Boy Scouts?
by Megami
Disclaimer: You know how it goes, blah, blah, blah, I own squat, blah, blah.
A/N: I'm skipping straight to the next week, incase you can't tell. Right now, I'm on a bus going to Waubonssi Community College (or however you sp it) for a stupid field trip. I normally LOVE field trips (out of school! ^_^), but this one's gonna be boring as all hell. Oh, yeah, and stupid me forgot to bring her homework . . Ah, well, this is more fun than Health anyway!
~*~*~ Chapter Four ~*~*~
All the G-guys were currently packing for the camping trip (they'll be leaving later that day). Heero was filling his bag with as much guns, ammo and explosives that would fit, his beloved laptop was also packed safely where it could not be broken or stolen by a certain braided baka who loved to play solitaire. (a/n: Who doesn't?) His clothes and other crap took second priority, and were shoved to the side in the bag. Wufei shoved three catnaps in his bag and started to fill the rest of the space with various martial arts stuff and, of coarse, his portable Nataku shrine. Blah, blah, blah...I won't go into what everyone packed.
"HEY EVERYONE! WE'RE GONNA BE LEAVING SOON!" called Quatre.
Soon...too soon... they were in the car, heading toward the meeting point and the bus.
~~ Camping Time!! ~~
The bus ride was fairly uneventful...surprisingly enough. There were only two justice rants before Quatre went zero and managed to get Wufei to shut up. So it wasn't *that* uneventful, but I don't feel like writing about the bus ride (.). Anyway, once they reached camp, they were told to pick partners for tents. They would all be in pairs, except for one group of three. Quatre and Trowa were the first to sign in as partners, and because I'm evil, the group of three consisted of Heero, Duo, and Wufei.
"INJUSTICE!!!"
"Hn."
"This could be great!!! Think of the possibilities..." Duo received a Heero Yuy Death Glare and Wufei's nose began bleeding uncontrollably.
They were soon able to set their tent up without it crashing down, once Duo stopped `helping'.
"Great work, boys! Now we'll go meet up with the girl scouts for dinner and campfire fun! ^_^"
The g-guys reluctantly went tot he girls' cabin, knowing full well who they'd see. The first one out was Dorothy, with her brows fluttering in the wind. (a/n: ::shudder::)
"Oi!" she called to the other girls. "They're here!" Dorothy ran over to Quatre and glomped onto him, only to be ripped off by a very angry Trowa.
"If you touch him, I'll pluck off those damn eyebrows...*very* slowly."
Dorothy glared at him, then turned her back and went to see where everyone else was.
"HHHHHEEEEEEEEERRRRRRROOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!" Relena ran to him, arms outstretched, but rammed her forehead into his gun's tip.
"HEERO!! NO GUNS ALLOWED AT CAMP!!!" yelled the Boy scout leader. Heero then turned his glare and gun on the leader. Relena seized the opportunity to glomp onto Heero, which thourally pissed off Duo. He whipped his gun out and shot Relena in the head (the she-demon doesn't get killed by Duo often, so I decided to let him have the fun this time! ^_^ I'm so kind)
"Domo Arigatou."
Sally then came out and kicked Relena's corpse off to the side.
"God, she smells even worse after she's dead." (a/n: I like Sally, so sue me! No, wait a minute...don't. Please don't!)
Catherine shrieked when she saw Relena's body, which caused the rest of the Girl scouts to come and see what was up.
"Who killed her?" asked Noin.
"Duo"
"Huh, I would have thought that Heero would've killed her."
"He was busy at the moment...hey...where's Zechs? I'm surprised he's not here and you are."
"He quit the minute he found out I signed him up. Why didn't you guys?"
They all looked at Quatre who looked around innocently and began whistling.
This whole while, Heero was still pointing his gun and glaring at the Boy scout leader, who decided to tell the random other scouts to start dinner. Heero let him go since he was getting pretty hungry. Then Hilde went up to Duo.
"Hey, Duo-chan! Wanna come over tonight?" she wiggled her eyebrows up and down.
"NO!!"
"Why not?" she whined and gave him puppy-dog eyes. Duo looked at his friends for help; Heero shrugged and Wufei sighed. `I have no clue why I'm doing this...' he thought.
"He can't come over because he's going to be...busy...at our tent tonight."
"NANI?!"
"Yes, it's going to be...wild." Wufei said, then walked closer to Duo and whispered: "You owe me big time, Maxwell."
"Danke." Duo whispered back.
(a/n: Duo: Why am I speaking german?
Megami: [to readers] `danke' means `thank you' in German. [to Duo]
I'm taking German at Hell, aka School, that's why.
Duo: Whatever.)
Everyone outside were giving them weird looks, so Duo decided to be brave and piss Wufei off at the same time. He threw his arms around Wufei's neck and gave him a HUGE kiss right on the lips.
"Oh Wu-Wu! I'm *soooo* happy you *finally* admitted it!"
The look on Wufei's face was priceless, but Duo could only enjoy it for a little while, before he ran as fast as he could into the forest (if he stayed, Duo knew he would probably die) laughing his ass off. A minute or so later, a very pissed off Wufei ran after him, with everyone outside laughing their asses off too. (Yes! Even Heero and Trowa!) Well, everyone except Catherine, Dorothy, and Hilde who were still confused about what just happened.
~~ Interjection ~~
Wufei: KISAMA!! ONNA!! YOU SHALL PAY!! I'LL KILL YOU!!
[Megami begins running away from an angry Wufei with her laptop while Duo is vigorously brushing his teeth in the bathroom and looking for the extra strength Listerine (do they even make that?)]
Megami: Back to the [ducks under the katana being swung at her head] story!!
~~ Back to the fic ~~
Duo and Wufei came back in about a half and hour, and Duo looked like he had been punched in the gut a couple of times.
"Where've you two been?" asked the scout leader.
"We had some things to discuss."
"Oh, well, I'm glad you boys finally realized that fighting isn't the answer. We are now ready to start dinner, so everyone gather at the campfire!"
They did, and Wufei made sure not to sit next to Duo. Trowa, Quatre, Duo, and Heero were the only ones who caught this and found it amusing. Everyone got a pointed stick and a cold, nasty-looking hot dog. Duo wasn't really in the mood to perturb anyone, so he behaved himself at dinner, and counted his debt to Wufei re-paid. While they were eating, some random girl asked where Relena was. The g-guys and girls looked around and Duo quickly said "Couldn't tell ya!" No one was suspicious until Catherine broke into tears and started repeating "she's dead!" over and over and over again.
"Nani?! Dead?!"
There was a moment of silence, even though she didn't deserve it and the Girl Scout leader decided to call Zechs.
"Merquise-san, I'm afraid I have some bad news to tell you..."
"Shit. Did Megami decide to stalk me again?" (a/n: You're so cruel!)
"No...your sister, Relena, was tragically killed."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes."
"Hang on a second." In the background, they could hear (it's on a speaker phone) Zechs walking around and then they heard "HALLELJUA! HALLELJUA!!"
The G-guys and Sally started laughing while everyone else was shocked. Zechs went back to the phone and said: "When you get back from camp, there will be a HUGE party at my house to celebrate this wonderful, happy, and joyous occasion!"
They hung up and the camp leader said: "We will forgo the campfire singing in honor of Relena."
"How is that honoring her?"
"Why would we *want* to honor that onna?"
"THAT'S IT! I'M GETTING SICK AND TIRED OF YOUR SMART-ALEK (sp?) COMMENTS!!! THE THREE OF YOU (H, W, and D) BACK TO YOUR TENT! AND YOU (T & Q) GO WITH THEM TO MAKE SURE THEY DON'T LEAVE!!!"
Quatre and Trowa really had no problem going back to the tent and were enthusiastic. Wufei really wanted to go back too, but didn't want to seem too excited because of what he said earlier. `Damn it! Why did I have to help Maxwell?!' he thought.
~~ At the tents ~~
Quatre and Trowa's tent had a little `Do not disturb' sign on it and in the other occupied tent, there was chaos. Duo wanted to sleep in the middle, so Wufei called him a weakling who was scared of a forest and the dark. Duo tried to punch Wufei, but when he pulled his arm back, he hit Heero in the nose. Heero said "Omea o korosu!!!" and tried to kill poor Duo-chan, but when he leaped at him, he ran into Wufei too, since the tent was so small. Then Wufei tried to kill them both. Sometime during the fight, the tent collapsed. When the rest of the boy scouts came back, Quatre and Trowa removed the sign and pretended to be sleeping peacefully. When they looked at the other tent, they saw it was collapsed and LOTS of movement inside. Six little boy scouts ran away with bloody noses and the furious scout leader walked over and ripped the tent open (there were already multiple bullet holes and rips from a katana in it). They saw all three guys almost lying on each other and it
didn't click that they were fighting and trying to kill each other. When the tree noticed the scouts were looking at them, they tucked away all the weapons, as a precaution, and froze, blushing a deep red. Wufei's nose then began to bleed for the second time that day and Quatre and Trowa came out to see what was going on (though they all ready knew, they were still pretending to be innocent).
"IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK!" yelled Duo.
"Is this what you ment when you said Duo would be `busy'?" asked some random boy. Wufei began ranting and Duo went back to yelling and arguing at this. Heero said nothing, but looked over the situation logically. They didn't have much of an argument, considering all their clothes were ripped and messy, Wufei's and Duo's hair was all over the place (so was Heero's but his always is, so that proved nothing). Then their tent was in ruins and it must've not looked good from their view. `Kuso' thought Heero when he remembered Wufei's `help' earlier. Arguing with them was pointless, so he went up to the scout leader and said "I think we need a new tent."
"Ohhhhhh no you won't!! You three are going home NOW!!! And *never* try and join boy scouts again!!"
Heero shrugged and whistled. `Ah, well. At least we get to leave earlier now.' he thought.
Wing Zero soon came to the whistle, accompanied by the rest of the gundams and about 200 horses. [1] The Boy scouts were shocked to realize they were Gundam Pilots, and huddled together. Heero quickly got into Zero and stepped on all the boys.
"Aaahhh! Why did you do that?" asked Quatre.
"Isn't it obvious?! He was administering Justice!" said Justice-boy.
(a/n: Wufei: My name isn't `Justice-boy', onna.
Megami: Yes it is.
Wufei: No it isn-- ::sigh:: it's pointless arguing with you isn't it?
Megami: ::laughing:: Yep! ^_^
Wufei: ...injustice...)
They all got in their gundams and headed for the girls' cabin. All the g-girls were outside. Heero gracefully allowed the other four pilots to have the fun this time. Wufei went over and picked up Sally, before stepping on the other girls who were outside. Unfortunately, Dorothy was able to step out of the way and survived. She was about to start laughing maniacally, but she was picked up by HeavyArms. Sandrock and Deathscythe Hell demolished the cabin, and kept shooting at it until only ashes were left.
~~ Epilogue...kind of ~~
Sally moved into the safe house and quit girl scouts. (I know, I know, I can't help the fact that I like Sally! No flames please! I, oddly enough, like both wufei/sally fics *and* 5x6x13 *and* 5x13 fics!!! Truly, I am a Yaoi fan!) The g-guys never joined Boy Scouts again, and they all lived happily ever after until Duo found some expresso later that day.
~~ Owari ~~
a/n: Can you tell how incredibly bored I was? I'm now home from the field trip from Hell and it sucked (duh). Um...I can't think of anything to say... so, uh, Ja ne! ^_^
[1] Me and a couple of my friends were ranting/talking about how when people whistle for their horses the whistle is always the same, so why don't a million horses come when someone whistles? I know the *real* reason, but we were hyped up on sugar or something and it was funny at the time, so I stuck it in here. Can't remember what we were watching though...
by Megami
Disclaimer: You know how it goes, blah, blah, blah, I own squat, blah, blah.
A/N: I'm skipping straight to the next week, incase you can't tell. Right now, I'm on a bus going to Waubonssi Community College (or however you sp it) for a stupid field trip. I normally LOVE field trips (out of school! ^_^), but this one's gonna be boring as all hell. Oh, yeah, and stupid me forgot to bring her homework . . Ah, well, this is more fun than Health anyway!
~*~*~ Chapter Four ~*~*~
All the G-guys were currently packing for the camping trip (they'll be leaving later that day). Heero was filling his bag with as much guns, ammo and explosives that would fit, his beloved laptop was also packed safely where it could not be broken or stolen by a certain braided baka who loved to play solitaire. (a/n: Who doesn't?) His clothes and other crap took second priority, and were shoved to the side in the bag. Wufei shoved three catnaps in his bag and started to fill the rest of the space with various martial arts stuff and, of coarse, his portable Nataku shrine. Blah, blah, blah...I won't go into what everyone packed.
"HEY EVERYONE! WE'RE GONNA BE LEAVING SOON!" called Quatre.
Soon...too soon... they were in the car, heading toward the meeting point and the bus.
~~ Camping Time!! ~~
The bus ride was fairly uneventful...surprisingly enough. There were only two justice rants before Quatre went zero and managed to get Wufei to shut up. So it wasn't *that* uneventful, but I don't feel like writing about the bus ride (.). Anyway, once they reached camp, they were told to pick partners for tents. They would all be in pairs, except for one group of three. Quatre and Trowa were the first to sign in as partners, and because I'm evil, the group of three consisted of Heero, Duo, and Wufei.
"INJUSTICE!!!"
"Hn."
"This could be great!!! Think of the possibilities..." Duo received a Heero Yuy Death Glare and Wufei's nose began bleeding uncontrollably.
They were soon able to set their tent up without it crashing down, once Duo stopped `helping'.
"Great work, boys! Now we'll go meet up with the girl scouts for dinner and campfire fun! ^_^"
The g-guys reluctantly went tot he girls' cabin, knowing full well who they'd see. The first one out was Dorothy, with her brows fluttering in the wind. (a/n: ::shudder::)
"Oi!" she called to the other girls. "They're here!" Dorothy ran over to Quatre and glomped onto him, only to be ripped off by a very angry Trowa.
"If you touch him, I'll pluck off those damn eyebrows...*very* slowly."
Dorothy glared at him, then turned her back and went to see where everyone else was.
"HHHHHEEEEEEEEERRRRRRROOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!" Relena ran to him, arms outstretched, but rammed her forehead into his gun's tip.
"HEERO!! NO GUNS ALLOWED AT CAMP!!!" yelled the Boy scout leader. Heero then turned his glare and gun on the leader. Relena seized the opportunity to glomp onto Heero, which thourally pissed off Duo. He whipped his gun out and shot Relena in the head (the she-demon doesn't get killed by Duo often, so I decided to let him have the fun this time! ^_^ I'm so kind)
"Domo Arigatou."
Sally then came out and kicked Relena's corpse off to the side.
"God, she smells even worse after she's dead." (a/n: I like Sally, so sue me! No, wait a minute...don't. Please don't!)
Catherine shrieked when she saw Relena's body, which caused the rest of the Girl scouts to come and see what was up.
"Who killed her?" asked Noin.
"Duo"
"Huh, I would have thought that Heero would've killed her."
"He was busy at the moment...hey...where's Zechs? I'm surprised he's not here and you are."
"He quit the minute he found out I signed him up. Why didn't you guys?"
They all looked at Quatre who looked around innocently and began whistling.
This whole while, Heero was still pointing his gun and glaring at the Boy scout leader, who decided to tell the random other scouts to start dinner. Heero let him go since he was getting pretty hungry. Then Hilde went up to Duo.
"Hey, Duo-chan! Wanna come over tonight?" she wiggled her eyebrows up and down.
"NO!!"
"Why not?" she whined and gave him puppy-dog eyes. Duo looked at his friends for help; Heero shrugged and Wufei sighed. `I have no clue why I'm doing this...' he thought.
"He can't come over because he's going to be...busy...at our tent tonight."
"NANI?!"
"Yes, it's going to be...wild." Wufei said, then walked closer to Duo and whispered: "You owe me big time, Maxwell."
"Danke." Duo whispered back.
(a/n: Duo: Why am I speaking german?
Megami: [to readers] `danke' means `thank you' in German. [to Duo]
I'm taking German at Hell, aka School, that's why.
Duo: Whatever.)
Everyone outside were giving them weird looks, so Duo decided to be brave and piss Wufei off at the same time. He threw his arms around Wufei's neck and gave him a HUGE kiss right on the lips.
"Oh Wu-Wu! I'm *soooo* happy you *finally* admitted it!"
The look on Wufei's face was priceless, but Duo could only enjoy it for a little while, before he ran as fast as he could into the forest (if he stayed, Duo knew he would probably die) laughing his ass off. A minute or so later, a very pissed off Wufei ran after him, with everyone outside laughing their asses off too. (Yes! Even Heero and Trowa!) Well, everyone except Catherine, Dorothy, and Hilde who were still confused about what just happened.
~~ Interjection ~~
Wufei: KISAMA!! ONNA!! YOU SHALL PAY!! I'LL KILL YOU!!
[Megami begins running away from an angry Wufei with her laptop while Duo is vigorously brushing his teeth in the bathroom and looking for the extra strength Listerine (do they even make that?)]
Megami: Back to the [ducks under the katana being swung at her head] story!!
~~ Back to the fic ~~
Duo and Wufei came back in about a half and hour, and Duo looked like he had been punched in the gut a couple of times.
"Where've you two been?" asked the scout leader.
"We had some things to discuss."
"Oh, well, I'm glad you boys finally realized that fighting isn't the answer. We are now ready to start dinner, so everyone gather at the campfire!"
They did, and Wufei made sure not to sit next to Duo. Trowa, Quatre, Duo, and Heero were the only ones who caught this and found it amusing. Everyone got a pointed stick and a cold, nasty-looking hot dog. Duo wasn't really in the mood to perturb anyone, so he behaved himself at dinner, and counted his debt to Wufei re-paid. While they were eating, some random girl asked where Relena was. The g-guys and girls looked around and Duo quickly said "Couldn't tell ya!" No one was suspicious until Catherine broke into tears and started repeating "she's dead!" over and over and over again.
"Nani?! Dead?!"
There was a moment of silence, even though she didn't deserve it and the Girl Scout leader decided to call Zechs.
"Merquise-san, I'm afraid I have some bad news to tell you..."
"Shit. Did Megami decide to stalk me again?" (a/n: You're so cruel!)
"No...your sister, Relena, was tragically killed."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes."
"Hang on a second." In the background, they could hear (it's on a speaker phone) Zechs walking around and then they heard "HALLELJUA! HALLELJUA!!"
The G-guys and Sally started laughing while everyone else was shocked. Zechs went back to the phone and said: "When you get back from camp, there will be a HUGE party at my house to celebrate this wonderful, happy, and joyous occasion!"
They hung up and the camp leader said: "We will forgo the campfire singing in honor of Relena."
"How is that honoring her?"
"Why would we *want* to honor that onna?"
"THAT'S IT! I'M GETTING SICK AND TIRED OF YOUR SMART-ALEK (sp?) COMMENTS!!! THE THREE OF YOU (H, W, and D) BACK TO YOUR TENT! AND YOU (T & Q) GO WITH THEM TO MAKE SURE THEY DON'T LEAVE!!!"
Quatre and Trowa really had no problem going back to the tent and were enthusiastic. Wufei really wanted to go back too, but didn't want to seem too excited because of what he said earlier. `Damn it! Why did I have to help Maxwell?!' he thought.
~~ At the tents ~~
Quatre and Trowa's tent had a little `Do not disturb' sign on it and in the other occupied tent, there was chaos. Duo wanted to sleep in the middle, so Wufei called him a weakling who was scared of a forest and the dark. Duo tried to punch Wufei, but when he pulled his arm back, he hit Heero in the nose. Heero said "Omea o korosu!!!" and tried to kill poor Duo-chan, but when he leaped at him, he ran into Wufei too, since the tent was so small. Then Wufei tried to kill them both. Sometime during the fight, the tent collapsed. When the rest of the boy scouts came back, Quatre and Trowa removed the sign and pretended to be sleeping peacefully. When they looked at the other tent, they saw it was collapsed and LOTS of movement inside. Six little boy scouts ran away with bloody noses and the furious scout leader walked over and ripped the tent open (there were already multiple bullet holes and rips from a katana in it). They saw all three guys almost lying on each other and it
didn't click that they were fighting and trying to kill each other. When the tree noticed the scouts were looking at them, they tucked away all the weapons, as a precaution, and froze, blushing a deep red. Wufei's nose then began to bleed for the second time that day and Quatre and Trowa came out to see what was going on (though they all ready knew, they were still pretending to be innocent).
"IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK!" yelled Duo.
"Is this what you ment when you said Duo would be `busy'?" asked some random boy. Wufei began ranting and Duo went back to yelling and arguing at this. Heero said nothing, but looked over the situation logically. They didn't have much of an argument, considering all their clothes were ripped and messy, Wufei's and Duo's hair was all over the place (so was Heero's but his always is, so that proved nothing). Then their tent was in ruins and it must've not looked good from their view. `Kuso' thought Heero when he remembered Wufei's `help' earlier. Arguing with them was pointless, so he went up to the scout leader and said "I think we need a new tent."
"Ohhhhhh no you won't!! You three are going home NOW!!! And *never* try and join boy scouts again!!"
Heero shrugged and whistled. `Ah, well. At least we get to leave earlier now.' he thought.
Wing Zero soon came to the whistle, accompanied by the rest of the gundams and about 200 horses. [1] The Boy scouts were shocked to realize they were Gundam Pilots, and huddled together. Heero quickly got into Zero and stepped on all the boys.
"Aaahhh! Why did you do that?" asked Quatre.
"Isn't it obvious?! He was administering Justice!" said Justice-boy.
(a/n: Wufei: My name isn't `Justice-boy', onna.
Megami: Yes it is.
Wufei: No it isn-- ::sigh:: it's pointless arguing with you isn't it?
Megami: ::laughing:: Yep! ^_^
Wufei: ...injustice...)
They all got in their gundams and headed for the girls' cabin. All the g-girls were outside. Heero gracefully allowed the other four pilots to have the fun this time. Wufei went over and picked up Sally, before stepping on the other girls who were outside. Unfortunately, Dorothy was able to step out of the way and survived. She was about to start laughing maniacally, but she was picked up by HeavyArms. Sandrock and Deathscythe Hell demolished the cabin, and kept shooting at it until only ashes were left.
~~ Epilogue...kind of ~~
Sally moved into the safe house and quit girl scouts. (I know, I know, I can't help the fact that I like Sally! No flames please! I, oddly enough, like both wufei/sally fics *and* 5x6x13 *and* 5x13 fics!!! Truly, I am a Yaoi fan!) The g-guys never joined Boy Scouts again, and they all lived happily ever after until Duo found some expresso later that day.
~~ Owari ~~
a/n: Can you tell how incredibly bored I was? I'm now home from the field trip from Hell and it sucked (duh). Um...I can't think of anything to say... so, uh, Ja ne! ^_^
[1] Me and a couple of my friends were ranting/talking about how when people whistle for their horses the whistle is always the same, so why don't a million horses come when someone whistles? I know the *real* reason, but we were hyped up on sugar or something and it was funny at the time, so I stuck it in here. Can't remember what we were watching though...