Well here goes.................
I won't go in to details what happend over the next few days. We kept him locked in his room. He cursed at us and tried several times to escape. He never did get violent with either of us though. We knew that he could fool us one day and as soon as he was out of the room could get new drugs. I was hoping he wouldn't.
It was late one evening when Doc had to visit a patient who was in critical condition. He hated leaving me but it was clear this patient of his needed him more then H did at the moment. Besides I would be there. We had kept H locked up for a week and decided enough was enough. During this time I had not gone outside even though both Mrs. Hudson and Doc had tried several times to make me go out. "Take a walk and clear your mind." Doc had said. Hmm, right. "Get some air."
I unlocked the door and went in to see H. As before the room was dark. I walked over to his bed to see him sleeping. I took the cloth that was next to the pitch of water, dipped a little and seated myself on the bed. Carefully I took some of his sweat away from his forehead. Suddenly he opened his eyes and turned to look at me. A small smile came across his features.
"My angel." He said.
"No just plain old G.G." I said smiling as I withdrew my hand who was holding the cloth.
"No so." He retorted as he gently grabbed it. His eyes searched mine. "Stay with me." He then said softly.
This was not what I had expected to hear. "You need your sleep. I'll be here."
Still holding my hand he proped himself up on one of his elbows. Suddenly it hit me. He wasn't asking me to stay with him. He was asking me to stay alright but in a more 'intimate' way.
By looking at me he understood that I had finally realized what he meant. "Please."
Oh damn it. I was in trouble now. "H, you don't know what you are saying. You are...."
His tone rose a bit. "No. I know what I want." Then softened again. "What I want....is you."
He drew me down to the bed and in a fast move I was suddenly under him. His lips came on to mine and then I knew I was lost.
I opened my eyes slowly. I felt an arm around me and my head was rested on H's chest. I had to get away. I felt I had violated him. I shouldn't be here. Carefully I slipped out of his embrace. He moved over to his side but didn't wake. Thank God. I dressed as quietly as I could. When finished I walked over to the door, unlocked it and let myself out. This time I did not lock the door. I went to the sitting room and slumped down in one of the chairs. Think it was H's chair. I don't know what time it was but all I knew was I hoped Doc would be around soon. Funny enough at that moment I heard someone coming up the stairs.
"G.G." He greeted me as he came in.
"Doc." I tried smiling but failed.
"What's wrong?" He seated himself in his old chair.
"I have done something horrible."
He didn't say anything. He just waited for me to tell him what I needed to say. So I told him what had happend. Well, not the intimate details.
"And you find this terrible because...?"
I was supprised and showed it. "Because I was took advantage of him when he was weak."
"I don't think so my dear. If he really did not wanna be with you he would never had asked you."
"True but can you honestly say H would have asked me if he had not been in that condition?"
He couldn't. "No but let me tell you that I do know that Holmes has deep feelings for you. In fact he told me so about a week ago."
"Oh." This was news to me ofcourse.
"Yes, I was not going to tell you but seeing the recent events I think I must."
"Go on." I urged him.
"Very well. It was late an evening, your second day here, when I was about to retire the doorbell rang and when I opened was supprised to see Holmes looking back at me."
**I am sorry to disturb you at this hour Watson but I could use your help.**
"I gestured for him to come in. We seated ourself on opposite chairs and I could tell something was bothering him. A new case perhaps."
**Watson, you do know, I hope, that even if I do not express it so much you are my closest and dearest friend. Therefore when I need help I always ask you. I do need your help because for once I am completely lost.**
"Oh how so? I had asked. What ever was on his mind it was difficult to talk about so for a while he just sat still staring in front of him. Then he suddenly spoke again."
**I have noticed that I've developed some rather strange feelings towards G.G.**
"Holmes, have you ever had these feelings before? I asked."
**No, never.**
"I think you know what they are don't you?"
He looked at me as if searching my face. **It can not be. I am not capable of that kind of........emotion.**
"Apparently my friend, you are. Tell me when did you discover you had these feelings?"
He shook his head. **I am not sure. When we found her on the street I felt this tightened feeling in my chest. I had seen women before who were beautiful but she....I knew from the moment she first spoke to us she was different but I later asssumend that was because she was from a totally different place then ours. However, the way she talks, smiles, listens when I talk......I even like the way she calls me H.**
"H? I had asked to which he had simply nodded."
"When he did not countinue I asked. Did something happend today?"
**Not really. I guided her to see things I thought might intrest her, we talked......" He paused. "When we returned to Baker Street it was late but before she went to her room she thanked me for a good time and....**
"And? I had probed."
**...and she kissed me on the check.**
"I see. At that point I could not hide my smile."
**Damn it Watson it's not funny.** "He stood up and started pacing."
"No perhaps not. So this kiss made you realize your feelings for her?"
**Something of the sort. I am, for one of the rare times in my life, at a complete loss.**
"What do you feel would be the right thing to do?"
**To ignore it.**
"I wouldn't recommend that. Holmes, I understand this is new to you but I would advise you to, in your own time, talk to her about this."
**Are you mad?**
"You will only feel worse but pretending there isn't something there."
**Watson, you must realize there are issues here. She may possible not feel the same way I feel..." I was about to say something but he held his hand up to stop me.".....even if she did this is not her time.**
"Meaning if you do tell her and she feels the same way you are due to be seperated at one point."
**Yes.**
"She may also never find her way home and if you wait to long, find another gentleman right here. I could see that this possibility had not occured to him."
**Indeed you are right. Oh the dilemma. I thank you for your time Watson and no doubt will see you tomorrow.**
"And that my dear is what was told."
I had listened closely to everything he had said. I remember kissing him in the cheek but didn't think of how it would affect him. How could I? My brother always said H was cold to women so naturally I didn't expect him to fall for me. Then it hit me.
"So you are saying that the reason he took the cocaine in the first place was because of me?"
I could see I was right. "Do not blame yourself. He would have resorted to it for another reason at some pont."
I got up and started walking around. "Great. Seems I really make a mess if things here. How do I look?"
He looked at me startled. "What?"
"Do I look presentabel?"
"Yes, you look fine."
"Good thanks. I'm going out. Tell H not to worry but I don't know when I'll be back." I started for the door but turned and added. "I need to clear my mind."
He nodded.
I won't go in to details what happend over the next few days. We kept him locked in his room. He cursed at us and tried several times to escape. He never did get violent with either of us though. We knew that he could fool us one day and as soon as he was out of the room could get new drugs. I was hoping he wouldn't.
It was late one evening when Doc had to visit a patient who was in critical condition. He hated leaving me but it was clear this patient of his needed him more then H did at the moment. Besides I would be there. We had kept H locked up for a week and decided enough was enough. During this time I had not gone outside even though both Mrs. Hudson and Doc had tried several times to make me go out. "Take a walk and clear your mind." Doc had said. Hmm, right. "Get some air."
I unlocked the door and went in to see H. As before the room was dark. I walked over to his bed to see him sleeping. I took the cloth that was next to the pitch of water, dipped a little and seated myself on the bed. Carefully I took some of his sweat away from his forehead. Suddenly he opened his eyes and turned to look at me. A small smile came across his features.
"My angel." He said.
"No just plain old G.G." I said smiling as I withdrew my hand who was holding the cloth.
"No so." He retorted as he gently grabbed it. His eyes searched mine. "Stay with me." He then said softly.
This was not what I had expected to hear. "You need your sleep. I'll be here."
Still holding my hand he proped himself up on one of his elbows. Suddenly it hit me. He wasn't asking me to stay with him. He was asking me to stay alright but in a more 'intimate' way.
By looking at me he understood that I had finally realized what he meant. "Please."
Oh damn it. I was in trouble now. "H, you don't know what you are saying. You are...."
His tone rose a bit. "No. I know what I want." Then softened again. "What I want....is you."
He drew me down to the bed and in a fast move I was suddenly under him. His lips came on to mine and then I knew I was lost.
I opened my eyes slowly. I felt an arm around me and my head was rested on H's chest. I had to get away. I felt I had violated him. I shouldn't be here. Carefully I slipped out of his embrace. He moved over to his side but didn't wake. Thank God. I dressed as quietly as I could. When finished I walked over to the door, unlocked it and let myself out. This time I did not lock the door. I went to the sitting room and slumped down in one of the chairs. Think it was H's chair. I don't know what time it was but all I knew was I hoped Doc would be around soon. Funny enough at that moment I heard someone coming up the stairs.
"G.G." He greeted me as he came in.
"Doc." I tried smiling but failed.
"What's wrong?" He seated himself in his old chair.
"I have done something horrible."
He didn't say anything. He just waited for me to tell him what I needed to say. So I told him what had happend. Well, not the intimate details.
"And you find this terrible because...?"
I was supprised and showed it. "Because I was took advantage of him when he was weak."
"I don't think so my dear. If he really did not wanna be with you he would never had asked you."
"True but can you honestly say H would have asked me if he had not been in that condition?"
He couldn't. "No but let me tell you that I do know that Holmes has deep feelings for you. In fact he told me so about a week ago."
"Oh." This was news to me ofcourse.
"Yes, I was not going to tell you but seeing the recent events I think I must."
"Go on." I urged him.
"Very well. It was late an evening, your second day here, when I was about to retire the doorbell rang and when I opened was supprised to see Holmes looking back at me."
**I am sorry to disturb you at this hour Watson but I could use your help.**
"I gestured for him to come in. We seated ourself on opposite chairs and I could tell something was bothering him. A new case perhaps."
**Watson, you do know, I hope, that even if I do not express it so much you are my closest and dearest friend. Therefore when I need help I always ask you. I do need your help because for once I am completely lost.**
"Oh how so? I had asked. What ever was on his mind it was difficult to talk about so for a while he just sat still staring in front of him. Then he suddenly spoke again."
**I have noticed that I've developed some rather strange feelings towards G.G.**
"Holmes, have you ever had these feelings before? I asked."
**No, never.**
"I think you know what they are don't you?"
He looked at me as if searching my face. **It can not be. I am not capable of that kind of........emotion.**
"Apparently my friend, you are. Tell me when did you discover you had these feelings?"
He shook his head. **I am not sure. When we found her on the street I felt this tightened feeling in my chest. I had seen women before who were beautiful but she....I knew from the moment she first spoke to us she was different but I later asssumend that was because she was from a totally different place then ours. However, the way she talks, smiles, listens when I talk......I even like the way she calls me H.**
"H? I had asked to which he had simply nodded."
"When he did not countinue I asked. Did something happend today?"
**Not really. I guided her to see things I thought might intrest her, we talked......" He paused. "When we returned to Baker Street it was late but before she went to her room she thanked me for a good time and....**
"And? I had probed."
**...and she kissed me on the check.**
"I see. At that point I could not hide my smile."
**Damn it Watson it's not funny.** "He stood up and started pacing."
"No perhaps not. So this kiss made you realize your feelings for her?"
**Something of the sort. I am, for one of the rare times in my life, at a complete loss.**
"What do you feel would be the right thing to do?"
**To ignore it.**
"I wouldn't recommend that. Holmes, I understand this is new to you but I would advise you to, in your own time, talk to her about this."
**Are you mad?**
"You will only feel worse but pretending there isn't something there."
**Watson, you must realize there are issues here. She may possible not feel the same way I feel..." I was about to say something but he held his hand up to stop me.".....even if she did this is not her time.**
"Meaning if you do tell her and she feels the same way you are due to be seperated at one point."
**Yes.**
"She may also never find her way home and if you wait to long, find another gentleman right here. I could see that this possibility had not occured to him."
**Indeed you are right. Oh the dilemma. I thank you for your time Watson and no doubt will see you tomorrow.**
"And that my dear is what was told."
I had listened closely to everything he had said. I remember kissing him in the cheek but didn't think of how it would affect him. How could I? My brother always said H was cold to women so naturally I didn't expect him to fall for me. Then it hit me.
"So you are saying that the reason he took the cocaine in the first place was because of me?"
I could see I was right. "Do not blame yourself. He would have resorted to it for another reason at some pont."
I got up and started walking around. "Great. Seems I really make a mess if things here. How do I look?"
He looked at me startled. "What?"
"Do I look presentabel?"
"Yes, you look fine."
"Good thanks. I'm going out. Tell H not to worry but I don't know when I'll be back." I started for the door but turned and added. "I need to clear my mind."
He nodded.