Nameless Face of Happiness

by Lune Nightingale

It seems everything has come to a tragic end. Or is it? Maybe things aren't as bad as Sakura and the others think, and Eriol won't have to feel so guilty....

7. Forgotten Past

Title: Forgotten Past (Chapter 7)

Genre: Card Captor Sakura Fic

Rating: PG… I decided PG-13 isn't quite applicable… o.o

Pairings: Same as before. ^_^

Notes: I know nothing about Magic. And I can't say that I regret that, but I tried to make Even as believable as possible.

Warnings: I could never make a really bad, bad guy. O.o;;

Disclaimer: Where I don't own any of the CCS gang, I did create Even, Crinis, and Sidereal. http://www.angelfire.com/tx2/andromedastar/ccsakura/EvenCrinis.JPG

~ I shall go the way of the open sea,

To the lands I knew before you came,

And the cool ocean breezes shall blow from me,

The memory of your name.

-Laurence Hope

"So… You're cutting Eriol some slack?" Sidereal lay stomach down on the couch watching her master in the center of the room. His long ebony hair was unbraided and seemed to ripple about him like a grassy field in the midst of a strong wind. Beneath his feet, a silver and gold circle glowed brightly in the dimly lit room containing a circle inside of a seven pointed star that was quartered. Framing the symbol, were two other circles with twisting ivy in between them.

The young teen didn't look to her and just smiled softly in response. "Nyett."

"Then what exactly are you doing, Even-san?" Slowly the circle disappeared from beneath his feet as he turned to gaze upon his moon guardian with sparkling eyes of violet.

"Leave his friends out of it. It seems his attitude of late has caused those around him a lot of emotional pain. I do not like seeing this." Sidereal sighed softly and shook her head in disbelief.

"You're confusing me…"

"Is that such a hard thing to do?" Crinis looked over at her only sibling and twitched her ears in a teasing fashion.

"Crinis… You're asking for it…" The girl turned to the black and white kitten with a look that spoke of a painful death in her vibrant eyes of gold.

"That's enough you two…" Silently and swiftly, the two females wilted at his words. "You two at times are very entertaining, but right now I need to think…" Even turned to the mirror and looked at his reflection calmly before blinking in surprise. "Remind me again Sidereal… why I have my hair this length…"

Instantly her eyes began to sparkle as she ran up behind her master and peered over his shoulder. "Cause you look so cool with it this long! It matches the whole dark sorcerer guise!"

A dark ebony brow rose only slightly as he met her eyes in the mirror. In a monotone voice he spoke to her before turning away. "I look like a girl…"

"WHAT?!!? Not true! How could you say that?! I think you look great!" Sidereal nearly screeched as she fell on her knees giving him a look that spoke of hurt and betrayal. "EVEN!!!!"

One by one his fingers twitched as he fought the urge to give in to that look she gave him so many times before. But once again, he felt himself giving in. "Fine… Sorry. It looks great."

Sidereal instantly cried out for joy and threw her arms about the boy's neck hugging him tightly. On the coffee table, Crinis groaned softly and shook her head. "For being so elegant in public… you'd never believe her to be a fashion freak." Even nodded sadly and sighed in defeat due to his new found knowledge. He was never going to be able to cut his hair at this rate.

Prying himself loose from her grasp, he walked over to the window and peered out onto the city. Everything was so quiet and it made him wish he were back home. Stopping, he couldn't help but allow a sad expression to enter his features. "Where… is home…?"

From behind him, the two female guardians blinked in surprise before trying to speak to him in a comforting manner. "What are you thinking about Master?" Landing softly on the young man's shoulder, Crinis peered questioningly at him with bright light blue eyes.

"I'm not sure anymore… I seem to be forgetting…" Even shook his head slowly and then dropped it against the cool glass. "Is it England that I miss…. Or Ukraine? Or maybe one of the many other places that I've been to."

Sidereal rested a hand lightly on his other shoulder and then leaned her head against his in a comforting fashion. "Does it really matter Master? Home is where the people you love are… Crinis and I love you… therefore… whenever you come back to us, we consider you to be home…"

At her words, he smiled lightly and closed his eyes. "I don't know… what I'd do without you two…"

"Be miserable and depressed? Even… we know it's been hard on you. You have two adopted parents back in Ukraine that don't even care where you are, and you're real parents you never even knew. You've spent most of your life thus far traveling from country to country studying abroad trying your best to leave the pain behind. We want you to be happy…" Sidereal gently brushed the long raven colored hair behind his ear and smiled lightly. "You're always worried about whether everyone else is happy… now what about you?"

At this, Even looked up to her with wide eyes of amethyst not know how to respond to her question. She was right, he'd never thought about himself before. His happiness never mattered in the past. "Master… your happiness matters to us. And don't give us the whole 'I'm happy if you're happy' line. We know better…"

Turning his head to peer at Crinis, he couldn't help but smile. "When did you two get so in depth and intelligent in these matters?"

"Heh heh… One doesn't live with you as long as we have without picking up your intelligence. Now… Lets get out of this hole were in and go out to eat! I'm starved!" The girl with long blue hair jumped slightly and spun about sending a sea of hair whirling about her.

"For someone who doesn't eat, you sure do it a lot… How do you keep that figure?" Crinis eyed the other girl intently as her wings twitched in annoyance.

"Hm… I'm not sure. But that doesn't matter! Can we go out Even-san? Onegai?!"

"All right… Just this once…" Turning about, Even walked over to the mirror and picked up Sidereal's brush that she always left there on the coffee table not far from it. Silently he worked it through his hair before mechanically braiding it back into it's normal state all the while listening to the bickering between his two creations. As annoying as it could get, he loved them all the same.

~*~

Knocking on the door persistently, the lithe teen grumbled under his breath in impatience. "ERIOL-SAN! I know you're in there!" Normally bright eyes of violet took on a dark aura as he highly considered the idea of using magic. Lifting his wrist into view he gaped at the watch there. "I've been here for thirty minutes Eriol-san… As much as you don't want to see me… I've got all day to stand out here! Nakuru-san has to come home sometime… so either let me in now or I'll just come in when she gets home!" Inside he heard the faint sounds of a person walking by with no intent of answering the door.

Even let a sour look pass over his face as he leaned against the door facing. "Stubborn brat… Just like master Clow…" Tugging on his braid, he knew he'd be stuck out there for a long time.

"What did you say?" Just on the other side of the door he could hear Eriol inquiring in a somewhat impatient manner.

"I said that YOU ARE A STUBBORN BRAT! Will you PLEASE let me in? I need to talk to you…" There was a moment of silence before he heard the footsteps heading away from the door.

"I don't want to see anyone." At Eriol's words, Even balled his hands up into fists trying desperately to control his temper.

On the other side of the door, Eriol was walking casually up the stairs heading for his room with a blank expression on his face. He didn't know why he didn't want to see Even, but he really didn't care at this point. He was so paranoid that he could've sworn he heard the teen call him Clow. Shaking his head dismally, he continued to climb the stairs ignoring the pleas from outside of his front door.

Giving a long sigh, Even couldn't help but toy with the idea of breaking the door down. Who would've thought that Eriol would be so stubborn. He needed to fix the boy's emotions soon or he would have to see Daidouji's tears once again. That ran the risk of bringing tears to Sakura's lovely jade eyes, and in turn, it would seriously upset the moon guardian he swore to make happy.

At this point, it didn't seem that things could get any worse. Lifting up off of the frame of the door, he turned his head to look at the large mansion that the Clow reincarnation lived in. Remaining silent for a moment, he allowed himself to blow off some steam by cursing the building in a long string of Russian. In the midst of the string of words, he heard the sound of timid footsteps behind him.

Spinning around, his eyes met with a very startled Sakura. At her side, a tall young man with long white hair stood with his profile to him and his eyes closed. Feeling the warmth rush into his cheeks, he tried his best to smile at the pair calmly. "I'm sorry you heard that… He's home if you're wondering… but he's sort of stubborn…"

Suddenly, Yue looked over at the teen on the doorstep with wide eyes. Something was so familiar about the boy and he didn't quite know what it was. "What language were you speaking?"

Even looked up at Yue with wide amethyst eyes and fought the urge to blush further. The moon guardian looked just as he remembered him. The same beautiful hair, porcelain complexion, and silvery white hair that rivaled a true pearl. "R-Russian…"

"Kakkoii! You sounded so cool! What were you saying…?" Sakura blinked a few times in complete innocence having no clue that he had been cursing the house and not trying to converse.

"Ano… Nothing important… Forgive me for the spectacle I made of myself."

"Ah… Oh! Even-kun! You met Kero-chan, so I assume that you already know Yue-san!" Even's eyes went wide at her words as he avoided the piercing gaze that Yue sent in his direction.

"I don't know if we've met… I am sorry that I have no memory if we had. If you'll…"

"Yue-san! This is Starlet Even. He's in my class and he transferred from Ukraine. Kero-chan says he was a friend of Clow Reed's." Smiling brightly, she didn't see Even's repose melt almost instantly.

"A friend of Master Clow? May I ask your name in your previous lifetime?" Even looked up slowly only to see an elegant brow of silvery white arched in expectation.

"I… I was…" The ebony haired boy felt his heart jump as Yue took a few steps closer and made complete eye contact with him. This was definitely not looking good for him, and if things persisted, Eriol would know the truth as well. Sighing in defeat, he knew he couldn't lie to the silver blue cat eyes of the precious moon angel he'd died for in his last life. "Forgive me, my dear Yue… I didn't want you to know that I was reborn… You were better off… Not knowing…"

Instantly Yue's eyes widened in surprise at the way that Even addressed him. It was so familiar, as though if he reached out he could touch the memory. "You… You're very familiar…"

Sakura, meanwhile, was smiling brightly listening to the exchange of words until she saw that Yue looked near the verge of tears. Rushing forward, she gently laid a hand on his shoulder and peered into his eyes with worry written clearly on her face. "Daijoubu, Yue-san?"

"Hai…" Looking back to Even, the realization hit him hard. "Starlet… Even… Even Starlet. Evenstar! Orrin?" A shadow seemed to fall over Even's eyes as he looked to the ground. "You're… alive? Please! Tell me what happened back then! There's no way that…"

Raising a hand in order to halt his words, Even didn't want to answer that question just yet. "Sweet Yue… I don't wish to think of that right now. But rest assured that I will tell you sometime soon. I'd appreciate if you two would not spread this around. Especially not to Eriol-san. I don't want anyone to know that I know magic. It was merely an accident that Sakura and Keroberos found out."

"Keroberos knew? Why didn't you tell me?" Silver blue eyes flared in anger at the boy before him trying not to let the rage inside of him take control. For so many years he had hidden all of his emotions from the world, and now, since he'd found a new life with Sakura, his past was starting to come back to haunt him.

"I asked him not to… Yue… Please, I'll talk with you later. Come to my apartment sometime… Sidereal knows where I live. Please excuse me. Laspitanya." (A.N. I can't spell Russian stuff. Sorry.) With that, the boy brushed past them briskly trying to hide his expression from the pair.

Sakura gently looped her arm in Yue's looking up at him with concern. Yue's eyes never left Even's back as he walked away noticing that something was missing from the gait he had in his previous life. Shaking his head, he looked down to Sakura and attempted to smile at her minutely. "Yue-san…"

"Hm?" Sakura blinked at his sudden lack of emotion and felt her heart sinking.

"Never mind… are you ok?" Yue met her sparkling eyes of emerald and pondered how to respond for a moment. He wasn't ready to tell her about his past. They were better left right where they were untouched.

"Hai. Don't worry…" Turning back to Eriol's front door he was surprised to see the dark blue eyes of Eriol staring at them intensely.

"Is he gone?" Eriol looked about quickly to make sure before stopping on Yue and Sakura once more. "What are you two doing here? Do you need something?"

It wasn't a rude tone of voice, nor one of irritation, it was merely a sound of a very tired human being that wasn't quite aware of their surroundings. Sakura looked to him sadly and stepped forward to meet him eye to eye. "Eriol-san… I need to talk to you."

Yue nodded slowly and stood behind his mistress giving Eriol the impression that there was more to the moon being's protective behavior. Blinking slowly, the boy with blue-black hair stepped aside and meekly granted them entrance. "Please come in."

Moments later, the three were seated in his living room with Eriol in a large over stuffed armchair. Sakura couldn't bear to see him look like this. He was almost completely lifeless and no hint of the shine he had existed any longer. "Eriol-san… Please tell me what has been bothering you. We're all worried about you. Even Nakuru-san and Even-kun seem worried…"

"I'm fine…" Yue peered at Eriol in disbelief but remained silent. Eriol was the last person he wanted to see at this point in time. He was quite content with his life now with Sakura. More than just content, he was happy for the first time in his life. Where happiness had been flightier than a wild bird when he was with Clow, he now felt a steady flow of happiness especially when Sakura was near.

Eriol met his gaze and tilted his head in curiosity. "Yue… how are you?"

Both Sakura and Yue blinked in surprise. Eriol had never asked that question of Yue before, and it was a mystery to them what had brought it about now. "I'm fine."

Looking between the card mistress and her guardian, he stopped and managed to smile for the first time in weeks. "Sakura-chan… Do I have the right to assume that you and Yue are closer?"

Instantly the young teen blushed and lowered her eyes to the floor beneath her feet. "Ano… Etto… You see…"

"Hai… On both accounts." Eriol and Yue made eye contact at that moment bringing Sakura into total silence. A silver white brow arched elegantly as he finally looked away in order to gaze at Sakura. "I have a promise that I know is meant to outlast eternity…"

Eriol blinked a few times at the statement and wondered where he had heard it before. "I'm glad… I'm glad to know that you two are happy…" Once more the room was submerged in silence making Sakura very uncomfortable.

Bright emerald eyes stared at Eriol intently as she spoke in a hopeful voice. "Eriol-kun… I know that you aren't happy. Something is bothering you… and… we all miss you…"

This sent a flicker through Eriol's eyes for a brief moment, but it soon faded away as self-conviction drug his spirits into a downward spiral. "No one needs me…"

This comment caught Yue by utter surprise. In all truth, Eriol was now reminding him of his own inner voice that had caused him to live in a secluded and icy world all of his own, granting no one entrance. Shaking his head, he didn't know what to think of the matter. "Eriol-sama…"

At his cool tone, Eriol turned back to him and peered at him with sad midnight eyes. "Will you ever forgive me Yue-san? Someday?"

Suddenly, the door flew open and Nakuru ran into the room smiling broadly. "Eriol-san! I'm home! Are you… Eh? Yue-san? Sakura-chan?" Sparkling eyes of brown drifted to each person in the room in surprise. "I thought Eriol-san didn't want to see anyone…"

"I don't… If you'll excuse me…" Ignoring Sakura's pleas, Eriol headed out of the room and up the staircase while calling over his shoulder. "Please show them out Ruby Moon…"

Nakuru sighed heavily and drooped her shoulders. "I wish master would come to his senses…"

"I wish he would too…" Sakura stood up and frowned sadly as she closed her eyes.

Standing to his feet, Yue felt his own heart hurt at the sight of her sadness. Letting a hand fall on her shoulder lightly, he was graced with a small smile that spoke louder than words. She was all right, just very upset that one of her friends was in so much pain. Nakuru looked at the two of them and smiled broadly while clapping her hands. "Yue-san! You and Sakura-chan are together, ne?"

"Hn…" Looking away, Yue merely listened to the two girls chat happily with one another as Nakuru begged for all of the details. He had other things on his mind and they were driving him to the brink of sanity. Had it not been for Sakura, he would have sworn that they would have had to lock him away. First he finds out that Even was formerly Orrin, and now Eriol was on some sort of redemption quest and becoming a hermit. It was too much, and he had a strange feeling that they were both connected.

~*~

Even sat upon his sofa with his face buried in one of the cushions sitting upon it. How could this be happening? It wasn't fair. All he had wanted to do was make everyone happy and settle a score between he and Clow. Others weren't supposed to get involved. Sidereal was out at the moment, and he just knew she would be leading Yue straight to him. Just what he needed.

Thinking back, Even could remember the night that Yue had some how changed his icy cold heart. One good turn deserved another, did it not? At first, all he wanted was to kill Clow and attain the status and title of the strongest magician in the world, now, all he wanted was to heal the hurt he had seen in Yue's heart. Was that so wrong?

He'd succeeded in getting Yue together with his mistress and Sidereal had succeeded in helping Nakuru become a lady instead of an annoying girl. He figured that Touya wouldn't be able to resist her if only he'd give her a chance. Crinis was even getting along with Keroberos and the two frequently visited one another in order to play video games. As a matter of fact, she was over at Sakura's right at that moment. Letting out a labored breath, he fought the urge to crawl under his bed and pretend that he wasn't home. He truly didn't want to face Yue right now.

Unfortunately, he was never meant to be happy in his mind and it was around that moment that he heard someone tapping on the window of his balcony. Sighing softly, he lifted his head in order to see Yue standing on the other side of the glass with his arms crossed. Wiping his face, he found that he'd been crying. It was a drastic shock to him. Taking a quick glance in the mirror, he straightened his hair and made sure his eyes were somewhat clear before walking to the window and opening it.

The moon being nodded curtly in reply to him then brushed past him hurriedly to stand with his back to the young mage. Tracing his eyes over Yue's back, he was happy to see that Yue hadn't changed the length of his silver white tresses. Now he understood why Sidereal obsessed over his hair and swore he wouldn't aggravate her about it again. "Hello… Yue…"

Without looking at him, Yue walked over to the sofa and sat down never once glancing at the teen. "Orrin… Tell me why… Sidereal said she wouldn't be back for a while and that we could talk…" Looking up sharply, Even felt his heart crumble under Yue's gaze. "So?"

Taking a deep breath, Even walked to the chair across from Yue and sat down slowly. "You want to know why I died…" The moon angel nodded slowly in response never once taking the piercing gaze off of the young mage. "I… I used a spell that had a backlash. In order for it to work, it had to kill me…"

Instantly Yue's brow arched in question. "What was the spell?"

"It was a curse…" This caused the moon guardian's eyes to widen in surprise. "You didn't think I would do such a thing… did you? I suppose there were a lot of things about me you never knew. Please forgive me… I never wanted you to be hurt. I tried desperately to make you happy…"

Thinking silently to himself, Yue finally looked up at him with narrowed eyes. "You were the one that called me for Sakura-san the other day… Weren't you?" Even nodded slowly and looked to the window trying to hide his sad expression.

"I see you two have finally gotten together. I knew you would find someone perfect for you… Are you happy with her?" The guardian nodded slowly causing Even to smile slightly. "Did I not promise that you would be one day?

Yue nodded to this slowly feeling the sadness creep into his eyes. "You did. Did you come here in order to make sure that I was?"

Even nodded again slowly without looking at Yue. "I've been traveling most of my life. I didn't know what I should do. Finally, I decided I should come and see if you were all right. I hadn't meant for you to know that I was here…"

"Why does everyone insist on hiding things from me? Sakura-san seems to be the only one who is ever truthful with me… Both you and Eriol and/or Clow have done nothing but lie to me…" The icy repose returned to the being with white hair as he crossed his arms and closed his eyes.

Silently, Even began to mess with the end of his braid. "You… have every right to hate me…"

"I don't… I don't think I could… I'm just angry…"

"As you should be…"

"Tell me something, Evenstar… On your quest for my happiness… did you forget you?" Even instantly looked up with wide eyes of amaryllis unable to reply. This was not what he expected. Sakura was already having an affect on the guardian even if he hadn't realized it.

"…Nyett… though… that doesn't matter. " Even shook his head slowly and stood up quickly. Turning his back on Yue, he walked over to the window and leaned against it slightly. "You're the second one to ask me that recently. And I've put a lot of thought into it. And the only happiness I can think of… is too far away. I prefer to see others happy. That makes me happy enough."

"You've changed…"

"Have I? I suppose you are correct… I had a major change in my life after I met you during my life as Orrin. Now… this life… has had an affect on me as well. Life was never meant to be easy I suppose…" Yue looked at him calmly before standing and crossing the room to stand behind him. Catching Even's eyes in the reflection on the window, he was surprised to see a sadness there that even he had never experienced before. "My dear Yue… I have gotten what I deserve…"

Yue couldn't believe what he was seeing and hearing. Maybe he hadn't been the victim as he had thought. Getting hurt caused a mind to become narrow and closed, maybe that's why he'd never seen this before. Resting a hand gently on Even's shoulder he couldn't help but forgive the man that he had accused of abandoning him before. "Tell me… What makes your life so painful…"

Even turned slowly and met the eyes of silver blue and smiled weakly. "It's all right, dear Yue. I do not need pity… Thank you though…" Pushing his ebony bangs from his eyes, he managed to grin at the other man. "I see that Sakura-chan has quite an affect on you. I wish you two all the happiness in the world."

"Arigauto…"

"Not a problem… None what-so-ever."

~*~

Large paws of brilliant white gently touched down onto the tile flooring of the balcony outside of Hiiragizawa Eriol's bedroom. In accordance, the fascinating beast raised her eyes of cerulean blue to gaze at the glass doors curiously, wondering if anyone had noticed her arrival. Stretching in a feline fashion, she reveled in the feel of her true form as the tiger with the wings of the mythical pixie. Yawning, she turned to the outside darkness and smiled rather broadly. "It seems that they didn't know we have arrived."

In the tree not too far from the window, a figure moved in response to the lovely alto voice of the Siberian white tiger. "It would seem so. Shall we use a little more magic to get his attention?"

"I suppose I could master, but if you do, he might find you out. That's not what you want is it?" The tiger turned her body to face his direction while smiling warmly. The iridescent wings on her back unfurled then folded again revealing what appeared to be a stained glass window display beneath the faint light of the overcast sky.

"And how do you plan to do so? Most of your magic is attack magic… And I'd wager that you would never dream of destroying another's property." The boy in the trees let off a hint of laughter in his voice as he leaned his body against the tree beneath his veil of shadows.

"You know me too well… But that's why…" For a moment the animal's eyes started to sparkle in revelry. "I love you so much!"

"You amaze me Crinis-chan… Now… if you have any ideas… Carry them out swiftly. Morning will approach soon enough, and we're running out of time."

"Fine, fine…" Approaching the double doors, she sat upon her haunches and rose up her front feet in almost a humanistic manner. At times, the filtered light of the moon glinted off of her three-strand collar consisting of silver English ivy, as well as the vine that raveled around her front leg. Resting the immense paws on the handle, she attempted to open the door only to find it locked with the use of magic. "Eriol-san is very clever, master…"

"He'd have to be… After all… He does know of our presence." Suddenly the boy wove a long staff at the door bringing about a hollow click that sounded prior to the opening of the door. Crinis smiled softly and looked over her shoulder to peer at Even with gentle eyes. Nothing the boy did ever disappointed her, and there was nothing she wouldn't do for him.

Pushing the door open wide with the top of her silken head, she finally made her way into the room with near silent footsteps. Stopping just inside, she marveled at the boy tossing and turning on the bed. It must be a nightmare, for he hadn't even noticed their presence. Shaking her head, she felt pity for the teenage magician. It wasn't his choice to be Clow Reed. He was probably much like Even in the effect that they both wanted to live a normal life. But in time, old scores had to be settled no matter what the cost. She understood that. Even if she only understood it for her master. It was common knowledge to her and her older sister that Even had no intention of killing the boy with midnight blue eyes and alabaster skin.

As she timidly stepped forward, she felt a pair of eyes resting upon her with a mixture of protectiveness and surprise. In moments a massive animal of midnight fur lurched in front of her and crouched in a defensive position ready to pounce at any moment. Hissing in a threatening voice, the panther flared out his large butterfly wings in order to block the way to his beloved master. "Who are you and what do you want? I will not allow you to hurt my master…"

Crinis blinked in slight surprise before settling down on her haunches and smiling brightly. "How nice to see you Spinel Sun… Please don't be so hasty. I'm here only to get his attention. I was not created to attack Eriol-san…" Pawing the ground lightly, she turned her head to peer out the doors, which she had entered through. "Please wake your master and bring him onto the balcony. My master wishes to speak with him…"

Standing slowly, the tiger turned and headed out of the door onto the balcony then hopped up into the tree only to fade into the shadows. Spinel watched for a moment trying to make sure that there was no threat before turning back to the disturbed mage asleep on the bed. Walking over to him, he gently nudged the boy with his muzzle and spoke to him softly. "Eriol-san… Please wake up…"

One midnight blue eye opened, then the other only to rest on the true form of his beloved sun guardian. Reaching out a shaking hand, he lighted it on the cat's head with the utmost gentleness. "Was I having a nightmare? Gomen ne Spinel-san…" Turning to the bedside table, he carefully picked up his glasses and placed them on. Suddenly the feeling hit him. The aura of magic closely related to his own was just outside his window and it made his skin crawl. "Spinel-san…"

Spinel nodded slowly then looked to the doors. "The sorcerer seems to want to speak with you. One of his guardians some how made it in and was in your room… I'm sorry I didn't sense them sooner. She promised you no harm…"

Eriol nodded slowly then forced himself out of the bed. Shakily he walked over to the balcony clutching the sun key tightly in his right hand. Taking a deep breath, he prayed to himself that they were not here to fight. He was far too tired to even think about fighting in this condition. "Who's there?" Immediately his hand fell to his side to rest on the panther's shoulder blades for support.

"Good evening Eriol-san. I believe we've met before." The gentle tenor filtered out from the darkness into his ears, causing him to search the shadows intently with tired eyes.

"I don't believe we have… Unless you're the one that's been sending me visions and dreams… I hope you're happy with you work thus far…" Eriol felt a slight twinge of anger directed mostly at him self for letting some unknown force penetrate his heart like this one had.

"Yes… I did send them to you. And I apologize for the trouble they've caused… That's why I'm here. I want you to see the truth… but not make others suffer because of it. Where I want you to suffer… I don't want your loved ones to."

Crinis leapt onto the railing and sat upon it elegantly while swishing her long black and white tail through the air. "Eriol-san… We want you to see how you are making things worse." Peering at Spinel with gentle eyes, the tiger let out a soft purr. "How long has it been since you've slept Spinel-san? How many nights have you slept outside of your master's door worrying over him?"

The panther shrank back slightly and lowered his eyes in a tired manner. Eriol instantly looked down on the beast in surprise and lowered to his knees beside him. "Spinel-san… Have you really?" The cat nodded slowly and looked away trying not to let his master see the fatigue in his eyes. "I'm so sorry…" Instantly Eriol threw his arms about the feline's neck and hugged him tightly.

"My sister has seen a major anguish in Ruby-san as well… She's very worried about you. Haven't you noticed that she is home more often and cooks for you regularly, yet every time you shun her and her efforts? It hurts when someone you love does such a thing…" Eriol looked up at the tiger quietly with a clear sheen over his indigo eyes.

"I… didn't realize it… I thought…"

"That they'd be better off without you? Well, I would have said yes, but the fact that they have learned to love you should prove that they aren't. Open your eyes Eriol-san… Embrace them, don't push them away. That's what love is. I wanted you to realize that and not hurt them as you have. I didn't mean to be so effective. Besides, have you ever seen that poor girl cry?" The boy in the shadows let his voice drift away revealing the guilt that was evidently in his heart.

"Tomoyo-chan? I thought that… She's never cried in front of me… She's stronger than that…"

"Girls like to make you think they are strong Eriol-san…" Crinis rose to her feet and hopped onto the ground. Stalking toward him slowly she couldn't help but smile as he hugged his guardian tighter. "Please rethink the matter… Daidouji-san truly cares about you. We don't like seeing her cry. We never intended to hurt her. From now on… let's keep this conflict between us… and leave the ones we love out."

Even smiled to himself slightly at his guardian's words. She knew exactly what he had wanted to say. He'd messed up and he admitted to it, but now they needed to be serious. "Eriol-san… Clow-san… Which ever you wish to be called… From now on, it's between you and I. My guardian's were not created to hurt you, nor those you love. They are here mostly to protect them and help them grow. But in your case, you'll have to deal with me, one…on…one…"

Eriol froze in spot and looked in the direction of the shadowed figure in the trees. "Here and now?"

"No… Later. I want to tell you who I am… and why before I do anything rash. But I won't tell you now. I want to make sure things are set right before then. It's up to you Eriol-san… I'm giving you time, use it wisely. We will go now. Crinis-chan, let's go home." Even turned and waved his staff lightly in a gesture to the black and white feline.

Crinis looked to her master and smiled happily before turning back to Eriol and Spinel. Walking forward quickly, she brushed her nose against Spinel's softly. "Please get some rest Spinel-san… You don't look so well. Farewell to you both." With a wink, she spun about and pranced to the edge before lifting into the air upon her translucent wings.

As the two disappeared, Eriol clung more tightly to Spinel as he bit his lower lip. He was scared. What if everyone didn't want to forgive him for his behavior? Burying his face in the dark silk like fur, he muttered out softly to his friend. "Spinel-san… Forgive me?"

"Of course Eriol-san…" Nuzzling the boy gently, he lowered himself to the ground and allowed Eriol to climb onto his back. As they entered the room, the panther hopped with agility onto the bed and allowed the boy to slide off of his back. "Please get some sleep Eriol-san… You'll have a long day tomorrow if you don't…"

"Thank you… Spinel-san… Stay in here with me? I don't want to be alone anymore…" The cat purred softly in response then curled up beside him to keep him warm. Slipping his hands gently over the mass of dark blue fur, he was delighted to hear the throaty purr that emanated from the animal. In moments, Spinel fell asleep and rested for the first time in weeks. In turn, Eriol closed his eyes and smiled softly. He had missed this, and was glad that he had been proven wrong. The part that made him happiest was knowing that no one he loved would be hurt. Falling into dreamless sleep, he found that no more visions or dreams could keep him from doing what he had to do.

~*~

TBC…