In the last episode, The mob club advances towards Anna & Nina. This couldn't be good for the sisters, but its brilliant for Heihachi. Its been recently pointed out to me that Trunks & Gotenks are indeed present at the same time (isn't possible). So as to cover up for my slack, I'll just say that Gotenks split up some time unbeknownst to you all & I'm the writer, so what I say goes. NEH!
Everyone: MOB CLUB! MOB CLUB! MOB CLUB!!
Gohan: Hey everyone, this sign says no Mob Clubs beyond this point.
Armor King: AH! CRAP!! Nothing good ever happens to me!!
Jun: We can all read by the way.
Bruce: Well, actually, some of us Americans can't read Japanese you know.
Bryan: Nope. Just you. I can.
Paul: College major for me.
Law: What he said.
Michelle: We can. And we're half Chinese.
Julia: Yeah you ignorant bastard!
Bruce: (cries at his narrow minded ways)
Vegeta: Move over losers!
Vegeta final flashes sign with unnecessary brutality.
Vegeta: What sign?
Goku: You can't just go around breaking rules. Why if everyone did that*
Vegeta: Shut up Kakarot.
Mob club continues to march until they get to the Tower.
Trunks: There's only one lift people. & the maximum is 250KG
Ganryu: Oh well. I'll have to stay down here *sob, sniff*
Michelle/Julia: (quietly) Yes!
King: My super Jaguar like senses heard that too*
Armor King: So what!? Mine did too. You don't see me making a big fiesta about it.
Trunks: 250kg, that's not very much. I thought you people would be able to afford
better elevators.
Jin: Well you see the thing is (turns around & pencil scratching can be heard).
Gohan: Ignore him everyone. (gets out calculator) I'll need to know everyone's
weight.
All women : (Laugh nervously)
Gohan: Jun?
Jun: 49 kg
Someone: *coughbollockscough*
Jun: Ok, its 54 kg
Gohan: Michelle?
Michelle: 53 kg
Jun: Um...Actually, mines 52 kg.
Michelle: Well then I'm 50 kg
Gohan: You know what? You two can go last. Julia?
Julia: Save yourselves the trouble & just whisper. (whispers weight to Gohan)
King/Armor King: *laugh hysterically*
King: Someone needs to lay off the cheese burritos.
Armor King: Good one! High five!
Yoshimitsu: Well no one knows my weight. Cause I'm shrouded in mystery.
HAHAHAHA!
Goten: Just tell us!
Yoshimitsu: I can't. It's mysterious.
Trunks: You don't know, do you!?
Yoshimitsu: (hangs head) No sir. The last time I got on a pair of scales was a long
time ago.
Many hours of hassle later
Gohan: OK HE'S 63 GODDAM KGs! FINALLY. You can get in the lift with Baek,
Bryan & King.
Yoshimitsu: That's OK. I can fly.
Gohan: (grits teeth very loudly. Then speaks slowly) Before I kill Yoshimitsu, who
else can fly apart from my family & Yoshi?
Vegeta: Me!
Gohan: I said apart from my family!
Vegeta: I'm not your family.
Gohan: You know what I mean.
Vegeta: I know. I'm just being immature & annoying. Besides just cause your
saiya-jin, doesn't make us related.
Gohan: Well I can go to your daughter & do something about that!
Goku: Gohan!
Gohan: Sorry. I'm just really stressed right now.
Trunks: I'll take over calculations.
Gohan: Thanks (sits in corner & breaks down nervously).
Trunks: So as he was saying, who else can fly?
Jin: I can fly when I'm devil Jin.
Trunks: Weellllll, are you devil Jin right now?
Jin: No.
Trunks: THEN SHUT UP!!!
Kunimitsu: I can teleport.
Trunks: Ok, go into the lifts in these groups.
Goku: Flyers follow me.
At the top.
Nina: What's that gold stuff in the bowl?
Heihachi: Oo that. That be Ambrosia lass.
Nina: Ambrosia!!
Anna: You mean the mythical & legendary food of the Gods that if eaten by mortals
turns them into Gods.
Heihachi: Well if ye be wannti' te be technical.
Nina: How did you get it old man?
Heihachi: Well this friend of mine, Lara she be called. She likes to raid them tombs &
pinch things. She sent me `em this Christmas.
Anna: Why haven't you taken any?!!
Heihachi: T'is gold. That means its pineapple flavour. Eeck!!
Anna: So what? You could of become a God & ruled the world by now.
Heihachi: Hello! What don't ye understand ye plank. Its pineapple. Ye know,
pineapple....
PINEAPPLE: A fibrous type fruit grown on stalks native te Endonesia. Also
tastes like bog bombs.
Nina: You mean Indonesia.
Heihachi: Whitever.
Anna: Shall we take some. I don't trust him.
Nina: Aye. I know.
Z Squad & Yoshi burst in.
Goku: Give it up Cell ..er.. I mean.....Hey Yoshi what's their names.
Yoshimitsu: Anna & Nina.
Goku: Yeah ok....um, Anna & Nina.
Vegeta: Yeah. We even have back up coming. (points to lift dial)
Lift dial goes to `2^nd'. A minute later to `3^rd'. & so on
Gohan: Wow. That's slow
Back in lift
Lei: You idiot! Now we're gonna stop on every floor!!
Hwoarang: Sorry. I thought you were meant to push all the buttons.
At the top
Anna: I think we should take the ambrosia now.
Nina: Agreed! (both dive for bowl & take a piece then throw bowl out of the window so no one else can have any)
Anna: Ha! Were goddesses now.
Sure enough both of them have the super saiya-jin style glow & glowing eyes.
Trunks: Oh man! Unreal!!
Goten: You always say that!
Trunks: I know.
Elevator: *Ping* *door slides*
Lei: It's the right floor everyone.
Fire exit bursts open & everyone else bursts through but are panting like hell.
Law: I'm fine because I've got Bruce Lee stamina.
Bryan: Why didn't you wait for the lift?
Law: Too long. Who pressed all the buttons?
Lei: It was Hwoarang.
Eddy: Ya Man! In yo face. Pay up!
Armor King: Damn! (hands over $5)
Paul: Hey look, they're gods now.
Anna: Oh good eye Phoenix, did ye just notice now?
Kazuya: I don't care, cause I'm convinced I'm hard. & your not. I'll take you
Both on.(charges)
Lee: Better help him out Jin.
Jin: Better do. (Both charge)
Two seconds later, Anna & Nina Have immobilized Jin & Kazuya
Lee: Hehehe. It's a good thing I was at the back.
Everyone: *Stares at Lee with contempt for his cowardice*
Lee: What?
Jin: That hurt.
Kazuya: Sure did.
Anna: How shall we kill them.
Heihachi: Don't throw them from a high distance, that will'ne do jack. Believe me, I
know.
Nina: Out the window?
Anna: Why not. (does so)
Jun: Thanks a lot dad!
Horrible splat heard from outside the window
Heihachi: Keep yer kilt on. Look.
Elevator going up from ground to top.
Elevator: *ping* (Kazuya & Jin emerge unscathed)
Everyone: *loud cheers & whistles*
Hwoarang: (holds up score card of 10)
Xiaoyu: (holds up score card of 10)
Julia: (holds up score card of 10)
Jun: (holds up score card of 10)
Eddy: (holds up score card of 9.5)
Everyone: BOOO!!
Eddy: (turns card round to 10)
Everyone: *Cheers wildly*
Lee: (goes up & gives Kazuya & Jin gold medals. Japanese national anthem is played)
Anna: Enough! All of you!!
Nina: We've defeated two of the strongest Tekken characters so you have no chance.
Goku: Wrong!
Vegeta: We're not Tekken characters. I can kill you both with one final flash.
Anna: Fine. I'll stand here & you can try.
Vegeta: *laughs like the arrogant bastard he is*
Goku: EVERYONE GET OUT!!!
Vegeta starts charging up making unnecessary grunting noises to emphasize effort. Meanwhile everyone piles down the stairs except Jin & Kazuya who jump out the window. Everyone has tripped over each other & are now piled at the bottom of the stairs.
Kunimitsu: (from somewhere in the pile) Someone's got their hand where it shouldn't
be...Unless its Jin, Hwoarang or Lee. Then I don't care.
Hwoarang: Damn! Missed!
Ganryu: HEY! DOG PILE!!
Paul: Uh oh.
Michelle: GANRYU, NO!!
Ganryu: WHHHEEEEEEE!!
Meanwhile upstairs
Vegeta: (already charging up) This is gonna hurt you. But I bet you'll just move out
the way. Hahaha!
Anna: *just stands with folded arms, smiling*
Screams of anguish can be heard from downstairs
Vegeta : (Still charging, looks down stairwell in wonder)
Back downstairs
Ganryu: That was fun (gets up to reveal Baek)
Baek: The horror.........THE HORROR.
Jin: You would have been safer jumping out the window with us.
Goku: Lets all get out of here (they do so)
When they've gotten quite far away, they see a large explosion.
Heihachi: My building!!
Goku: Lets all see what happened. (they do so)
The building has collapsed & Vegeta has one knee & fist kneeled into the floor. Anna lays unconscious 100m away.
Trunks: Whoa! He ko'd her.
Vegeta: (is out of breath but still laughs)
Goku: hey. Lets all celebrate. That's obviously not the end of it, but lets stand here &
reminisce about it & crack lame jokes only to be shocked at the fact that she's
not really dead & there still her sister to go.
Anna: (gets up slowly)Your pretty strong (wipes blood from mouth) For a mortal.
An infuriated Vegeta lunges at Anna but she catches his punch & throws him into a building, collapsing it.
Heihachi: NOOO!
Goten: STOP! You know what we always do! We can't fight here. We'll just destroy
the place. We got to find some place that's desolate & hasn't got any people
& doesn't exist in real life & is a gazillion miles wide & isn't to be found
anywhere on earth., but its right over there (points).
Everyone: *Looks* (and sure enough, it is)
Vegeta: (flies over to desolate landscape while everyone follows) Lets fight!
Anna: I need to pee.
Vegeta: (sighs) Go ahead then. (He turns round. Looks at his nails but realizes he's wearing gloves. He then ties his shoe lace but soon notices he doesn't have any)
*flush*
Anna: (emerges from toilets) Ready.
Vegeta: I need to go now.
Anna; That's a women's toilet.
Vegeta: Oh, I see....
Anna: What you turn around for?
Vegeta: (shrugs) I didn't know that toilet was there before.
Anna: I'm a Goddess remember?
Paul: Are you gonna fight or not!
Goku: Hey you don't have to fight. I got an idea (gets out wallet)
Anna: Are you going to bribe me!?
Goku: Hell no! I'm not employed & I don't have any money but for some
inexplicable reason, my family lives in quite moderate surroundings.
Vegeta: I just sponge of my loaded (& lovely) wife who owns the Capsule Corp. Her
Name's Bulma.
Lee: HAHAHA! That means bloomers.
Anna: Well if you're not bribing me, what are you doing then?
Goku: Here they are. Gohan's baby pics. (Shows them to Anna) Huh? Doesn't that
want to make you relinquish your evil ways? Huh!? C'mon, relinquish. You
can't resist his tiny widdy cuteness. They appeal to your maternal instincts.
Anna: (stern face melts into maternal smile) Nina, I quit. You can keep the box. See
ya later girlfriend. (teleports away to some godly place)
Goku: Why didn't I think of that!? I can teleport too you know.
Nina: Well now I'll never give you the time necessary to gather everyone into a big
group & for you to charge up for mass teleportation.
Goku: I won't need to because you're about to see....GOHAN'S BABY PICS. (sticks them in her face)
Nina: *Blank expression*
Goku: Ha! Feel your maternal instincts get the better of you. The cuteness. THE
IDDY WIDDY CUTENESS!
Nina: *yawn*
Goku: Oh shit! Um...(messes in wallet).. ah ha! GOTEN'S BABY PICS!! Notice the
Resemblance to me?
Nina: *silence*
Goku: Well how bout my baby pics! (shows them)
Nina: (cracks knuckles)
Goku: C'mon! it's a naked baby!!! Oh shit! Psst. Vegeta, gimme your baby pics.
Vegeta: Lets just merge & then fight her, dumb-ass.
Trunks: How come no one asked for my baby pics!? I was cute! Dad, wasn't I cute
when I was a baby.
Vegeta: Of course you weren't.
Trunks:!!!
Vegeta: Uh...I mean of course you weren't...I mean , I don't know because I
neglected you! (slaps forehead)
Gohan: Goten. Did you wish that just for one day, Vegeta couldn't tell a lie?
Goten: What the hell are you talking about!?
Gohan: Just checking.
Nina: Quit showing me pictures & just fight.
Goku: I can't hit a girl. Its just not me. Its like Christina Aguilera singing in Spanish.
(puts wallet back but a picture falls out)
Vegeta: (Picks it up) Nice.
Trunks: Lemme see. (looks)... Oooo!
Goku: Hey! Give that back.
Gohan: I want to see! (snatches picture & looks).... Aw god that's awful.
Goten: Really? Give it here.
Gohan: No! it's mom.
Goku: (snatches picture back & blushes) Thanks for that Vegeta.
Nina, having grown impatient, lunges at Goku & punches him right in the face, knocking him down.
Goku: That wasn't very ladylike.
Nina: No shit Einstein!
Kazuya: Don't put up with that crap. Hit her!
Goku: I can't... cause... um...I've been.... defeated! Yeah that's it. Son, you'll have
to fight her.
Gohan: Hey! You've done this to me before.
Trunks: DING DING DING! That is correct. What does Gohan win today!?
Goten: Well Gohan wins the right to fight Nina, complete with medical expenses!
Back to you Trunks!
Gohan: Ah, shut up `fore I bust yo ass wit a 9-iron'. (steps up to Nina)
Vegeta: Hey You! Kazuya Mishima isn't it?
Kazuya: That's right.
Vegeta: Well I've noticed that you think you're quite hard.
Kazuya: What, you mean like you?
Vegeta: Well... yes. Also your arrogant, cocky, overbearing & proud...just like me.
We also both got suave hair.
Kazuya: So what! Do you want to be my best bud now!?
Lee: Sorry pal, positions taken! (puts arm round Kazuya)
Kazuya: Get your hand off me.
Lee: (retracts hand) Sorry.
Vegeta: Ha! Don't flatter yourself. I don't need any friends! (looks back to fight)
Gohan: C'mon, just give it up. I don't care if you're evil. I mean you're not bad....
just in love. Tell me, what's the worst thing you've done?
Nina: Do you really want to know.
Gohan: Sure.
Nina: Ok. While shopping one time, I took 11 items into the 10 items or less line.
Everyone: *gasp* *horror*
Gohan: (Clenches his fist) That's evil....but it can be forgiven.
Nina: Can it now? You don't sound too sure about that. Besides it doesn't end
there.....I paid in dimes.
Gohan: No! Stop!
Nina: Then I put all the stuff into un-recycled bags before loading them into my car
parked in the disabled section.
Gohan: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! (turns super saiya-jin 4) YOU'LL
PAY!!!!
Trunks: Oh man! Unreal!
Vegeta: Goddam shut up with that!
Nina: And to top it all off....I didn't put my cart away.
Gohan: BITCH!! I'LL KILL YOU!!!!!! (lunges towards Nina)
Nina & Gohan trade punches & kick for a while in the air, occasionally knocking each other into rocks & demolishing them in typical dragonball fashion.
Goku: Gohan is being sloppy. I bet you 5 bucks that we have to mop this up after.
Vegeta: I can't believe you'd bet against your own son.
Goku: You do it all the time.
Vegeta: Well I'm ace so I'm allowed. But I'll take your bet. Gohan will win.
Goku: So anyway...Say, do you think we could go super saiya-jin 5?
Vegeta: (shrugs) Maybe. I'd sure Like to.
Goku: That'd be cool.
Vegeta: You Know what.
Goku: What?
Vegeta: I'm Glad all those earth guys& Piccolo aren't here. I mean all they do is let us
fight because most of the time they don't even stand a chance. They always
come along to our adventures, all dressed up & stuff & they don't do anything
but comment on how good we are when we're winning & say how
were all doomed when we're losing.
Goku: Don't be so nasty. They helped in the cell saga when Gohan was losing that tug
of war with his kamehame. They all shot cell in the back.
Vegeta: Don't make such stupid comments. Cell was hardly bothered by those blasts.
It was my one that disturbed him long enough for Gohan to take advantage.
Goku: Yeah! & then I shouted, ` NOW'S YOUR CHANCE'
Vegeta: Yeah! Yeah! & all that heroic music.....
Goku: ...Then cell disintegrated.
Goku/Vegeta: *laugh hysterically*
Vegeta: Shouldn't we be watching the fight?
Goku: Oh yeah!
They look & see SSJ 4 Gohan & Nina both standing out of breath with tattered clothes & bleeding profusely. Conveniently, While Gohan has no top left, Nina has shards just in the right places to cover up.
Gohan: You're very strong. *huff puff*
Nina: *Huff* So are you. You're also very fast. *puff*
Gohan: *Huff* So are you. You're also very skilled. *puff*
Nina: I know. But you're not
Gohan: Oh I see. We're being honest.
Goku: Gohan! Enough of that crap. Do something drastic at the end that will just
scrape us the win.
Trunks: I'm tired of using that strategy. Don't we have any others?
Goku: *pssst* Vegeta, I really think you should stop hitting him so hard during
Sparring sessions.
Vegeta: Nonsense! (Smacks Trunks round the head).
Trunks: Thanks. I don't know what came over me.
Just then, Gohan comes crashing down a meter in front of them making a huge but not so huge crater.
Michelle: Just think Lee. If you even just dated Nina for a bit, you'd of saved Gohan
all that beating.
Lee's imagination of a date with Nina in a restaurant called Assassin Joint.
Nina:...& I killed him because he didn't ask me out for a second date.
Lee: *laughs nervously*
Nina: Yes that was amusing. Cheque please!
Waiter: Here you go ma'am.
Nina: Hey, this is the wrong cheque! (throws knife into waiters head)
Back in the real world
Kazuya: Well it wouldn't of stopped there. She would of made you marry her.
Lee's imagination at wedding
Kazuya: Congratulations, Lee! Have a....nice... honey moon. (wink & elbow in ribs)
Lee: *blushes*
Nina: Ok girls, get ready to catch the bouquet. (throws flowers)
Anna: (Catches flowers) oh my...
Nina: You! (throws knife into Anna's head)
Back in the real world
Heihachi: & then you'll give me grand children, who I would take in many helicopter
rides & cliff tours.
Lee's imagination again (he's nuts). This time in hospital maternity ward
Nina: Oh isn't she cute. Look Lee. That's your daughter.
Lee: I should hope so. Anyhow, what will we call her?
Doctor: How about Anna?
Baby: (Throws knife into doctors head)
Back in the real world
Jin: It would be so nice to have a new face in the family
Lee's imagination at his house where Kazuya has visited
Kazuya: Hello Charlotte Williams Mishima Chaolan, my niece from only brother Lee.
Is your daddy home?
Charlotte: Yes uncle Kazuya.
Kazuya: I got you a Malibu Barbie for your fifth birthday.
Charlotte: What! I wanted Ballet Barbie. (Throws Knife at Kazuya)
Kazuya:(Coolly catches knife without effort in between middle & fore-finger)
*yawn* Now Charlotte, you shouldn't play with assassin daggers.
Real world
Lee: Damn! There's aren't even any advantages! Oh well, for Gohan's sake, I'll have
to ask Nina out on a date & stop this.
King: Too late Romeo. Fights over.
Lee: What! Who won.
Xiaoyu: Gohan...*sigh*...He's so dreamy.
Lee: (looks & sees Gohan surrounded by all the women.) How'd he win!?
Lei: It was quite simple actually. You see his tail was*
King: HEY EVERYONE! BEACH PARTY!!
Everyone: runs to beach party.
Lee: But....but... my explanation.... Ah nuts. (turns around & is about to follow everyone but sees Nina. Out of kindness, he walks over)
Nina: *cry, sniff, sob*
Lee: Hey.
Nina: *sniff* Hi.
Lee: Listen...uh...well. This is going to sound really stupid but...Do you use
throwing knives?
Nina: No way! That's Anna's speciality. ....Did you really mean what you said about
only liking Japanese girls?
Lee: Heck no. I'm a really very open minded kinda guy.
Nina: (smiles at Lee)
Lee: (smiles back & sticks out hand to help Nina up)
Someone in audience: Getta room!!
Someone else in audience: Down in front!!
Lee: C'mon lets go to that beach party. (They do so.... Holding hands may I add. Course I may. I'm the author dammit!)
At the beach party they stand at the doorway & see a wild party going on. Trunks is loading the capsule with fuel while playing with a lighter. Goten is juggling the dragonballs. Yoshi is carving the boar on a spit. Vegeta, Paul, Jin, Heihachi & Kazuya argue over who's got the funkiest hair. Gohan is still surrounded by women. Law, Eddy & Hwoarang play some tunes. Armor King & King are getting too drunk for anyone's good. Goku is eating a comically large amount of food. Much more than people would normally eat. But for comedy's sake he eats it all up at a ridiculously fast rate.
Lee: C'mon lets join in.
Nina: No. They all hate me!
Lei: HEY EVERYONE ITS NINA & LEE!
Everyone: HI NINA & LEE!
Nina: I thought you'd all hate me.
Goku; No way! My forgiving & naïve ways are contagious to everyone!
Vegeta: Yeah! Even me. (kicks ground) I use to be such a bad
mutha...mumble...mumble.
Next day. The dragonball characters are ready to go back to their own planet.
Goku: Ok guys, are we all buckled in?
Gohan: Yup.
Vegeta: Have you got those dragonballs?
Goten: Yup.
Trunks: Take off in 5...4...3...2...1
Outside everyone sees the rocket take off.
Baek: I'll never forget those guys.
Lei: I won't forget them neither.
Baek: Forget who?
Lei: (Shrugs)
Baek: C'mon Hwoarang. Lets get back to Korea.
Paul: Yeah! C'mon guys. Flight to the US takes off in an hour.
All Americans & Mexicans: WE KNOW!!
Jin: How will us Japanese get back home!?
Kazuya: Oh no! (hugs Jin in fear)
Yoshimitsu: We're already in Japan idiots.
Jin: (pushes Kazuya off) I knew that.
Back in space
Vegeta: Hey! I never proved I could destroy that planet with 1 final flash........
THE END
Everyone: MOB CLUB! MOB CLUB! MOB CLUB!!
Gohan: Hey everyone, this sign says no Mob Clubs beyond this point.
Armor King: AH! CRAP!! Nothing good ever happens to me!!
Jun: We can all read by the way.
Bruce: Well, actually, some of us Americans can't read Japanese you know.
Bryan: Nope. Just you. I can.
Paul: College major for me.
Law: What he said.
Michelle: We can. And we're half Chinese.
Julia: Yeah you ignorant bastard!
Bruce: (cries at his narrow minded ways)
Vegeta: Move over losers!
Vegeta final flashes sign with unnecessary brutality.
Vegeta: What sign?
Goku: You can't just go around breaking rules. Why if everyone did that*
Vegeta: Shut up Kakarot.
Mob club continues to march until they get to the Tower.
Trunks: There's only one lift people. & the maximum is 250KG
Ganryu: Oh well. I'll have to stay down here *sob, sniff*
Michelle/Julia: (quietly) Yes!
King: My super Jaguar like senses heard that too*
Armor King: So what!? Mine did too. You don't see me making a big fiesta about it.
Trunks: 250kg, that's not very much. I thought you people would be able to afford
better elevators.
Jin: Well you see the thing is (turns around & pencil scratching can be heard).
Gohan: Ignore him everyone. (gets out calculator) I'll need to know everyone's
weight.
All women : (Laugh nervously)
Gohan: Jun?
Jun: 49 kg
Someone: *coughbollockscough*
Jun: Ok, its 54 kg
Gohan: Michelle?
Michelle: 53 kg
Jun: Um...Actually, mines 52 kg.
Michelle: Well then I'm 50 kg
Gohan: You know what? You two can go last. Julia?
Julia: Save yourselves the trouble & just whisper. (whispers weight to Gohan)
King/Armor King: *laugh hysterically*
King: Someone needs to lay off the cheese burritos.
Armor King: Good one! High five!
Yoshimitsu: Well no one knows my weight. Cause I'm shrouded in mystery.
HAHAHAHA!
Goten: Just tell us!
Yoshimitsu: I can't. It's mysterious.
Trunks: You don't know, do you!?
Yoshimitsu: (hangs head) No sir. The last time I got on a pair of scales was a long
time ago.
Many hours of hassle later
Gohan: OK HE'S 63 GODDAM KGs! FINALLY. You can get in the lift with Baek,
Bryan & King.
Yoshimitsu: That's OK. I can fly.
Gohan: (grits teeth very loudly. Then speaks slowly) Before I kill Yoshimitsu, who
else can fly apart from my family & Yoshi?
Vegeta: Me!
Gohan: I said apart from my family!
Vegeta: I'm not your family.
Gohan: You know what I mean.
Vegeta: I know. I'm just being immature & annoying. Besides just cause your
saiya-jin, doesn't make us related.
Gohan: Well I can go to your daughter & do something about that!
Goku: Gohan!
Gohan: Sorry. I'm just really stressed right now.
Trunks: I'll take over calculations.
Gohan: Thanks (sits in corner & breaks down nervously).
Trunks: So as he was saying, who else can fly?
Jin: I can fly when I'm devil Jin.
Trunks: Weellllll, are you devil Jin right now?
Jin: No.
Trunks: THEN SHUT UP!!!
Kunimitsu: I can teleport.
Trunks: Ok, go into the lifts in these groups.
Goku: Flyers follow me.
At the top.
Nina: What's that gold stuff in the bowl?
Heihachi: Oo that. That be Ambrosia lass.
Nina: Ambrosia!!
Anna: You mean the mythical & legendary food of the Gods that if eaten by mortals
turns them into Gods.
Heihachi: Well if ye be wannti' te be technical.
Nina: How did you get it old man?
Heihachi: Well this friend of mine, Lara she be called. She likes to raid them tombs &
pinch things. She sent me `em this Christmas.
Anna: Why haven't you taken any?!!
Heihachi: T'is gold. That means its pineapple flavour. Eeck!!
Anna: So what? You could of become a God & ruled the world by now.
Heihachi: Hello! What don't ye understand ye plank. Its pineapple. Ye know,
pineapple....
PINEAPPLE: A fibrous type fruit grown on stalks native te Endonesia. Also
tastes like bog bombs.
Nina: You mean Indonesia.
Heihachi: Whitever.
Anna: Shall we take some. I don't trust him.
Nina: Aye. I know.
Z Squad & Yoshi burst in.
Goku: Give it up Cell ..er.. I mean.....Hey Yoshi what's their names.
Yoshimitsu: Anna & Nina.
Goku: Yeah ok....um, Anna & Nina.
Vegeta: Yeah. We even have back up coming. (points to lift dial)
Lift dial goes to `2^nd'. A minute later to `3^rd'. & so on
Gohan: Wow. That's slow
Back in lift
Lei: You idiot! Now we're gonna stop on every floor!!
Hwoarang: Sorry. I thought you were meant to push all the buttons.
At the top
Anna: I think we should take the ambrosia now.
Nina: Agreed! (both dive for bowl & take a piece then throw bowl out of the window so no one else can have any)
Anna: Ha! Were goddesses now.
Sure enough both of them have the super saiya-jin style glow & glowing eyes.
Trunks: Oh man! Unreal!!
Goten: You always say that!
Trunks: I know.
Elevator: *Ping* *door slides*
Lei: It's the right floor everyone.
Fire exit bursts open & everyone else bursts through but are panting like hell.
Law: I'm fine because I've got Bruce Lee stamina.
Bryan: Why didn't you wait for the lift?
Law: Too long. Who pressed all the buttons?
Lei: It was Hwoarang.
Eddy: Ya Man! In yo face. Pay up!
Armor King: Damn! (hands over $5)
Paul: Hey look, they're gods now.
Anna: Oh good eye Phoenix, did ye just notice now?
Kazuya: I don't care, cause I'm convinced I'm hard. & your not. I'll take you
Both on.(charges)
Lee: Better help him out Jin.
Jin: Better do. (Both charge)
Two seconds later, Anna & Nina Have immobilized Jin & Kazuya
Lee: Hehehe. It's a good thing I was at the back.
Everyone: *Stares at Lee with contempt for his cowardice*
Lee: What?
Jin: That hurt.
Kazuya: Sure did.
Anna: How shall we kill them.
Heihachi: Don't throw them from a high distance, that will'ne do jack. Believe me, I
know.
Nina: Out the window?
Anna: Why not. (does so)
Jun: Thanks a lot dad!
Horrible splat heard from outside the window
Heihachi: Keep yer kilt on. Look.
Elevator going up from ground to top.
Elevator: *ping* (Kazuya & Jin emerge unscathed)
Everyone: *loud cheers & whistles*
Hwoarang: (holds up score card of 10)
Xiaoyu: (holds up score card of 10)
Julia: (holds up score card of 10)
Jun: (holds up score card of 10)
Eddy: (holds up score card of 9.5)
Everyone: BOOO!!
Eddy: (turns card round to 10)
Everyone: *Cheers wildly*
Lee: (goes up & gives Kazuya & Jin gold medals. Japanese national anthem is played)
Anna: Enough! All of you!!
Nina: We've defeated two of the strongest Tekken characters so you have no chance.
Goku: Wrong!
Vegeta: We're not Tekken characters. I can kill you both with one final flash.
Anna: Fine. I'll stand here & you can try.
Vegeta: *laughs like the arrogant bastard he is*
Goku: EVERYONE GET OUT!!!
Vegeta starts charging up making unnecessary grunting noises to emphasize effort. Meanwhile everyone piles down the stairs except Jin & Kazuya who jump out the window. Everyone has tripped over each other & are now piled at the bottom of the stairs.
Kunimitsu: (from somewhere in the pile) Someone's got their hand where it shouldn't
be...Unless its Jin, Hwoarang or Lee. Then I don't care.
Hwoarang: Damn! Missed!
Ganryu: HEY! DOG PILE!!
Paul: Uh oh.
Michelle: GANRYU, NO!!
Ganryu: WHHHEEEEEEE!!
Meanwhile upstairs
Vegeta: (already charging up) This is gonna hurt you. But I bet you'll just move out
the way. Hahaha!
Anna: *just stands with folded arms, smiling*
Screams of anguish can be heard from downstairs
Vegeta : (Still charging, looks down stairwell in wonder)
Back downstairs
Ganryu: That was fun (gets up to reveal Baek)
Baek: The horror.........THE HORROR.
Jin: You would have been safer jumping out the window with us.
Goku: Lets all get out of here (they do so)
When they've gotten quite far away, they see a large explosion.
Heihachi: My building!!
Goku: Lets all see what happened. (they do so)
The building has collapsed & Vegeta has one knee & fist kneeled into the floor. Anna lays unconscious 100m away.
Trunks: Whoa! He ko'd her.
Vegeta: (is out of breath but still laughs)
Goku: hey. Lets all celebrate. That's obviously not the end of it, but lets stand here &
reminisce about it & crack lame jokes only to be shocked at the fact that she's
not really dead & there still her sister to go.
Anna: (gets up slowly)Your pretty strong (wipes blood from mouth) For a mortal.
An infuriated Vegeta lunges at Anna but she catches his punch & throws him into a building, collapsing it.
Heihachi: NOOO!
Goten: STOP! You know what we always do! We can't fight here. We'll just destroy
the place. We got to find some place that's desolate & hasn't got any people
& doesn't exist in real life & is a gazillion miles wide & isn't to be found
anywhere on earth., but its right over there (points).
Everyone: *Looks* (and sure enough, it is)
Vegeta: (flies over to desolate landscape while everyone follows) Lets fight!
Anna: I need to pee.
Vegeta: (sighs) Go ahead then. (He turns round. Looks at his nails but realizes he's wearing gloves. He then ties his shoe lace but soon notices he doesn't have any)
*flush*
Anna: (emerges from toilets) Ready.
Vegeta: I need to go now.
Anna; That's a women's toilet.
Vegeta: Oh, I see....
Anna: What you turn around for?
Vegeta: (shrugs) I didn't know that toilet was there before.
Anna: I'm a Goddess remember?
Paul: Are you gonna fight or not!
Goku: Hey you don't have to fight. I got an idea (gets out wallet)
Anna: Are you going to bribe me!?
Goku: Hell no! I'm not employed & I don't have any money but for some
inexplicable reason, my family lives in quite moderate surroundings.
Vegeta: I just sponge of my loaded (& lovely) wife who owns the Capsule Corp. Her
Name's Bulma.
Lee: HAHAHA! That means bloomers.
Anna: Well if you're not bribing me, what are you doing then?
Goku: Here they are. Gohan's baby pics. (Shows them to Anna) Huh? Doesn't that
want to make you relinquish your evil ways? Huh!? C'mon, relinquish. You
can't resist his tiny widdy cuteness. They appeal to your maternal instincts.
Anna: (stern face melts into maternal smile) Nina, I quit. You can keep the box. See
ya later girlfriend. (teleports away to some godly place)
Goku: Why didn't I think of that!? I can teleport too you know.
Nina: Well now I'll never give you the time necessary to gather everyone into a big
group & for you to charge up for mass teleportation.
Goku: I won't need to because you're about to see....GOHAN'S BABY PICS. (sticks them in her face)
Nina: *Blank expression*
Goku: Ha! Feel your maternal instincts get the better of you. The cuteness. THE
IDDY WIDDY CUTENESS!
Nina: *yawn*
Goku: Oh shit! Um...(messes in wallet).. ah ha! GOTEN'S BABY PICS!! Notice the
Resemblance to me?
Nina: *silence*
Goku: Well how bout my baby pics! (shows them)
Nina: (cracks knuckles)
Goku: C'mon! it's a naked baby!!! Oh shit! Psst. Vegeta, gimme your baby pics.
Vegeta: Lets just merge & then fight her, dumb-ass.
Trunks: How come no one asked for my baby pics!? I was cute! Dad, wasn't I cute
when I was a baby.
Vegeta: Of course you weren't.
Trunks:!!!
Vegeta: Uh...I mean of course you weren't...I mean , I don't know because I
neglected you! (slaps forehead)
Gohan: Goten. Did you wish that just for one day, Vegeta couldn't tell a lie?
Goten: What the hell are you talking about!?
Gohan: Just checking.
Nina: Quit showing me pictures & just fight.
Goku: I can't hit a girl. Its just not me. Its like Christina Aguilera singing in Spanish.
(puts wallet back but a picture falls out)
Vegeta: (Picks it up) Nice.
Trunks: Lemme see. (looks)... Oooo!
Goku: Hey! Give that back.
Gohan: I want to see! (snatches picture & looks).... Aw god that's awful.
Goten: Really? Give it here.
Gohan: No! it's mom.
Goku: (snatches picture back & blushes) Thanks for that Vegeta.
Nina, having grown impatient, lunges at Goku & punches him right in the face, knocking him down.
Goku: That wasn't very ladylike.
Nina: No shit Einstein!
Kazuya: Don't put up with that crap. Hit her!
Goku: I can't... cause... um...I've been.... defeated! Yeah that's it. Son, you'll have
to fight her.
Gohan: Hey! You've done this to me before.
Trunks: DING DING DING! That is correct. What does Gohan win today!?
Goten: Well Gohan wins the right to fight Nina, complete with medical expenses!
Back to you Trunks!
Gohan: Ah, shut up `fore I bust yo ass wit a 9-iron'. (steps up to Nina)
Vegeta: Hey You! Kazuya Mishima isn't it?
Kazuya: That's right.
Vegeta: Well I've noticed that you think you're quite hard.
Kazuya: What, you mean like you?
Vegeta: Well... yes. Also your arrogant, cocky, overbearing & proud...just like me.
We also both got suave hair.
Kazuya: So what! Do you want to be my best bud now!?
Lee: Sorry pal, positions taken! (puts arm round Kazuya)
Kazuya: Get your hand off me.
Lee: (retracts hand) Sorry.
Vegeta: Ha! Don't flatter yourself. I don't need any friends! (looks back to fight)
Gohan: C'mon, just give it up. I don't care if you're evil. I mean you're not bad....
just in love. Tell me, what's the worst thing you've done?
Nina: Do you really want to know.
Gohan: Sure.
Nina: Ok. While shopping one time, I took 11 items into the 10 items or less line.
Everyone: *gasp* *horror*
Gohan: (Clenches his fist) That's evil....but it can be forgiven.
Nina: Can it now? You don't sound too sure about that. Besides it doesn't end
there.....I paid in dimes.
Gohan: No! Stop!
Nina: Then I put all the stuff into un-recycled bags before loading them into my car
parked in the disabled section.
Gohan: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! (turns super saiya-jin 4) YOU'LL
PAY!!!!
Trunks: Oh man! Unreal!
Vegeta: Goddam shut up with that!
Nina: And to top it all off....I didn't put my cart away.
Gohan: BITCH!! I'LL KILL YOU!!!!!! (lunges towards Nina)
Nina & Gohan trade punches & kick for a while in the air, occasionally knocking each other into rocks & demolishing them in typical dragonball fashion.
Goku: Gohan is being sloppy. I bet you 5 bucks that we have to mop this up after.
Vegeta: I can't believe you'd bet against your own son.
Goku: You do it all the time.
Vegeta: Well I'm ace so I'm allowed. But I'll take your bet. Gohan will win.
Goku: So anyway...Say, do you think we could go super saiya-jin 5?
Vegeta: (shrugs) Maybe. I'd sure Like to.
Goku: That'd be cool.
Vegeta: You Know what.
Goku: What?
Vegeta: I'm Glad all those earth guys& Piccolo aren't here. I mean all they do is let us
fight because most of the time they don't even stand a chance. They always
come along to our adventures, all dressed up & stuff & they don't do anything
but comment on how good we are when we're winning & say how
were all doomed when we're losing.
Goku: Don't be so nasty. They helped in the cell saga when Gohan was losing that tug
of war with his kamehame. They all shot cell in the back.
Vegeta: Don't make such stupid comments. Cell was hardly bothered by those blasts.
It was my one that disturbed him long enough for Gohan to take advantage.
Goku: Yeah! & then I shouted, ` NOW'S YOUR CHANCE'
Vegeta: Yeah! Yeah! & all that heroic music.....
Goku: ...Then cell disintegrated.
Goku/Vegeta: *laugh hysterically*
Vegeta: Shouldn't we be watching the fight?
Goku: Oh yeah!
They look & see SSJ 4 Gohan & Nina both standing out of breath with tattered clothes & bleeding profusely. Conveniently, While Gohan has no top left, Nina has shards just in the right places to cover up.
Gohan: You're very strong. *huff puff*
Nina: *Huff* So are you. You're also very fast. *puff*
Gohan: *Huff* So are you. You're also very skilled. *puff*
Nina: I know. But you're not
Gohan: Oh I see. We're being honest.
Goku: Gohan! Enough of that crap. Do something drastic at the end that will just
scrape us the win.
Trunks: I'm tired of using that strategy. Don't we have any others?
Goku: *pssst* Vegeta, I really think you should stop hitting him so hard during
Sparring sessions.
Vegeta: Nonsense! (Smacks Trunks round the head).
Trunks: Thanks. I don't know what came over me.
Just then, Gohan comes crashing down a meter in front of them making a huge but not so huge crater.
Michelle: Just think Lee. If you even just dated Nina for a bit, you'd of saved Gohan
all that beating.
Lee's imagination of a date with Nina in a restaurant called Assassin Joint.
Nina:...& I killed him because he didn't ask me out for a second date.
Lee: *laughs nervously*
Nina: Yes that was amusing. Cheque please!
Waiter: Here you go ma'am.
Nina: Hey, this is the wrong cheque! (throws knife into waiters head)
Back in the real world
Kazuya: Well it wouldn't of stopped there. She would of made you marry her.
Lee's imagination at wedding
Kazuya: Congratulations, Lee! Have a....nice... honey moon. (wink & elbow in ribs)
Lee: *blushes*
Nina: Ok girls, get ready to catch the bouquet. (throws flowers)
Anna: (Catches flowers) oh my...
Nina: You! (throws knife into Anna's head)
Back in the real world
Heihachi: & then you'll give me grand children, who I would take in many helicopter
rides & cliff tours.
Lee's imagination again (he's nuts). This time in hospital maternity ward
Nina: Oh isn't she cute. Look Lee. That's your daughter.
Lee: I should hope so. Anyhow, what will we call her?
Doctor: How about Anna?
Baby: (Throws knife into doctors head)
Back in the real world
Jin: It would be so nice to have a new face in the family
Lee's imagination at his house where Kazuya has visited
Kazuya: Hello Charlotte Williams Mishima Chaolan, my niece from only brother Lee.
Is your daddy home?
Charlotte: Yes uncle Kazuya.
Kazuya: I got you a Malibu Barbie for your fifth birthday.
Charlotte: What! I wanted Ballet Barbie. (Throws Knife at Kazuya)
Kazuya:(Coolly catches knife without effort in between middle & fore-finger)
*yawn* Now Charlotte, you shouldn't play with assassin daggers.
Real world
Lee: Damn! There's aren't even any advantages! Oh well, for Gohan's sake, I'll have
to ask Nina out on a date & stop this.
King: Too late Romeo. Fights over.
Lee: What! Who won.
Xiaoyu: Gohan...*sigh*...He's so dreamy.
Lee: (looks & sees Gohan surrounded by all the women.) How'd he win!?
Lei: It was quite simple actually. You see his tail was*
King: HEY EVERYONE! BEACH PARTY!!
Everyone: runs to beach party.
Lee: But....but... my explanation.... Ah nuts. (turns around & is about to follow everyone but sees Nina. Out of kindness, he walks over)
Nina: *cry, sniff, sob*
Lee: Hey.
Nina: *sniff* Hi.
Lee: Listen...uh...well. This is going to sound really stupid but...Do you use
throwing knives?
Nina: No way! That's Anna's speciality. ....Did you really mean what you said about
only liking Japanese girls?
Lee: Heck no. I'm a really very open minded kinda guy.
Nina: (smiles at Lee)
Lee: (smiles back & sticks out hand to help Nina up)
Someone in audience: Getta room!!
Someone else in audience: Down in front!!
Lee: C'mon lets go to that beach party. (They do so.... Holding hands may I add. Course I may. I'm the author dammit!)
At the beach party they stand at the doorway & see a wild party going on. Trunks is loading the capsule with fuel while playing with a lighter. Goten is juggling the dragonballs. Yoshi is carving the boar on a spit. Vegeta, Paul, Jin, Heihachi & Kazuya argue over who's got the funkiest hair. Gohan is still surrounded by women. Law, Eddy & Hwoarang play some tunes. Armor King & King are getting too drunk for anyone's good. Goku is eating a comically large amount of food. Much more than people would normally eat. But for comedy's sake he eats it all up at a ridiculously fast rate.
Lee: C'mon lets join in.
Nina: No. They all hate me!
Lei: HEY EVERYONE ITS NINA & LEE!
Everyone: HI NINA & LEE!
Nina: I thought you'd all hate me.
Goku; No way! My forgiving & naïve ways are contagious to everyone!
Vegeta: Yeah! Even me. (kicks ground) I use to be such a bad
mutha...mumble...mumble.
Next day. The dragonball characters are ready to go back to their own planet.
Goku: Ok guys, are we all buckled in?
Gohan: Yup.
Vegeta: Have you got those dragonballs?
Goten: Yup.
Trunks: Take off in 5...4...3...2...1
Outside everyone sees the rocket take off.
Baek: I'll never forget those guys.
Lei: I won't forget them neither.
Baek: Forget who?
Lei: (Shrugs)
Baek: C'mon Hwoarang. Lets get back to Korea.
Paul: Yeah! C'mon guys. Flight to the US takes off in an hour.
All Americans & Mexicans: WE KNOW!!
Jin: How will us Japanese get back home!?
Kazuya: Oh no! (hugs Jin in fear)
Yoshimitsu: We're already in Japan idiots.
Jin: (pushes Kazuya off) I knew that.
Back in space
Vegeta: Hey! I never proved I could destroy that planet with 1 final flash........
THE END