Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon, or anything of worth, so your suing efforts would be useless, ha! Useless I say! No seriously, I'm not out to make any money, just have fun. (and surely that's not against the law is it?)
Warning: Shounen-ai/Shoujo-ai. That is Male/Male and Female/Female romances. For the sanity of everyone involved, please don't bother to read something which will just disgust you if you don't like that sort of thing. Roll call: Taito/YamaTai (I don't care who's the seme or uke, and none of these couples seem like they'd have really strict roles, anyway. so writing one name is easier), Jyoushirou, Takori, Hiyako, Mira, Kensuke
***
Chap. 3: Conclusions
***
"So you're saying that the devices attune to genetic codes or the like? Isn't that kind of ridiculous?"
"How would they have any access to that sort of thing? Is there some type of imprinting technology in them?"
"In actuality, our theories on how the digivices function are quite vague. For instance, we're still unsure of how they draw power from us to allow our partners to digivolve, or indeed, how they keep track of us at all. Personally, I think it makes sense to assume that concerning our digimon, each of us has specific data associations with the overlaying digital world, and the formation of the digivices as well as our relations to digital manifestations such as the crests or the digimentals is encapsulated with that data, meaning that like an object with its members, the private elements aren't available for foreign use, with the exception of friends or similar entities with imperfect access..." Koushirou trailed off as he intercepted Taichi's intense glare. Their fearless leader looked to be deep in thought, contemplating a strategy to bypass the hardware limitations.
The room was silent as Taichi pronounced his conclusion. "That leads me to believe, that when you assume such things," he paused to nod his head gravely. Panning his gaze so as to meet everyone's eyes, he finished, "it makes asses of you and me." In the next moment Taichi found himself wondering why everyone had suddenly fallen to the floor. All the techno babble crap made his head want to explode... He thought it might be a relief from the horrible feeling racking his entire body.
Fear. He'd be damned if he'd let that emotion rule him. Taichi had thought he'd overcome the fear of losing Yamato when he'd resolved tonight to tell the other boy about his true feelings, ready to take a risk for the possibility of the gain. He couldn't imagine living his life behind such strong cowardice. But this was worse, so much worse, the all-consuming emptiness brought on by the thought of never being near Yamato again, and the helplessness in thinking that there was nothing he could do.
It just wasn't right! If he took things into his own hands, if he kept fear in his oblivion, there was nothing that could stop him! There wasn't supposed to be anything that could stop him...
"Why don't we just crack open the damn thing a find out that way!" he exclaimed frustratedly, as he began tightening his grip around the digivice in question. He hadn't let go of it since he'd discovered Yamato's fate.
"NO!" came shouts of reply from the rest of the party. He didn't care, nothing was supposed to keep him from Yamato, and he'd make that way if he had to! Shooting to his feet, he raised his arm, ready to dash the gadget full force onto the floor. A mad rush mobilized all around him, entrapping the others in their own horror and confusion. Even as they all moved, in that second before he could throw down his arm, it seemed that no one would draw close enough to stop his madness.
Until a steady hand caught his in a firm, though not forceful grip. Taichi fell slack as he blinked back to attention, face to face with Kido Jyou.
Slowly, they backed away from each other as Jyou released the other boy's arm, gently taking the digivice from him to examine it.
Taichi stood his ground a few feet distant, but held his head down in his hands, as if too ashamed to raise his eyes.
"Taichi-kun," Jyou began. There was no discernable response from the other. "I think we all understand how you feel. We all have things," he cleared his throat, "people, we can't bear to lose." Still, nothing.
Deciding that his friend was in worse shape than the digivice, Jyou focused his efforts on the boy. "You're strong. You're not used to feeling useless, to thinking there's nothing you can do. I know you're fearless," Taichi began shaking his head, no.
"You'd be willing to do anything, anything to get him back, I know it Taichi, you're strong, and you're brave." Taichi's denials only seemed to become more forceful.
"You're wrong." Taichi bit back suddenly, as he snapped his gaze directly on Jyou. Whispering, he continued, "I'm... afraid. I'm so scared..." He quickly looked away, catching glimpses of the others who were back to bustling around Yamato's computer in the other room. They'd left him with Jyou for counsel.
Jyou smiled self-deprecatingly. "I know better than anyone else what its like to feel helpless and afraid Taichi, so trust me when I say, there's always something you can do. Something we need you to do." He paused within the flow of his speech, trying to ensure his next words had impact, trying to push back the despair and hunger in Taichi.
"Have faith."
"How can you even say that? I'm gonna make damn sure you guys get me to Yama or else I'll, I'll..." The flare of anger continued to smolder within Taichi, even as he lost his articulation.
"The future doesn't depend on just one person Taichi. When we can rely on each other for support, we all become that much stronger. I'm asking you to believe that together, all of us will be able to find Yamato and bring him back."
Jyou watched as the firebrand struggled to clamp down his mouth, letting him finish.
"You love him. Please, be responsible to yourself and him, and admit that you don't need, or want, to stay alone. There is no better reason."
Taichi remembered the warmth and exhilaration he'd felt earlier in the night at the thought of putting his heart in Yamato's hands, and began to feel the emptiness bleed out of him. Resolving himself, he struggled to banish the vision of his hands reaching out towards a love beyond his reach, of his dreams splintering in his grasp like the digivice in the throttle of his wrath and grief. Nodding slightly to the older boy, he tried again, "I... He... What I mean is, you're right... Thanks Jyou. As long as I can trust everyone, even if I can't do something by myself, there's always a way."
Closing distance between them, Jyou placed the digivice back into Taichi's hand. "Let's go."
Taichi grinned back gratefully, proclaiming, "All right everybody, we're gonna get him back!" as he proceeded into the room where the others had gathered.
Jyou trailed behind, walking over to where Koushirou was huddled, toiling busily in front of the computer. Feeling a surge of sympathetic anxiety, he leaned forward and slipped an arm around his beloved, glad of the contact, scent, just of his very presence. "So, how's it going?" he questioned, not willing to relinquish his position at the moment.
"We still have a bit of a ways to go, but it's progressing as well as could be expected." Koushirou replied distractedly.
Squeezing the boy's shoulders under his arm Jyou murmured more to himself than anything, "Good, we're counting on you..."
Unexpectedly, he was rewarded with a beautifully slow dawning smile that tugged on his heart, warming with what belonged to Koushirou and himself, and chilling for what was still lost to Taichi.
***
"You've /got/ to be kidding!!!"
"Nope."
Tachiko spared a moment to bash the blond on the head with a nearby pillow. Despite the ruffling his precious coif received, Yamato held firm to his statement.
"You're sooo lying! That guy can so not be me. Sure he's cute enough and all, but well, he's a he! Definitely a he."
"I'm telling you, where I come from, that's you, Yagami Taichi. Dude, its not like you're the only one either. Check out the rest of the picture, I think you'll notice some familiar faces..."
"What?" Tachiko snatched the picture out of his grasp and proceeded to scrutinize all of the digidestined intently. Quietly occupying his space on the bed beside the flabbergasted girl, Yamato tried not to look too amused as her face contorted in amazement and horror.
"Holy shit!"
"Now you know exactly how I felt the first time I saw you!"
She swiveled toward him slowly, holding up the picture in one hand and pointing to Hikari incredulously. 'Hikaru?' she mouthed incredulously.
"Hikari." he deadpanned, nodding his head knowingly. "Your little sister." If possible, her jaw dropped further. She looked back at the picture, then in his direction again, then back at the picture, back to him, speeding up until she shook with the repetitive movement.
He laid an arm across her shoulders comfortingly, and carefully indicated each person on the picture, reciting names.
He started with all the ones that would be familiar, until his finger lingered on Taichi's image.
"Tai." Feeling a sudden burning gathering behind his eyes, he tore his gaze away and continued, trying to ease her into the unfamiliar territory.
Once again, he declared "Hikari," as he passed the girl's image. "Sora, Koushirou, Daisuke, Iori..." he trailed off as he put a name to the last face. With each word her eyes grew wider. Not moving his arm as he had leaned in to trace the picture, he now realized their extreme proximity, drawn out by her stunned silence. For several moments, neither of them moved, she in shock, he in indecision.
Suddenly she turned to him urgently, grasping randomly on the fabric of his shirtfront and tugging perfunctorily, looking like a million streams of questions played through her mind while not a whisper came out of her mouth. She took a sharp intake of breath.
In a moment, a rush of sound conquered her as her face melted into helpless mirth. She laughed so hard that it drove the air out of her, and finally she leaned heavily into his shoulder gasping for breath, still shaking in uncontainable reaction.
Unconsciously, he drew his arms around her more tightly and waited until she could speak. Looking up at him, her smile so wide, her teeth gleaming bright, her lively bronze amber eyes, the softness of her dark hair against his skin, made him ache.
His heart was so full of Taichi it ached. His mind was ablaze with warm cocoa smiles, deft calloused hands, smooth tight planes of muscle, and the fresh scent of sunlight, wind, and grass. His arms held firm against soft female flesh. And he liked Tachiko so much.
But he loved her not. She was in so many senses the same, she shared the essence of the man Yamato loved, but he could not love her in the same way. No more than if he ever fell in love again could he love someone new in the same way as he did his Taichi. Not even if he met an alternate version of Taichi as a man could it ever be the same. The way he loved the man he'd known for so long could not be replaced, and nor could the man himself. He could try to find a new love, he could fall for this girl, but it wouldn't be like loving Taichi, and he knew that it was no justice to himself or to her if he loved her pretending that she was someone else.
He drew her in even closer and held her tightly, irrationally happy at his conviction. He didn't love her, and he loved a man who didn't love him, and thinking about it made him so happy. Thinking about his love made him happy. In a world where things felt so different, in a world of uncertainty like the digital world, in his own cruel world where he would be alone, he felt his love holding fast like an anchor, and as long as he held that connection, he would never be lost.
"Whoa, whoa man," Tachiko managed to croak at him, pushing away gently. "I know I'm probably a lot like him, but I don't think it works that way." Yamato drew back from his cocoon of jubilation to stare at her, surprised. "What are you talking about?" he asked, genuinely puzzled.
She slipped from his embrace and they returned to being seated side by side on the edge of her bed, somewhat awkwardly. Looking around and deliberately not meeting his eyes, she continued, "I guess I know now why I feel like super comfortable around you and stuff, and technically you could probably say we're the same person... but it ain't right. It's him isn't it? You should wait for him..." She shook her head and beamed at him. "Man, I guess it really is true that the good ones are all taken or gay."
"What? No, I..." he trailed off, stopping himself from denying it. If he wanted to keep even his friendship with Taichi he knew he had to be honest and he had never felt less ashamed of his feelings. He would never be ashamed again. He gazed at her searchingly and restarted his reply, "I don't know how you knew, but... you're right. I am gay. I love... Taichi..." He exhaled, feeling free to love, feeling his heart race in the joy he found in Taichi.
"I'm sorry if I mislead you." His eyes shadowed in pain as he continued, "I love him, but, well, he doesn't feel the same way." Images of Taichi's happy face as he talked to Sora of his love flashed through Yamato's mind. "I ended up here, and I was so confused especially when you showed up, so much like him... and I, I thought I could fix things by trying to be 'a normal guy', but I was wrong. I'm sorry that I used you as a crutch."
"No sweat man, dude, I think if I had as much time around you as this guy, I would've fallen for you hard. There's no helping teenagers being morons about relationships is there?"
"So, you're really okay with this? I mean if it was me, and I found out that someone loved my altraverse incarnation of the opposite sex, I would be pretty freaked out. Plus, the fact that I, you know, like men doesn't bother you?"
"Why should it make a difference? I really like you man, and if that guy is anything like me, than its hard to see how he wouldn't too. So you find guys attractive, big deal, so do I. I don't think you can choose if you like a guy any more than I can just because you're male. When you're attracted to someone, I don't think there's any control over that, but whether or not you fall in love with a person has to do with who they are overall, and not just their sex. Seeing you and your friends actually makes me feel kind of good, you know, like if two hearts are meant for each other, they won't let something like gender get in the way. I know that I'm not him, and that's why its not like the two of us are in love, and not just because I'm not /a/ him. I didn't grow up with you, I don't have a little sister, I don't get sucked into computers, you know, that kinda thing. We just met! It's not like I think you'd be in love with me even if I was a guy, anymore than I can say I'm in love with you! Geez what do you take me for?" she teased him, ending her rant. "Dude, when you told me about this alternate universe thing, I didn't think the conversation could get any weirder, but I was wrong!"
"Hey, what do you mean about my friends? Did I forget to mention that Taichi and Sora are probably going to start dating?" Yamato questioned, relieved that she had taken his preferences with an open mind.
"Ewww, Sorata-kun? I wouldn't want to date him! Can you say, booooring. Besides, if that's true, why's this Tai character letting you get away with a hand on his ass in the picture anyway? Not to mention the other homoerotic groping going on in this snapshot. I can't believe you carry this around in your wallet man." Tachiko went back to pointing at his picture.
"Look, just because things are a certain way here, doesn't mean its the same back where I come from, I thought the gender switched thing would've made that obvious. So I like Tai. Maybe I used to try to cop feels on him in fights, but that's it." Yamato admitted ruefully. "As far as I know, there's nothing else going on between any of us, well other than the Tai and Sora thing."
"You males can be so dim when it comes to romance. C'mon, check out Jyou and the redhead guy arm in arm, its sweet, just like him and Kyouko-chan." Tachiko countered.
"Nuh-uh." Yamato replied succinctly.
"Oh yeah, well, look your little brother's got his arm around the kid with green eyes just like Shiori-chan's from their building."
"What the? Takeru and Iori, you're crazy. What about the chicks huh?"
"I mean, he's my brother and all, which makes it kinda weird, but see, look, the girl version of him is so holding hands with Miyako-chan."
In happy leeriness of his straight view of all his friends, Yamato kept up the questions. "Okay then, what do you say about Mimi and Sora-chan, here, the girl with orange hair."
"If I'm not mistaken that's her arm around Mimi's waist, not to mention that Mimi's leaning her head on the girl's shoulder!"
"You are so reading into this! IT'S FUN!" It was nice to think of the possible that Tai and Sora weren't together...
"See, I think Sora-kun and Mimi-chan make such a cute couple. So do Ken and Suka-chan. The kid with goggles is her? Wow, he's sitting on Ken's lap!"
Yamato laughed, but had to agree, "Oh well, I have to concede that one. Maybe my 'dar is on the fritz."
"Dude, your gaydar sucks!"
They continued their banter like old friends, he, resolving to find a way back to home and Taichi and to find happiness his own way, and she, promising herself to look up /Takaishi/ Yamato, who hopefully liked funny direct brunette /women/!
***
"I think we might almost have it!" Koushirou exclaimed. He waved Miyako, Jyou, and Iori over, who were helping him with most of the technical details. Taichi, Sora, Hikari and Takeru watched unobtrusively, gathered a few feet away.
"How about if we try this? I don't know why the tracking program isn't working." Miyako stated, pressing buttons on the computer and digivice simultaneously. The tech corps crowded closer to the screen viewing the reactions. Meanwhile, Hikari held up a tray she'd brought in from the kitchen. "I wonder if they want any of these cookies?"
"Not now Hikari!" Taichi shushed her. "They might figure out how to find Yama any moment now." Glancing back at the cookies, he added, "Hey, give me one though, will you." Hikari grumbled but acquiesced, and the rest of them began to help themselves.
"Oh, Mimi-chan loves these! She sends them to like everybody. I bet that's how Yamato got Girl Scout cookies..."
"Really? These are Miyako's favorite too. I think it's the caramel..."
Takeru, who had grabbed a handful of cookies, stealthily avoided Taichi's glare to make his way over to the group at the computer. Tapping his brown haired friend on the shoulder, he quietly offered, "Hey, Iori-kun, hungry?"
Iori, who had been manipulating various functions on the digivice while the others attended to the computer, turned to him immediately. Resisting the urge to smile helplessly at his blond benefactor, Iori instead blathered, "Of course, I would love some of your sweets Takeru-san." He gasped nervously noting as Takeru raised an eyebrow. "Treats, snacks, er, food, I mean, uh..."
Takeru chuckled, extending his offering to the other boy, "Have some nookie." he remarked cheerfully. "Cookie, cookie I mean!!!" he corrected in sudden alarm. He grasped Iori's hands in his own, pressing the cookies into them. Their hands tangled together and Takeru finally managed to exchange the cookies, but came away grasping the digivice tightly in his confusion.
A green light began emanating from Takeru's digivice, suffusing the area between their hands with an ethereal glow. The machine began to palpitate wildly, and a bright beam launched out of it, tracing its way to Yamato's computer. On screen, Koushirou's tracking program began blinking green. They had a match!
Koushirou jumped to the screen to confirm the findings, as the others rushed over.
"What happened!?" Taichi demanded.
"We've found him!" Jyou exclaimed. "He's not in the digital world, but with this link, I think we can manage to send someone after him." Jyou clapped Taichi on the back happily. "We did it."
"Isn't this great Taichi!" Sora joined Jyou and hugged her friend who looked ready to jump into the computer screen in excitement.
"I'm ready." was the most he could say, almost overwhelmed.
"Takeru-san's DNA must have helped his digivice interface with the program to find traces of Yamato's path!" Iori theorized. Turning to the older boy in a parallel to their earlier gesture, he closed his hands over Takeru's and cautioned, "You can't let go of the digivice now. It might be the only way we can get your brother back." Takeru nodded solemnly eyeing their clasped hands.
Koushirou continued for them, as they seemed distracted. "If Takeru keeps the link path open on this side, we can send someone to pinpoint Yamato's position in the particular continuum he's landed in, and then transmit both parties back on the frequencies maintained here. We can trace Yamato with Takeru's digivice, but to send the other person, we have to use a similar configuration on another digivice and keep it connected by the same DNA principle. Since we don't have any other pairs of siblings here, we're going to have to send either Hikari or Taichi."
Miyako grinned the grin of a matchmaker who'd just found the perfect setup. And she had.
Clapping her hands and rubbing them together, she declaimed, "Okay Hikari-chan, get your cute little butt over here and let me reconfigure your digivice so we can send your brother to fetch his lover boy. And while you're at it, bring me a cookie woman." The entire room was silent as this last earned her an irate glare from her girlfriend.
"Hey! Takeru and Iori have been flirting mercilessly all day, thanks to me I might add, and I do not see why they should get to have all the fun!"
***
Yamato and Tachiko were still huddled together on the bed, speculating amusingly when Takeru, Hikaru, and Miyako burst into the room loudly. They scrambled to conceal Yamato's photo from the others.
"'niisan, ewww, she's my best friend's sister!"
"What are you doing with my sister!"
"I have to sleep on that mattress you know!"
Three voices exclaimed in unison.
"You children have sick sick minds." Tachiko scolded, as she and Yamato put some space between them.
"So seriously though, what were you guys doing?" Takeru was looking at Yamato in an uncomfortable way. There had been something bothering Yamato all day, and Takeru wanted to know what it was. After all, Yamato had showed up in the middle of the night, was having memory problems, and he seemed so out of it.
Yamato looked at the boy who was not exactly his little brother, and sighed. He probably owed the kid an explanation, especially if he was going to try to get back home. "Look, Takeru, I think we need to talk..."
"Okay kiddies, lets get out of here, let the brothers have some privacy and all," Tachiko started, as she got up and began ushering Hikaru and Miyako out.
Looking up, Yamato caught her eye, saying, "Actually, I'd appreciate it if you stayed, Tachiko."
That seemed to bring a bit of a rise out of them all, but Tachiko agreed warily. "I'd be glad to." Turning back to her brother, she continued, "But you two are out of here."
"Aw, come on, this is the good part!" Miyako entreated to no avail.
"Hikaru," Tachiko warned menacingly.
"Right." Hikaru scooped up his protesting beloved and bore her out of the room. Yamato winced as he heard her parting echo, "Maybe they'll elope!" Hikaru laughed after her, while those remaining inside the room sighed.
"So I'm assuming that this is /not/ about you and Tachiko eloping 'niisan, though you do seem to have," Takeru winked mischievously, "hit it off..." Sobering slightly, he added, "Look, is there something wrong? Are you having problems with Mom or something? You don't seem to be yourself..."
"Listen, Takeru, I know this is going to sound crazy, but I need you to believe me." He paused to clear his throat. "I'm not who you think I am. My name is Ishida Yamato, and I come from a parallel universe. Tachiko already found this out before, and I was wondering if you two could help cover for me until I find a way to get home." Yamato knew that being so blunt was making him come off as a lunatic, but for the life of him, he couldn't come up with another approach. He was running out of time! Takaishi Yamato had bought him another day or so, but without Takeru's cooperation, there would be no way to hide 2 Yamato's from their father... He looked grimly over at Tachiko, who was seated at the nearby computer desk, to corroborate.
Before she could get in a word, Takeru replied, looking angry, "I don't know what this is about, 'niisan, but if you two are having problems, you don't have to pretend you're someone else. No matter what, we're still family and that means you can trust me, and trust mom too! I'm sure whatever it is, she's trying her best to relate, I mean its just both of you can be so stubborn!"
"Takeru!"
"Yamato-kun, he's right! You should really tell him the truth about all of this." Tachiko cut in.
"What?" Yamato replied, getting a sinking feeling she was about launch into another elaborate Tai-esque scheme. He moved closer to her in an effort to discern exactly what she had in mind, but all she gave him was a desperate look to play along.
"Fine, if you won't tell him, then I have to. Takeru-kun, the truth is, your brother was afraid to tell you because he didn't know how you'd react, but I caught him earlier checking out guys and I've been trying to convince him to talk to you all day. He's gay Takeru, and he was afraid you might hate him if he told you, but I think you should know."
Takeru looked hushed, though sympathetic. "Oh, wow, 'niisan, really? I, I never would have thought... I mean, I don't know if I understand, but I do know, that you're my brother, and it doesn't matter who you love, its just, er..." he fidgeted in place, "I could never hate you 'niisan, but, it is kind of a shock you know. And I always, always thought that you would hit it off great with Tachiko-san, but maybe I was wrong..." he stopped babbling brokenly, but did offer him a genuine look of acceptance.
Yamato took the time to give Tachiko an evil glare before turning to Takeru, smiling weakly. "Yeah, that's right... I'm gay. Well, uh, sometimes I feel like there's two of me, um, the real me, and the me the rest of this world knows..." he finished, resigned to playing a part in another twisted Yagami plan. He looked back to Tachiko, and his spirits danced between being buoyed by the look of protective confidence on her face, that she could help him out of this, and the sinking shadow of longing to see another carefree face painted with strength and gallantry. 'I miss you Taichi.' he projected into the ether, across the dimensions, into the heart of his beloved, knowing it could never reach. He smiled at his goofy new friend, who was trying to help him as best she could, and put his hand on her shoulder. They faced Takeru together, their backs towards her computer, in a unified front supporting this warped new back-story.
Meanwhile, Tachiko's monitor began glowing while obscure figures raced across the screen, and Takeru, with eyes wide and mouth open, began staring at it in concern. Yamato started to turn towards the screen to figure out what was going on, but was too late to brace himself for the oncoming event. In a blinding flash of light the room seemed to disappear, and the world felt like it was exploding around him. A large mass came hurtling impossibly out of the screen, colliding directly into the two people in front of it. Yamato bore the brunt of the impact, half catching the object in his arms, as it drove him to the ground and snagged Tachiko on their way down.
When their vision cleared, Yamato found himself lying on his back next to Tachiko, who had gone face first into the carpet of the bedroom floor. Takeru ran up to them, and was kneeling beside them to make sure they were all right. With one arm thrown across Tachiko, and the rest of him nestled for the most part deep within Yamato's embrace, Taichi shook off the dazed stupor that had gripped him on his rough journey to this place, and grinned haplessly at the object of his quest beneath him.
"Is it really you?" he asked, though staring into blue eyes dark with emotion, he knew the answer. Taichi buried his face in Yamato's shoulder, unable to stem the tears that fell, and murmured softly to the one he'd waited for, "I'm so glad I found you. You don't know how much..."
For once scorning consequence, Yamato savored the unexpected reunion, drawing his arms tight around the boy, reveling in the solid heavy warmth of his touch and the tickling sweep of lush hair across his face, telling him it was all true. This was Taichi, who'd come for him across worlds, and despite everything, the moment was perfect and unforgettable, as Yamato held his love. It was a moment that was not shattered, even as Takeru uttered in brave awe, "I believe you 'niisan. About the other universe and about him, I believe you."
***
"Well, I hate to break up such a loverly scene, but you think you guys could kindly, get the hell off of me!!!" Tachiko growled, her voice muffled into the ground.
Yamato reluctantly loosened his arms, while Taichi scrambled up quickly, dusting himself off and wiping at his eyes. Helping Tachiko up as he rose, Yamato watched in amusement as Takeru thoroughly examined their new arrival. Meanwhile, Tachiko finally managed to regain her bearings, and set her own sights on the remarkably familiar looking young man.
"Look, Takeru, would you knock it off already." Tai pleaded with his inquisitor, forgetting his alien situation. "I've just gotta get Yama... oh yeah, sorry, you... don't seem to know me..." he sighed in embarrassed frustration. Yamato wanted to embrace him again, but restrained himself.
Takeru, a bit taken aback rushed back over to Yamato and Tachiko, exclaiming, "'niisan, he knows me! Have you ever traveled through a computer too?" Taichi squirmed slightly under this anxious glance, and even more as Tachiko blatantly appraised him.
She advanced, introducing herself. "Yagami Taichi I presume. Nice to meet you. My name's Yagami Tachiko. I'm you in this universe." He looked surprised, but after a moment of looking her over, nodded approvingly.
"Well, this is an unexpected pleasure. It's nice to know that our boy Yama keeps himself in good company. Thanks for taking care of him." he inclined his head in a polite bow. When he turned his attention back on Yamato, it was with burning eyes, full of anger, triumph, and something else that Yama couldn't classify. The last time he'd seen Taichi was in the wake of his heartbreak over witnessing Tai's confession to Sora, and there was part of him that wanted to scream, to make Tai feel a little of what he felt, to make Tai feel anything for him.
Seeing him again made him want so many things, and all the memories welled up in an urge to cry or to lash out, as he had failed in expressing himself to Taichi so many times. But inside of him, all that he could find was love, and hurt, that Taichi could never feel the same. Adrift in his raging emotions, it was all Yamato could do to stand rooted and silent, stony faced as always in his spot, feet away from someone he so wanted to touch, but could never reach.
In the long breathless moment, Taichi's gaze softened, and he asked simply, in his own hurt, "Why did you run away from me?" It was not what he had meant to say. But it escaped him anyway in lieu of more cheap bravado.
Yamato could not answer. 'Because I love you.' he thought. He said nothing.
Tachiko glared at the blond boy in disbelieving exasperation. He had just less than half an hour ago confessed his love for this same 'Taichi', to her no less! It was more idiocy than she would allow. Granted, she was not in the throes of a passionate unrequited (?) love, but she decided to push the envelope a little.
Nudging her counterpart none to gently, she proceeded prod the boys with words, "Go to him. He's been waiting for you. He needs you to take him home." Broken from his near hypnotic focus on Yamato, Taichi regarded her with grateful amazement.
"You're right, what was I thinking?" he asked her, before sauntering over to Yamato and taking his hand. "I'm not afraid of anything." he recited, mostly to himself. Positioning them in front of the computer, he turned back to thank her one last time. "Anyone ever tell you you're a genius babe? And a knockout to boot." he winked at her amiably. "Thanks for everything."
Yamato himself came back to attention enough to echo this. "Yes, thank you so much Tachiko. You've helped me a lot."
Grinning in response, she replied, "Just don't let my good advice go to waste mister." She mimicked Taichi's wink. "Wouldn't want that handsome friend of yours going to all this trouble for nothing."
Blushing pink, Yamato allowed her the jibe, and answered sincerely, "I promise you I won't. Really, thank you, and it was great to meet you. You're a great friend. And take some of your own advice to heart. I'm sure the right one is waiting just around the bend." In a final gesture of parting, he raised her hand to mouth, brushing it gently with his lips. "Farewell, and good luck." He did not notice Taichi go red behind him.
Taichi, his throat strangely dry, yanked Yamato's other hand, which he had yet to release in haste. He heard his own voice crack slightly as he barked, "OK time to go, digiport open!" Before either could move again, the computer monitor beamed a light, engulfing the two boys, and sending them into the varying data stream, out of this universe for good.
Tachiko and Takeru stood for a time in the aftermath, until Takeru, who had spent most of the strange encounter silent and puzzled, demanded, "You are going to explain this to me."
"What's to explain? We told you everything. That wasn't your brother, it was an altraverse Yamato, who also happens to be gay. That other guy was his boyfriend Taichi, who I'm pretty sure equates to me in their world."
"You call that an explanation?"
"I'll clear it up for you if you promise me something."
"Sure, whatever."
"Introduce me to your brother this weekend."
"Um, didn't you say he was gay?"
"Hey, I think it's worth a try. Apparently I'm his type."
"Oh, brother."
***
It was surreal, like an out of body experience. Yamato knew they were data, but within the stream, it was almost like their physical experience was being magnified.
Floating along two parallel beams of light, one pink, one green, they drifted towards their unseen home world, dragging backwards in twists and turns that seemed so easy to be lost in, occasionally buffeted by gusts of what felt like wind, hanging on for dear life.
And through it all, Taichi never let go of his hand. Yamato thought back to so many years ago, when he had joined Taichi to battle Diablomon within the net. He could feel Taichi's heart. Or maybe it was his own, pulsing quickly in panic, in joy.
It was a swim. It was a dream. The dual haze of two minds in conjunction with the extremely visceral reality of their surroundings, the touches, the smells, the visions, all leaping at them, imprinting vividly, was like reliving the moments when their consciousness had merged, when their heart had become one. And this again, was what Yamato craved more than anything.
'It reminds me of...' he caught a wisp of his partner's thoughts. Looking sharply back at Yamato, it seemed that Taichi had sensed the intrusion.
'You can hear me?'
'Yes, I can.' Yamato could feel Taichi's shock at the statement, and even more mysteriously, a touch of anxiety, yet his answer resounded to both them.
'Good. I can feel you too.'
Yamato once again found himself amazed by how simply Taichi could comfort him, and envied his frankness.
'What? I didn't quite catch that Yama. It was like you almost said something to me, then stopped...'
Clamping down on his fancy, Yamato knew a slip in that department might only cause grief and confusion at the moment. He would tell Taichi when this was over.
'I just wanted to know how you found me.'
'Oh.' Had he just felt Taichi's disappointment? 'Just, when we couldn't find you, me and Sora called like the whole gang and tracked you down through the computer. We used Takeru's DNA through the digivice to get a lock on your location.'
'So, what did you and Sora decide anyway?' he filtered through, trying to hide traces of bitterness.
'What?!' Yamato nearly reeled in the backlash of shock sent at him. Still he knew, since he'd started things, he would have to push on. There really was no hiding anything from Taichi here. 'I saw you two talking before. I heard you confess. I,' raw emotion began over bleeding his thoughts here, and he had to regroup himself to continue. 'I want you to be happy...'
'You knew then? Happy? Do you know how happy I at just the fact that you know how much I love you! It's stupid, I know, but I was so scared to tell you. God, even if I don't mean anything to you, it's almost enough that you know, and... you don't hate me... Yamato...!'
Taichi's spectral body moved to embrace him, enveloping and tangling together their spirits, and there was no flesh, but as he was alive, Yamato had never felt anything like it! It was not a touch, but a rush. In that instant everything was Taichi, the world distilled in a single stunning blow.
Things began to turn and fade, reality spinning and compressing, pushing them back into the realm of man. They were flying and falling and through it all, Taichi held him, and he felt complete.
***
This time, it was he who landed in Taichi's arms.
Here, everything was perfect. Yamato had never felt happier in his entire life, and could not imagine any happiness beyond this.
"I love you." Taichi repeated longingly sweet into his ear. Yama felt even happier already, never more glad to be proven wrong.
His heart felt fit to burst. Lying cradled in Taichi's embrace, he wrapped his arms tightly around the other boy. Indulging for a moment, resting his head against his beloved's chest. He could feel the rumble vibration as Taichi spoke.
"Never leave me again. I need you Yamato. You're the only one I dream of, and next to you, I burn with life. Without you, I have no balance, Yamato, without you, I'm not whole. I love you. I never want to let you go. I never want to spend one day away from you. I want us to be together. I'm sorry if I'm being selfish. I could never wish you any pain, but I need you to know, exactly how I feel." Yamato felt the shudder of fear running through Taichi beneath him.
Slowly, Yamato drew himself over his partner, so he could look down into the boy's face. Gently he reached out, cupping Taichi's chin in his hand, dropping his gaze to meet directly with Taichi's eyes. Struggling with clarity and emotion, Yamato felt his eyes tearing up, water seeping thinly from their corners, carving lines across his cheeks before dropping soundlessly onto Taichi's face below.
"You're wonderful Taichi. And I've loved you for a long time." Closing his eyes fully, he let more tears drop until he could hold back no longer, grasping Taichi to him tightly. He breathed in Taichi's scent deeply, melting into his love's arms as they clasped around him, pressing their lips together in sweet harmony, their hearts finally in perfect accord.
They were oblivious as around them, the other children hurried to make privacy. Jyou and Koushirou left hand in hand ready to return to their quiet evening together. Sora helped usher the tired younger generation out, contemplating placing a long call to a certain someone across the ocean. After her exertion maintaining cross-dimensional links, Hikari didn't mind when Miyako insisted on walking her home. Meanwhile, Iori offered to treat Takeru to some ice cream to help him regain his strength, and perhaps find Ken or Daisuke to hang out with, though they would likely come as a pair. To all this, Yamato and Taichi paid no heed, thoroughly enchanted in their own wonderland.
***
A/N: just in time for V-day, a lovely piece of sap. well, it was fun anyway, if a bit heavy handed. i gave in to the mush, i couldn't help myself. Wow, this is the first i've ever finished (and might be the only one...) Yay for taito fluff! anyway, i know this last chap was particularly bad, but tai and yama just deserve a cutesy ending... i actually named this fic after clamp's miyuki-chan in wonderland (not alice, go figure, wait, no, i'm just an anime obsessed moron...) but most of the allusion credit for this one should go to koko wa greenwood! for suka-chan (i couldn't resist!) and the idea of a sex changed universe. ha, michiru and shinobu, ha! anyway, here's lookin' at you kid. thanks for your support
Warning: Shounen-ai/Shoujo-ai. That is Male/Male and Female/Female romances. For the sanity of everyone involved, please don't bother to read something which will just disgust you if you don't like that sort of thing. Roll call: Taito/YamaTai (I don't care who's the seme or uke, and none of these couples seem like they'd have really strict roles, anyway. so writing one name is easier), Jyoushirou, Takori, Hiyako, Mira, Kensuke
***
Chap. 3: Conclusions
***
"So you're saying that the devices attune to genetic codes or the like? Isn't that kind of ridiculous?"
"How would they have any access to that sort of thing? Is there some type of imprinting technology in them?"
"In actuality, our theories on how the digivices function are quite vague. For instance, we're still unsure of how they draw power from us to allow our partners to digivolve, or indeed, how they keep track of us at all. Personally, I think it makes sense to assume that concerning our digimon, each of us has specific data associations with the overlaying digital world, and the formation of the digivices as well as our relations to digital manifestations such as the crests or the digimentals is encapsulated with that data, meaning that like an object with its members, the private elements aren't available for foreign use, with the exception of friends or similar entities with imperfect access..." Koushirou trailed off as he intercepted Taichi's intense glare. Their fearless leader looked to be deep in thought, contemplating a strategy to bypass the hardware limitations.
The room was silent as Taichi pronounced his conclusion. "That leads me to believe, that when you assume such things," he paused to nod his head gravely. Panning his gaze so as to meet everyone's eyes, he finished, "it makes asses of you and me." In the next moment Taichi found himself wondering why everyone had suddenly fallen to the floor. All the techno babble crap made his head want to explode... He thought it might be a relief from the horrible feeling racking his entire body.
Fear. He'd be damned if he'd let that emotion rule him. Taichi had thought he'd overcome the fear of losing Yamato when he'd resolved tonight to tell the other boy about his true feelings, ready to take a risk for the possibility of the gain. He couldn't imagine living his life behind such strong cowardice. But this was worse, so much worse, the all-consuming emptiness brought on by the thought of never being near Yamato again, and the helplessness in thinking that there was nothing he could do.
It just wasn't right! If he took things into his own hands, if he kept fear in his oblivion, there was nothing that could stop him! There wasn't supposed to be anything that could stop him...
"Why don't we just crack open the damn thing a find out that way!" he exclaimed frustratedly, as he began tightening his grip around the digivice in question. He hadn't let go of it since he'd discovered Yamato's fate.
"NO!" came shouts of reply from the rest of the party. He didn't care, nothing was supposed to keep him from Yamato, and he'd make that way if he had to! Shooting to his feet, he raised his arm, ready to dash the gadget full force onto the floor. A mad rush mobilized all around him, entrapping the others in their own horror and confusion. Even as they all moved, in that second before he could throw down his arm, it seemed that no one would draw close enough to stop his madness.
Until a steady hand caught his in a firm, though not forceful grip. Taichi fell slack as he blinked back to attention, face to face with Kido Jyou.
Slowly, they backed away from each other as Jyou released the other boy's arm, gently taking the digivice from him to examine it.
Taichi stood his ground a few feet distant, but held his head down in his hands, as if too ashamed to raise his eyes.
"Taichi-kun," Jyou began. There was no discernable response from the other. "I think we all understand how you feel. We all have things," he cleared his throat, "people, we can't bear to lose." Still, nothing.
Deciding that his friend was in worse shape than the digivice, Jyou focused his efforts on the boy. "You're strong. You're not used to feeling useless, to thinking there's nothing you can do. I know you're fearless," Taichi began shaking his head, no.
"You'd be willing to do anything, anything to get him back, I know it Taichi, you're strong, and you're brave." Taichi's denials only seemed to become more forceful.
"You're wrong." Taichi bit back suddenly, as he snapped his gaze directly on Jyou. Whispering, he continued, "I'm... afraid. I'm so scared..." He quickly looked away, catching glimpses of the others who were back to bustling around Yamato's computer in the other room. They'd left him with Jyou for counsel.
Jyou smiled self-deprecatingly. "I know better than anyone else what its like to feel helpless and afraid Taichi, so trust me when I say, there's always something you can do. Something we need you to do." He paused within the flow of his speech, trying to ensure his next words had impact, trying to push back the despair and hunger in Taichi.
"Have faith."
"How can you even say that? I'm gonna make damn sure you guys get me to Yama or else I'll, I'll..." The flare of anger continued to smolder within Taichi, even as he lost his articulation.
"The future doesn't depend on just one person Taichi. When we can rely on each other for support, we all become that much stronger. I'm asking you to believe that together, all of us will be able to find Yamato and bring him back."
Jyou watched as the firebrand struggled to clamp down his mouth, letting him finish.
"You love him. Please, be responsible to yourself and him, and admit that you don't need, or want, to stay alone. There is no better reason."
Taichi remembered the warmth and exhilaration he'd felt earlier in the night at the thought of putting his heart in Yamato's hands, and began to feel the emptiness bleed out of him. Resolving himself, he struggled to banish the vision of his hands reaching out towards a love beyond his reach, of his dreams splintering in his grasp like the digivice in the throttle of his wrath and grief. Nodding slightly to the older boy, he tried again, "I... He... What I mean is, you're right... Thanks Jyou. As long as I can trust everyone, even if I can't do something by myself, there's always a way."
Closing distance between them, Jyou placed the digivice back into Taichi's hand. "Let's go."
Taichi grinned back gratefully, proclaiming, "All right everybody, we're gonna get him back!" as he proceeded into the room where the others had gathered.
Jyou trailed behind, walking over to where Koushirou was huddled, toiling busily in front of the computer. Feeling a surge of sympathetic anxiety, he leaned forward and slipped an arm around his beloved, glad of the contact, scent, just of his very presence. "So, how's it going?" he questioned, not willing to relinquish his position at the moment.
"We still have a bit of a ways to go, but it's progressing as well as could be expected." Koushirou replied distractedly.
Squeezing the boy's shoulders under his arm Jyou murmured more to himself than anything, "Good, we're counting on you..."
Unexpectedly, he was rewarded with a beautifully slow dawning smile that tugged on his heart, warming with what belonged to Koushirou and himself, and chilling for what was still lost to Taichi.
***
"You've /got/ to be kidding!!!"
"Nope."
Tachiko spared a moment to bash the blond on the head with a nearby pillow. Despite the ruffling his precious coif received, Yamato held firm to his statement.
"You're sooo lying! That guy can so not be me. Sure he's cute enough and all, but well, he's a he! Definitely a he."
"I'm telling you, where I come from, that's you, Yagami Taichi. Dude, its not like you're the only one either. Check out the rest of the picture, I think you'll notice some familiar faces..."
"What?" Tachiko snatched the picture out of his grasp and proceeded to scrutinize all of the digidestined intently. Quietly occupying his space on the bed beside the flabbergasted girl, Yamato tried not to look too amused as her face contorted in amazement and horror.
"Holy shit!"
"Now you know exactly how I felt the first time I saw you!"
She swiveled toward him slowly, holding up the picture in one hand and pointing to Hikari incredulously. 'Hikaru?' she mouthed incredulously.
"Hikari." he deadpanned, nodding his head knowingly. "Your little sister." If possible, her jaw dropped further. She looked back at the picture, then in his direction again, then back at the picture, back to him, speeding up until she shook with the repetitive movement.
He laid an arm across her shoulders comfortingly, and carefully indicated each person on the picture, reciting names.
He started with all the ones that would be familiar, until his finger lingered on Taichi's image.
"Tai." Feeling a sudden burning gathering behind his eyes, he tore his gaze away and continued, trying to ease her into the unfamiliar territory.
Once again, he declared "Hikari," as he passed the girl's image. "Sora, Koushirou, Daisuke, Iori..." he trailed off as he put a name to the last face. With each word her eyes grew wider. Not moving his arm as he had leaned in to trace the picture, he now realized their extreme proximity, drawn out by her stunned silence. For several moments, neither of them moved, she in shock, he in indecision.
Suddenly she turned to him urgently, grasping randomly on the fabric of his shirtfront and tugging perfunctorily, looking like a million streams of questions played through her mind while not a whisper came out of her mouth. She took a sharp intake of breath.
In a moment, a rush of sound conquered her as her face melted into helpless mirth. She laughed so hard that it drove the air out of her, and finally she leaned heavily into his shoulder gasping for breath, still shaking in uncontainable reaction.
Unconsciously, he drew his arms around her more tightly and waited until she could speak. Looking up at him, her smile so wide, her teeth gleaming bright, her lively bronze amber eyes, the softness of her dark hair against his skin, made him ache.
His heart was so full of Taichi it ached. His mind was ablaze with warm cocoa smiles, deft calloused hands, smooth tight planes of muscle, and the fresh scent of sunlight, wind, and grass. His arms held firm against soft female flesh. And he liked Tachiko so much.
But he loved her not. She was in so many senses the same, she shared the essence of the man Yamato loved, but he could not love her in the same way. No more than if he ever fell in love again could he love someone new in the same way as he did his Taichi. Not even if he met an alternate version of Taichi as a man could it ever be the same. The way he loved the man he'd known for so long could not be replaced, and nor could the man himself. He could try to find a new love, he could fall for this girl, but it wouldn't be like loving Taichi, and he knew that it was no justice to himself or to her if he loved her pretending that she was someone else.
He drew her in even closer and held her tightly, irrationally happy at his conviction. He didn't love her, and he loved a man who didn't love him, and thinking about it made him so happy. Thinking about his love made him happy. In a world where things felt so different, in a world of uncertainty like the digital world, in his own cruel world where he would be alone, he felt his love holding fast like an anchor, and as long as he held that connection, he would never be lost.
"Whoa, whoa man," Tachiko managed to croak at him, pushing away gently. "I know I'm probably a lot like him, but I don't think it works that way." Yamato drew back from his cocoon of jubilation to stare at her, surprised. "What are you talking about?" he asked, genuinely puzzled.
She slipped from his embrace and they returned to being seated side by side on the edge of her bed, somewhat awkwardly. Looking around and deliberately not meeting his eyes, she continued, "I guess I know now why I feel like super comfortable around you and stuff, and technically you could probably say we're the same person... but it ain't right. It's him isn't it? You should wait for him..." She shook her head and beamed at him. "Man, I guess it really is true that the good ones are all taken or gay."
"What? No, I..." he trailed off, stopping himself from denying it. If he wanted to keep even his friendship with Taichi he knew he had to be honest and he had never felt less ashamed of his feelings. He would never be ashamed again. He gazed at her searchingly and restarted his reply, "I don't know how you knew, but... you're right. I am gay. I love... Taichi..." He exhaled, feeling free to love, feeling his heart race in the joy he found in Taichi.
"I'm sorry if I mislead you." His eyes shadowed in pain as he continued, "I love him, but, well, he doesn't feel the same way." Images of Taichi's happy face as he talked to Sora of his love flashed through Yamato's mind. "I ended up here, and I was so confused especially when you showed up, so much like him... and I, I thought I could fix things by trying to be 'a normal guy', but I was wrong. I'm sorry that I used you as a crutch."
"No sweat man, dude, I think if I had as much time around you as this guy, I would've fallen for you hard. There's no helping teenagers being morons about relationships is there?"
"So, you're really okay with this? I mean if it was me, and I found out that someone loved my altraverse incarnation of the opposite sex, I would be pretty freaked out. Plus, the fact that I, you know, like men doesn't bother you?"
"Why should it make a difference? I really like you man, and if that guy is anything like me, than its hard to see how he wouldn't too. So you find guys attractive, big deal, so do I. I don't think you can choose if you like a guy any more than I can just because you're male. When you're attracted to someone, I don't think there's any control over that, but whether or not you fall in love with a person has to do with who they are overall, and not just their sex. Seeing you and your friends actually makes me feel kind of good, you know, like if two hearts are meant for each other, they won't let something like gender get in the way. I know that I'm not him, and that's why its not like the two of us are in love, and not just because I'm not /a/ him. I didn't grow up with you, I don't have a little sister, I don't get sucked into computers, you know, that kinda thing. We just met! It's not like I think you'd be in love with me even if I was a guy, anymore than I can say I'm in love with you! Geez what do you take me for?" she teased him, ending her rant. "Dude, when you told me about this alternate universe thing, I didn't think the conversation could get any weirder, but I was wrong!"
"Hey, what do you mean about my friends? Did I forget to mention that Taichi and Sora are probably going to start dating?" Yamato questioned, relieved that she had taken his preferences with an open mind.
"Ewww, Sorata-kun? I wouldn't want to date him! Can you say, booooring. Besides, if that's true, why's this Tai character letting you get away with a hand on his ass in the picture anyway? Not to mention the other homoerotic groping going on in this snapshot. I can't believe you carry this around in your wallet man." Tachiko went back to pointing at his picture.
"Look, just because things are a certain way here, doesn't mean its the same back where I come from, I thought the gender switched thing would've made that obvious. So I like Tai. Maybe I used to try to cop feels on him in fights, but that's it." Yamato admitted ruefully. "As far as I know, there's nothing else going on between any of us, well other than the Tai and Sora thing."
"You males can be so dim when it comes to romance. C'mon, check out Jyou and the redhead guy arm in arm, its sweet, just like him and Kyouko-chan." Tachiko countered.
"Nuh-uh." Yamato replied succinctly.
"Oh yeah, well, look your little brother's got his arm around the kid with green eyes just like Shiori-chan's from their building."
"What the? Takeru and Iori, you're crazy. What about the chicks huh?"
"I mean, he's my brother and all, which makes it kinda weird, but see, look, the girl version of him is so holding hands with Miyako-chan."
In happy leeriness of his straight view of all his friends, Yamato kept up the questions. "Okay then, what do you say about Mimi and Sora-chan, here, the girl with orange hair."
"If I'm not mistaken that's her arm around Mimi's waist, not to mention that Mimi's leaning her head on the girl's shoulder!"
"You are so reading into this! IT'S FUN!" It was nice to think of the possible that Tai and Sora weren't together...
"See, I think Sora-kun and Mimi-chan make such a cute couple. So do Ken and Suka-chan. The kid with goggles is her? Wow, he's sitting on Ken's lap!"
Yamato laughed, but had to agree, "Oh well, I have to concede that one. Maybe my 'dar is on the fritz."
"Dude, your gaydar sucks!"
They continued their banter like old friends, he, resolving to find a way back to home and Taichi and to find happiness his own way, and she, promising herself to look up /Takaishi/ Yamato, who hopefully liked funny direct brunette /women/!
***
"I think we might almost have it!" Koushirou exclaimed. He waved Miyako, Jyou, and Iori over, who were helping him with most of the technical details. Taichi, Sora, Hikari and Takeru watched unobtrusively, gathered a few feet away.
"How about if we try this? I don't know why the tracking program isn't working." Miyako stated, pressing buttons on the computer and digivice simultaneously. The tech corps crowded closer to the screen viewing the reactions. Meanwhile, Hikari held up a tray she'd brought in from the kitchen. "I wonder if they want any of these cookies?"
"Not now Hikari!" Taichi shushed her. "They might figure out how to find Yama any moment now." Glancing back at the cookies, he added, "Hey, give me one though, will you." Hikari grumbled but acquiesced, and the rest of them began to help themselves.
"Oh, Mimi-chan loves these! She sends them to like everybody. I bet that's how Yamato got Girl Scout cookies..."
"Really? These are Miyako's favorite too. I think it's the caramel..."
Takeru, who had grabbed a handful of cookies, stealthily avoided Taichi's glare to make his way over to the group at the computer. Tapping his brown haired friend on the shoulder, he quietly offered, "Hey, Iori-kun, hungry?"
Iori, who had been manipulating various functions on the digivice while the others attended to the computer, turned to him immediately. Resisting the urge to smile helplessly at his blond benefactor, Iori instead blathered, "Of course, I would love some of your sweets Takeru-san." He gasped nervously noting as Takeru raised an eyebrow. "Treats, snacks, er, food, I mean, uh..."
Takeru chuckled, extending his offering to the other boy, "Have some nookie." he remarked cheerfully. "Cookie, cookie I mean!!!" he corrected in sudden alarm. He grasped Iori's hands in his own, pressing the cookies into them. Their hands tangled together and Takeru finally managed to exchange the cookies, but came away grasping the digivice tightly in his confusion.
A green light began emanating from Takeru's digivice, suffusing the area between their hands with an ethereal glow. The machine began to palpitate wildly, and a bright beam launched out of it, tracing its way to Yamato's computer. On screen, Koushirou's tracking program began blinking green. They had a match!
Koushirou jumped to the screen to confirm the findings, as the others rushed over.
"What happened!?" Taichi demanded.
"We've found him!" Jyou exclaimed. "He's not in the digital world, but with this link, I think we can manage to send someone after him." Jyou clapped Taichi on the back happily. "We did it."
"Isn't this great Taichi!" Sora joined Jyou and hugged her friend who looked ready to jump into the computer screen in excitement.
"I'm ready." was the most he could say, almost overwhelmed.
"Takeru-san's DNA must have helped his digivice interface with the program to find traces of Yamato's path!" Iori theorized. Turning to the older boy in a parallel to their earlier gesture, he closed his hands over Takeru's and cautioned, "You can't let go of the digivice now. It might be the only way we can get your brother back." Takeru nodded solemnly eyeing their clasped hands.
Koushirou continued for them, as they seemed distracted. "If Takeru keeps the link path open on this side, we can send someone to pinpoint Yamato's position in the particular continuum he's landed in, and then transmit both parties back on the frequencies maintained here. We can trace Yamato with Takeru's digivice, but to send the other person, we have to use a similar configuration on another digivice and keep it connected by the same DNA principle. Since we don't have any other pairs of siblings here, we're going to have to send either Hikari or Taichi."
Miyako grinned the grin of a matchmaker who'd just found the perfect setup. And she had.
Clapping her hands and rubbing them together, she declaimed, "Okay Hikari-chan, get your cute little butt over here and let me reconfigure your digivice so we can send your brother to fetch his lover boy. And while you're at it, bring me a cookie woman." The entire room was silent as this last earned her an irate glare from her girlfriend.
"Hey! Takeru and Iori have been flirting mercilessly all day, thanks to me I might add, and I do not see why they should get to have all the fun!"
***
Yamato and Tachiko were still huddled together on the bed, speculating amusingly when Takeru, Hikaru, and Miyako burst into the room loudly. They scrambled to conceal Yamato's photo from the others.
"'niisan, ewww, she's my best friend's sister!"
"What are you doing with my sister!"
"I have to sleep on that mattress you know!"
Three voices exclaimed in unison.
"You children have sick sick minds." Tachiko scolded, as she and Yamato put some space between them.
"So seriously though, what were you guys doing?" Takeru was looking at Yamato in an uncomfortable way. There had been something bothering Yamato all day, and Takeru wanted to know what it was. After all, Yamato had showed up in the middle of the night, was having memory problems, and he seemed so out of it.
Yamato looked at the boy who was not exactly his little brother, and sighed. He probably owed the kid an explanation, especially if he was going to try to get back home. "Look, Takeru, I think we need to talk..."
"Okay kiddies, lets get out of here, let the brothers have some privacy and all," Tachiko started, as she got up and began ushering Hikaru and Miyako out.
Looking up, Yamato caught her eye, saying, "Actually, I'd appreciate it if you stayed, Tachiko."
That seemed to bring a bit of a rise out of them all, but Tachiko agreed warily. "I'd be glad to." Turning back to her brother, she continued, "But you two are out of here."
"Aw, come on, this is the good part!" Miyako entreated to no avail.
"Hikaru," Tachiko warned menacingly.
"Right." Hikaru scooped up his protesting beloved and bore her out of the room. Yamato winced as he heard her parting echo, "Maybe they'll elope!" Hikaru laughed after her, while those remaining inside the room sighed.
"So I'm assuming that this is /not/ about you and Tachiko eloping 'niisan, though you do seem to have," Takeru winked mischievously, "hit it off..." Sobering slightly, he added, "Look, is there something wrong? Are you having problems with Mom or something? You don't seem to be yourself..."
"Listen, Takeru, I know this is going to sound crazy, but I need you to believe me." He paused to clear his throat. "I'm not who you think I am. My name is Ishida Yamato, and I come from a parallel universe. Tachiko already found this out before, and I was wondering if you two could help cover for me until I find a way to get home." Yamato knew that being so blunt was making him come off as a lunatic, but for the life of him, he couldn't come up with another approach. He was running out of time! Takaishi Yamato had bought him another day or so, but without Takeru's cooperation, there would be no way to hide 2 Yamato's from their father... He looked grimly over at Tachiko, who was seated at the nearby computer desk, to corroborate.
Before she could get in a word, Takeru replied, looking angry, "I don't know what this is about, 'niisan, but if you two are having problems, you don't have to pretend you're someone else. No matter what, we're still family and that means you can trust me, and trust mom too! I'm sure whatever it is, she's trying her best to relate, I mean its just both of you can be so stubborn!"
"Takeru!"
"Yamato-kun, he's right! You should really tell him the truth about all of this." Tachiko cut in.
"What?" Yamato replied, getting a sinking feeling she was about launch into another elaborate Tai-esque scheme. He moved closer to her in an effort to discern exactly what she had in mind, but all she gave him was a desperate look to play along.
"Fine, if you won't tell him, then I have to. Takeru-kun, the truth is, your brother was afraid to tell you because he didn't know how you'd react, but I caught him earlier checking out guys and I've been trying to convince him to talk to you all day. He's gay Takeru, and he was afraid you might hate him if he told you, but I think you should know."
Takeru looked hushed, though sympathetic. "Oh, wow, 'niisan, really? I, I never would have thought... I mean, I don't know if I understand, but I do know, that you're my brother, and it doesn't matter who you love, its just, er..." he fidgeted in place, "I could never hate you 'niisan, but, it is kind of a shock you know. And I always, always thought that you would hit it off great with Tachiko-san, but maybe I was wrong..." he stopped babbling brokenly, but did offer him a genuine look of acceptance.
Yamato took the time to give Tachiko an evil glare before turning to Takeru, smiling weakly. "Yeah, that's right... I'm gay. Well, uh, sometimes I feel like there's two of me, um, the real me, and the me the rest of this world knows..." he finished, resigned to playing a part in another twisted Yagami plan. He looked back to Tachiko, and his spirits danced between being buoyed by the look of protective confidence on her face, that she could help him out of this, and the sinking shadow of longing to see another carefree face painted with strength and gallantry. 'I miss you Taichi.' he projected into the ether, across the dimensions, into the heart of his beloved, knowing it could never reach. He smiled at his goofy new friend, who was trying to help him as best she could, and put his hand on her shoulder. They faced Takeru together, their backs towards her computer, in a unified front supporting this warped new back-story.
Meanwhile, Tachiko's monitor began glowing while obscure figures raced across the screen, and Takeru, with eyes wide and mouth open, began staring at it in concern. Yamato started to turn towards the screen to figure out what was going on, but was too late to brace himself for the oncoming event. In a blinding flash of light the room seemed to disappear, and the world felt like it was exploding around him. A large mass came hurtling impossibly out of the screen, colliding directly into the two people in front of it. Yamato bore the brunt of the impact, half catching the object in his arms, as it drove him to the ground and snagged Tachiko on their way down.
When their vision cleared, Yamato found himself lying on his back next to Tachiko, who had gone face first into the carpet of the bedroom floor. Takeru ran up to them, and was kneeling beside them to make sure they were all right. With one arm thrown across Tachiko, and the rest of him nestled for the most part deep within Yamato's embrace, Taichi shook off the dazed stupor that had gripped him on his rough journey to this place, and grinned haplessly at the object of his quest beneath him.
"Is it really you?" he asked, though staring into blue eyes dark with emotion, he knew the answer. Taichi buried his face in Yamato's shoulder, unable to stem the tears that fell, and murmured softly to the one he'd waited for, "I'm so glad I found you. You don't know how much..."
For once scorning consequence, Yamato savored the unexpected reunion, drawing his arms tight around the boy, reveling in the solid heavy warmth of his touch and the tickling sweep of lush hair across his face, telling him it was all true. This was Taichi, who'd come for him across worlds, and despite everything, the moment was perfect and unforgettable, as Yamato held his love. It was a moment that was not shattered, even as Takeru uttered in brave awe, "I believe you 'niisan. About the other universe and about him, I believe you."
***
"Well, I hate to break up such a loverly scene, but you think you guys could kindly, get the hell off of me!!!" Tachiko growled, her voice muffled into the ground.
Yamato reluctantly loosened his arms, while Taichi scrambled up quickly, dusting himself off and wiping at his eyes. Helping Tachiko up as he rose, Yamato watched in amusement as Takeru thoroughly examined their new arrival. Meanwhile, Tachiko finally managed to regain her bearings, and set her own sights on the remarkably familiar looking young man.
"Look, Takeru, would you knock it off already." Tai pleaded with his inquisitor, forgetting his alien situation. "I've just gotta get Yama... oh yeah, sorry, you... don't seem to know me..." he sighed in embarrassed frustration. Yamato wanted to embrace him again, but restrained himself.
Takeru, a bit taken aback rushed back over to Yamato and Tachiko, exclaiming, "'niisan, he knows me! Have you ever traveled through a computer too?" Taichi squirmed slightly under this anxious glance, and even more as Tachiko blatantly appraised him.
She advanced, introducing herself. "Yagami Taichi I presume. Nice to meet you. My name's Yagami Tachiko. I'm you in this universe." He looked surprised, but after a moment of looking her over, nodded approvingly.
"Well, this is an unexpected pleasure. It's nice to know that our boy Yama keeps himself in good company. Thanks for taking care of him." he inclined his head in a polite bow. When he turned his attention back on Yamato, it was with burning eyes, full of anger, triumph, and something else that Yama couldn't classify. The last time he'd seen Taichi was in the wake of his heartbreak over witnessing Tai's confession to Sora, and there was part of him that wanted to scream, to make Tai feel a little of what he felt, to make Tai feel anything for him.
Seeing him again made him want so many things, and all the memories welled up in an urge to cry or to lash out, as he had failed in expressing himself to Taichi so many times. But inside of him, all that he could find was love, and hurt, that Taichi could never feel the same. Adrift in his raging emotions, it was all Yamato could do to stand rooted and silent, stony faced as always in his spot, feet away from someone he so wanted to touch, but could never reach.
In the long breathless moment, Taichi's gaze softened, and he asked simply, in his own hurt, "Why did you run away from me?" It was not what he had meant to say. But it escaped him anyway in lieu of more cheap bravado.
Yamato could not answer. 'Because I love you.' he thought. He said nothing.
Tachiko glared at the blond boy in disbelieving exasperation. He had just less than half an hour ago confessed his love for this same 'Taichi', to her no less! It was more idiocy than she would allow. Granted, she was not in the throes of a passionate unrequited (?) love, but she decided to push the envelope a little.
Nudging her counterpart none to gently, she proceeded prod the boys with words, "Go to him. He's been waiting for you. He needs you to take him home." Broken from his near hypnotic focus on Yamato, Taichi regarded her with grateful amazement.
"You're right, what was I thinking?" he asked her, before sauntering over to Yamato and taking his hand. "I'm not afraid of anything." he recited, mostly to himself. Positioning them in front of the computer, he turned back to thank her one last time. "Anyone ever tell you you're a genius babe? And a knockout to boot." he winked at her amiably. "Thanks for everything."
Yamato himself came back to attention enough to echo this. "Yes, thank you so much Tachiko. You've helped me a lot."
Grinning in response, she replied, "Just don't let my good advice go to waste mister." She mimicked Taichi's wink. "Wouldn't want that handsome friend of yours going to all this trouble for nothing."
Blushing pink, Yamato allowed her the jibe, and answered sincerely, "I promise you I won't. Really, thank you, and it was great to meet you. You're a great friend. And take some of your own advice to heart. I'm sure the right one is waiting just around the bend." In a final gesture of parting, he raised her hand to mouth, brushing it gently with his lips. "Farewell, and good luck." He did not notice Taichi go red behind him.
Taichi, his throat strangely dry, yanked Yamato's other hand, which he had yet to release in haste. He heard his own voice crack slightly as he barked, "OK time to go, digiport open!" Before either could move again, the computer monitor beamed a light, engulfing the two boys, and sending them into the varying data stream, out of this universe for good.
Tachiko and Takeru stood for a time in the aftermath, until Takeru, who had spent most of the strange encounter silent and puzzled, demanded, "You are going to explain this to me."
"What's to explain? We told you everything. That wasn't your brother, it was an altraverse Yamato, who also happens to be gay. That other guy was his boyfriend Taichi, who I'm pretty sure equates to me in their world."
"You call that an explanation?"
"I'll clear it up for you if you promise me something."
"Sure, whatever."
"Introduce me to your brother this weekend."
"Um, didn't you say he was gay?"
"Hey, I think it's worth a try. Apparently I'm his type."
"Oh, brother."
***
It was surreal, like an out of body experience. Yamato knew they were data, but within the stream, it was almost like their physical experience was being magnified.
Floating along two parallel beams of light, one pink, one green, they drifted towards their unseen home world, dragging backwards in twists and turns that seemed so easy to be lost in, occasionally buffeted by gusts of what felt like wind, hanging on for dear life.
And through it all, Taichi never let go of his hand. Yamato thought back to so many years ago, when he had joined Taichi to battle Diablomon within the net. He could feel Taichi's heart. Or maybe it was his own, pulsing quickly in panic, in joy.
It was a swim. It was a dream. The dual haze of two minds in conjunction with the extremely visceral reality of their surroundings, the touches, the smells, the visions, all leaping at them, imprinting vividly, was like reliving the moments when their consciousness had merged, when their heart had become one. And this again, was what Yamato craved more than anything.
'It reminds me of...' he caught a wisp of his partner's thoughts. Looking sharply back at Yamato, it seemed that Taichi had sensed the intrusion.
'You can hear me?'
'Yes, I can.' Yamato could feel Taichi's shock at the statement, and even more mysteriously, a touch of anxiety, yet his answer resounded to both them.
'Good. I can feel you too.'
Yamato once again found himself amazed by how simply Taichi could comfort him, and envied his frankness.
'What? I didn't quite catch that Yama. It was like you almost said something to me, then stopped...'
Clamping down on his fancy, Yamato knew a slip in that department might only cause grief and confusion at the moment. He would tell Taichi when this was over.
'I just wanted to know how you found me.'
'Oh.' Had he just felt Taichi's disappointment? 'Just, when we couldn't find you, me and Sora called like the whole gang and tracked you down through the computer. We used Takeru's DNA through the digivice to get a lock on your location.'
'So, what did you and Sora decide anyway?' he filtered through, trying to hide traces of bitterness.
'What?!' Yamato nearly reeled in the backlash of shock sent at him. Still he knew, since he'd started things, he would have to push on. There really was no hiding anything from Taichi here. 'I saw you two talking before. I heard you confess. I,' raw emotion began over bleeding his thoughts here, and he had to regroup himself to continue. 'I want you to be happy...'
'You knew then? Happy? Do you know how happy I at just the fact that you know how much I love you! It's stupid, I know, but I was so scared to tell you. God, even if I don't mean anything to you, it's almost enough that you know, and... you don't hate me... Yamato...!'
Taichi's spectral body moved to embrace him, enveloping and tangling together their spirits, and there was no flesh, but as he was alive, Yamato had never felt anything like it! It was not a touch, but a rush. In that instant everything was Taichi, the world distilled in a single stunning blow.
Things began to turn and fade, reality spinning and compressing, pushing them back into the realm of man. They were flying and falling and through it all, Taichi held him, and he felt complete.
***
This time, it was he who landed in Taichi's arms.
Here, everything was perfect. Yamato had never felt happier in his entire life, and could not imagine any happiness beyond this.
"I love you." Taichi repeated longingly sweet into his ear. Yama felt even happier already, never more glad to be proven wrong.
His heart felt fit to burst. Lying cradled in Taichi's embrace, he wrapped his arms tightly around the other boy. Indulging for a moment, resting his head against his beloved's chest. He could feel the rumble vibration as Taichi spoke.
"Never leave me again. I need you Yamato. You're the only one I dream of, and next to you, I burn with life. Without you, I have no balance, Yamato, without you, I'm not whole. I love you. I never want to let you go. I never want to spend one day away from you. I want us to be together. I'm sorry if I'm being selfish. I could never wish you any pain, but I need you to know, exactly how I feel." Yamato felt the shudder of fear running through Taichi beneath him.
Slowly, Yamato drew himself over his partner, so he could look down into the boy's face. Gently he reached out, cupping Taichi's chin in his hand, dropping his gaze to meet directly with Taichi's eyes. Struggling with clarity and emotion, Yamato felt his eyes tearing up, water seeping thinly from their corners, carving lines across his cheeks before dropping soundlessly onto Taichi's face below.
"You're wonderful Taichi. And I've loved you for a long time." Closing his eyes fully, he let more tears drop until he could hold back no longer, grasping Taichi to him tightly. He breathed in Taichi's scent deeply, melting into his love's arms as they clasped around him, pressing their lips together in sweet harmony, their hearts finally in perfect accord.
They were oblivious as around them, the other children hurried to make privacy. Jyou and Koushirou left hand in hand ready to return to their quiet evening together. Sora helped usher the tired younger generation out, contemplating placing a long call to a certain someone across the ocean. After her exertion maintaining cross-dimensional links, Hikari didn't mind when Miyako insisted on walking her home. Meanwhile, Iori offered to treat Takeru to some ice cream to help him regain his strength, and perhaps find Ken or Daisuke to hang out with, though they would likely come as a pair. To all this, Yamato and Taichi paid no heed, thoroughly enchanted in their own wonderland.
***
A/N: just in time for V-day, a lovely piece of sap. well, it was fun anyway, if a bit heavy handed. i gave in to the mush, i couldn't help myself. Wow, this is the first i've ever finished (and might be the only one...) Yay for taito fluff! anyway, i know this last chap was particularly bad, but tai and yama just deserve a cutesy ending... i actually named this fic after clamp's miyuki-chan in wonderland (not alice, go figure, wait, no, i'm just an anime obsessed moron...) but most of the allusion credit for this one should go to koko wa greenwood! for suka-chan (i couldn't resist!) and the idea of a sex changed universe. ha, michiru and shinobu, ha! anyway, here's lookin' at you kid. thanks for your support