Chapter Nine: Homecoming Welcome or Unwelcome

*Lady Serena! ThereÕs a rider coming up the southern field! He appears to be baring the Blue Crest code of arms!Ó A serf called to her. In her room, Serena sighed. So much had happened since Hiiro had been gone. It would be nice if this person, whom ever it may be, would not cause any more problems. She then picked herself up from her comfortable seat near the window and left her safe room. As she descended the stairs, Rachel joined her.

ÒRachel, you smell wonderful. What were you cooking?Ó Serena smiled at the older woman. Rachel gave a short cackle and winked.

ÒI was baking a pot pie. Meat, vegetables, and a thick gravy. Perfect for a person who eats like you, fast and clean.Ó Both women laughed again. ÒWhere are you headed?Ó

ÒOne of the serfs called to me while I was in my window. Apparently there is a single man riding up our southern fields and coming this way. He is baring our coat of arms, however, I thought I should be prepared to greet a guest, or perhaps deter an enemy. Would you care to join me?Ó Serena sighed deeply.

ÒI believe I will leave the greetings to you my lady. I have much work to do.Ó Rachel too sighed, but for different reasons. She loved her work and did not want to think that another event such as the raid could occur again.

ÒI understand. Good day Rachel, I will see you in a bit.Ó With that, the women separated and Serena left the confines of the house. The rider now was much closer, and Serena could see he was galloping at full speed to get to her. It was unusual. What would such a rider want? As he grew closer, he slowed his horse. Removing his hood from his head, Serena let out a gasp.

ÒHow has my home been?Ó The deep voice echoed in her ears. Hiiro was home.

)(

Hiiro had ridden for three days and nights straight before he decided to rest. In doing so he cut the trip home in half time wise. It had only taken him five days to reach home, not the predicted week and a half. As he had ridden up his southern field his heart had swelled with pride. The crop was growing well, and it looked incredibly healthy. The closer he had gotten to home, the more he wished his horse could go faster.

Soon he could see a small figure standing in front of the citadel and knew in an instant who it must be. His wife, Serenity. She stood out against the dreary backdrop in her deep red dress with blonde hair tumbling down in waves to her waist. He had never seen a more appealing sight in his life. She was a vision lovely enough to banish the dark memories of the dead bodies he had desecrated in France. Then he remembered he was not on good terms with his wife, and kicked himself for making such a mistake. But what could he say to her?

ÒHow has my home been?Ó He asked. She gasped, and he noted that her creamy long arms were more tan than they had been when he had left. That, and the fact that she now sported a white cloth wrap around her right wrist. What had happened? Dismounting, he stood still in front of her, waiting for her answer.

ÒItÕs been interesting to say the least.Ó She answered much in the same tone he had asked his question in. After a few more moments of time freezing them in place, Serena broke her spell and ran towards him. Hiiro embraced her thin frame and held a shocked look within his dark sapphire eyes.

ÒHnn.Ó He grunted.

ÒIÕm sorry.Ó She said, pulling away from his embrace. ÒIÕm sorry, lord Hiiro. ItÕs just, well, wonderful to see you again.Ó Her eyes were lowered, and she appeared to be studying her bare feet.

ÒThatÕs fine.Ó He muttered, uncomfortable with her silence. She was so subdued. Not even a smile .No longer was she as bright and cheerful as he remembered. Something must have occurred to change her so drastically. In fact, all of his fief seemed quieter than normal.

ÒHiiro!Ó Rachel came running out. She flung herself into his arms and hugged her son with all her might.

ÒHello Rachel. How are things?Ó He asked her.

ÒMuch better now that youÕre back. Come in, come in. Rest. Serena, would youÉÓ

ÒOf course.Ó Serena nodded in understanding. She grabbed the horseÕs reins with her good left arm and led it away in the direction of the stables.

ÒCome Hiiro.Ó

ÒBut what ofÉÓ

ÒShe will be fine. When sheÕs done with the horse sheÕll join us. I dare say it wonÕt take her long, seeing as how she canÕt do much anyway. Carl will take the horse from her and do it. Come on.Ó With that, Hiiro allowed her to lead him inside.

Hiiro sat in his chambers restless. He had been home five hours. He had eaten the same home cooked food he remembered, he had greeted the same people he had known all his life, he had surveyed his land and seen that everything was in more than perfect order. And now he was to sleep. Yet he could not. It was apparent that something had occurred while he was gone. His entire staff of serfs were walking on eggshells, including Rachel. And he hadnÕt seen Serena since he had ridden in, though Rachel had said he would. So he decided that since he couldnÕt sleep, he would visit his wife.

Strolling up the stairs, he never skipped a beat when he saw the arrow in the wall. But he did wonder how it had gotten there. And why it hadnÕt been removed as of yet. Finally he reached her door and knocked. The same red headed girl that was always with her answered, and showed herself out without so much as a word to him.

ÒLord Yui. IÕm sorry. I didnÕt hear you come in.Ó Serena stood quickly from her seat when she saw her husband was in the room with her.

ÒI wanted to hear what went on while I was away. Why is everyone so subdued?Ó

ÒWe were fine until around four days ago.Ó Hiiro narrowed his eyes. The same day he left for home was the same day they had had problems. No wonder he had felt uneasy, as though he needed to leave quickly.

ÒWhat happened four days ago?Ó He implored her to continue.

ÒWe were attacked during the night by a band of raiders. To make a long story short, we ultimately won. Three men died, no children, and no women were injured.Ó She told him.

ÒAnd your wrist?Ó His eyes narrowed.

ÒI made a careless error, nothing to worry about.Ó

ÒYou should learn to be more careful. A woman such as yourself should not be so careless as to injure herself as you do.Ó He chided her sternly.

ÒLord Yui, I would like for you to please leave. Now.Ó She said coldly. His eyes widened. Why was she all of a sudden pushing him out? What had he done?

ÒWhy are you so suddenly so insistent upon my leaving?Ó He asked her.

ÒBecause you can do nothing but insult me. And, frankly, I do not feel well enough to argue with you tonight. So please leave.Ó She answered before turning her back to him.

ÒHow have I insulted you?Ó

ÒIt makes no difference. Leave.Ó She commanded again.

ÒNo.Ó For some odd reason, Hiiro didnÕt want to leave. Serena made him feel more comfortable than anyone else. Perhaps it was because she treated him like she treated everyone else, as her equal. Or maybe it was just lust. No, he shook the thought form his head. It didnÕt fit. He craved her speech, her thoughts, not her body. Or, well, not just her body. Well, whatever it was, if he left, he would lose it.

ÒHiiro. I am asking you to leave.Ó She couldnÕt deal with this. She just couldnÕtÉ

ÒHow have I insulted you?Ó He asked one last time. She sighed.

ÒYou have no idea how I hurt my wrist, yet you call me careless.Ó

ÒYou yourself said you were careless!Ó He argued angrily.

ÒYes. But you do not know the full context for the carelessness.Ó

ÒThen tell me.Ó He glared darkly at her. Serena shied away in fear, then stepped up and began to speak.

ÒOn the night of the attack I was in with the women. Benedict wouldnÕt allow me to help outside.Ó He grunted. She glared at him. ÒThree of the raiders broke through the menÕs outside defense and got inside. They reached the central room of the main keep and picked the lock. I used my sword to, well, I killed the first one and injured the second. The third was too strong. He disarmed me, then took me by my wrist and dragged me by it out the door until Carl ran him through. He damaged my wrist when he dragged me. Now that you know, will you please just leave?Ó She whimpered, but tried to sound stiff.

ÒNo. Why did you try to fight off those raiders?Ó

ÒBecause if I hadnÕt people would have died! Better me to die defending them than them to die because of my fear and cowardliness!Ó She cried, shocked he would even have to ask such a question of her.

Hiiro had listened to her story and once again the feeling of guilt ebbed his in his gut. It made sense to him that she wanted to help. Still she was a woman. He had never thought she would be capable of warding off such evils as raiders. He was surprised to find she had told him the truth when she had said she could wield a sword. Still. He didnÕt like the idea of her being near a sword. She seemed too young, to innocent to be allowed. Hell, she was his wife, and from now on, he would forbid her to do so again. Then his mind replayed what had happened last time he had forbid her to do something. And he thought back over everything else he had done to her. He had hurt heron more than one occasion. But now, he needed to cure her pain. Why, he had no idea. But it hurt him to see her so near to tears.

ÒNo?Ó She asked in horror.

ÒNo.Ó He responded calmly. Then he shook his head. Why was he here? Why was he ready to apologize to a mere woman? Because he was tired. Tired of being alone and tired of his life. While he had been away at war he had preformed some horrible acts. He had killed so many, tortured some, burned some alive. He had not been able to sleep without waking in a cold sweat of fear and disgust. The only thing that had kept him sane was her.

One night, instead of dreaming of the bloodbath he had been in, he dreamt of his wifeÕs face. Serena had been there to comfort him that one night. After that, each time he tried to remember her face he failed. But now she was here, in front of him. And the guilt grew.

ÒWhy wonÕt you leave me?Ó She cried out, in obvious distress. He gave her no response. Their eyes met and pierced through each other, desperately seeking what they could not understand. They stood in the quiet of the night for a few precious moments. Only the dying crackle of the fire and the distant sound of rushing water filtered through the air. It was a battle of wills, a battle of mental and emotional strength. Finally Serena dropped her gaze and began to fall to the floor.

Hiiro stepped in closer to her and wrapped his arms around her to support her from sinking to the ground. Serena let out a strangled cry, then closed her eyes and let tears fall in silence. Why he was helping her she had no idea. His arms were stiff, as if he did not know how to relax them for a hug. Then again, he probably didnÕt. But he was still hugging her. So she took full advantage of the warmth and strength he radiated and let him hold her.

Hiiro inhaled deeply, trying to calm his nervous heart. Never before had he been so close to a woman, besides Rachel. But this was different. Rachel was like a mother to him. Serena was, she was, not. Soon he felt her relax into his arms and he sank to the floor with her in his arms. The warm coals of the dead fire still radiated heat, which felt nice compared to the chilly summer air that traveled in though the window.

Hiiro craned his neck to search out the window. All he could see were stars. The evidence of the empty expanse that lay before them. The truth was hidden within the stars, which only seemed to echo hollow words lost through the sands of time.

ÒHiiro?Ó SerenaÕs light, quiet voice resonated in his ears.

ÒThank you. IÕm sorry I lost my temper with you.Ó

Ò ThatÕs fine.Ó He said, trying to sound more collected and cold. The frown on her face told him he had succeeded. She tried to draw away from him, but he held on tightly.

Serena huffed. What was this man about? She didnÕt understand him. No man she had ever met had ever been quite this complex. One minute he was cold and harsh, fighting with her. The next he was teasing, and then he was sweet and understanding. Then he went right back to being cruel, and now he was refusing to let her go. He was an oxymoron in himself. He temper got the better of her, and Serena decided to pester him.

ÒHiiro, let me go.Ó She commanded. She watched his hard gaze falter slightly, then reestablish and harden again. But he let her go. She sat up, but did so slowly. Watching him intently, she gave a slight nod, as if agreeing to something within herself.

Hiiro felt betrayed when she had asked him to let her go. But if she didnÕt like him, he was not going to force anything on her. So instead he renewed his cold appearance and dropped his hold. But when he felt her crawl to his side and lean her head upon his shoulder, his heart melted. He watched as she sighed and closed her eyes.

ÒHow do you change so suddenly?Ó She asked.

ÒHnn.Ó

ÒThat is not an answer, that is a grunt.Ó

ÒI do not change suddenly.Ó Hiiro finally responded. He didnÕt understand what she meant.

ÒYou do. You walked in here calmly, then we fought, then all of a sudden you were almost nice.Ó She explained to him pointedly.

ÒI did not change.Ó He insisted.

ÒVery well. Think what you wish.Ó She submitted sarcastically.

ÒI will.Ó

ÒFine.Ó

ÒFine.Ó

ÒFine.Ó

ÒStop it.Ó

ÒDonÕt order me around.Ó

Ò I can if I wish.Ó

ÒYou may not! I am mine own person. You may try to order me, but I cannot be forced.Ó She countered. Hiiro recognized a stubbornness in her eyes and chin that he had seen before. Then he thought over what she had said.

ÒYouÕve read my copy John Locke.Ó He said pointedly.

ÒI read most of it.Ó She admitted.

ÒWhy not finish it? Did you not agree with his thoughts?Ó

ÒNo! I quite thoroughly agreed. Especially in his theories of social status. King John has power because we, the little people of his government, allow him to.Ó

ÒThen why not finish it?Ó

ÒI was reading it the night of the raid. Rachel asked what it was about.Ó

ÒAnd when you explained it to her she threw it in the fire and called you a heretic and told you that you were a blasphemer for speaking such ideas.Ó

ÒOh. SheÕs done this before?Ó Serena began to laugh. Even Hiiro retained a smirk on his sullen face.

ÒYes. I have stopped explaining what my documents and books read because of it. You would be wise to do the same. Then perhaps you will be able to finish your reading.Ó

ÒYes. I think I have learned my lesson.Ó

ÒGood. Women like yourself have many lessons you must be taught.Ó Hiiro spoke without thinking. Instantly he regretted it. SerenaÕs head shot up from its resting place on his shoulder and whipped around.

ÒWomen like myself? What does that mean?Ó

ÒNothing. Forget I mentioned any such thing.Ó

ÒNo, I will not forget it. As long as you continue to utter such statements as that, you have not grasped one ounce of knowledge from any of your fancy books. Everything you have learned means nothing in the world we live in. Yet you hide behind the knowledge and think that because of it you have the right to insult all otherÕs intellects. Just because I am a woman does not mean I need to be lead around by the hand and told how to do every single thing in my life. I want you to leave this instant. And do not return.Ó She was fuming. How dare he insult her again. And she had thought they were finally getting somewhere. Well. She could see she was wrong in thinking he might have a heart hidden.

ÒVery well then.Ó Hiiro stood. What else could he do? He didnÕt care to upset her any more, and he was so tired he could not think enough to argue with her. He turned and left without so much as another word to her. Serena shook her head, then dressed for bed. She just didnÕt understand Hiiro Yui. Across the citadel in his own bed chamber, Hiiro fell into a deep sleep, dreaming of a wild blonde running through his golden wheat fields. Well, it was more appealing than the usual dreams with the dying soldiers.

)(

The next few days went on much in the same manner. Serena stayed in the house all the day while Hiiro stayed outside in the fields. Every time they united under any circumstance it ended in a fight. The serfs had begun to take bets on who would win each of the fights. Serena, as of the moment, was winning. She had one up on HiiroÕs score of four. And in the middle of it all, Rachel tried to play referee.

She had taken to making sure she was in the room no matter what every time they were together. If one of them began to become too critical of the other, or lost their temper beyond control, she would be there to help calm them down. The monk Benedict was also often present for their fights. He found them amusing and always bet on Hiiro to win. When Hiiro lost, he always made an excuse for the boyÕs loss. The citadel had become more lively again. People were talking and laughing more. The children had gone back to playing happily in the courtyard, and the grieving families of the three dead serfs were getting back into their normal routine again. Everything was going well. Everything until the monk Benedict decided to visit Hiiro one late evening.

ÒMy lord.Ó

ÒBenedict. What do you want?Ó Hiiro scoffed.

ÒMy lord, I wished to bring something to your attention. Your fatherÕs will.Ó

ÒYes, what of it?Ó Hiiro asked the monk tiredly. He rubbed his temples as he waited for BenedictÕs next comments.

ÒMy lord, it appears you have only partially fulfilled the will.Ó HiiroÕs head shot up.

ÒYou have my full attention monk. Speak. What do you mean only half of the will? What was the other half?Ó

ÒYour fatherÕs will clearly states: ÔMy son shall inherit my title, my land, my money, and all personal effects; as long as he has married the daughter of the fief Walden. If he has not married her and produced an heir by the end of the first year, I transfer all of my belongings to the clergyman monk Benedict, including HiiroÕs new wife and her dowry.Õ Are you aware of that?Ó

ÒIÕve read that before. Now tell me what part I have not completed.Ó Hiiro answered.

ÒYou need and heir. By the end of this year. And, as far as I can see, no woman can produce a child when she sleeps an entire courtyard away from her husband.Ó Benedict sneered. This was good for him because of Hiiro failed to impregnate Serena by the end of the year, which, at the rate the two were moving, was inevitable, not only did he get the land and the money, but Serena as well. The perfect plot.

ÒBenedict! You over step your bounds. Leave this room now.Ó

ÒAs you wish my Lord.Ó Benedict mock bowed his head and then left the room. Hiiro sat in his chair and sighed. Not good. Well, there was only one thing to do. He stood and walking quickly, he climbed the stairs to the blue room. Finding Molly asleep in front of it, he slipped past her and into the room.

Moving over towards the bed, he was surprised to find it empty. Where had SerenaÉ a movement caught his eye. Next to the window sat Serena, heavy blue cloak pulled up around her to keep her warm. Her head had fallen onto the page of the book she had been reading. Hiiro thought to wake her, but he did not. For some reason, he could not do what he had come so eagerly to finish in the first place. Picking her up, he placed her gently on her bed. Then he dimmed the candles and left, closing the door behind him.

Well. He was a coward. If he had been a true man he would have just gone in there, woken her up, and had his way with her. Then she would have become pregnant and his problems would be solved. But he couldnÕt do that to her. So he was less than a perfect man. Maybe Rachel would have a better idea on how to fix this problem. Maybe? He was desperate for her toÉ*