Well, aren't you all happy that I've taken to writing again? I know it's been more or less about a year since I've written, but through that time, I went through a move, a crisis between my friends that could give soap operas a run for their money, the start of high school (Meaning A.P. and honors courses), making new friends, planning my Quinces (The equivalent to a sweet sixteen for a Latin girl) and lots and lots of writer's block, which I'm still going through now. Please take pity on me!
Anyways, thanks to all you that reviewed and thanks to Angela Lee for beta-ing.
Chapter
2-So Much For the Afterglow
You may think me crazy for
doing so, but running away was my only alternative next to hanging myself. I
wasn't accustomed to
leaving things to chance, and hoping everything would be ok. My mother taught
me long ago that my fate rested in my hands, though it took me a few years to
fully understand that. I never realized all that my mother had discreetly
taught me. Every now and then, I would do something, and realize that I learned
this from my mother. Except for a bit of excessive pride, I do believe that my
mother was perfect.
I'm
not sure why it took me so long to see my window of opportunity before. It seems so
evident now, like I should have done it years ago. But the only reason worth
staying was for Mandy.
Mandy, the thought struck me as I walked to
the stables, my bag in hand. What would I do without her? What would she do
without me? What means would she take to find me?
That
worried me most as I mounted Apple. I knew that Mandy could simply state a
spell, and have me back in the manor in a matter of seconds. But right then and
there, I had no wish to be found, no wish to return, no wish to become
nostalgic with the past. What's done is done, and it is about time to make a
new past, one worthy of thinking back on and smiling about. But I was confident
that Mandy would not use magic to find me, she would figure that it was too big
of magic, and would only hope that I would come back. I love Mandy, but I never
understood why she wouldn't use magic often.
The
sun was nearly done as I closed the large door to the stables behind me, and
remounted Apple. Mandy never came to my room once I retired into it, so without
knowing, Mandy had given me about a half day head start.
I
rode silently off the manor, and was faced with something that I hadn't thought
of: I knew I wanted to get far
away from here, but where was I going to go? 'It kills to be spontaneous.' I
thought to myself when I was trying to decide
where I would go. I stood there for half an hour, my mind straying off to other
things, and I decided to find a place to think, a place to think about what I
was going to do, to think about the actions I was going to take that could
change the course of everything (I still had a bit of a belief in fate.).
There
was this ledge at the border of Kyrria that I visited often when I was on an
emotional high, happy or sad. It wasn't terribly far away, and still gave me,
more or less, a choice of where I was going to go. To me, it was the most
amazing sight in all of Kyrria. It overlooked one of the smaller cities in
Ayortha, and was something that took your breath away at first sight. It was
secluded from the rest of town, something that I just happened to stumble on during
one of my many jobs to get random things
for the manor. After that, I went there often, generally just to think
and take a step away from life and recollect the current events.
I
tied Apple up to a fence nearby, the entrance to the ledge being very narrow. I
slid between 2 small, unnoticed stores, and sat on the ledge before looking
down to the town. I always made sure I did this because I once found myself
standing when I glanced at the picturesque scene, and I didn't move for hours.
I was sore all the rest of the day and found great relief in the comfort of my
bed.
It
was very dark, but the light of the crescent moon gave enough of a glimmer to
faintly make out the small little town. It seemed so quaint and untroubled,
untouched by the rest of the world. There was a loveliness to the town that drew me to it, but I never
came too often, for fear that I would one day ruin the feeling that I got when
I came to this place. It was already beginning to wear off, seeing as how I was
able to think straight.
Ayortha
was completely out of the question, for I could not see Areida or risk the
chance of Char seeing me. Bast was something that came to mind, but it was far
off, a few days' distance from the land of the giants. I was willing to make
the journey, but for some reason, it didn't quite fancy me. I decided to leave
Bast to a last resort. Besides, there was a lurking thought in my mind that I
would forever think of the 3 balls when I was there while looking for an orange
carriage.
My
thoughts went to Jenn, and I shuddered. I had to fight off bad memories from
finishing school that were trying to slip into my mind. I thought of other
places in surrounding countries, but I felt no wish to comply with any of
these. I came to another oh-so- familiar city,
when the rustling of sand and rocks flooded
my ears. 'My hiding place has been discovered.' I thought to myself as
I turned around to see who would be the one I would share this sight
with.
Why
did it have to be Char?
**********
I'm
just a stupid, worthless boy, roaming the world, in search of one I can give
myself completely to. But I guess you only find one of those people in a
lifetime. If you're really lucky, you end up living some perfect fairy tale
life with this person, free of any pain or suffering. But, of course, books are
highly overrated.
I
kept telling myself that I would marry any girl that held just a bit of my
interest, and give someone the honor of being queen of Kyrria, and pretending
to love her. Lucky for me, being a prince has taught me how to be a fine actor,
and one tolerant to a great deal of untruth. On the contrary, I would never
find the happiness that I once had. Oh well, life should go on, shouldn't it?
I
apologize in advance
for any hostility or sardonic behavior that I may show. Though I hate to admit
it, this behavior is what keeps me sane. Time is supposed to be the best healer
of all pain. For me, all time has taken a vacation from any movement
whatsoever, because the pain I feel now is the equivalent to what I felt months, days, weeks, years
ago, and there is no surrender from it. I had to conform to it, make it part of myself, for if I didn't, it
would eat me alive. It was like a leech, sucking on your blood, and feeling no
remorse for the involuntarily suffering that it put you through. Agreeing with
it somehow blunted it, made it less of a bother, but not significantly enough. I mean, I'm
still alone, still stripped of any happy feeling that the average person feels
daily.
Seclusion
was the result. My tolerance was high, but my expectations were of the same
caliber. I always found myself comparing everyone and everything to her, but
nobody could come close. I did keep my word, and never wrote or spoke of her,
unless I was questioned about her, and even then I said very little,
nonetheless, it was never very flattering.
I
often kept to myself, the emptiness of a room becoming something I could relate
with. Few knew about my heartbreak, but all knew about my sadness. It was rather hard to miss.
One day, I was just a cheery, love struck boy, and the next, I slam doors into
the faces of the only people that care genuinely about me because I can't stand
to see them as happy as they are, without a care in the world, just wondering
about what they're going to wear, or what county to battle ogres in today. They
had no clue, and I wasn't about to let down my guard.
After
a while, I found rebellion. At first, I didn't care about what my smart tongue
said to my family, but I realized that I was destroying my family, and that I was no longer useful,
but a family burden, only tolerated because I was family, ready to be discarded
if it were somehow discovered that I wasn't of sovereign blood.
This
led to getting as far away from my family as possible. I never wanted them to feel
to even the smallest degree what I was feeling, and the greater the distance,
the less destruction I could do. I would only grace the castle with my presence
every so often when my physical self craved a feeding. I would have just let
myself settle and die, but what would that say about the royal family to have a
manic depressive son?
Eventually,
I would be gone for weeks on end, roaming the far away lands that were Kyrria.
I would steal for food, since I was no longer distinguishable as the prince. I hadn't cared too much
for my appearance, but
I once did take a look at myself, and noticed that I had dramatically changed.
Boredom usually takes a great deal of time before it reaches me, but it didn't
waste its time during this period of my life. I would just walk around, feeling
sorry for myself for what I didn't have, and curse all the people that had what
I wanted. But then I had something that very few people have: the servitude of
many loyal soldiers.
I
once again took the position of the leader of my ranks to search for ogres. It
was refreshing, but always reminded me greatly of her. I didn't mind, though,
for they were always good memories, the memories that pained me the most barely
ever coming to me. I found something I thought I would never find again.
Happiness.
It
was slow to coming, as are all my emotions, but once I feel something, it is
usually slow in fleeting. I still loved her, but it became something that I was
able to push to the back of my mind and concentrate on what I had before me,
and how lucky I really was. I knew that love would never come again in such a
strong form, but I was willing to settle for anything that was half as great as
she was. Unfortunately,
most came up short, and I found that when I was with the few that seemed
slightly interesting, I would only think about what she would say, or what she
would do. It was always a game that I often played, since she was never very
predictable.
But
still, I found myself quite content with my current situation. We were in Ayortha
often, and always stayed at this one inn that was owned by a girl and her
parents that used to know her. We don't talk often, except to pass this on the
table, or pass that. I do believe that she is still bitter about what I said
about Ella. She probably still believes her to be the fun, spontaneous, happy-go-lucky girl that she pretended to
be. If she refuses to believe the truth, it is not my problem.
On
one such occasion, we were all sitting at the dining room table, my men
conversing of all they had done today, with me putting in my 2 cents every now
and then. And then fate had to step in.
There,
in the doorway of the dining room was Ella.
**********
"Didn't
fancy seeing you here." He said to me, taking a seat a few feet away from
me. I was still trying to get over the initial shock that he was so close to
me, that I could reach out and touch him, that he had actually said something
to me. But he did not seem phased by my appearance.
He just looked out to the beautiful vista, not saying or doing anything. I
wasn't sure if I was to keep quiet or come up with a witty line to show that he
was just another boy in my life.
"Pity
you can't destroy me now, isn't it? Or was that even your intention in the
first place?" He said after a long silence. It was dripping with sarcasm.
He didn't turn to me, but I was sure that
he expected an answer.
"Can
we stop being so cryptic, and come out with what we want to say?" I said,
giving him a taste of his own behavior, though it pained me to do it.
He
turned to me, like I was clued out of something that I should know. He gave a
little laugh and said, "I went to your manor the other day, after seeing
you at the inn. I wanted to find something of yours so I could destroy it. But
it just so happens that Dame Olga had taken over it. Don't ask me how, but I
had to endure 2 hours of Hattie's false flattery. She informed me that you were
never married, and that you had run off, probably lying dead somewhere. Of
course, I could tell that much for myself."
"And
nothing more?" I pushed away all my feelings for him, and was determined
to let him have it. It wasn't easy, but I knew it had to be done.
"Was
there something else I should have discovered?"
"I
just figured that the crown prince of Kyrria could put two and two
together." I said, standing up, and putting one hand on his shoulders. I
had him where I wanted him. I whispered
loudly to him, "I'm sorry to tell you like this, but it's all
rather obvious."
"Really?"
He said, grabbing my hand, and lightly taking it off his shoulder. "If it
is so evident, then why don't you tell me what I'm missing?"
He
had me there. I wasn't prepared to tell a story to him, but I learned there
that I work well under pressure. "Come on! I really like you, Char,"
I said, flashing a phony smile. "but not that much. I was also being
pushed by my so-called 'family' to get married to some old, rich man. So I
decided to run off, but since I'm so sincere," I said, slipping my arm
around his neck. "I went to the balls to tell you all of this before I was
to run away. But my plan was spoilt
by Hattie, and since you're being so hostile to me now, I have decided
to take no pity on you." I sat back down, leaving Char more confused than
before.
"Well,
I'm sorry for indulging in all my feelings to you. You must have had a good
laugh when I told you all that." He said hastily, getting up from the
ledge and walking away. If only he could have seen my face then.
The spell did funny things to me. I once asked Mandy to countermand one of my mother's
commands, and it didn't work. She then countermanded one of her own commands,
and it was successful.
Mandy and I tried many times to work around the curse, but it seemed to be very
precise and complicated. I wanted to tell Char about my curse so I could send
him on his way, where closure can be achieved. But, life just never works that
way. He slid through the 2 small stores, and was out of sight. He didn't need
to look at me, but I could tell that I had caused him a great deal of
pain.
I
wanted to break down into tears, run to Char, and tell him everything. But that
simple command, to never tell anyone about the curse, was enough to keep me
back. It kept me in my place, biting my lip to prevent tears from running down
my cheeks.
The
ledge had then lost all its magic.
Ok, I hope you guys liked that, but here's my problem: I'm a bit stuck for what I should have our characters do after this. I have some ideas, but they're all kinda, well, stupid. Anyways, review, and tell me what you think.
-Mystery Girl
