Road Rage Kain Chapter 3: The Ride Home.
Scene: The minivan has just pulled out of Six Clans' parking lot. All of the clan leaders are tired after their day of fun (except for Zephon who didn't do anything all day) and are
sleeping in the back seats.
Kain- I'm glad this day's over.
Ariel- Oh, Kain...shut up. It could have been worse. One of the boys could have been hurt.
Kain- They did.
Ariel- Oh, that's right. Well, one of the boys could have been killed.
Kain- That would have been a bad thing?
Some time later
Kain- I hate this drive. ! *Kain sees a raccoon in the road* Is that a raccoon? *Kain's eyes
widen as he swirves to hit the raccoon. The thud that the raccoon makes as it's squished beneath
the tires wakes the clan leaders.* Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Ariel- Kain! Did you just hit that poor little thing on purpose?
Kain- Yes, and it was fun too; the only fun I've had today. Ha ha ha ha ha! *Ariel puts her hand
to her mouth in disgust. Kain looks at the clock* Aaargh! We've got to get back to the Sanctuary.
A&E is showing my Biography tonight.
Zephon- Step on it, Kain! *Kain floors it*
Raziel- This is SWEET!
Turel- I didn't think a minivan could go this fast!
Ariel- Kain, how fast are we going?
Dumah- *laughing* Who cares?!
Rahab- It's not like any of us can die, we're immortal.
Ariel- That's not what I meant....
*A police siren is heard in the background*
Ariel- *pointing to the back* That's what I was afraid of.
Kain- Rrrrrgh! *pulls the van over*
Melchiah- We're gonna get sent to jail!
Zephon- I don't wanna go to jail! *He and Melchiah hold onto each other and start crying*
Ariel- Don't cry you guys, you won't go to jail.....
Raziel- *interrupting* Yeah, you guys'll go to juvenille hall.
Turel- Yeah ha ha ha! Detention Center for the vamp babies! *Raz and Turel start laughing*
Kain- You two would be going there too, you know.
*Raz and Turel stop laughing*
R & T- Oh......*they slump back slowly into their seats with worried looks on there faces*
*Cop approaches the van*
Cop- Going a little fast there eh?
Kain- So? *Shrugs his shoulders*
Cop- Hmm, your eyes are a little bloodshot, have you been drinking?
Kain- *agitated, although he HAD been drinking at the Tavern* Well officer, your eyes look
glazed, have you been eating donuts?
Cop- *Looking at his gut that was covered with donut glaze* Hey! License and registration.
Kain- I don't have either.
Cop- What? Outta the van. *Kain steps out of the van. The clan leaders snicker a bit*
Rahab- Stupid cop's gonna get it now.
Cop- Hands behind your head.
Kain- Ok *Puts his hands behind his head, only to bring them down with a crushing force.*
Clan Leaders- YEAHHH!! GET HIM KAIN!
*Kain gets back into the van, and continues driving.*
-One hour later.-
Dumah- I need to stretch out my legs
Rahab- I'm hungry.
Zephon- I'm thirsty.
Melchiah- I have to go to the bathroom again.
Raziel- Kain, can we maybe take a short break?
Kain- I'm already late. My biography starts soon.
Ariel- Lets rest, Kain. The boys need it.
Kain- I'll pull into the nearest rest station, but if I miss my biography, I'm throwing all of you into the Abyss!
-About 20 minutes later they came across a truck stop. They decided to pull over and rest for about
half an hour.-
*Raz and Turel check out the place*
Raz- Look! A pool table.
Turel- Lets play. *They go off and play pool*
Dumah- Look! They have a mini-arcade. *Dumah and Rahab go off to play a fighting game, Melchiah goes off to watch.*
Kain- Ah, there's a TV here. *He sits next to a young woman who is also a sorceress*
Sorceress- Hi.
Kain- Good evening.
Sorceress- So, what do you wanna watch?
Kain- My biography starts in a few minutes.
Sorceress- Ok, lets watch that. *she turns on A&E. The biography starts up and they watch it*
Zephon- *Outside by himself* I'm bored. *Since no one's watching him, he goes
off into the parking lot where the semis are.* I wanna ride one of those big trucks! *He looks through the trucks to see if any of them have keys.* Hey, looky here, *pulls out a set of keys* Heh heh heh heh! *he starts the engine and puts the truck into drive*
Back inside...
Raz- No, Turel, it's my turn, I get to go!
Turel- No you don't. You just had your turn.
Raz- Yeah, but you got the cue ball into the pocket on your last turn, so I get an extra turn.
Turel- No you don't!
Raz- Yes I do.
Turel- No you don't! *Throws the 8 ball at Raziel*
Raz- AAAAAAAAH! That hurt. *Throws the 7 ball at Turel, he ducks, the ball goes through Ariel and hits Dumah on the back of the head. Raziel and Turel each pick up a cue stick and start fighting it out*
Dumah- OOOOOOUUUCH! Melchiah! What was that for?
Melchiah- I didn't do anything.
Dumah- Yes you did, you hit me on the back of my head.
Rahab- YES! I WON!
Dumah- That's not fair, Melchiah distracted me.
Rahab- Don't be a sore loser.
Dumah- Bite me. *Rahab tries to bite Dumah, but Dumah uses Melchiah as a shield. Rahab then has a mouth full of Melchiah's old skin. Needless to say, they fight it out.*
Sorceress- Kain, aren't you gonna stop them?
Kain- No. As long as nothing gets destroyed I don't care what they do to each other. So, you are a sorceress.
Sorceress- Yup. Sorceresses pass on their powers from one to another. I was about 11 when I
received the *looking outside* HOLY SHIT!!!!!!
Kain- *Confused* When you received holy *looking outside* SHIT!!!!!
*Zephon, with a cowboy hat on, is riding their way in a big ass semi truck. As he approaches the
building he starts blowing the horn*
Zephon- YEEEEEE-HAAAAAW! *He crashes into the building. He parks the semi in the middle of the floor*
Kain- Zephon, what the hell are you doing!?!
Zephon- I was having fun.
Kain- We gotta get out of here! ARIEL! BOYS! INTO THE VAN! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!
*They all run into the van. Well, in Ariel's case, float. *
Kain- What is your major malfunction, Zephon? Can't you keep your hands to yourself? I don't know when I've been so embarrassed.
Zephon- I'm sorry.
Kain- Sorry doesn't cut it. What if someone got killed?
Zephon- Ummmm....
Melchiah- I woulda skinned 'em!
Kain- Arrgh! Shut up, Melchiah!
Ariel- Kain, calm down before you have a stroke.
Kain- Bite it, bitch! *Starts Sniffing* What's that smell? *A smile comes across Melchiah's face*
Dumah- Awww, Melchiah cut one.
Melchiah- Hee hee.
Kain- Everybody, roll down the windows.
Turel- But, Kain, it's raining outside. Hard!
Kain- Shut up and roll down the windows.
*They roll down the windows and rain starts coming in*
CLs- AAAAAAAAHHH!!
Raziel- Burning! White hot fire!
And so Kain and his lieutenants returned to the Sanctuary. They all went to their beds and had
dreams about God knows what. Hey, I'm not a vampire, I don't know what they dream about. Thus this adventure has concluded.
THE END