Many thanks to JKR for this fun world to muck about it. Thanks also to Reive for one of the best lines ever. Hope you like the bizarre antics of Lucius and Severus. I may write a fic just for them later on, but this wouldn't get out of my head.
-----------
A busy street. The colorful flow of traffic, lives wending seamlessly around each other with the briefest of interactions. Anonymous, and still connected.
Observing the parade of human flesh were two young men casually ensconced in the window of a quiet restaurant. The remains of afternoon tea were spread between them, small blue cups and plates that occasionally whispered amongst themselves.
Both had sharp features and long hair, pulled back and tied with dark green ribbons. Here their similarities ended. One was fair, with the fine features of an aristocratic portrait and could have passed for the cousin of a Veela. The other had a strong Roman nose and shiny black hair. Chance could not have chosen such a perfectly contrasted couple.
"Any ideas?" Severus Snape picked up the last small sandwich and chewed slowly, as if his jaw might crack through any strenuous exertion. The empty plate skittered over to join its companion on the sideboard.
"I haven't seen any I liked yet," the other sighed, tapping his long fingers on his sleeve. His pale eyes swept the crowds pushing by on the London street.
"Your standards Lucius are both too high and too low. I don't know how you do it."
"I don't know what you're talking about," Lucuis Malfoy replied absently.
"Just pick one," Severus grumbled. "It's not like we need to catch a unicorn or something."
"I don't know I rather like that type. They're so… fragile."
The dark haired one sighed and gestured at the tea. The cup chirped happily and filled itself. Snape smiled slightly. As annoying as he found most enchanted household objects, the tea sets at Balanton's amused him. Lucius looked at him from the corner of his eye.
"I don't see why you're complaining, we have all summer."
"I don't plan on spending my summer sitting here waiting for you to make up your mind."
Lucius shrugged and renewed his attention on the street. Absently he straightened the folds of his grey robes. The faintly shimmering fabric smoothed under his fingers, reflecting light from the window.
"You could help me here instead of sulking, you know," he drawled.
"I am not going to help your ridiculous habits and you know that. I might help you with something else though." Snape rested on foot on Malfoy's knee, pushing his leg back and forth with a smile.
"So unhelpful Severus." Lucius sighed theatrically and arched one eyebrow at his companion. "Perhaps I ought to just eviscerate you tonight and rid myself of your charming cynicism."
"And who would help you in arithmacy then?" Snape snorted. Malfoy leaned towards the window.
"What do you think of that one? Standing in front of the pastry shop?" He pointed out a petite red haired Muggle bent towards a window display of petit fours.
"She'll do. Come on then," Severus replied. He pulled Malfoy to his feet, waved goodbye at the squeaking teacups and headed for the street.
"This is so silly."
"But amusing nonetheless."
"That doesn't make it any less ridiculous. It's so clichéd."
"I don't see you offering up anything more entertaining."
From their brooms, they observed the frantic young woman scampering through the hedge maze. Lucius had added a few extra things to his mother's garden for their unwilling guest. Mildly impressed that the Muggle had escaped the giant scorpion, Severus wondered how much longer Lucius would insist on this folly.
They flew lower, as the terrified Muggle girl ran haphazardly through the bushes. She panted, cheeks flushed and scratched. A few leaves were caught in her red curls, and her dress was torn. Somewhere she had lost her sandals, and Severus could see blood and dirt streaking her pale skin. Lucius sighed in contentment at the sight.
"Let's go get her, shall we?"
Will a dull thunk, the girl's corpse slid off the dining table.
"Must you do that?" Lucius inquired acidly.
"She's dead," Severus replied. "What do you want to keep her around for?"
"I don't know." The blond wizard shrugged.
"Don't take up necrophilia Lucius, it's so sordid." Snape sat on the tabletop and picked up a napkin. With a dismissive flick, Lucius took the cloth away, dropping it on the floor. Malfoy flicked his tongue lightly over Snape's pale skin, licking away the smears of blood.
"Stop."
Snape turned back to face Hana Hooch, who looked faintly ill.
"Something upset you my dear?" he sneered.
"Next time I will remember to skip dinner before I visit you. What you did to that girl was absolutely repulsive. Not to mention…"
"What I did with Lucius Malfoy afterwards?" His voice dripped with scorn and amusement. "You're surprisingly prudish Hana."
"Oh shut up Severus." She pressed her fingers to her temples. Her eyes gleamed with amber sparks. "You must have atrocious nightmares."
"Sometimes."
Hooch leaned heavily against the desk. What did he want from her? What was the purpose of these odd confessions? She couldn't figure it out. Her head spun from the vivid images Snape had shared over the past hour. Hana didn't think she could ever look straight at Lucius Malfoy again.
Snape regarded her coolly. She had displayed remarkable control, not interrupting once. It gratified him in some small way, to at least have a willing audience.
"What is the point of telling me all this Severus?" she finally asked, breaking the silence that had comfortably claimed them.
"To make sure you know exactly what I am, so that you don't feel any misguided guilt or affection."
"And why would I feel the need for that?"
"It's not so easy to hurt someone else with complete dispassion." His dark eyes burned.
"You're looking for me to hurt you."
"Isn't that obvious?"
She debated with herself for a moment before approaching him. Snape stayed perfectly still, even when he fingers trailed down the side of his face. She wondered what was behind the brief flash of horror in his eyes when she touched him.
The harsh crack of her hand against his face echoed in the chamber. Blood welled up from the tear in the soft skin of his lip, and spattered the desk when she struck him again, a forceful backhand that jerked his head sideways. In the seconds of echoes and silence, Snape closed his eyes.
"At least you don't go in for a lot of foolish wand waving," he muttered. Snape bit down hard on his bleeding lip as Hooch's fingers tangled in his hair and roughly jerked his head back.
"If I didn't think Dumbledore would mind, I would gladly castrate you right now."
"I know," whispered Severus.