A/N: Well, I'm back to humor in this chapter. But this chapter demonstrated to me that I am in dire need of a beta reader. Mostly what I need is someone I can bounce ideas off of, someone who is very good with character (as that is my biggest weakness), who is reasonably decent with grammar and spelling (though this isn't a big deal, as I'm more than capable of handling that), and who isn't afraid to be constructively critical. And, if it matters, I'm even willing to volunteer my beta/editing skills in return (yeah, I know, I just went off on how I need one, but I'm a decent editor, especially when it comes to plot and technical stuff). So, anyone interested, please e-mail me at peaceglow9@aol.com. Thanks. Anyway, here's the next bit.
Disclaimer: See Chapter One.
Chapter Four
The First Battle
A formal declaration took place the next morning. Harry--flanked by Ron and Hermione--and Draco--flanked by Pansy and Neil--met between their respective house tables. They both understood without saying a word, what was going on. Bowing slightly, their eyes never left the other's face. They straightened and walked away from each other, and the message was clear to the entire school. It was war.
The representatives of Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw had gone on the record as neutral, though Justin Finch-Fletchley pulled Hermione aside and-off the record-offered assistance if it were needed.
Hermione replied that she would have to bring the matter to Harry's attention. She confided to him, however, that she was confident some sort of arrangement could be worked out.
Ravenclaw was more committed to their neutrality, even offering to help negotiate a peaceful settlement. They were politely--but firmly--refused.
What surprised all parties was the indifference of the professors to the whole thing. They might have understood if they'd known that there was a considerable amount of money on the outcome. 2-1 odds that Gryffindor would defeat Slytherin. The potential financial rewards were too great for the professors to be keen to put a premature stop to it.
***
That night, after dinner, Ginny and Larissa met up in the deserted classroom that evening. Their faces were grim, what with war having been declared and all.
"So," Larissa said, "do you have any ideas about how to end this thing? Because I've been thinking about it all day, and the only thing I can come up with is that one of us might have to leak some information."
Ginny shook her head. "I can't think of anything, beyond faking an injury, leaking information to the enemy," at this, Ginny made a sour face, "or one of us breaking a school rule-a big one. Even worse, I wouldn't have the slightest idea of how to go about any of them."
Larissa sighed. "Well, perhaps we ought to just enjoy humiliating the Slytherins with the next prank, then come up with something."
In response, Ginny smirked slightly. "Yeah, maybe you're right. The next one ought to be a good one. Harry, Ron, and Hermione have spent their entire lunch break in the library." Her face turned a little more serious. "Ok, one more prank. Then we get to work on ending this thing." She went slightly red. "I don't think I could stand to go through that humiliation . . . with Harry . . . again."
Larissa nodded in understanding. "Ok, Gin. Let's get back to the common room." Her face assumed a cynical smile. "Wouldn't want to keep the troops waiting if the general is planning a staff meeting."
Ginny's face turned even pinker as they headed back to the common room. "I wish you wouldn't call him that," she mumbled to her friend, who just grinned evilly in response.
***
The entire school waited with baited breath for the Gryffindors to answer what became known as the Gryffindor Dance Off of '97. A week passed, but the Gryffindors remained very low key, not drawing any attention to themselves, aside from the occasional glower at their enemies.
The Slytherins maintained constant vigilance, not fooled by the Gryffindors' silence. Draco ran a tight ship and, for the most part, the Slytherins were on alert 24/7. A small minority, however, was beginning to lose their nerve, wondering when the next prank would come.
Their questions were answered two weeks after the declaration of war. Everyone was eating breakfast in the Great Hall. The Gryffindors were chatting amongst themselves, paying no mind to anyone else. The Slytherins were warily eyeing the Gryffindors, their wands at the ready. The Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws (and, indeed, the professors) were watching the two rival houses, wondering if this would be the day that the Gryffindors would strike back.
It was halfway through breakfast that it happened. Draco Malfoy, who had been watching his nemesis intently throughout the meal, had felt something land on his foot, and he looked down to investigate. This proved to be a mistake.
At that moment, Harry, Ron, Hermione, Dean, Seamus, Ginny, and Larissa brought their wands to bear on the Slytherins, and began to mutter a variety of spells. At the sound of their voices, jets of colored light shot from their wands and impacted the Slytherins, who had been reaching for their wands.
They had not been quick enough, and the result was rather remarkable. The Slytherins looked down to find that they were wearing odd clothes-obviously Muggle. The girls were wearing dresses out of a very ugly floral print that seemed too heavy to be normal for clothes, and their hair was either in pigtails or in braids. The boys were wearing overalls that ended at their knees. Underneath the overalls, they were wearing Muggle shirts, both of which were made out of the same material as the girls' outfits.
Draco Malfoy, however, was not dressed like the other boys. He, like the girls, was wearing a dress, but it was made out of lighter material, and was a rather happy shade of yellow. His normally short white-blonde hair had become a more reddish golden color and had grown out to approximate a bob. In his hand, he clutched a guitar.
The rest of the students barely had time to process this information before Malfoy began to strum the guitar. The other Slytherins, much to their embarrassment, crowded around him eagerly.
Pansy Parkington piped up with a cheerful voice. "Teach us how to sing!" She turned red afterwards, quite embarrassed.
Draco was red too when he replied, much more cheerfully than he had ever
said anything in his life. "Alright then!" Only his eyes shone
with the utter horror and revulsion he felt, as the rest of his face was
twisted into his equivalent of a wide smile. Then he began to sing. Joyfully.
"Do, a deer, a female deer,
Re, a drop of golden sun.
Mi, a name I call myself,
Fa, a long, long way to run."
Here, the pace started to pick up and the Slytherins found, to their horror, that they were swaying in time to the music and grinning merrily.
"So, a needle pulling thread!
La, a note to follow So!
Ti, a drink with jam and bread!
That will bring us back to Doe."
Much against their will, the Slytherins stood up and, lining up behind Malfoy, began to sing with him.
"Do, a deer, a female deer,"
The Slytherins, with Malfoy in the lead, began a spirited procession around their table.
"Re, a drop of golden sun."
The procession snaked its way to the Ravenclaws' table.
"Mi, a name, I call myself,"
They were skipping around it.
"Fa, a long, long way to run!"
The procession moved towards the Hufflepuffs, who were trying to keep the delight and amusement off their faces. And failing miserably.
"So, a needle pulling thread!"
They even had hand gestures to match the lyrics.
"La, a note to follow So!"
They frolicked past the table where the Professors were, towards the Gryffindors, who were roaring with laughter.
"Ti, a drink with jam and bread!"
They had reached the Gryffindors and had organized themselves in an eye-pleasing manner, which was made even more pleasant by the cute little dance steps they did.
"That will bring us back to Do!"
The last note was held quite a lengthy amount of time. When it finally died, the only sounds one could hear were the loud laughs of the Gryffindors, along with some sniggers from the Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws.
The Slytherins were silent, eyeing the Gryffindors with an odd combination of hatred, horror, embarrassment, a smidgen of fear, and another healthy dose of hatred for good measure.
Amidst the gales of laughter and mocking applause of the Gryffindors, the Slytherins quietly filed out of the Great Hall, eager to change.
Draco Malfoy was already plotting revenge, enraged at the prank. As
he made his way to the Slytherin common room, he thought angrily that the
Gryffindors hadn't even had enough honor to change him back to normal.