A/N: Gee... Uhm... I forgot about this. I just haven't been in the best of moods lately and it's sort of hard to do comedy when males are being arses to you and their girlfriends and your Catholic School is literally telling you that you are "morally wrong" for NOT being Christian (I'm Wiccan... don't stone... go to mothersmagic.net and LEARN about it first!)
Anywho, I'm done making excuses, here is Part II. If it sucks as bad as I think it will, then, I'll prolly delete it and start over. Peace, and thanks for the reviews! To Jaina and Cheese Monster: I vill eat your heart! To everyone else, I hope you enjoy! OH! And, YES the "running dude"! ::grin:: Methinks he is German, Ja?
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Link sighed and threw a small pebble at Tatl. Usually, this activity would cheer him up in an instant. But tonight? No, not tonight. Nothing could get his mind of Antigone, his one true love. With another dramatic sigh, he chucked the last of his rocks at the annoying firefly reject and started walking slowly towards North Clock Town. The Great Fairy would help him. She HAD to.
Far away in the land of Hyrule, a figure clad in a pink robe descended into the Water Temple. The figure's hood was over its head and a pink energy shield guarded her from any wetness, yet her identity was revealed as soon as she stepped onto the platform entrance. "Like, EW! Oh my god, I, like, cannot believe I'm, like, visiting that, like, fish thing! Gah-ross!" With an ever-so dainty sigh, she cleared her throat and in a creepy voice called to the tuna... I mean... Zora. "Ruto... I call upon thee in the name of thy goddesses..." The Zora popped out of the water rather close to Zelda's platform, splashing her. "Calm down, Zelly," replied the fish, ignoring Zelda's panic about her favorite traveling cloak being ruined, "I'm here! And, like, I know what you want, like, Nabby told me!" Zelda rolled her eyes and pulled her hood down VERY slowly, so she wouldn't mess up her hair. "Okay, like, well, then as leader of the, like, Sages I, like, order you to, like, deal with that
Antigone chick. `Kay?" Ruto nodded enthusiastically and smiled as Zelda left. "She thinks I'm going to get ride of Anny so she can have my Linky? I don't think so!" She declared then started off towards the nearest portal to Termia.
Antigone's eyes had not shut for more than half a second since she had come to this blessed spot, near her beloved's home. "O dearest dear one! I cannot bear to not look upon thee for such a great time! I beg you, come to me!" As if he had been listening to her (which he hadn't, btw) the Postman began out on his morning route, ignoring the girl whose eyes were almost as large as the moon had been only a week before. "Postman! Wait! My love, my life! Wait for me! I must speak with you!" Antigone ran after him, and grabbed his shoulders. This was it. "I love you, sweet prince. I cannot live without you. Please, I know I am lowly and not fair upon thy eyes, but hearken to my words! You are my life! My joy! My light! You are my one true soul mate and if you deny me, then there is no telling what I will do. Please, gentle friend. Be mine." The Postman stared at her for a moment, a puzzled look upon his face. "Ich bin, Fräulein traurig, aber ich weiß nicht, was Sie sagen!1" he
finally answered. Antigone's heart stopped for a moment. Her love had replied to her statement, but she didn't know German! Her world truly was crumbling!
Ruto slowly walked through the fields of Termia. She had never seen such a place, being a fish and all. She had spotted a few rather lovely pink flowers on her journey and was now looking for them, instead of Link. A large grin spread across her face as she saw her final flower. She ran over (as fast as a FISH can run) and grabbed it. She eagerly sat down and began to make a crown out of her pretty pink flowers. **RUTO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!** Came the voice of the Princess Zelda in her mind. "I'm making a pretty crown. Aren't the flowers NIFTY? I love them so much, Zelly! I think I'll make one for you and one for Impy and one for Nabby and one for Rauy, he'll like them! Yes he will! He likes pink more than YOU do even!" She giggled and went back to making her crown. **RUTO! FIND. ANTIGONE. AND. DEAL. WITH. HER. I. NEED. MY. LINK. NOW!!!!!!!!** Ruto groaned. "Gee, Zelly, calm down. I'm goin', I'm goin'." Ruto muttered as she finished her crown and placed it on her triangular
head. She then proceeded to skip into Clock Town humming a happy fishy song as she went.
Antigone stared longingly at the Postman, who had given up on the strange little girl and was going through his morning routine. "Oh, but if I could have you as mine own..." she mused dreamily. She did not pay attention to the large fish wearing a flowery crown skipping towards her. "Oooo! There's Anny!" Ruto shrieked with glee, hiding behind a rather thin pole. "Now... how to get rid of her... oh! I've got it!" She waved her hands in a funky gesture that slightly resembled the cheap tricks done in the Jackie Chan flicks. Three blue balls of energy began to appear above her head, in the shape of the Zora's Engagement ring... rock... thing. Antigone, who was still staring at the Postman, seemed to be doomed. But it is at this very moment that our wonderful hero returns from his visit to the great fairy. His eyes grew wide at the sight of his love in danger. "Fear not, my fair lady! I will save you!" He then (very heroically, mind you) yanked his Ocarina (outta Goddess KNOWS
where...::cough:: ) and played Saria's Song. Faster than you can say "Antidisestablishmentarianism", the little Leprechaun came running out. "HiHiHiLink! YouPlayedMySong! That'sSoAwesomeCosIThoughtThatYouForgotAboutMeOrSomethingButYouDidn'tBecauseYouPlayedMySongAndGeeGoshGollyI'veMissedYou! Where'veYouBeen, MyBestestBestBuddy, HuhHuhHuh?!" She squealed as she hugged the life out of Link. "Saria... ::gasp:: look! It's ::gasp:: Ruto!" Link managed to choke out. Saria's already way too wide eyes grew about six times their normal freakish size. "OhMyGoddess! I'mSoHungryICan'tBelieveMyLuck! ImpaToldMeThatRutoWasn'tReallyAZoraButThatShe'sMadeOfTUNA! AndILoveLoveLOVETunaOHSoMuch, Link! IDoDoDo! IT'sTheYummiestThingInTheWorld!" A crazed look came into the elf's eyes... somewhat like that of a cop when he first spies the golden land known as "Dunkin' Doughnuts." A thin line of drool began to slowly creep down her chin. A growling noise could be heard from deep within Saria's throat.
Link uneasily took a few steps back and watched Saria slowly draw a plastic knife and fork (What, you think they let the lil; Kokiri's have REAL silverware?) as she stalked slowly towards Ruto. Ruto, who was busy chanting something in her native fish-tongue to destroy Antigone, did not see Saria until it was too late. The young Sage jumped on Ruto's back and began cackling evilly. Ruto let out an aquatic scream and started running out of town, trying to fling the mad Kokiri off of her.
Link smiled to himself. He had saved his love's life! Now, she would surely notice his perfection! He began to slowly, yet suavely, strut his stuff over to Antigone. Antigone, however, had not even looked up during the whole ordeal. Link was about to open his mouth to say a witty (::snicker:: ) comment to her, when her face lit up. "I've got it! The Great Fairy will help me!" Without a second thought she ran towards North Clock town. Link stared at the spot she'd been in for about five minutes. His brow creased and his mouth closed, finally. After a moment, he finally replied. "Damn."
Pieces of a once flowery and pink vase lay near the entrance of the room. Zelda could be heard wailing on her bed rather naughty words that would make Ganon blush. "I hate her, I hate her, I HATE HER!!" she shrieked. "Waaaaaaaaaaah! It's not fair! Linky should be mine. I'm the star of the damn series! What do I get? Hmmph nothing! Antigone's SO wonderful. Stupid wench. I'll show her! I have Bongo Bongo flatten her! IMPA! IMPA GET IN HERE!!!!!" After a few moments Impa arrives, dressed in green and brow camouflage. "What the heck do you WANT, you spoiled little rat?" Zelda blinked, shocked, but quickly recovered. "Where's your shadow beast! I want you to send it after Antigone!" Impa rolled her eyes. She didn't have time with this. She had a date with that General Grimm, and boy was she looking forward to that. They were going to blow up a somewhat weaker nations population because they were different and therefore evil. How romantic! "Bongo Bongo is on his honeymoon with
Volvagia, remember?" Zelda cursed. "It's not fair! YOU! YOU GO AFTER HER!" Impa muttered under her breath. "This is why the Colonel wouldn't let me bring my bazooka home." Zelda's face twisted maliciously. "WHAT was that?" "Nothing. Fine. Whatever. I get rid of the girl, and then you leave me alone and never talk to me again. Got it?" Zelda nodded, eagerly clapping her hands together and cackling like an idiot. "Goodie Goodie! Finally, Antigone shall perish."
What advice did the Great Fairy give Link? What will she tell Antigone? Will Zelda ever get a grip on reality and leave Impa the f*** alone? Only Time will tell.
1 Ich bin, Fräulein traurig, aber ich weiß nicht, was Sie sagen is German for "I'm sorry, Miss, but I do not know what you are saying", or so I'm told. I hope I got it right.
Anywho, I'm done making excuses, here is Part II. If it sucks as bad as I think it will, then, I'll prolly delete it and start over. Peace, and thanks for the reviews! To Jaina and Cheese Monster: I vill eat your heart! To everyone else, I hope you enjoy! OH! And, YES the "running dude"! ::grin:: Methinks he is German, Ja?
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Link sighed and threw a small pebble at Tatl. Usually, this activity would cheer him up in an instant. But tonight? No, not tonight. Nothing could get his mind of Antigone, his one true love. With another dramatic sigh, he chucked the last of his rocks at the annoying firefly reject and started walking slowly towards North Clock Town. The Great Fairy would help him. She HAD to.
Far away in the land of Hyrule, a figure clad in a pink robe descended into the Water Temple. The figure's hood was over its head and a pink energy shield guarded her from any wetness, yet her identity was revealed as soon as she stepped onto the platform entrance. "Like, EW! Oh my god, I, like, cannot believe I'm, like, visiting that, like, fish thing! Gah-ross!" With an ever-so dainty sigh, she cleared her throat and in a creepy voice called to the tuna... I mean... Zora. "Ruto... I call upon thee in the name of thy goddesses..." The Zora popped out of the water rather close to Zelda's platform, splashing her. "Calm down, Zelly," replied the fish, ignoring Zelda's panic about her favorite traveling cloak being ruined, "I'm here! And, like, I know what you want, like, Nabby told me!" Zelda rolled her eyes and pulled her hood down VERY slowly, so she wouldn't mess up her hair. "Okay, like, well, then as leader of the, like, Sages I, like, order you to, like, deal with that
Antigone chick. `Kay?" Ruto nodded enthusiastically and smiled as Zelda left. "She thinks I'm going to get ride of Anny so she can have my Linky? I don't think so!" She declared then started off towards the nearest portal to Termia.
Antigone's eyes had not shut for more than half a second since she had come to this blessed spot, near her beloved's home. "O dearest dear one! I cannot bear to not look upon thee for such a great time! I beg you, come to me!" As if he had been listening to her (which he hadn't, btw) the Postman began out on his morning route, ignoring the girl whose eyes were almost as large as the moon had been only a week before. "Postman! Wait! My love, my life! Wait for me! I must speak with you!" Antigone ran after him, and grabbed his shoulders. This was it. "I love you, sweet prince. I cannot live without you. Please, I know I am lowly and not fair upon thy eyes, but hearken to my words! You are my life! My joy! My light! You are my one true soul mate and if you deny me, then there is no telling what I will do. Please, gentle friend. Be mine." The Postman stared at her for a moment, a puzzled look upon his face. "Ich bin, Fräulein traurig, aber ich weiß nicht, was Sie sagen!1" he
finally answered. Antigone's heart stopped for a moment. Her love had replied to her statement, but she didn't know German! Her world truly was crumbling!
Ruto slowly walked through the fields of Termia. She had never seen such a place, being a fish and all. She had spotted a few rather lovely pink flowers on her journey and was now looking for them, instead of Link. A large grin spread across her face as she saw her final flower. She ran over (as fast as a FISH can run) and grabbed it. She eagerly sat down and began to make a crown out of her pretty pink flowers. **RUTO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!** Came the voice of the Princess Zelda in her mind. "I'm making a pretty crown. Aren't the flowers NIFTY? I love them so much, Zelly! I think I'll make one for you and one for Impy and one for Nabby and one for Rauy, he'll like them! Yes he will! He likes pink more than YOU do even!" She giggled and went back to making her crown. **RUTO! FIND. ANTIGONE. AND. DEAL. WITH. HER. I. NEED. MY. LINK. NOW!!!!!!!!** Ruto groaned. "Gee, Zelly, calm down. I'm goin', I'm goin'." Ruto muttered as she finished her crown and placed it on her triangular
head. She then proceeded to skip into Clock Town humming a happy fishy song as she went.
Antigone stared longingly at the Postman, who had given up on the strange little girl and was going through his morning routine. "Oh, but if I could have you as mine own..." she mused dreamily. She did not pay attention to the large fish wearing a flowery crown skipping towards her. "Oooo! There's Anny!" Ruto shrieked with glee, hiding behind a rather thin pole. "Now... how to get rid of her... oh! I've got it!" She waved her hands in a funky gesture that slightly resembled the cheap tricks done in the Jackie Chan flicks. Three blue balls of energy began to appear above her head, in the shape of the Zora's Engagement ring... rock... thing. Antigone, who was still staring at the Postman, seemed to be doomed. But it is at this very moment that our wonderful hero returns from his visit to the great fairy. His eyes grew wide at the sight of his love in danger. "Fear not, my fair lady! I will save you!" He then (very heroically, mind you) yanked his Ocarina (outta Goddess KNOWS
where...::cough:: ) and played Saria's Song. Faster than you can say "Antidisestablishmentarianism", the little Leprechaun came running out. "HiHiHiLink! YouPlayedMySong! That'sSoAwesomeCosIThoughtThatYouForgotAboutMeOrSomethingButYouDidn'tBecauseYouPlayedMySongAndGeeGoshGollyI'veMissedYou! Where'veYouBeen, MyBestestBestBuddy, HuhHuhHuh?!" She squealed as she hugged the life out of Link. "Saria... ::gasp:: look! It's ::gasp:: Ruto!" Link managed to choke out. Saria's already way too wide eyes grew about six times their normal freakish size. "OhMyGoddess! I'mSoHungryICan'tBelieveMyLuck! ImpaToldMeThatRutoWasn'tReallyAZoraButThatShe'sMadeOfTUNA! AndILoveLoveLOVETunaOHSoMuch, Link! IDoDoDo! IT'sTheYummiestThingInTheWorld!" A crazed look came into the elf's eyes... somewhat like that of a cop when he first spies the golden land known as "Dunkin' Doughnuts." A thin line of drool began to slowly creep down her chin. A growling noise could be heard from deep within Saria's throat.
Link uneasily took a few steps back and watched Saria slowly draw a plastic knife and fork (What, you think they let the lil; Kokiri's have REAL silverware?) as she stalked slowly towards Ruto. Ruto, who was busy chanting something in her native fish-tongue to destroy Antigone, did not see Saria until it was too late. The young Sage jumped on Ruto's back and began cackling evilly. Ruto let out an aquatic scream and started running out of town, trying to fling the mad Kokiri off of her.
Link smiled to himself. He had saved his love's life! Now, she would surely notice his perfection! He began to slowly, yet suavely, strut his stuff over to Antigone. Antigone, however, had not even looked up during the whole ordeal. Link was about to open his mouth to say a witty (::snicker:: ) comment to her, when her face lit up. "I've got it! The Great Fairy will help me!" Without a second thought she ran towards North Clock town. Link stared at the spot she'd been in for about five minutes. His brow creased and his mouth closed, finally. After a moment, he finally replied. "Damn."
Pieces of a once flowery and pink vase lay near the entrance of the room. Zelda could be heard wailing on her bed rather naughty words that would make Ganon blush. "I hate her, I hate her, I HATE HER!!" she shrieked. "Waaaaaaaaaaah! It's not fair! Linky should be mine. I'm the star of the damn series! What do I get? Hmmph nothing! Antigone's SO wonderful. Stupid wench. I'll show her! I have Bongo Bongo flatten her! IMPA! IMPA GET IN HERE!!!!!" After a few moments Impa arrives, dressed in green and brow camouflage. "What the heck do you WANT, you spoiled little rat?" Zelda blinked, shocked, but quickly recovered. "Where's your shadow beast! I want you to send it after Antigone!" Impa rolled her eyes. She didn't have time with this. She had a date with that General Grimm, and boy was she looking forward to that. They were going to blow up a somewhat weaker nations population because they were different and therefore evil. How romantic! "Bongo Bongo is on his honeymoon with
Volvagia, remember?" Zelda cursed. "It's not fair! YOU! YOU GO AFTER HER!" Impa muttered under her breath. "This is why the Colonel wouldn't let me bring my bazooka home." Zelda's face twisted maliciously. "WHAT was that?" "Nothing. Fine. Whatever. I get rid of the girl, and then you leave me alone and never talk to me again. Got it?" Zelda nodded, eagerly clapping her hands together and cackling like an idiot. "Goodie Goodie! Finally, Antigone shall perish."
What advice did the Great Fairy give Link? What will she tell Antigone? Will Zelda ever get a grip on reality and leave Impa the f*** alone? Only Time will tell.
1 Ich bin, Fräulein traurig, aber ich weiß nicht, was Sie sagen is German for "I'm sorry, Miss, but I do not know what you are saying", or so I'm told. I hope I got it right.