Chapter 2: confiding
The next thing I knew, I was on the train on my way to school. I watched my two henchmen fight over who gets the last chocolate frog. I rolled my eyes and muttered to myself, "there's too much masculinity in here." I get up with out saying a word to either one of them and make my way down the corridor. I stop when I heard two people talking.
"Look harry, we had fun, but I'm not gay. That whole thing with you was just experimentation for both of us and you know it. I want to go out with Hermione now." The voice belonged to Weasley. He was talking to potter. This was great stuff. Part of me wanted to run around telling everyone in sight what I had just heard, but most of me wanted to find out more. I ducked behind a wall when Weasley came out. He was most likely going to go and find that mudbl- to find Hermione. I slowly walked inside the compartment to find potter looking out the window. It took him a while to realize someone else was there.
"Great." He said with a harsh tone of voice. "Malfoy, I'm really not in the mood for your shit right now, okay?"
I just stood there. I couldn't move. I couldn't speak. I was completely lost in him. I saw him differently now which, I believe was because of me not being under my father's curse and my discovery about myself. This boy, no, this man, my arch nemesis for six years, confused me. There was so much mystery in his eyes. they sparkled with angst. I searched them for some emotion other than hate, I kept looking and thought I had found something more, but I was interrupted.
"Malfoy!" he screamed. "If you're going to give me shit, do it quickly, but if you're just going to stand there like a stupid git, then leave."
Potter had obviously grown over the holiday too. Normally he would not be so harsh with me. I found myself sitting next to him after what he said had settled in. "look potter, I know I've been somewhat of a- " I started.
"daft prick." He finished.
I smiled. "that's how I would put it." I laughed, and after a bout of confusion on his part, he did too. His smile was so genuine and pure. I simply sat there and looked at him.
"so…uh…Malfoy, what exactly do you want?"
I snapped out of my trance and spoke, "I wanted to apologize."
He looked at me rather shocked. "apologize?!"
"yes, apologize for six years of name calling, pranks, and rumors."
"rumors?!" he looked at me with his emerald circles burning.
"yeah…in fifth year, I kind of told everyone in my house that you were gay and made a pass at me." I looked down at my feet which rested lightly on the ground.
"well, one part is true. I AM gay."
I couldn't believe he was telling me this.
"oh." Was all I could say. "well, I am too." I looked up at him. I thought I would find a surprised look, but I found nothing of the sort. Potter looked, he looked smug.
"yeah, I knew. We have a kind of radar."
"you knew? You knew all along?"
"since last year. That's when I came out."
I could not speak. I could not move. I simply sat there in silence until he spoke.
"Malfoy?"
I looked up at him.
"why are you so nice now?"
I told him the story of my summer. How I broke free of my fathers clutches which cost him his life. I told him about Michael and how my father killed my only true friend.
"I'm so sorry." He said as he put his hand on my shoulder. I felt shivers go up and down my spine as he made contact with my body.
"the bastard deserved it. I hated him. I don't give a shit." I looked up and into his eyes. I soon darted mine away from his as a began to speak again. "do you think, I mean, if it's okay. Since we have had this heart- to-heart and all and are kind of friends, that we could be on a first name basis?"
"I guess that would be all right Draco." He extended his hand and asked, "friends?"
I held out my hand and shook his. "I hope so harry."
We shook hands for what seemed like an eternity. It was as though the world existed only for us. I continued my search in his eyes. I finally found what I was looking for. It was all I needed in another human being. Something I have never had in any relationship before this. Something I was looking for all my life, whether I knew I was looking, or not. I found acceptance and unconditional love.
Harry took a step closer to me and I did the same. We both continued to step closer together until we were so close that I could feel his breath against my lips.
"have you ever kissed another man, Draco?" he asked.
"no." I said. Our eyes never blinked and never left one another's. his head turned; mine did as well. I was mere millimeters from my once enemies lips when the train stopped. Weasley- er- Ron came back with Hermione. I said goodbye to harry and ignored the looks of confusion on his friend's faces. I walked back to my compartment to gather my followers.
The next thing I knew, I was on the train on my way to school. I watched my two henchmen fight over who gets the last chocolate frog. I rolled my eyes and muttered to myself, "there's too much masculinity in here." I get up with out saying a word to either one of them and make my way down the corridor. I stop when I heard two people talking.
"Look harry, we had fun, but I'm not gay. That whole thing with you was just experimentation for both of us and you know it. I want to go out with Hermione now." The voice belonged to Weasley. He was talking to potter. This was great stuff. Part of me wanted to run around telling everyone in sight what I had just heard, but most of me wanted to find out more. I ducked behind a wall when Weasley came out. He was most likely going to go and find that mudbl- to find Hermione. I slowly walked inside the compartment to find potter looking out the window. It took him a while to realize someone else was there.
"Great." He said with a harsh tone of voice. "Malfoy, I'm really not in the mood for your shit right now, okay?"
I just stood there. I couldn't move. I couldn't speak. I was completely lost in him. I saw him differently now which, I believe was because of me not being under my father's curse and my discovery about myself. This boy, no, this man, my arch nemesis for six years, confused me. There was so much mystery in his eyes. they sparkled with angst. I searched them for some emotion other than hate, I kept looking and thought I had found something more, but I was interrupted.
"Malfoy!" he screamed. "If you're going to give me shit, do it quickly, but if you're just going to stand there like a stupid git, then leave."
Potter had obviously grown over the holiday too. Normally he would not be so harsh with me. I found myself sitting next to him after what he said had settled in. "look potter, I know I've been somewhat of a- " I started.
"daft prick." He finished.
I smiled. "that's how I would put it." I laughed, and after a bout of confusion on his part, he did too. His smile was so genuine and pure. I simply sat there and looked at him.
"so…uh…Malfoy, what exactly do you want?"
I snapped out of my trance and spoke, "I wanted to apologize."
He looked at me rather shocked. "apologize?!"
"yes, apologize for six years of name calling, pranks, and rumors."
"rumors?!" he looked at me with his emerald circles burning.
"yeah…in fifth year, I kind of told everyone in my house that you were gay and made a pass at me." I looked down at my feet which rested lightly on the ground.
"well, one part is true. I AM gay."
I couldn't believe he was telling me this.
"oh." Was all I could say. "well, I am too." I looked up at him. I thought I would find a surprised look, but I found nothing of the sort. Potter looked, he looked smug.
"yeah, I knew. We have a kind of radar."
"you knew? You knew all along?"
"since last year. That's when I came out."
I could not speak. I could not move. I simply sat there in silence until he spoke.
"Malfoy?"
I looked up at him.
"why are you so nice now?"
I told him the story of my summer. How I broke free of my fathers clutches which cost him his life. I told him about Michael and how my father killed my only true friend.
"I'm so sorry." He said as he put his hand on my shoulder. I felt shivers go up and down my spine as he made contact with my body.
"the bastard deserved it. I hated him. I don't give a shit." I looked up and into his eyes. I soon darted mine away from his as a began to speak again. "do you think, I mean, if it's okay. Since we have had this heart- to-heart and all and are kind of friends, that we could be on a first name basis?"
"I guess that would be all right Draco." He extended his hand and asked, "friends?"
I held out my hand and shook his. "I hope so harry."
We shook hands for what seemed like an eternity. It was as though the world existed only for us. I continued my search in his eyes. I finally found what I was looking for. It was all I needed in another human being. Something I have never had in any relationship before this. Something I was looking for all my life, whether I knew I was looking, or not. I found acceptance and unconditional love.
Harry took a step closer to me and I did the same. We both continued to step closer together until we were so close that I could feel his breath against my lips.
"have you ever kissed another man, Draco?" he asked.
"no." I said. Our eyes never blinked and never left one another's. his head turned; mine did as well. I was mere millimeters from my once enemies lips when the train stopped. Weasley- er- Ron came back with Hermione. I said goodbye to harry and ignored the looks of confusion on his friend's faces. I walked back to my compartment to gather my followers.