Chapter 2: The Tournament Begins

I emerge from the portal in a surprisingly familiar scenario. I am standing on a warp pipe and I see blocks and Goombas in the distance! Master Hand sure went all out this time.

As I advance, I jump on the Goombas until I see Koopas. Hmm…I bet those shells aren't any more friendly…but I'm stronger. I kick the Koopa, pick up his shell, and toss it at a group of Goombas. As expected, they fly away. I continue through the level, without much incident, until I get to a large platform with a mushroom on the ground. Suddenly, Yoshis start appearing. I grin. If this is anything like the Yoshi Team of the last tournament, I should have no problems.

"Mario! This is far enough!" a Yoshi shouts. I laugh and do my Tornado, clearing it and two others away. That and my Super Jump Punch is enough to beat this level-huh? Shouldn't this level be ending?

Sigh…I guess I have to keep going. I jump off the platform and, sure enough, more Goombas and Koopas confront me. They are still second nature to me and I defeat them or avoid them with no problem. I am impressed by the scenery; it feels just like the good old days. However, I run past a flag that Toad is holding, and a portal appears.

I end up on what appears to be Peach's castle…and then, Peach and another Mario come to challenge me. Normally I'd consider this odd, but I'm used to it.

"You'rea finished, Mario!" my counterpart taunts.

"Youa wish!" I reply.

"Take this, Mario!" Peach shouts, swinging a golf club at me. Ouch. Whatever…she asked for it.

I smash her, and this time, my powerful punch is accentuated by setting the target on fire. Interesting.

"How darea you!" Mario shouts. I sigh and swing my cape. Sure enough, the other Mario does his smash hit-facing the wrong way! This could get interesting. I grab Mario, punch him a few times, spin him around, and fling him away. All of a sudden, I see a large, black object send Mario flying to his doom. However, Peach just hit me in the back of the head with a vegetable. Oh, I get it. Like from that old game where we threw vegetables…I wonder if she can float, too.

Anyway, this black object is getting closer, and soon I recognize it! It's a Bullet Bill, except it's huge! And it's heading right for the castle! Hmm…I don't think I could defeat this Bill by jumping on it like I could in the past, so I'll just move out of the way. A switch appears on the ground that makes a green "?" box appear, and a warp star pops out of the block when I hit it. Peach eagerly floats (ha! I was right!) toward the block and picks up the warp star. At the same time, the Bill crashes into the side of the castle. Peach flies around for a few seconds and lands right in front of the Bill, which has just begun to spontaneously combust or something. I've never seen such a gratuitously large explosion!

Anyway, Peach flies away rather quickly, and the announcer shouts, "Game!" Hmm…wasn't it "Game set" last time? Oh well. A portal appears to take me to the next level.

As I step out of the portal, I hear an irritating rap playing in the background, and see two tiny DKs challenging me. Oh boy, what fun.

"Me crush Mario!"

"Me too!"

"No, me two! You one!"

"Huh?"

All right…I've had about enough of this level. A Mario Tornado sends them flying, and a few well-timed smash hits keep them away. They do manage to smack me a few times, but nothing serious. After all, DK's power lies in his size. One spinning down kick sends both away, and a portal takes me to…another DK level.

This time, giant DK is two platforms away from me. Hmm…it seems to me that the last time I had to fight giant DK, I had two partners. Oh well. He says nothing but jumps at me, and I follow, to the middle platform. Smash hits seem to be a bit stronger now against giants, so I may have a chance. I knock him over to the third platform, and I follow, preparing to smash him away. He gets the better of me, though, and kicks me backwards into the aby-What?

How did I get way down here at the first platform? My Super Jump Punch sends me back up, but…oh, I see. It's above a river. How obnoxious.

Anyway, he's winding up to punch me, so I jump right in front of him and swing my cape. He spins around, punches the air, and flies away afire thanks to my new smash hit. He gets back, of course, but this is a lot easier than last time. I jump and swing my fist in midair, and it sends him flying impressively far. As he comes back, I grab him. I punch him, throw him straight up into the air, Super Jump Punch, and as I land, I headbutt him into the air. I jump, kick, and he lands on the first platform.

"Ow." DK comments.

I ignore DK's verbal skills and jump onto the platform with him. He tries to headbutt me into the ground, but my smash hit is faster. He falls into the water and is carried downstream.

"Game!"

Hmm…this doesn't seem too hard. I enter the portal, eager for my next challenge.