Chapter IV: To the Night

Christian looked down at the cheap wine, swallowing against the bitterness in his throat. Sighing, he eased his head down against his hand. Why did everything seem so wrong? And what had drawn him back here towards the darker side of life that every town held. . .even one so seemingly small and harmless as this one. His gaze caught the dark-haired girl once again, whose downcast eyes revealed everything about her life. Satine had been a courtesan like that. . .a prostitute. Selling herself for money. He couldn't pretend it hadn't been that way, couldn't sing the reality of it away. Nor could he pray for the past to become just a figment of his imagination. His wife. How many men had tasted the sweetness of her lips, the tenderness of her voice as she spoke to him in the dark?

Christian took his first sip of the wine. The buzzing sensation that blurred the edges of everything in the bar would soon follow, and he could spend the night in a drunk oblivion.

Scuse me, a strange, lilting feminine voice said to him.
Christian glanced up wearily.

The dark-haired prostitute raised her own glass in a mock salute and sang in a dark, throaty voice.

Here's to the night!
Here's to romance!
To those unafraid of taking a chance!

She paused, and then leaned in close to him.

I believe you are expecting me?

Christian felt the shock of recognition and a strange sort of peace come over him. A thousand images of Satine came together in a vision. . .her laughing, crying, dancing, kissing, making love, sitting, sleeping. . . Almost as if his mind were elsewhere, he answered the girl in song.

I think I've taken enough for one day!
And I have learned it to my cost
It's not the fun that it might be
Once you have lost!

He placed a few bills on the table. Maybe they would mean the girl could spend the night in peace, perhaps with someone she loved rather than selling herself. He knew the cruelty of her life, and perhaps. . .perhaps he could do a little thing to make it better.

Thank you, he said, leaving the bar and the astonished girl behind him. He walked out with a curious spring in his step. He was going home to his beloved wife. . .home.

Satine lay silently in bed, surrounded by the darkness. She had never noticed how large the bed seemed without Christian beside her. She closed her eyes in pain, and hugged his pillow close to her, drinking in the scent of him that she loved. . .the warm, spicy, tender scent that seemed to mark Christian. She shook her head. Never before had she been so utterly and completely linked to a person that she felt this emptiness inside her once they were gone. She rose abruptly, letting the covers slide away as the clock chimed twelve. She sank down to the floor in front of the dying embers of the fire.

She couldn't lie awake in bed and pretend to herself that she didn't mind. She did. At one point in her life, men could have treated her like dirt and she would have swallowed the pain and remain indifferent. No more.

Oceans apart, it seems that way
And I slowly go insane
I hear your voice in my mind,
But it doesn't stop the pain.
If we can't be together,
How can we say forever?

Satine stared deep into the glowing coals as a fiery piece broke off and tumbled down against the cast iron gate. Her face was thrown into contrasting light and shadow, but the sadness she felt was somehow alleviated by her next thoughts. She loved Christian, and he loved her. Nothing could change that, not sorrows or anger or even death. They had promised their lives to each other, to follow through times of fear, and to wait even through times of trouble.

Wherever you go,
Whatever you do,
I will be right here waiting for you.
Whatever it takes,
Or how my heart breaks,
I will be right here waiting for you.

Christian's voice rang out as he entered the room, and Satine turned in surprise.

I wonder how we can survive this romance
But in the end if I'm with you, I'll take the chance!

 she whispered, standing and gathering her robe about herself.

he said tenderly, resting his forehead against hers. God, I'm so sorry. . .

No, I am, she protested, gathering him in her arms. He held her closely, and they sank down on the chaise together.

he said softly. I love you so much. . .I'm so sorry. I've been so wrong by not telling you about this. . .I was just afraid for you.

You don't have to be anymore, she whispered, leaning her head against his shoulder. I'm well, Christian. I'm going to live.

The joy was apparent in his face and voice as embraced her. Oh, thank God. . .oh, thank God. . . They sat there, together, for a long time, while the fire burned out, and Satine stirred gently.

she whispered, drawing him back from the silent reverie they had been sharing.



In response, she kissed him, long and tenderly. He touched her cheek gently, almost timidly, and the sweet innocence of the gesture awoke Satine's soul.

I love you, she said quietly.

I love you, he echoed. They stood, together, and walked over the window.

Look at the stars, Satine said softly. I used to think they were diamonds. Christian?

What is it, darling?

Would you write a song for us tonight?

Christian did not respond at first, but only rested his hands lightly on her shoulders. After a moment, he hummed a tune briefly and sang, in what Satine thought of as his poet's voice, the voice that had captured her heart.

Listen as the wind blows from across the great divide
Voices trapped in yearning, memories trapped in time
The night is my companion, and solitude my guide
Would I spend forever here and not be satisfied?

He turned to look at Satine, who stood illuminated by a shaft of pale starlight. Her dark red hair was in strict contrast to her white nightdress, and her pale face was very sweet in the night. He took both her hands in his and let his song take shape.

And I would be the one
To hold you down
Kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away
And after, I'd wipe away the tears
Just close your eyes, dear.

Satine followed suit, her beautiful soprano voice lending a silver tranquility to the words.

Through this world I've stumbled
So many times betrayed
Trying to find an honest word to find
The truth enslaved.

She ran her hands up his chest, and he drew in a sharp breath.

Oh, you speak to me in riddles,
You speak to me in rhymes.
My body aches to breathe your breath,
Your words keep me alive.

Christian kissed her, a kiss filled with all the pent-up longing and passion that had been pushed away for the sake of her health. Satine sank deep in his kiss, feeling herself lost and found all in the same moment.

Just close your eyes, dear, Christian whispered to her as they found themselves on the bed.

Afterwards, Satine found herself lying in Christian's arms as he slept. She was too happy to sleep right away, and she smiled mysteriously at the ceiling as she quietly sang to herself.

And I would be the one
To hold you down
Kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away
And after, I'd wipe away the tears
Just close your eyes, dear.

Christian awoke briefly during her song, and drew her closer to him.

Just close your eyes, dear.
~-~-~-
Author's Note:
I don't own anyone or anything (except for sundry minor characters), and it's all used without permission, but please don't sue me, as I need money for college tution and cash to supply my book addiction.

Songs used: (W/out permission, blah, blah)
Lucy Meets Jekyll--Jekyll and Hyde
Right Here Waiting--Richard Marx
--Sarah McLachlan

Song Note: I have changed a few small things on some of the songs in this fic, like pronouns or minor wording, to make it fit the story better. Just in case you were wondering. ;-)