Okay, I'm really suck at grammar in the past intros when I wrote "had" I meant "has". Now lets use the latter word in a sentence. This story "has" no plot and never will have (another tense of the same verb) a plot. The day it does have a plot is the day the men in white coats and holding needles stop chasing me.
Guest starring: Julia
Notes: Sort of bashing her, but no worse than anyone else. Sorry…I'm so mean…waaaahhh!
Death Annoying/Annoyance
"…What…is…happening…" Ari jerked awake as the blonde woman before them finally finished her sentence. Mr. Spike and Mr. Vicious could be heard fighting over the next hillock along with the detonating sheep.
"What? What did you say?" Two hours later the second sentence was finished and the girl managed to stay awake for the entirety of it. "Um…first Mr. Spike and Mr. Vicious are fighting over there and second some sheep are exploding.
Baaaaahhhhhhh?
Baaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!
BOOM
"…They're…explode…ing…?" Julia looked down to find the girl sleeping and the midday moon finally beginning to set. As soon as the opalescent orb had moved a quarter of an inch out of its most dangerous position all sheep baahed indifferently and settled down to sleep.
The confused blonde watched in shock as a horde of man-eating micies came stampeding towards them. The girl finally woke up to stare at these dread horrors and promptly decided that staying there was not something she wanted to do. Grabbing the new person's hand she dragged her towards the fighting men.
"Move your butts! We got some new friends coming and I don't think they're nice," she screamed as she raced past the combatants. The two men paused to stare at the rising tide of furry bodies in horror before declaring a very, very temporary truce and following the girl and woman.
"What the hell are those things?" Spike cried as one leapt for his vulnerable ankle. It sunk its small teeth into the tendon and hung on for dear life as its victim continued to run.
"I don't know. I've never seen them here before." The girl tossed the vegetable woman at Mr. Vicious, who gladly caught her and was then mauled by Mr. Spike who wanted to hold the woman too. "Something must be happening. Before it was only me and the sheep. Then came the forks, then the sporks and now these rabid micies."
"Where to? Stop it! I caught her fair and square." Poor Julia found her upper body being held by Spike and Vicious hanging onto her legs tenaciously as the two men tried to fight over her, fight each other and outdistance the man-eating micies all at the same time.
"To the forest! We might be able to lose them there!" Suddenly the moon came up and began to rise steadily towards its apex. "Crap! The sheep."
"Give her back!"
"Now way! Finder's, keeper's!" Vicious raced past carrying a comatose Julia over one shoulder very caveman-like. Spike ripped the micey on his ankle off and hurled it at his opponent. It sank its teeth into Vicious'…unmentionables and things got interesting.
* * * *
Will they escape the horde of man-eating micies? Will Julia finally speak a whole sentence in under thirty minutes? Will she finally decide who she likes? Or will the sheep explode? The answers: Yes. Now which question is it the answer to? If you guessed the last then you win:
Esheep!!!!!! Now you can have your own freaky sheep goodness. Yes this whole thing is in honor of esheep, those adorable, big-eyed creatures that gave me the inspiration to do this.
Baaaaah BOOOOOOM!!
