This is another really, really bad X-Men sillyfic. Worse even then Stalker
Frog. I really wanted to write a sillyfic, but I couldn't think of
anything. So my grandmother suggested this plot, and I wrote it. Proof that
forcing youself to write never turns out well. Once again, this was written
summer of 2000, during the height of my X-Men obsession, late at night,
while high on sugar and caffeine. I'm in it, as a Spirit In The Sky.
Anything in ~'s is me talking.
~*~*~*~
The Revenge of Scott Summers
~*~*~*~
Scott Summers sat in his bedroom. He was plotting his revenge on all the people who were making his life miserable. "Let's see," he said. "First there's all the fanfiction writers who either make fun of me or kill me off every three seconds."
~Uh, Scott, you do realize you're talking about half the population here? OK, just checking.~
"Then ther's Remy. That man has grated on my last nerve." Suddenly an axe flew through the window and chopped off Scott's head. However since this is fanfiction and it's impossible to really kill someone in fanfiction, he quickly pulled himself back together.
~That's for plotting against my favorite character.~
"Okay, Emmie, you're going on my list!"
~Oh, I'm soo scared. Someone please save me.~
"OK" said Scott. "Next on the list. Jubilee. That kid has been the cause of one too many gray hairs."
~Well, I don't really care about Jubilee, so I'll let you get away with that one. But *you're* going to have to deal with Logan.~
Scott quickly crossed the name off the list. "OK, what about Storm? I'm tired of her trying to take over as leader all the time." Scott suddenly found himself eight feet in the air with his head through the ceiling. "Come on, Emmie. Don't tell me Storm's your second favorite."
~Um, Scott? That wasn't me.~
"Ororo?" "Yes?" said Storm sweetly from the doorway. "Oh. Sorry Emmie."
~You're forgiven.~
"So, um, Ro. You planning on letting me down anytime soon?" "Oh, certainly, Scott. Perhaps by Christmas." "OK. That's fair. I guess I can plot from up here." Storm left, after making sure that Scott was firmly stuck in the ceiling. "So who's next? I know - Bobby. I am sick and tired of constantly slipping on ice." He wrote Bobby's name on the list - well, the best that one can possibly write when their head and arms are in two different levels of the house. Then he realized whose room his head was in. "WHAT?!? Rogue has my picture on her dartboard? She's going up to the top of the list."
~Uh, Scott?~
*sigh* "Yes Emmie?"
~You just found the second favorite character.~
Scott fell to the floor, then bounced back up through the cieling and up another level into Bobby's room, where Bobby just *happened* to be changing his clothes. He came back down and landed on the bed. "Em. I know you're mad, but that was just cruel."
~I didn't know he was up there! Honest! (hehehehe)~
"So who's next on the list? Hmmmm, I guess that's about it." Scott stood up and opened the door. Outside stood the X-Men. "Um, hi, guys," he said as he took a good look at them. There was Wolverine with his claws extended, Rogue with her gloves *off* Gambit with a deck of cards in his glowing hand, along with Iceman, Jubille, Storm and Beast with particularly nasty looks in their eyes, and a horde of fanfiction writers armed with spiral notebooks and pens.
~Aren't I nice, Scott? I told them all about your plan so they could all be in the same place at the same time for you.~
*THUD!*
~Uh, sorry guys, it appears Mr. Summers is taking an unscheduled nap...~
Oops, knew I forgot something. The DISCLAIMER. This is not my story. Really. The characters aren't mine, they belong to Marvel. A friend of mine came up with the idea, and I borrowed the term "unscheduled nap" from my dad. See? Not mine.
~*~*~*~
The Revenge of Scott Summers
~*~*~*~
Scott Summers sat in his bedroom. He was plotting his revenge on all the people who were making his life miserable. "Let's see," he said. "First there's all the fanfiction writers who either make fun of me or kill me off every three seconds."
~Uh, Scott, you do realize you're talking about half the population here? OK, just checking.~
"Then ther's Remy. That man has grated on my last nerve." Suddenly an axe flew through the window and chopped off Scott's head. However since this is fanfiction and it's impossible to really kill someone in fanfiction, he quickly pulled himself back together.
~That's for plotting against my favorite character.~
"Okay, Emmie, you're going on my list!"
~Oh, I'm soo scared. Someone please save me.~
"OK" said Scott. "Next on the list. Jubilee. That kid has been the cause of one too many gray hairs."
~Well, I don't really care about Jubilee, so I'll let you get away with that one. But *you're* going to have to deal with Logan.~
Scott quickly crossed the name off the list. "OK, what about Storm? I'm tired of her trying to take over as leader all the time." Scott suddenly found himself eight feet in the air with his head through the ceiling. "Come on, Emmie. Don't tell me Storm's your second favorite."
~Um, Scott? That wasn't me.~
"Ororo?" "Yes?" said Storm sweetly from the doorway. "Oh. Sorry Emmie."
~You're forgiven.~
"So, um, Ro. You planning on letting me down anytime soon?" "Oh, certainly, Scott. Perhaps by Christmas." "OK. That's fair. I guess I can plot from up here." Storm left, after making sure that Scott was firmly stuck in the ceiling. "So who's next? I know - Bobby. I am sick and tired of constantly slipping on ice." He wrote Bobby's name on the list - well, the best that one can possibly write when their head and arms are in two different levels of the house. Then he realized whose room his head was in. "WHAT?!? Rogue has my picture on her dartboard? She's going up to the top of the list."
~Uh, Scott?~
*sigh* "Yes Emmie?"
~You just found the second favorite character.~
Scott fell to the floor, then bounced back up through the cieling and up another level into Bobby's room, where Bobby just *happened* to be changing his clothes. He came back down and landed on the bed. "Em. I know you're mad, but that was just cruel."
~I didn't know he was up there! Honest! (hehehehe)~
"So who's next on the list? Hmmmm, I guess that's about it." Scott stood up and opened the door. Outside stood the X-Men. "Um, hi, guys," he said as he took a good look at them. There was Wolverine with his claws extended, Rogue with her gloves *off* Gambit with a deck of cards in his glowing hand, along with Iceman, Jubille, Storm and Beast with particularly nasty looks in their eyes, and a horde of fanfiction writers armed with spiral notebooks and pens.
~Aren't I nice, Scott? I told them all about your plan so they could all be in the same place at the same time for you.~
*THUD!*
~Uh, sorry guys, it appears Mr. Summers is taking an unscheduled nap...~
Oops, knew I forgot something. The DISCLAIMER. This is not my story. Really. The characters aren't mine, they belong to Marvel. A friend of mine came up with the idea, and I borrowed the term "unscheduled nap" from my dad. See? Not mine.
