Ron's not coming back home, Harry. I thought about it myself. I didn't want to say anything to my parents. My mum is holding out for it. She's been hoping for it for five years. He's changed too much. He's never going to be the way he was before. I mean look at him yesterday. He knew so many things that made no sense to the rest of us. Well, maybe to you and Hermione; you've been around Muggles. Ron's magic is even different. This journey of his changed him. He's so different now. I can tell his my brother, but I can't tell much else. His eyes…they sometimes look so blank. Like a Dementor's kissed him," said Ginny with a shudder.
Harry couldn't help himself, but avoid her gaze. He came to her side and held her closely. All this time, Harry's life had been perfect. The only thing that was missing was his best friend and now it seemed as if he was going to have to fight to get him back in more ways than one. If that was going to happen, he was going to have more than a truce with Simon Scott…he was going to have alliance.
~*~
Ron was back at home and dressing in one of his tailor made suits. He had a dark navy blue shirt with dark gray slacks and matching jacket. He tied his black neck tie and lopped it closed. He took of his ear cuff and put it one the little china dish near the mirror. He looked dressed to kill.
He walked outside after eating breakfast and took his two seater to work. He had his sunglasses on to protect his eyes from the sun. He drove with such focus that he didn't even know how he got to work. It seemed to happen in a flash like he was on auto pilot. Ron went right passed his employees without greeting them good morning as he usually did. He had to get some work done. Carla said hello to him and gave him a detail schedule for the day, but he felt restless. "Where's Simon?" he asked her.
"Mr. Scott is currently in his laboratory, Sir," said Carla. Ron stood up and put the schedule on his desk. He needed to talk to Simon. Either him or Harry, but Harry was with Ginny, so that left only Simon. He walked over to Simon's lab. It wasn't the regular Warp Speed Labs; it was a Potions lab. Simon was a master at Potions after all just as Ron was a master at Transfiguration. Unlike Snape, Simon was a very happy brewer. He was known to brew butterbeer just for the heck of it. Ron pressed the code on the computerized door and whispered the locking spell on the hidden part of the lab.
Simon was currently humming to himself as he brewed some unknown potion. Ron shook his head. "Good morning, Simon," said Ron, surprising him. "Eep! Ron! You scared me!" he cried as he turned around. He was holding his wand in his hand ready to hex anyone who made the mistake of coming in unannounced.
"Good morning, Ron. How was your day yesterday?" asked Simon when he saw the look on Ron's face, he wasn't happy.
"What happened?" he asked.
"Hermione found it on me," answered Ron simply. Simon looked away from him. He knew what Ron was talking about. "Do you want to go to the roof and get some air?" asked Simon. It was also a private place to talk just like the lab, but the walls were constricting Simon.
"Fine," said Ron. They both walked out of the lab after Simon lifted his cauldron from the fire. They both walked up the stairs until they were on the roof top of the fifty story building. The wind whipped through Ron's air. "You didn't say you love her, did you?" asked Simon.
"You knew?" asked Ron with a surprised look. Of course, Harry would know, but he didn't think that Simon would. Simon wasn't as observant as Harry.
"Of course, I knew. I know that Mari confessed that she loved you. She told me so. At first, I got mad on her behalf, but she stopped me. She said that you loved someone else and that she understood. She really was something. I was mad because you didn't love her back. I loved Mari. I still do," confessed Simon. Ron was startled by this.
"You loved Mari?" asked Ron. "I'm sorry. I didn't know."
"Yes. That was another reason why I couldn't be your friend from the start. I saw you and Mari, talking to each other. I knew her from elementary school all the way to Ellsinore. That's how I know how you feel about Hermione. Don't waste your time, Ron. Don't push her away because you want to protect her. You of all people should know how precious time is," said Simon as his blue eyes met his. He walked off leaving Ron to ponder.
~*~
Weasleys were gathered for breakfast as Ginny and Harry kept quiet about what they had discussed about Ron. Everyone was uneasy because of Ron's behavior. Mrs. Weasley was probably the most effected by her son's coldness.
"What do you suppose Ron is doing now?" asked Percy out loud.
"He said he was going to work. I've seen his offices. They're huge. Even the lobby's something," said Charlie.
"I feel frosty whenever I'm around him," said Fred.
"Yeah. He was never like that at home. I mean at first I thought he was mad, but I think that's the way he really is. At least now he's like that," said George.
"What made him so cold?" asked Bill.
"Let's not talk about Ron that way," said Mrs. Weasley.
"If you think he's going to come home, you're wrong," said Harry softly. Everyone looked at him. "He's different now. This is his home and his life. He built everything on his terms and set his own expectations for himself. There's nothing you can do. You can either accept it and be happy for him. Or you can stay away from him and let him live his life. Those are the only options he's giving any of us."
"Harry, is there something you know that the rest of us don't? You did spend time with him by yourself. What happened?" asked Mr. Weasley.
"We played chess. He beat me every turn. And we caught up with each other," said Harry.
"Is there anything else?" asked Mr. Weasley calmly. He knew that his son-in-law was hiding something.
"He's Ron's best friend, if he knows anything…and if Ron said to keep it quiet, then Harry shouldn't say anything. If push too hard, Ron's going to push back," warned Ginny.
~*~
Ron wasn't a child who his parents could just drag back home. No, he was his own man. He wasn't going to back down from anything. The only thing he was running from was himself. Ron was startled to learn that Simon was in love with Mari before. He didn't tell her. In most cases, Ron's temper would have already decimated Simon because he knew that Simon had brought Hermione there behind his back. However, Simon did it to give him a chance that he never gave himself.
Ron thought about when Simon became a player. He was throughout college chasing girl after girl, but after Mari died he wasn't as active anymore. Ron never thought that Simon was capable of being so deep. Simon was more than just his best friend, protector, and advisor, he was his brother. Ron remembered how awful the weeks were following the shooting.
Ron was quiet. He didn't sleep, eat, or do much else. Mrs. Scott's mounting concern was that he was staring off into space. The doctor said that he had lost so much weight in such a short period of time and that he lack of sleep wasn't helping.
"I'm sorry for all the trouble I've burdened you with, Mrs. Scott," said Ron as he sat on the swinging bench outside on the back porch.
"You're not a burden. I think you should at least write your parents. Tell them where you are. You don't have to tell them what happened. Just tell them that you need them," said Mrs. Scott. Her heart ached for his parents, especially Mrs. Weasley.
"I don't want my parents seeing me like this. I don't want anyone seeing me like this. I should have died with them," he muttered.
"Do you know what I had to do to keep you alive?" asked Mrs. Scott as she took a seat next to him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. His muscles had deteriorated from his form.
"No," he whispered.
"I gave you my blood, Ron. Do you know what that makes you?" asked Mrs. Scott.
"What?" he rasped.
"A member of my family. You are a member of this family and your own. You and I are bounded by blood. I will always be there for you," said Jordan as she held him.
"Why? I don't get it," he said.
"No one has to get it, Ron" she said simply.
Ron got the cell phone out of his pocket and pressed the speed dial for Mrs. Scott, hoping that she wasn't out with her horses. "Hello?" asked the voice on the other end.
"Hello Mrs. Scott. How are you?" he asked.
"Hi Ron. I'm fine. I heard from Simon that your family is. Well, actually, Jenny called and said that we should all get together for dinner," said Mrs. Scott.
"That's what I was asking about. When do you want to get together?" asked Ron. It was Friday.
"How about to night? We can have the grill ready and everything. I'll just get some stuff for dinner," said Mrs. Scott.
"You shouldn't go through that much trouble, Mrs. Scott. Would you like me to bring anything?" asked Ron.
"No, just bring yourself and your family. I'd love to meet them," said Mrs. Scott.
"I think I can do that. Bye," said Ron as he hung up. For the first time that day, Ron actually smiled. Ron's thoughts drifted again to Hermione. Yes, he was living for Mari's sake because she didn't get to live, but he was alive because Hermione.
Cloaked in the darkness of his own mind, Ron had lost any hope of seeing any light. The voices had now stopped. He was now in silence. He could hear himself breathing, but there wasn't much else. His heartbeat hadn't changed in rhythm either. He looked around him in despair. He couldn't take it anymore. "Please someone help me. I don't want to be alone," he whispered futilely.
He could see something suddenly. She was surrounded in light. It wasn't Mari. Her hand held out to his. Her hand grabbed his. He grabbed back for fear that the person would disappear. He hadn't seen anyone the entire time. "Don't let go," he pleaded.
"I won't," said the voice. His eyes widened as the light engulf them both. The person who was leading him back from the darkness was Hermione. She faded away as soon as the light came for him and he lost his grip on her hand.
Ron opened his eyes to hear the sounds of the Muggle machines telling him that he was in some sort of hospital. He lost Hermione when he woke up.
"Simon's right," he whispered out loud to himself. Hermione was the one who pulled him out of the darkness. That's how he knew that he loved her more than life itself. She was everything. And he couldn't lose her now, especially because of himself. He was going to have to pull up his courage.
AN: I went to church on Sunday only to hear some of the sermon about Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. It was about Hermione's S.P.E.W. activities. I thought that it was interesting. Also people should check out http://www.unitedmedia.com/comics/getfuzzy/archive/getfuzzy-20020113.html this comic strip, which I thought was very funny. Also, the rest of this story should be posted much fast because I'm currently working on ideas for the new story. The prologue has been written for it. Does anyone want to see the prologue posted? Tell me.^_^
