"Hey, come on in," Lorelai said to Luke, taking the pot of coffee from his hand. "Only one?"
"Don't complain. Now where do you want this stuff?" he asked, holding up a brown paper grocery bag.
"What's in there?"
"Lukey food," he replied with a smirk.
"That can go in the kitchen." She led him past the living room where Tristan and Rory were watching a tape of last week's Dawson Creek, and into the kitchen.
" . . . and out the back door," she continued her conversation. "And come to rest in the trash can."
"Nice try, but no dice. You spat, remember?"
"It was a moment of weakness on behalf on my salivary glands. What can I say, they work overtime when I'm near you," she said, hoping to get out of the deal.
"Not funny," Luke said, although he was secretly pleased. "Here, try this." He tapped the lid of a small container.
"What's that?" she asked, taking off the lid and sniffing at the contents.
"Hummus."
"What's hummus?"
"It's like peanut butter." He took out a rice cracker and dipped it into the yellow mixture. "Here," he said forcing it into her mouth.
Lorelai's face contorts as some of the paste finds it way down her oesophagus. She spits what she can out.
"How is that like peanut butter? It tastes like cardboard and feels like paste."
"Did it stick to the roof of your mouth?"
"Yes."
"Then it's exactly like peanut butter."
"What's in it?"
"Chick pea."
"Chick pee, you can say that again."
Meanwhile in the living room
"That's whacked! Who talks like that?" said Tristan. "No teenager this side of sanity could possibly have the vocabulary that these people have. What do they put in the water in Capeside?"
"You do know that this is a show right? Purely entertainment," Rory explained.
"Well it's not entertaining me. Who do these producers think they are? They take great actors like these, half of them were probably really happy doing their thing in other shows, and turn them into mini-Nietzsches that clearly do not represent the generation that is us."
"Gee, passionate much? Maybe you should be on that show."
Tristan scoffed.
"When is everyone getting here?" Tristan checked his watch. "Not that I'm nervous or anything."
"Why would you be?"
*Why? Why? Is she stupid? One bad opinion of me from the mouth of Lane Kim, best friend to Rory Gilmore, could be the death of the beautiful thing that is us. True, there really isn't an us, but there could be, and if there were, Lane would be in the position to destroy us. Oh my goodness, I'm rambling in my head. Oh my goodness, I said goodness. I need to get away from Stars Hollow. These people are like a spooky version of Leave it to Beaver. Only more perky*
"You okay?" Suddenly Rory's face was in front of his, looking at him quizzically.
"Why wouldn't I be?"
"Well Dawson just reeled off another big, articulate speech filled with words I think even Mr Medina would have to look up, and you just sat there and said nothing. Being quiet for once?"
"Thought I'd try something new," he replied.
The Gilmore's front door again opened admitting Lane and her mother.
"Hey," Rory called from the couch.
"Hey," Lane called back.
"Lane this is Tristan, Tristan this is Lane," said Rory not leaving the sofa.
Tristan got up hurriedly and shook Lane's hand.
"Nice to meet you Lane."
"Same here. Tristan this is my . . ."
"Wait, don't tell me," Tristan started to turn on the charm. "This must be your sister. Hello, it's lovely to . . ."
Thwack! Mrs Kim had clobbered him with her handbag.
"I'm not her sister, you fool. Do I look like a little girl? I am her mother. Do you go to church?" Mrs Kim ranted.
Tristan recoiled.
"Mrs Kim, hi!" Rory interrupted.
"Rory," Mrs Kim replied. "I bring tofu." She held up a bag.
"Oh. Great. Well you can take it on into the kitchen."
Mrs Kim audibly growled at Tristan before leaving for the kitchen.
"That went well, don't you think?" Tristan asked Rory.
"Hey, you made my mother hate you in two seconds flat. You even got the handbag treatment on first meeting. I'm impressed. Ror, this one's a keeper," said Lane grabbing the bowl of popcorn from the coffee table and setting out to devour it.
"Does that mean Lane likes me?" Tristan whispered to Rory.
"Like? Try admire."
Later that night
"Rory, score," Lorelai demanded.
"The Non-Mediocre Hybrids 290, the Kims 297, the Chiltonites 346, and the New Edition Websters 76," Rory reported.
"I told you that name was a jinx," Luke said to Lorelai.
"Ssh. I'm trying to think." Lorelai sat crossed legged on the floor while everyone else was seated at the dining table. She had her left eye close and her lips pursed together. "I got it!"
She got up and laid the tiles on the board.
"Stoopid?" Rory read out.
"That's not right," said Jackson.
"Oh come on. We let you have rasquats," Luke argued.
"Hey, I like having you on my side for a change," Lorelai said to him.
"Me too." Luke smiled at her.
*Wow what a moment. I wonder if anyone else noticed that we just had a moment. I wonder if Luke noticed we had a moment*
"Okay, we'll let her have stoopid," Lane concluded.
All the sudden Lorelai yawned.
"Tired, mom?" Rory asked.
"Yes. All this thinking is making me sleepy. And someone only brought one pot of coffee," Lorelai mumbled.
"Which you didn't share, may I point out," Rory added.
"Sharing one pot of coffee is like sharing one grape. It's pointless," Lorelai philosophised.
"It must be real challenging being your brain," Mrs Kim said.
"Why, thank you."
"That wasn't a compliment."
"Gee mom, you look tired," Rory reiterated.
"I'm so tired that I . . .No, wait. I'm not going to finish that sentence because whatever intelligent, witty reason I give will not give justice to the amount of tiredness that I am currently feeling," Lorelai said.
"Okay, time to wrap up. Rory final score?" Sookie inquired.
"No need," Lorelai said. "I declare the Chiltonites winners of this here Annual Gilmore Scrabbleathon."
"There she goes, making up more words," Mrs Kim said.
"Tristan, Rory, speech if you will," Lorelai said, wisely ignoring Mrs Kim.
"We're so happy we're jumping for joy," Rory said.
"No you're not," Lorelai pointed out.
Rory sighed and dragged Tristan up to standing position.
"Jump," she instructed him.
Tristan was all too familiar with the Gilmore rules to know that if you said you were doing something, you had to do it. That rule in particular was conceived the night that Rory said she make the coffee in the morning, only she didn't with disastrous consequences to the Mr Coffee inflicted upon by Lorelai.
Tristan and Rory started jumping on the spot.
"Much better," Lorelai commented.
The Kims left soon after the game was packed up, followed by Jackson and Sookie. Luke helped clean the mess in the kitchen and secretly made a pot of coffee to be later discovered by Lorelai before heading off on foot. Tristan was sleeping over for the first time . . .
AN: Hehe. I'll have to leave it there for now. I've been typing the last two chapters for four hours and my back kinda hurts and my legs have gone numb. Hope they don't fall off J
Please make me a happy chappie and review. I don't know how long I can keep this story going. I have no idea where it's heading. Let me know what you want to happen cos I'm now open for major suggestions. Submit during office hours only. Just ignore me, I'm going Lorelaiey.
PS: 31 reviews guys? Aww. Thanks. I'm with CMM (no, not literally). Who needs drugs? Write a fanfic and get euphoric on the reviews. So far no nasty reviews (that was a comment, not an invitation). I'm a happy camper. I got that line off Full House. Great sitcom. Too bad they grew up, huh?
And before I forget (again)
(Actually I did forget. I had to resubmit this chapter. Hehe.)
Disclaimer: I take no credit in creating these characters. They are the property of Amy Sherman-Pallidino and WB.
Also, sorry for anyone who was offended by the DC remarks. No harm intended, it was all in good honest fun. DC characters also belong to WB, not me. Like, duh!