Drawn To Me- Part 4 of Song of Solomon Series. ("Like a lily among thorns, so is my loved one among the young women.")
by: Isabelle
Disclaimers: BTVS belongs to Joss Whedon along with all the characters--these are sued for entertainment. Lyrics belong to Lara Fabian, You are My Heart & I will love Again
Spoilers: "Smashed" and "Wrecked" Season 6 Summary: Set some fifty years after "Smashed", Spike died about seven months after the episode aired. Buffy being not truly human is more of an immortal; she's alone in this earth and her life does an 360 degree turn when she runs into Rocco in a bar one night. Rocco is somewhat the reincarnation of Spike's soul. B/S, some B/Rocco. Rating: Strong R
Distribution: Please do not take without my permission. The only sites that have my pre-approval to post my stuff is Carnal Sins (cause it's mine), Death-Marked Love, and any affiliate/soulmate of mine.
Feedback: bih80@yahoo.com
Author's notes: If you've read 100 yrs of Solitude and enjoyed it you will like this, think Spike in 100 yrs, reversed to Buffy. Special thanks to by Betas Allison and Ophelia ;o)--they're wonderful *xoxoxox*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Did I
ever tell you how you live in me?
Every waking moment,
Even in my dreams."
I will love again, Lara Fabian
"So, how exactly do you make your living, luv?"
Rocco asked a half-dressed Buffy as she rummaged the bottom of her closet for her boots.
The blonde was squatting; wincing at her not yet healed ribs. "Like you said, I'm an assassin."
Rocco looked appreciatively at her butt as she wiggled it in the air and smirked. "So you say this as if it's nothin'," he said, trying to act like all of his blood pressure was not going south.
Buffy smiled indulgently as she held her boot up in triumph. "Found it!"
Rocco went to her and helped her stand up. "I still don't know why you're working—you are all sore an' purple."
Buffy limped to the bed and pulled on her boot. "It's either work limping or die. I prefer the first one."
Rocco took the seat next to her. "I don't get you, slayer. You mope about having the worst life and then you do everything to prevent yourself from dying. Make up your bleedin' mind."
"I'll do it," Angel said to the group.
Cordy stood up abruptly, waking up Liam. "Angel"
He turned to look at her, his six-month child in her arms. "Take care of him for me?" he asked her.
He could see the tears forming in her eyes but was shaken out of their trance when Spike placed his hand on his arm.
"No, I'll do it," the younger vampire said.
Angel turned to look at him. "What?"
"What?" Buffy echoed next to him, looking at them in despair.
Spike sighed and ran his hand through his bleached locks. "A vampire needs to be the one to hold the portal open—I can do it."
"It'll kill you, William," Angel reminded him.
Spike purposely avoided Buffy's gaze. "I knowguess it's my turn to make up for what I've done."
Angel studied him for some time and finally shook his head.
Before the dark haired vampire could tell him to forget it, Spike spoke. "You have a son, Angelus—the powers have a larger plan for you. We've all known it. MeI'm just a soul-less vampire," he said and shrugged. "You stay—make sure Liam fulfills his destiny."
Angel's eyes watered at his words and the pain of nostalgia filled him the same way it had filled him when Darla had died. He couldn't help from taking the younger vampire in his arms and hugging him. The rest of the occupants in the bowed their heads as the only soul-less creature volunteered to be sacrificed.
"I'm really proud of you, m'boy," Angel told him.
Before anyone could react Buffy bolted out of the room, running out into the night.
Spike pulled back knowing what his slayer's reaction was going to be.
Without further word he ran after her.
"Buffy!"
She ran faster when she heard his voice.
"Slayer, don't be"
She turned around and glared at him.
"What? Bitchy? Well I have the right to be bitchy at the moment—I have every right, Spike!" her last words came out almost as a sob.
He walked quickly up to her and wrapped her in his arms.
She grabbed on to him and sobbed in his chest as he rocked her back and forth. "I'll find a way—I swear I'll find a way—you just wait, you hold on and I'll find a way, she said, her words muffled on his chest.
"Shhhpet, you know there's no other way." Spike whispered against her hair. There was one thing he didn't want, and that was to leave this life he had just found.
Buffy took his face in her trembling hands and kissed him. She pulled back, tears running down her flushed checks. "I hate this—I hate my lifeit's not fair. The powers wait until I find someone I love and then they rip it away from me."
Spike leaned in his forehead against hers and cried with her. "I love you baby—no matter what, I love you. You remember that, you hear? No matter what—I'll always be with you. Cause if one of us survives then a part of the other lives too."
Buffy wrapped her arms around him and inhaled his smell. "I love you—why does love have to hurt so much?"
"Love don't hurt—it's loosing it that kills, but you wont lose it, pet. You'll never lose it."
Buffy sobbed against him, kissing his neck and cheeks. "I don't want to live, Spike—I can't."
Spike pulled back away from her and took her face between his hands. His blue eyes sparkling in the night. "No! You listen to me, Buffy—you stay alive, you survive, no matter what. I'm dying so you can live—just like you did for me last time, remember? And it'll hurt, baby—it'll hurt like hell, and some days you'll feel like dying'. But not living is the coward's way out—and that's one thing you're not. You're a warrior...you're my warrior." He touched her hair gently. "I love you, Summers."
He kissed her forehead and leaned into her, while she cried quiet sobs against that familiar leather. "You remember what I told you the day we couldn't stop singing'?" he asked her. Buffy shook her head.
"You must go on living—so one of us is living."
"Cause I have to live—I have to go on living." She looked back at Rocco. "As long as one of us is alive a little part of the other lives on."
How did I
ever
Get to here?
Why do I need you?
Why do I have
To cry these tears?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`
The three men inside the parked SUV with tinted black windows looked on at the two pedestrians.
The front seat passenger looked at the driver and nodded.
The driver took out his cell phone and dialed one of the memory numbers. "Boss? We found em."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`
Buffy glared at Rocco when he told her his plan.
"I don't think so," she said and crushed the cigarette under her healed boot.
Rocco sighed and continued on his way.
"Where are you going?" she cried after him.
"I'm treating you to a nice dinner, you need to eat somethin' other than buffalo wings an' flowerin' onions," He said.
She caught up with him and grabbed his arms forcing him to look at her. "I don't need to be fed, I make my own money."
Rocco pointed at the bruises in her face. "I would advise getting a new profession—this one seems to make you age."
Buffy glared at him. "And what exactly do you expect me to do, work in an office—nine to five? Hey—what do you suppose my boss will say after I've worked there twenty years and I still look 24? Anti-wrinkle cream?"
Rocco shook her arm off. "You keep giving yourself excuses like this and you'll remain as unhappy as you arealways—for all of eternity. Can you imagine that existence?"
Buffy was not able to take her eyes off his hypnotic blue ones—they held her captive like similar ones did so long ago. She felt her chest constrict and her breathing accelerate. So she did what Buffy Summers did. She grabbed the back of his neck and pressed her lips against his.
Rocco was beyond surprised, but within seconds he was plundering her mouth as well.
Buffy moaned into the kiss, she could feel his groin growing against her stomach. She hadn't kissed like this indecades. And these lips—she knew these lips. And suddenly she was back in time, kissing Spike.
She felt miserable, she felt dead, and she felt abandoned. It was a sick twisted pain that was eating her alive. Any moment and she was going to cave—let go of everything.
She felt his presence next to her and she groaned inwardly. If he came any closer she would devour him, if he walked away perhaps she could regain some of her dignity.
She stared ahead, here sitting in the bar with the sad song playing in the background. But the more she ignored him the more he stood there.
She turned her head slowly to look at him. It could only be a look—anything more she would beg for him to hold her in his arms and make her forget this rotten world.
He looked so concerned, but if she gave in he might leave—just like her father did, just like Angel did, just like Riley did, just like Mom did, just like Giles just did. And she couldn't do it, she couldn't stand the pain in her heart—it was eating her inside.
So she turned from him—it was better this way.
She felt him leave; the anger and frustration he carried hit her like a ton of blocks. And she needed to live, she needed to feel, she needed to do something, anything.
She told herself she would let him go—she would be all right. But she knew she wouldn't be all right.
So she ran after him.
Panic gripped at her throat when she couldn't find him in the crowd, she looked in every corner but he wasn't there. Tears were threatening to spill down her face when she felt her spidey sense twitch. He was still there.
She turned around and there he was, looking at her with a questioning gaze. Her hands trembled and her lips shivered.
She walked up to him and stood there—looking at him.
"I thought you left," she told him. He looked down on her and bent his head to the side to study her.
"I did."
She got closer to him; the presence of him was burning through her.
"Why did you come back?" she whispered.
He didn't answer but she knew the answer. Because he loved her. And she wanted to scream at him that it was not true—that soulless creatures can't love. But the answer was there in his eyes. And she just melted.
She reached up to touch his face and he closed his eyes and relished the moment. She brought his head down and tentatively touched their lips.
He was eager and waiting, so she lost herself in his kiss.
The kiss surrounded her. He surrounded her. And for the moment there was no Giles telling her he was leaving, there were no money problems, there was only them. A boy and a girl who just wanted to kiss.
Rocco was surprised at her urgency. He pulled back to take a breath and she closer her eyes and leaned their foreheads together.
She smiled languidly; Rocco couldn't help but be pleased with himself.
"Spike," she moaned quietly.
"That does it!" he cried and let her go.
Buffy whimpered at the loss of touch but was shaken from her thoughts by his voice.
"Bloody ell," he groaned as he paced in front of her.
She had no idea what she had done. "What happened?" she asked.
Blue eyes blazed to glare at her.
"What happened? She wants to know what happened." He told no one in particular. "Here I am, kissing a girl whom I happen to find sodding wonderful and she's off in ninny-land kissing her long dead boyfriend!"
Buffy swallowed and looked down. Ok—so she had no clue she was kissing Rocco—in her mind it was Spike.
"Rocco...I..."
"Listen, Buffy--I get that you loved this guy, I get he did something wonderful, I get that--but, pet--you've got to let go." He placed both hand on each of her shoulders and looked at her intently. "He's not coming back, luv. He ain't..."
"Don't say that!" she screamed at him and pulled away, covering her ears.
Rocco shook his head and watched and she crouched herself in to a little ball, there in the middle of the street with passersby looking on.
"Buffy, please..." Rocco pleaded as he crouched in front of her stroking her hair.
She jerked away form him and he couldn't help but wince at the coldness of her eyes.
"You, stay--the fuck away from me, or I swear to god I'll kill you." With that she stood up and ran off towards the docks. She had business to do.
Where do
They lead to?
I used to be so
Strong alone
When I was
Standing on my own
Now I don't
Know what to do
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
She wondered when the night became so bright. How was it that she saw every shadow, every movement that flowed with the waves of the darkness?
She looked down as she walked, her small hands wrapped around the small rifle tucked inside her large leather coat.
Spike's coat had died about ten years ago; she still kept the remains of it in a small box under her bed.
So she stole the closest one to it.
Walking there in the night, while the wind hit her face, the fresh smell of the ocean so close yet so far away.
"Where are we going?" She laughed as he picked her up and started walking.
"Don't you trust me, pet?" he murmured close to her ear. She sighed and wrapped her arms around his strong neck, resting her blindfolded head lightly on his shoulder.
"Yes, take me away, far away," she smiled and kissed his neck.
She heard him chuckle. The scent hit her like a wave that crashes the sea.
"Spike?" she asked suspiciously.
"Yes, luv," he asked.
"Why are we in the ocean?" she asked, tried to peak under her blindfold.
"Hey! No peaking!" he chastised.
She giggled like a silly schoolgirl. "You didn't answer the question."
"I meant not to," he replied and she felt as they started descending a small hill.
"Don't drop me!" she cried, holding on tighter to his neck.
Spike stopped and swung her around, making her squeal with delight. "Stop!" she giggled.
"Don't drop you?" he faked a drop, making the slayer scream.
He held her in a tight embrace against his chest.
"I'll never let you go," he whispered to her, blending in the laugher and kisses that she rained on his cheek and neck.
Buffy looked ahead, eyes cold in a cold night where cold people stalked the shadows.
The boots on her feet seemed tighter, hotter.
She wished sometimes that she could walk naked, let her body shiver until she went mad with cold. Maybe then she would die. In a cold street, naked and trembling.
It seemed like a good death she lied to herself. It was moments like this when she remembered the good times in the past that she felt more naked and alone than ever.
She hated this existence, she hated what she had become, she hated the promises she made and she hated that she lived up to them.
Sometimes she wished she could remember her sister.
Then it wouldn't be as sad, she told herself.
She could never remember if her hair was brown like her mother's or blonde like hers.
Dawn.
The name taste funny in her mouth. Bitter and aggravating.
It was weak and without life...just like she had been.
The moment Dawn died things just started to change.
It began with the pictures in the living room of her house. The house she lived in five days after their death. Pictures of three happy women changed to two. Only one of them alive.
She remembered breaking all the mirrors in her house....
"Buffy please!" Angel shouted at her.
She said nothing, weaving through the house like a zombie. She grabbed her mother's mirror, the one that had been housed in Willow's room and slammed it with slayer strength on the floor.
Angel grabbed Buffy and shook her. "Stop this."
She didn't meet his gaze and wrenched his hands from her, breaking bones with her strength, making him cry out. She walked down the hall to the large family portrait hung above the table. She glared at it. She could see the girl's image fading away. Smile here. Smile gone.
She screamed at it and took the oak table in her hands, breaking away the leg and shattering the large photograph.
She hit the wall until splinters cut her skin and she bled. But she fell in love with the pain. The pain was real, her blood was real. Her sister was not.
It had all been an illusion. A lie. And she felt the walls crumbling around her.
She started sobbing, she hadn't cried this hard...since her mother had died.
She felt empty and alone. She knew she was crying out their names but she didn't care, she didn't care if Giles didn't approve or if Xander said 'I told you so' or if Willow looked at her with pity.
She wanted all that hatred to be wrenched form her soul. She wanted to feel nothing.
She felt when Angel wrapped his arms around her, rocking her back and forth.
She melted into those arms that no longer belonged to her. She wanted to be that little girl she was years ago that used to hide within his embrace. Let the whole world fall apart around her.
But she couldn't hide from herself. It was falling apart within her and no matter how long he held her or how familiar it felt, they were still gone and the emptiness burned right through her.
She wished she could remember Dawn's face. Did Dawn make her happy or make her sad? Did she annoy her or were they best of pals?
But answers took energy, energy she needed for the kill.
Killing was her calling, she was doomed to do it until the world withered and died. Bringing down the infestation that was humanity, taking her along with it.
Was I too
proud
Or just too blind?
What does it matter?
When love was in
These hands of mine
I let it shatter
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Rocco fumed as he walked to his house. He had only been in L.A. a couple of days and there he was falling in love with a reckless immortal, one that was only interested in him because he wore the face of her long lost love.
He hated this.
He reached the gate of the private sector and the guard came rushing out.
"Mr. Pickering, you'll catch the death of cold!" the guard came out.
Rocco shook his head and waved the man off. "It's a good night, Jackson--I'll be fine."
"Let me call your father, sir. He's been worried sick."
Rocco sighed and walked ahead into the three-story mansion. At least it wasn't as stuffy as it was in England.
As soon as he walked in through the large glass doors he heard Beatriz, the housemaid cry out in relief.
"Young Pickering! Were have you been, young sir?" she scolded, taking his coat, and moving him into the warmth of the house. "You're mother has been at the smelling salts for the past two days! You can't continue this behavior, sir, your father was about to call the police!"
Rocco said nothing as he was led into the parlor and forced to sit. He winced as his still-bruised ribs poked him.
"You're hurt!" She cried out pulling at the ends of his sweater.
"I'm fine, Beatriz, really." Rocco tried.
"You're most definitely not!" she gasped as she saw his black and blue abdomen wrapped in thick gauze. "Dear lord, Rockwell!"
"It's not as bad as it looks, really."
The maid glared at him. "I'm calling Doctor Stevens."
Rocco groaned and almost hid behind the large sofa when he heard his mother coming.
"Rockwell Pickering! You're going to be the death of me," she yelled at him, losing all traces of proper English society.
Rocco bowed his head and bit his lip. "Sorry, mum...I...things got complicated."
"Complicated indeed," she started to cry and Rocco hissed at the sound of her sobs. "You insist in going on about in the dead of night, frolicking with strangers and getting yourself hurt in this manner. I simply do not know what to do with you, Rockwell."
Rocco continued with the chewing of his bottom lip.
"You are an educated young man, Rockwell, from an excellent family, and yet you insist on socializing with people who do you no good, my darling." his mother sat next to him and cupped his chin.
He looked up at her, beautiful blue eyes just like his. Red and stained with the burden of a rebellious child.
"I'm sorry, mum," he said softly.
"Your father will have none of this, you know?"
Rocco's insides twisted as he imagined his father's reaction.
"Is he...Is he here?"
"I very well am."
The thunderous voice sounded from the entrance and Rocco prayed to the last saints to spare his life.
"Father." he said quietly.
His father walked quietly into the room and stood before his hurt child.
"Where were you this time?" he asked. Rocco could feel the angry vibrations seeping out of his mouth.
He took a large breath of air and met his eyes.
Oh yeah--he was mad.
"I...met someone...a girl...well a woman."
Both of his parents studied him. "A girl?" his mother asked.
Rocco nodded. "I wanted to come home, I did father. I just went out for a drink. But she was...she was. She is something else and I just wanted to spend all the time I could with her."
His father arched hairy brow at him. "Son...."
Rocco bowed his head and nodded. "I know, I shouldn't do that to a girl--but it's ok. She would never fall in love with me."
The pieces
scattered
To the wind
I'll never have
Them here again
But I'll remember
How we were
The rest of time
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy watched the three men from behind a large 55-gallon drum. Her small body molded into the shadows as she studied the small one in the middle.
Her ribs still hurt and so did her shoulders, but she had learned to ignore the pain many years ago...the pain was a reminder that she was still going.
She still was.
Silently, like an owl that strikes in the night she aimed her gun. This time there would be no distractions.
She focused her eyesight and pointed at his head.
Fingers on the trigger, legs ready to run for her life.
//BANG//
Dead body falling to the ground guns being pulled, slayer speed getting ahead and leaping out through the metal doors.
She could hear the shots around her, men screaming and running after her.
But they were human, and even badass humans came with an expiration date. She was an immortal slayer who had nothing to loose but a promise she had made long ago.
She ran with all her might. Her job was done. It was a hit and run. No personal business.
She ran all the way to the factory where she knew the boss would be at.
The vampires standing guard on the entrance saw her coming as instantly moved to the side.
"Ceasar!" she screamed out into the large open factory. From the top railings vampires started to emerge, her vampire senses sung high notes as they filled around her, surrounding her.
"Come out here and face me, you coward!"
The vampires snickered at her, growling and approaching her more menacingly.
A loud chuckle was heard and most of the minions shut up and scurried back to the dark where they came from.
From the crowd of them they parted and the large vampire came forward.
"Buffy Anne Summers, to what do I owe this pleasant surprise?" he asked smirking.
She walked right up to him and punched him.
Game faces came out and guns were pointed at her. The room stood frozen as the fate of the slayer was decided.
"Next time you want to send me a message you come to me yourself. You don't send your lackeys to beat the shit out of me when I'm drunk and unarmed. We had a deal, Caesar. I'm not your bounty-hunter."
Caesar sucked gently on the blood that was coming from his broken lips and glared down at the small girl.
"You're digging your own grave, slayer--I'd be glad to finance your funeral."
Buffy smirked at him and crossed her arms. "Look at that. Still dead and I get your support."
He growled at her. "I could have you killed right now," he said.
"Why don't you try?"
He studied her cold eyes for a moment before her signaled his men to put down their weapons. "And do you the favor?" he smiled. "No, my pretty lil' thing. Letting you live is your greatest punishment."
Buffy scowled at him, making him smile even wider.
"Sorry for you slayer, but hey! Look at the bright side. Now you have Spike to keep you company!"
Without warning the slayer punched him again, sending him staggering two feet back. "You don't say his name! Don't you dare! And that boy you saw me with—he will never be Spike, ever! So stay away form him and me. We're now even, and the next time I run into you I will dust you."
She held his gaze for a second and walked out leaving him glaring at her retreating figure.
"Should we kill 'er, boss?" Tito asked next to him.
Caesar shook his head and rubbed his aching jaw.
"No--like I said killing the bitch will be a good thing, making her live and suffer is the bad."
You are my
heart
How could I
Ever let you go?
You are my soul
I had to lose
My soul to know
How much you mean
To me, you are my heart
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy walked down the street wiping the falling tears from her cheeks.
She was tired...so tired.
She just wanted to end it all, she wished a million times that she would've never made that promise.
She found herself walking to the pier.
She loved this pier.
She walked to the end and sat down on her bench. Closing her eyes she let her soul drift with the tides.
"You seem different tonight," he murmured into her ear.
She smiled softly and sagged against him, his cold chest cooling her heated one.
She was playing softly with his curls.
"I feel different, she murmured back.
He play bit her hand. "What's the occasion?"
She swatted his mouth away and continued with the soft threading of his hair. "Us."
Spike froze and looked at her. "What?"
She locked eyes with him and took his face in her hands. "Us...you and me. Us."
He arched his eyebrow at her. "I thought there wasn't an 'us'."
She wrapped her arms around him and laid her head against his chest. He responded by holding her close.
"Seems like there is to me," she whispered.
She felt him sigh and smiled against his cold skin. "I can't wait to see everyone's face when we tell them."
He pulled her back and looked at her. She could see the fear behind his eyes, the uncertainty--she wanted to kiss all his insecurities away and tell him that it would all be different from now on. "I'm sorry, Spike."
She kissed his gaping mouth. "I know that this has been...well I don't know what it's been like for you, to have to keep your hands to yourself when you were dying to reassure me or to kiss me. When Willow would suggest a guy to check out at the bronze, when you saw me dancing with someone else and let it eat you inside. When Xander would make one of his unnecessary comments about your devotion and your love and I know you just wanted to rip his head off." She smiled and he returned it. "But most of all, to be able to walk down the street like we always do and just hold handsshow affectionroll over and find me there in the morning"
Spike broke eye contact with her; she could feel his body stiffen under hers.
"This was not meant to hurt you" She kissed his bare chest. "I want to"
He looked back at her, his eyes hopeful and wide. "What do you want?"
They shared an uncomfortable moment, until she leaned forward and kissed him. "You make me feel alive. When I'm with you, I'm real. Thank you for being patient with me."
He nodded a bit disappointed that he didn't get the words he's been dying to hear for almost a year now. "Right then, we're an us."
"Spike?"
"Hum?"
"Look at me," she told him.
He did and she smiled at him. "Do you love me?"
He arched his eyebrow at her and studied her for a second. "You know I do."
"Do you trust me?"
He studied her again. "YesI do."
"Then trust in this, then. Ask me again someday—you might get the answer you're looking for."
"Buffy I don't."
She silenced him with a kiss.
"Ask me again—trust me in that."
She didn't know how long she had been sitting there. Before she knew it the sun was peaking in the horizon.
She remembered all those moments, those thick emotional depths that lived in her heart. Those little seconds that she would cherish for the rest of her life. Those that made her whole.
She was ready to say goodbye once and for all, to look forward to the sun shinning in her hair once more. To close the pages to her love for Spike from so long ago.
She really was.
Until he sat down next to her.
She looked at him.
"Why are you drawn to me?" she asked him.
Rocco shook his head and lit a cigarette offering her one.
She took it between his lips and smiled at the coming dawn.
"I haven't seen it over fifteen years."
Rocco studied her for a moment and nodded.
"No wonder you're pale."
Buffy smirked and watched the lighting sky.
"Good thing I'm in a good mood, I would've punched you otherwise."
Rocco smiled. "Good thing then, pet."
They sat in silence.
"Buffy, I need to tell you something."
She didn't tear her gaze from the horizon. "Then say it."
Rocco turned to look at her and took a deep breath. "I know peoplewell my family knows people and"
Buffy exhaled her smoke and turned to look at him, frowning. "Listen, rock-boy I've heard more bad news in my life than what you can imagine. Spit is out, no need to be shy."
Rocco stuttered and nodded. "Right, then. Well, I know this woman who canwell she canOh bloody ell! Buffy, she can bring Spike back."
I think I see
you everywhere
Isn't that crazy?
I still reach out to feel you there lying beside me
I've learned a lot since you've been gone
About what I am, and what I want
I know I only want to be in love with you
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TBC...