Me: Okay, now that we know who each of these gorgeous men are, it's time for the interviews!
Me: Bachelor number one. If you had a million dollars, what would you do with it?
Rick: I would buy more guns and bleach my teeth.
Me: Okay. Bachelor two, what would you do with a million dollars?
Jonathan: Buy more drinks.
Me: Anything else?
Jonathan: No. Just more drinks.
Me: Alrighty then! Bachelor three, a million dollars?
Ardeth: I would buy a gigantic safe and lock the Creature in there for all eternity. And buy more camels.
Me: And bachelor number four. What would you do with a million dollars?
Imhotep: What are dollars?
Me: Money.
Imhotep: Oh. I would buy the world and turn it all into Egypt.
Me: Well, we can dream, can't we?
Imhotep: What is that supposed to mean?!
Me: Okay, on to the next question. Bachelors, what would you do on a night alone with your girlfriend?
Rick: Polish my guns.
Jonathan: Drink.
Ardeth: Kill the Creature.
Imhotep: What was the question again?
Me: Okay, now it's time to meet today's eligible bachelorettes: Lady X, Lady Y, Lady Z, and Lady A!
Four girls walk up onto the stage. One of them is you!
Me: Okay, based on your interview answers, Ladies X, Y, Z, and A have been paired up with one of our bachelors, and you will be going for a romantic dinner, then spending the night in a five star hotel!
Me: We'll be back after this commercial break to see who's with who!
