Title: Little Boy Lost
Author: Nataku
Rating: R
Genre: Angst, horror, gore
Pairing: None
Warning: Okay ladies and gents, this story has a lot of gore. Nothing really yet on the vocab level, but man does it have gore. Those with queasy stomachs should think twice before reading.
Disclaimer: Once again, this character is my own. It's Marourin.
Summary: Why is the Black Jackal as cruel as he is? No one starts out evil right? Listen to him as he tells the tale of his past.
Author's Note: *looks over writing* Damn, I can't believe I wrote this! I made myself nauseous writing it. Such a spoiler for his past. Anyway, please enjoy and please don't judge him too harshly. Remember, he's a little boy now.
What is that light I now see?
Take it now away from me
Hold it to my heart aflame
Take it from my frozen blame
Little Boy Lost
Chapter 3: Spark of Light
~~~~~~~~~~~
Kaa-san....
Help me find my way...
Watch over me. Guide me please...
I can't take much more of this...
Please, help me find my way...
Kaa-san....
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kaa-san, I'm starting to loose myself in this black abyss. I try to keep my mind. I try to keep my sanity... but every day it slips a little farther away from me. It's becoming so hard to remember I am human and who I am. The name is still with me, but that voice in my head is getting stronger. I think he has merged as far in my soul as he can go now.
He frightens me kaa-san.
I can feel him.
O can feel how dark he is. I don't know if he has a soul, but he certainly doesn't have mine. His emotions of anger, and his icy darkness just are so different from myself. He has such a boiling hatred flowing like ice water through his veins...his phantom veins that pulse with life that he should not posses. Sometimes he whispers things in my mind that scares me.
He whispers thoughts of blood and flesh, shadows, and revenge.
How tempting he is, like the devil himself. He soothes me, crooning to me about killing...about death.
Oh how well he knows death, as if he were it's secret lover who knew it's every secret.
With a morbid interest I listen. I listen as he teaches about the wondrous event; about the rigor mortis... about the slow decay the body starts as soon as the last breath of life has fled. I listen as he talks fondly about the filmy glaze that seeps over the eyes. I listen as he talks tenderly about the blood that pools at the bottom of their body and how he wishes he could extenuate the corpses so they stay free of the horrid bruises. I cannot help but to, like a mouse freezes at the sight of a cat. Please don't blame me for listening to him, this evil seducer. I try to close my ears to him, but how do you avoid something in your own mind?
The solitude is only increasing his power over me. He promises that he can get us out, that he can save my mind, but only if I loose it to him first. Every day it becomes harder to ignore him.
Where did he get his powers of persuasion?
These black forests are taunting, cruel in their looming majesty.
And the stars over head, what are they? They are a myriad number of uncaring deities. They wink down in mocking sympathy while high in their lofty thrones. What do they care about me? What do they care about anything?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kaa-san? Where are you?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It's getting harder to not loose hope and I can feel myself dying. Slowly, agonizingly, shard by bleeding shard, I perish.
I can't keep going much longer. I keep pushing myself, hoping to one-day find the light at the end of this fathomless darkness.
How hard it has become.
The day I drop down at last, I will die. In these black foresting, uncaring, unknown, I shall depart from this world. You will be there to take me home won't you? You'll be there to wrap me in your warm embrace.
I walk.
I wonder.
I search.
I feel this odd tingling sensation nowadays. Like I'm getting close to something. I hope, I pray its people.
After days of traveling in this dark abyss, I imagine the scent something different.
Or is it really just my imagination?
Maybe I've finally found people.
Has my walking picked up? Has my head lifted higher? Perhaps though I am not sure.
~~~~~~~~
Salvation? Could it be?
~~~~~~~~
Kaa-san! I see a break in this black forest! I see the trees getting sparser. Could it be??!
YES!!! IT IS!!! I SEE MEN!
My heart leaps with joy, pounding like a thrush inside my chest, yearning to be freed. I start running toward the sight, the smell. Overjoyed. I feel warmth inside my heart, my soul. Oh kaa-san, it feels so good! It feels so right! Laughing, I run and run. I see the men, how startled they look! And yet... they look scared too.
'Don't be frightened' I want to say, but my voice has rusted away from lack of use.
'Help me!' I wanted to shout, bout all I could do was laugh, smiling with glee. But I was feeling heavier...more tired...
Please don't let me fall asleep. I want to be with those men. I want to be with humans once more...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Boy! What are you doing?! This body is mine!
Stop it, please, onegai! Let me release this from my heart. I beg of you. It was mine from the start and all I ask is a chance to talk to kaa-san...
You're kaa-san is dead! Her bones have long since turned to dust in a pile of rubble! Stop being foolish. This body is mine, I claimed it, I shaped it, and it belongs to me!
Kuda sai, don't force me back into the darkness!
Urusai! Sleep once more, child. You vex me.
Onegai!
Mine!!!
KAA-SAN!!!!!
She'll never come back to help you boy. The only person you have left is myself. You knew that when you decided to dance with the devil. You knew that when you gave your soul to me.
Kaa-san....
I am the only one who can truly love you, and you know that as well as I.
Kaa-san... Doushite...?
Sleep, child. Sh, I love you. Only me. I'll be your mother, your father, your brother, and your lover. Come; come into my embrace once more and sleep. Sleep and dream you're delusional dreams, child.
Is it true?
Hm?
Do you really love me?
Of course, now and forever mon beau ange.
I don't believe you...kaa-san... Sayonara. Wait for me kaa-san; I'll come, one day...
Sleep.
For now, I will. And maybe in my dreams, I can believe you. Maybe I will love you too.
Shh....
Goodbye....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hm, that boy is asleep at last. Do I love him? I can only sneer at that question. That is my secret, and mine alone.
I'd like to see his dear 'kaa-san' try to take him away.
He belongs to me.
Mine.
Forever...
The End.
Author's Note: Okay, I know this part is a little odd. But basically, this will be the ending to Little Boy Lost.
As for the entire last section of this chapter, this jerks you out of the timeline, and into the present mind, where the evil half is wrenching back control. Nothing dirty was intended, it was that whole "You have to love yourself before anything else" type thing. Hope I didn't confuse you ^_^.
As usual, flames shall be used to roast...pineapples!
Author: Nataku
Rating: R
Genre: Angst, horror, gore
Pairing: None
Warning: Okay ladies and gents, this story has a lot of gore. Nothing really yet on the vocab level, but man does it have gore. Those with queasy stomachs should think twice before reading.
Disclaimer: Once again, this character is my own. It's Marourin.
Summary: Why is the Black Jackal as cruel as he is? No one starts out evil right? Listen to him as he tells the tale of his past.
Author's Note: *looks over writing* Damn, I can't believe I wrote this! I made myself nauseous writing it. Such a spoiler for his past. Anyway, please enjoy and please don't judge him too harshly. Remember, he's a little boy now.
What is that light I now see?
Take it now away from me
Hold it to my heart aflame
Take it from my frozen blame
Little Boy Lost
Chapter 3: Spark of Light
~~~~~~~~~~~
Kaa-san....
Help me find my way...
Watch over me. Guide me please...
I can't take much more of this...
Please, help me find my way...
Kaa-san....
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kaa-san, I'm starting to loose myself in this black abyss. I try to keep my mind. I try to keep my sanity... but every day it slips a little farther away from me. It's becoming so hard to remember I am human and who I am. The name is still with me, but that voice in my head is getting stronger. I think he has merged as far in my soul as he can go now.
He frightens me kaa-san.
I can feel him.
O can feel how dark he is. I don't know if he has a soul, but he certainly doesn't have mine. His emotions of anger, and his icy darkness just are so different from myself. He has such a boiling hatred flowing like ice water through his veins...his phantom veins that pulse with life that he should not posses. Sometimes he whispers things in my mind that scares me.
He whispers thoughts of blood and flesh, shadows, and revenge.
How tempting he is, like the devil himself. He soothes me, crooning to me about killing...about death.
Oh how well he knows death, as if he were it's secret lover who knew it's every secret.
With a morbid interest I listen. I listen as he teaches about the wondrous event; about the rigor mortis... about the slow decay the body starts as soon as the last breath of life has fled. I listen as he talks fondly about the filmy glaze that seeps over the eyes. I listen as he talks tenderly about the blood that pools at the bottom of their body and how he wishes he could extenuate the corpses so they stay free of the horrid bruises. I cannot help but to, like a mouse freezes at the sight of a cat. Please don't blame me for listening to him, this evil seducer. I try to close my ears to him, but how do you avoid something in your own mind?
The solitude is only increasing his power over me. He promises that he can get us out, that he can save my mind, but only if I loose it to him first. Every day it becomes harder to ignore him.
Where did he get his powers of persuasion?
These black forests are taunting, cruel in their looming majesty.
And the stars over head, what are they? They are a myriad number of uncaring deities. They wink down in mocking sympathy while high in their lofty thrones. What do they care about me? What do they care about anything?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kaa-san? Where are you?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It's getting harder to not loose hope and I can feel myself dying. Slowly, agonizingly, shard by bleeding shard, I perish.
I can't keep going much longer. I keep pushing myself, hoping to one-day find the light at the end of this fathomless darkness.
How hard it has become.
The day I drop down at last, I will die. In these black foresting, uncaring, unknown, I shall depart from this world. You will be there to take me home won't you? You'll be there to wrap me in your warm embrace.
I walk.
I wonder.
I search.
I feel this odd tingling sensation nowadays. Like I'm getting close to something. I hope, I pray its people.
After days of traveling in this dark abyss, I imagine the scent something different.
Or is it really just my imagination?
Maybe I've finally found people.
Has my walking picked up? Has my head lifted higher? Perhaps though I am not sure.
~~~~~~~~
Salvation? Could it be?
~~~~~~~~
Kaa-san! I see a break in this black forest! I see the trees getting sparser. Could it be??!
YES!!! IT IS!!! I SEE MEN!
My heart leaps with joy, pounding like a thrush inside my chest, yearning to be freed. I start running toward the sight, the smell. Overjoyed. I feel warmth inside my heart, my soul. Oh kaa-san, it feels so good! It feels so right! Laughing, I run and run. I see the men, how startled they look! And yet... they look scared too.
'Don't be frightened' I want to say, but my voice has rusted away from lack of use.
'Help me!' I wanted to shout, bout all I could do was laugh, smiling with glee. But I was feeling heavier...more tired...
Please don't let me fall asleep. I want to be with those men. I want to be with humans once more...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Boy! What are you doing?! This body is mine!
Stop it, please, onegai! Let me release this from my heart. I beg of you. It was mine from the start and all I ask is a chance to talk to kaa-san...
You're kaa-san is dead! Her bones have long since turned to dust in a pile of rubble! Stop being foolish. This body is mine, I claimed it, I shaped it, and it belongs to me!
Kuda sai, don't force me back into the darkness!
Urusai! Sleep once more, child. You vex me.
Onegai!
Mine!!!
KAA-SAN!!!!!
She'll never come back to help you boy. The only person you have left is myself. You knew that when you decided to dance with the devil. You knew that when you gave your soul to me.
Kaa-san....
I am the only one who can truly love you, and you know that as well as I.
Kaa-san... Doushite...?
Sleep, child. Sh, I love you. Only me. I'll be your mother, your father, your brother, and your lover. Come; come into my embrace once more and sleep. Sleep and dream you're delusional dreams, child.
Is it true?
Hm?
Do you really love me?
Of course, now and forever mon beau ange.
I don't believe you...kaa-san... Sayonara. Wait for me kaa-san; I'll come, one day...
Sleep.
For now, I will. And maybe in my dreams, I can believe you. Maybe I will love you too.
Shh....
Goodbye....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hm, that boy is asleep at last. Do I love him? I can only sneer at that question. That is my secret, and mine alone.
I'd like to see his dear 'kaa-san' try to take him away.
He belongs to me.
Mine.
Forever...
The End.
Author's Note: Okay, I know this part is a little odd. But basically, this will be the ending to Little Boy Lost.
As for the entire last section of this chapter, this jerks you out of the timeline, and into the present mind, where the evil half is wrenching back control. Nothing dirty was intended, it was that whole "You have to love yourself before anything else" type thing. Hope I didn't confuse you ^_^.
As usual, flames shall be used to roast...pineapples!