By Misty Flores – mistyjox@hotmail.com
Teaser: Lorne has his hands full when three men who love three brunettes reveal three stories that meld surprisingly – and the three brunettes go missing.
Genre: Angel: The Series, Comedy/Romance/Action
Pairing: Angel/Cordelia, Gunn/Fred, Wesley/Faith
Rating: R for sexual situations
Special Thanks to: Vanessa, and her beautiful beta reading abilities.
Additional Notes on previous chapters.
--
CHAPTER NINE
Friday Afternoon – Cordelia Chase's Apartment
Cordelia had to hand it to the damned vampire. Leave it up to him, to do the exact opposite of what she had expected. Cordelia was at her absolute wit's end. She knew that Angel had this strange habit and penchant for brooding, yes. But in all honesty, the stalker-y thing truly never appealed to her.
She had been furious with Angel. She was still furious, MORE THAN furious with Angel, and yet every time she turned around, there he was. His damned puppy dog face, staring out at her from shadows, she heard his voice on her answering machine, her cellphone voicemail. It got the point where she thought she was hallucinating, stepping out from the bathroom at the night club and seeing the swish of a trench coat moving into the shadows.
He had done it countless times; Angel was known for being more than a little overprotective, sure. But she had never been so aware of it, his dark eyes watching from the corners, blending in, a dark, haunting face nagging at her at every turn.
"Cordelia, isn't that your boss?" Even Vicki had pointed it out, seeing him at the edge of the bar, staring at her with mournful eyes. Cordelia had denied it, knowing what Angel needed was for her to acknowledge his presence, to become furious enough to take him outside, talk to him, deal with him. That was what he wanted: validation: acknowledgement that he still meant enough to her, for her to become angry. He was out to prove something - that this wouldn't work. That she couldn't 'fix' things this way.
WELL DUH! Of COURSE she couldn't fix things this way - that had been her whole POINT back at the damned hotel, wasn't it? Angel was stubborn, that was true, but Cordelia knew how to play games, and although she had never played them with him, she was now furious enough to try. The vampire with his stupid soul had put her through enough heartache. Now it was his turn to see how it felt to get frozen out.
During the night, Cordelia put most of her efforts on ignoring Angel's presence. At one point, it had occurred to her that she was quite sure she had never held this much affection in Angel's heart before, to have this power over him. To be able to ignore him, to be able to prove that he couldn't live without her, would have required some acknowledgement on both their parts that they meant that much to each other - they couldn't be without each other.
It would mean that there was love, and GOD, the LAST thing she wanted to admit was that. It had gone unspoken for so long, and it was nice that way. The almost knowing, the almost believing – the waking up in each other's arms in the not quite platonic way, never acknowledging that two creatures were 'in love'; it was safe. She didn't want love. She was terrible at loving someone, terrible at being 'in love', and she knew for a fact, Angel had more than proven that he was no Cyrano at this relationship stuff either. With a 'relationship' came this: fighting, ignoring, proving points and finding ground.
This relationship SUCKED.
Pushing back the pain, Cordelia walked up the cement stairs leading to her apartment, listening to Vicki's nice, but overly chatty voice, with a slight headache.
"And Rick does want an August wedding, but I've always had my heart set on June, you know?"
She gave her a distracted smile, fishing for her keys in her purse.
"You sure you don't mind if I use your bathroom?"
"No, it's totally fine, we did have a few of those martinis," Cordelia admitted, pushing against the door, whispering hurriedly under her breath for Dennis to behave.
"You gotta admit, you had a good time."
Oh yeah, great. Listening to hours on end about stage sets, and who was sleeping with who, and how Vicki had fallen down the stairs in the set change and they had to use the stunt double to do her wave - and did she mention about the budget costs? Cordelia suppressed the urge to roll her eyes. It had taken all her gumption, not to tell all the little vain 'prissies' to shut the hell up before her head exploded.
She had to admit, there was some longing for the happy ignorance her group of actress friends collectively shared. Oh, for the days when all she thought about, was which producer was the hottest, and getting into 'character'. Beat the hell out of wondering how on earth she and Angel could pursue a romantic relationship without him turning evil, or if the next vision would make her head implode.
"I did have fun. It was nice to get out, but I have to tell you, I'm more looking forward to that stripper you promised - Faith."
Cordelia paused, suddenly focused on the dark-haired girl in the black pants and black tank top, shifting restlessly, sitting at the dining room table.
Standing up, Faith gave her a grim look. "Hey, 'C."
"Hi…" Cordelia looked puzzled. Suddenly remembered her friend, when Vicki squeezed her shoulder, she blinked. "Oh, right. Vicki, this is Faith. We're… old high school … somethings. Kinda."
"Oh, hi!" Vicki stepped forward, shaking Faith's hand emphatically. "Love the look! Is that tattoo real? I totally wanted to get one, but my dad would have killed me, and now Rick's not into them, but I did want to sneak one on my back, like Cordy's. Have you seen it? It's really cute, right? I mean, I thought about it, but wouldn't it hurt? And what about when you get old, don't you think it'll be weird to have it on you when you're like, sixty? Especially on your arm like that? Well, I mean, if it's real?"
Faith's eyes were glazed over, and she stared at Cordelia helplessly for an explanation.
"Bathroom's over here, Vicki," Cordelia said, pushing her friend toward the desired direction.
"You hung out with her all night, and you didn't kill her?" Faith asked darkly.
"And an afternoon," Cordelia answered tiredly, holding up a shopping bag. "Wedding souvenirs. Anyone who says I'm no philanthropist is on crack."
Faith gave her a small grin. "Right, always ready to help the pretty, rich and the famous?"
Cordelia sighed, setting down her bags. That done, she was finally able to give the Slayer a questioning glance. "What are you doing here, anyway? Did you ever leave? And how'd you get in?"
Faith sank down on the sofa, shifted uncomfortably on it, and suddenly sprang up, moving away from it. "I needed a place to crash, for a while. Dennis let me in."
Cordelia shot the air a look. "You let her in?"
"We have an understanding," Faith said quickly, and offered no further explanation.
Cordelia's eyes rolled to the ceiling, making a mental note to talk to her ghost about his lax 'letting psycho killers into the house' rule. "What about the hotel?" she asked frankly. "I mean, that IS where you're staying, right?"
"Are you kidding? First of all, the green guy insists on trying to get near me, and if he even thinks about reading me, I'm tearing off those damn horns and sticking them up his ass. Secondly, that little crazy taco chick- what's up with that anyway?- she's all sulking in her room, and when she's not, that damn baby's crying, and Angel isn't even AROUND-"
"I know, he's stalking ME," Cordelia said, peering out the window.
"He's what?"
"Likes to do that once in a while, puts him back in touch with his inner Angelus, or something, I don't know."
There was something that Cordelia wasn't telling her, but never one to really pry, and at this moment too conflicted to care, Faith was perfectly happy to let secrets stay secrets. There was no way in hell she was spilling what SHE did last night, or who she did, for that matter.
Cordelia was still at the window, hazel eyes roving around the street, torn between need to see Angel skulking, and the urge to kill him if he was. "Speaking of fellow employees, where's Wesley?"
"HUH?"
Cordelia turned, startled when Faith suddenly jumped to her feet. "What?"
"What?!"
"Wesley, nimrod."
"What about Wesley?!" Cordelia paused, eyebrow cocking as the Slayer suddenly crossed her arms, a hostile gesture, emotion flashing in her dark orbs.
"What's with you?"
"Nothing. I don't know where the fuck Wesley is, okay? Damn."
"Okay, Drama Queen, take a pill." Cordelia replied dryly. "You don't know where he is, geez. What'd you do, beat him to bloody pulp again?"
"Cordelia, fuck off."
Wow, she was really pissed. On what had to be pure instinct, because if she had actually stopped to THINK, Cordelia would NEVER have actually STOPPED the ex-killer from LEAVING, the Seer stepped forward. "Faith, hey! What's with the attitude!"
"Why the hell do you care?"
"I don't know. Maybe because there's only ONE of us here allowed to be emotionally constipated, and I like that it's me."
The words sunk in as Faith paused. She couldn't help but smirk at the self absorbed logic. This chick was one-of-a-kind, that was for sure. Suddenly not as furious with herself, or the damned Queen, Faith gave her a look. "Well, wouldn't dream of usurping THAT title from you."
"Damned straight." Cordelia gave a slight grin.
Faith sucked in her breath, ignored the trembling of her insides. In a slow voice, she said thickly, "Wesley's with his girlfriend, last I heard."
Confusion flitted over Cordelia's features. "Wesley doesn't have a girlfriend. He doesn't even have a life. He's got a DVD player and a subscription to an adult video store."
Faith, suddenly riveted by the first sentence, forgot everything else. "Then who the hell is Virginia?"
"Virginia? Ohh… she called?"
"Who the hell is she?"
Cordelia's eyes darkened in thought. "Wesley's Ex. She was nice and everything, but she dumped him."
"She what?"
The telephone rang, breaking up the conversation. Cordelia sucked in her breath, staring at the receiver as if it were some kind of roach. It continued to ring.
Faith waited impatiently, glancing at the cordless. "Cor? You wanna get that? It's getting annoying."
"I'm not getting it."
"What?"
"It's my stalker. I'm not getting it."
Faith, confused beyond belief, finally just decided to wait. The ringing ended (FINALLY) and the machine picked up.
"Hi," the answering machine began in a tinny voice that sounded like Cordelia. "You've reached the line of Cordelia Chase. If this is Angel- I told you not to call, you big undead bastard. Leave me the hell alone. If it's anyone else, please leave a message at the tone. Beeeeeeeeeeep."
Faith cocked an amused eyebrow, smile faltering when she heard the harried message that followed.
"Cordelia, it's me. Pick up. We need to talk. Look, I know you're mad, okay? I get that, but we NEED to talk. I screwed up, I admit it. But you can't just shut me out!"
The harried voice belonged to Angel, that was obvious. Faith crossed her arms, sending a questioning look to Cordelia. The woman in question, to her credit, didn't even seem to be listening, much more intent on studying her manicured nails.
"Look- PICK UP. I know you're there. That's it, I'm coming over."
Cordelia wore a carefully closed expression as she walked purposefully to the machine, reached down, and pulled out the telephone cord.
"Damn. What the hell did he do?"
Cordelia blew the bangs off her face, shrugging hurriedly. "Suddenly I feel like a drink. Away from here. Interested?"
"It's like, five."
"So? When has that stopped you?"
There was a fragile balance in Cordelia right now, some weird emotional state. Faith recognized it immediately. Little Miss Priss was about ten seconds away from breaking down into either hysterical sobs or going into some little hissy fit. Faith was in the mood for neither. Besides, sitting on Cordy's couch was kinda weird. It brought back some memories and made her just a little turned on, and it made her want to track that bastard down and kill him -
And what the FUCK was this ex-girlfriend doing calling HIM?!
"Yeah. I'm good for getting out of here."
The flush of the toilet took both of their attentions off the subject at hand.
"Shit. Vicki."
"She's really psyched about getting married?"
"Oh yeah. It's disgusting."
"I can imagine," Faith replied, registering her distaste with a grimace. "I'll take care of it."
At Cordelia's answering quirk of her eyebrow, Faith just winked. "I can creep people out in ten seconds flat."
"I'm timing."
"Wow! Cordelia, that bathtub is gorgeous!" Vicki threw a thumb back towards the bathroom. "I mean, I had a friend, Tara, she had a beautiful one, but she said the porcelain would splinter, and it would be hard to clean, you know? And-"
"Hey, Vicki. Question. What do you do?" Faith asked, her eyebrow arching suggestively as she walked forward. There was something in her stride that threw the slim girl off. Threatening, and yet there was nothing that could prove Faith had any intention of hurting her, it made Vicki smile nervously.
Cordelia sank down on the couch, crossing her legs as she watched.
"I'm a soap actor," she answered, stepping back unconsciously. "Days of Our Lives. Do you watch?"
"Not really, no." Faith smiled. "Didn't really have a chance, where I came from."
Seeing where this was going, Cordelia cocked her head, somewhat amused.
"Oh? Where do you come from?" Vicki asked politely.
"I'm actually a killer just released from the pen," Faith said matter-of-factly, smile broadening at Vicki's stunned face. "Got off on good behavior. Haven't killed someone in five months! Going for six now!" Flashing the stunned actress a thumbs up, she crossed her legs, moving down next to Cordelia with a self-satisfied expression on her face. "Another month and I get a chip!"
"We're all very excited about it," Cordelia added dryly.
Vicki's mouth still seemed to be hanging open, her fingers tightening on her shopping bags as she looked from Cordelia to Faith, both brunettes sitting side by side.
"Well… um… I should probably get going."
Cordelia rolled her eyes, finally taking pity on her friend. Getting up, she took a gentle hand to Vicki's elbow and steered her to the door. "I'll see you tomorrow night."
"Right. Sure… um…"
"I won't bring Faith," Cordelia reassured her. Vicki broke out into a relieved grin.
"Hey, maybe you should. It definitely wouldn't be boring."
"Bye, Vicki! Nice talking to you!" Faith said, giving an over enthusiastic wave from her position on the couch.
Cordelia slammed the door shut.
Wow. She hadn't scared anyone in a while. It felt a little like coming home. Giving a contented sigh, the first in a while, Faith stood, stretching slightly. Casting eyes back to her uneasy ally, she found the Seer staring at her in open admiration.
"What?" she asked self consciously.
"I so wanna marry you, right now."
An unwelcome blush fought its way to Faith's pronounced cheeks. The Slayer just winked, picking up her leather jacket and moving past her to the door. "I'll settle for that drink."
--
The Present – The Hyperion Hotel
Angel leaned over the cradle, his eyes moist as he looked down at his sleeping child. A lump settled in his throat, a soft, needless sigh flowing from his breathless lips as he rested his chin on the edge of the child's bed.
"I'm sorry," he said to his young baby. Little Connor continued to sleep, unknowing that his father had single-handedly managed to muck up the entire family that his child, that HE needed.
"Sweetheart, I'm telling you one more time. You wanna do the brooding thing, you do that in black. 'Cause the white? Inspires golf games and tennis matches, not brood marathons."
Angel closed his eyes in mild irritation as Lorne entered the room. "Where are the others?" he asked heavily.
"Gunn fell asleep on the couch before I could get any more out of him, I'll wake him up in a bit. Wesley's trying to take care of the blood."
Angel nodded, keeping his eyes on Connor.
"You know," Lorne began, moving to sit on the bed. "This whole time, I kept wondering why everyone was avoiding me. I never would have guessed what happened between Gunn-y and Fred. I never would have believed Wesley and Faith could have fallen into bed together. But, sweetie, I think I saw the situation with you and Cordelia ten miles away."
"Funny," Angel answered dryly. "I never saw it coming. I never saw it. Why didn't I see it, Lorne?"
The Host was uncharacteristically silent. "What?" he asked finally. "You and Cordelia?"
The vampire nodded.
He shrugged, blowing out his breath in contemplation. "Sometimes we don't want to see it, sweetheart. It wasn't just you. Cordelia doesn't want this anymore than you do."
"I want it, Lorne," Angel said darkly. "I want it. I want HER. I don't know if I've ever had her, but I sit here, in the dark, and all I want is to see her. To hold her. I don't know how it happened, but it has. And I don't know how to love her, without hurting her."
"All you know is that you can't stop. You can't walk away, and you can't run this time."
Angel swallowed, circling his child's hand with a soft, gentle finger, an effort to maintain some sort of focus.
"Angel," Lorne began slowly. "No one knows how to love. Take it from me, Chickadee, sometimes that's all you can do. And that's everything."
Angel's eyes closed. More than anything, he wanted to believe that.
--
Friday Afternoon – The Hyperion Hotel
The hotel had become her haven. It had also been, on previous occasions, her nightmare. Fred was of a cerebral sort. She slid through two types of thought processes. There were times when every nuance of her being was involved in some sort of analysis. Flitting through her mind were possibilities and angles, beliefs. She never said one word out loud, but in seconds, suddenly what seemed the most devastating obstacle could become easily solvable. The second process was one that involved a lot of her friends losing patience. It was the rambling, when everything became vocal, words speaking out loud, tumbling forth from lips that stumbled, unable to keep up with her mind.
It made for a complicated, and yet straight forward, woman, and she wondered how many people actually knew that. Sitting here in the hallway, in the shadows of the second floor, with no one home, Fred felt alone. But she wasn't scared. For the first time in a long time, she was more angered than scared, more sad than worried. Since she had come back to earth, Fred had learned the value in placing trust in others, so much that she wondered if it had softened her. Her phone, old-fashioned, sat on her legs. Staring at it, she contemplated, and finally picked it up, punching Cordelia's cell phone number slowly.
It rang twice, three times, and the voicemail picked up.
"Hi, you've reached Cordelia. I'm screening my calls now, and Angel if this is you, I'm going to tell you ONE MORE TIME not to call. I'll kick your ass, you undead bastard. Anyone else, this better be an emergency. If I really wanted to talk to you, well then I'd call you, wouldn't I? Beep."
Fred blinked, holding the phone away from her and staring at the receiver.
What on earth?
Was this an emergency? What could she say? Mulling the words over,
she considered, "Hey, Cordy! I'm okay, but Gunn's gonna meet up with Holtz
and possibly get killed. But don't tell anyone, 'kay?"
Didn't seem to quite work. Time made her decision for her, as the session timed out, and Fred heard a distinct dial tone on the other end. With a sigh, she punched in Wesley's phone number.
"This is Virginia."
Fred blinked. "I- uh."
"Bloody hell, give me that. Faith?!"
Fred gave a confused mumble. "Wesley?"
"Fred?! Have you heard from Faith?"
"Ah- no- Actually I was wondering if-"
"Bloody hell, Virginia! Fine. Fred, forgive me, I have to go. I'll see you tomorrow!"
"Wesley, but I-"
Click. Well. This wasn't going well. One more try. Trying to still her trembling insides, Fred dialed another phone number.
*ring*
She sighed with relief when the click was heard.
"Cordelia?!"
Suddenly deflated, Fred lolled her head back, leaning against the wall.
"Cordelia, is that you? Where are you?"
This time, Fred just gave up, hanging up the phone, placing it to her side, and bringing her knees up to cradle against her chest. So much for her friend's help then. Fred gave a small moan, suddenly feeling helplessly alone. Things were rapidly taking a bad turn to worse, and she had no idea what to do.
"Fred?"
The lone call from the lobby seemed far off. Fred waited a minute, unsure, until she heard it again.
"Fred!"
Sucking in her breath, she scrambled to her feet, fighting back the tears she had no idea were coming until she wiped their beginning trails away.
"Charles?!" she asked breathlessly, body completely on edge, heart hammering a mile a minute. Striding quickly to the top of the stairs, a sigh of relief overtook her, when she found Charles standing at the foot of the stair case, looking up at her with mournful, sad eyes.
"Fred, I'm sorry."
With her hand on the banister, long hair cascading down her back, his little Fred appeared like some sort of heaven sent being. His chest gave a tug, and all pride melted away at the hopeful shining of her eyes. His feet were frozen to the floor, fingers unclenching in relief as she began to descend, gaze only for him. Gunn didn't know what was happening, but suddenly it all began to make sense: Why he had to come back, why he had to try to do anything to make it all right.
"I'm sorry," he said again.
She was only a foot away now. Now, she was even closer. His eyes were riveted to her form, the small smile on her beautiful features, as she walked into his arms, cupping his face with her palms, nodding at him with moist eyes.
"I'm sorry, too," she whispered. Seconds later, he had her crushed to him, holding her tightly. Her lithe body was trembling. Charles closed his eyes tight, trying to keep her with him, so relieved that she was still there, in his arms.
"I need you, you know," he whispered hastily, words tumbling out as his raw emotion overtook him. "I just… I need you beside me. I don't got you, I don't have anyone, Fred."
"You have me, Charles," she responded, pulling back. Sharing an intense gaze, a small grin played on her lips, moistened eyes glittering at him.
Her eyes had little gold flecks in them. Funny, how he had never noticed them before. And she had freckles on her face. You could barely see them, because her dimples were so distracting. It was just… a breathtakingly beautiful face, with these shining eyes and…
He gulped, tightening his arms around her small waist, bringing her in closer, and in a move that seemed remarkably easy, he slanted his lips over hers, tasting her. She breathed into his lips with a sigh, fingers tangling into each other as she pulled back to take a breath, and buried her lips into his again. The kiss was longer, wetter. It was increasingly hard to contain the desire. Gunn gave a low growl, tangling his fingers into her curls, tilting her head to gain better access to her inviting mouth. When they broke apart, Gunn dove for her neck, smiling into her skin as she gave a shudder, clutching him tighter.
"Gunn…" she began thickly. "I don't know if we should…" Her eyes closed, a sigh coming raggedly from her parting lips as he slowly began to nibble on her earlobe. "Do this," she finished with some effort.
She cursed herself for saying anything at all when he paused. Her fingers distractedly rose to his lips, outlining them, mind muddled with desire. "You think we're … messing with our friendship?"
Her fingers were already working at his collar, smoothing around his neck, pulling him back down until his lips were only centimeters from hers.
"Nothing wrong with bein' friendly," she whispered, in what seemed a brilliant stroke of logic.
"Right," he said back just as seriously, nodding adamantly. "Just as long as we… you know… are just being friendly."
"And friends trust each other…"
"A lot…" he said, eyes closing as his lips caressed her cheek, tongue flicking out lightly as they moved to her jaw, sending shivers through her.
"So we're good…"
"Yeah… we're good…"
Her smile was genuine as she pulled back, hands reaching for the intrusive sweater covering his torso. "Nothing wrong with bein' friendly," she repeated.
--
The Present – Kate Lockley's Apartment
"That's too much butter."
Faith gave Cordelia a glare, turning back to her saucepan, peering into it. "Listen, Cordelia. I haven't had a good tub of popcorn since -"
"Yesterday. Which I paid for. Which you ate. ALL OF," Cordelia reminded her, coming into the kitchen and pulling open the microwave door, shaking the hissing bag of Orville's kernels.
"Right. Well, before that. Since jail, and I'm gonna enjoy my stupid butter, okay?"
"You're not going to keep using that are you? Because if you tell me one more time that you're gonna do something because you didn't do it in the pen, I'll bitch slap you so fast you won't have TIME to slay anything."
Faith rolled her eyes, nudging at Cordelia, noticing with some consternation, that Cordelia nudged back. Things were getting damn chummy between the two of them, and Faith, not at all used to female bonding, was grudgingly only slightly able to admit that it was something she kinda enjoyed, despite the circumstances that had forced them all together in a bar, drunk off their asses. Casting a glance to the living room, through the open door, Faith laid thoughtful eyes on a smiling Fred, who was still fighting with Kate over her choice of the color pink.
"So… You going to tell Fred that 'friends with benefits' doesn't exactly work?"
"I think she's pretty much figured it out on her own," Cordelia replied, leaning against the counter, looking back in Fred's direction. "Funny, isn't it?"
"What?" Faith asked, jerking the bag of popcorn from Cordelia and pouring the melted butter into it, smiling at Cordelia's disgust.
The Seer rolled her eyes, but ignored it. "She's the only one who seems… or seemed… happy - I mean, before Gunn messed it up."
Faith was quiet for a minute, dark eyes whipping toward the hazel of Cordelia's. "You're seriously not happy with Angel?"
Cordelia sighed, pressing a palm against her forehead. That was a million dollar question. "I can't picture my life without him. And, every single bit of happiness I have, is tied into him. But… I don't know if I can be WITH him. What with Buffy, if SHE couldn't make it work, a bonafide HERO -"
"Okay, you're not her."
"Tell him that." Faith sucked in her breath, her sudden loss of appetite forcing her to put the freshly popped kernels down. "I'm not leaving him anytime soon," Cordelia admitted, her fingers rolling over a kernel of her own. "But I don't know how I can stop loving him now… and still – things can't go further, you know? But I can't stop. Whatever we HAD when we were friends… it's just so much harder now."
"Since when have you walked away from a challenge?" Faith asked quietly. "Fuck, Chase, you dated XANDER."
"Yeah, and look how that turned out." Cordelia gave a small, grim smile, before she straightened to her full form, and pinned the other girl with bursts of hazel. "And what about you?"
"What about me?"
"Sex with Wesley? Did that give you the big happy? On my couch?"
Faith's gaze immediately averted, her fingers clenching at the counter. "I'm not talking about it."
"If he said he was sorry, would you take him back?"
"Fuck, Cordy-"
"Would you?"
"Angel said he was sorry-"
"Sorry doesn't mean shit to me."
Faith blinked, suddenly confused. "What?"
Cordelia's gaze was cool, but also incredibly sad. She leaned against the counter, eyes on the floor. "'I'm sorry'? That's just words. I never believe in words. I spent my whole life saying one thing, meaning another. It's bullshit, Faith. It's what you do that matters. Words are just wasted breath of air."
"So words aren't enough."
Cordelia swallowed, her eyes increasingly bright. "I don't know. Maybe I'm just waiting for the right words."
--
Friday Night – Wesley's Apartment
Angel's body was weighted down with exhaustion when he knocked on Wesley's door. Emotion hung on his body, an unwanted invisible mantle, eyes dark and full of thought as he waited for the Englishman to open the door. He was quickly losing hope. Cordelia was angry… she was so angry- and he had no idea how to fix this… There was nothing he could say that would help, he knew her that well. He had been hoping that somehow, in some blind gesture, she would be forced to see him, understand what he meant and what he wanted -
The door opened. Wesley stared at him with dark, disappointed eyes.
"Oh, it's you."
Angel's brow furrowed as Wesley turned, pulling on a black tuxedo jacket. "What are you doing?"
"Angel, have you heard from Faith at all?" Wesley asked.
Angel paused, unable to understand why his friend would ask that. Wesley's back was turned to him, but there was something in his voice.
"No. Why?"
"You promised to speak to her," Wesley answered quietly, picking up a bowtie from his dresser. Angel gave a sigh, a groan overtaking him.
"Yeah, sorry…. I… it's been rough. Cordelia-"
"I see."
The tone was sharp, Angel flinched from it. Venturing forward, he began softly, "I was… hoping you could talk."
"I'm afraid I'm rather busy at the moment." Wesley turned, gulping down a hard swallow as he tightened the bow tie. "Virginia called. She asked me to accompany her to a function."
"She called? For what, like a date?"
"No, not a date." Wesley's voice was somber, quiet, and once again Angel got the distinct impression something was very wrong.
"Wesley, what happened? Do you need help?"
"Oh, heaven forbid I distract you from your Cordelia stalking," Wesley said dryly. Angel looked away. Wesley's face softened at the reaction. "Pardon me, Angel. It's … nothing I can't handle. Virginia just needed someone she trusted. It means nothing. I would rather … you talked to Faith. I imagine things have been rough."
"Has she said anything to you?"
"Faith doesn't trust me," Wesley gave Angel a grim smile. "No reason she should really. I'll have my cellphone on, if you'd like to reach me. Tell her…"
"Wesley, I don't even know where she is. I stopped by Cordy's, and Dennis wouldn't even open the door, and -"
"Well, obviously Dennis isn't going to bloody open the door if Cordelia's pissed, Angel, bloody hell." Wesley looked tired as he grabbed his keys, stuffing them into his pocket. "Cordelia loves you, Angel. I would you advise you trust that, and give her the time she needs."
"Wesley, she's trying to -"
"Make you less than what you are." Wesley's hand was still on the doorway, his back to Angel, making it impossible to see his expression. "She can't do that for long. You're everything to her. That's what love truly is. The question is… what can you offer her? If it's nothing… then why bother?"
The door closed, leaving Angel in darkness, the turmoil in his heart only splintering with Wesley's parting words.
End chapter