Never Knew An Angel
Disclaimer: You know I don't own Final Fantasy or the song that made me cry so I could write this which incidentally is: `Hear You Me' by Jimmy Eat World.
Author's Note: A song I heard made me cry the other day and I decided to write a story about the death of Raine and how Squall never knew her.
I never knew you. You left so long ago. One last touch and I was gone, torn from your arms. One vision of your kind face and all I can do is cry. You were never there. When other people told me about their mothers and I had to leave because I never had one.
I dream about you sometimes, you always watch me when I sleep and I call out your name. I yell, `Mother!' The word seems so foreign to me, I've never said it before. To hear my own voice say that word makes me cry. When I look for you across the sea, it starts to rain and as I look up at the rainclouds, I see that vision of your face.
I've never been able to talk to you. What was your favourite colour? Movie? Song? Food? Were you in love when I was born? Where you married? Did you love me?
I can't say I've never wanted to see you because I have. I don't even know where your grave is. I hear you owned a bar. What was is called? Did you have fun there? I can't believe I'll never see you. . . . . .
Why did you call me Squall? Was there a reason? Did you know someone called Squall or was it just a name you liked? Did you say anything to me before you left? I wouldn't have understood but did you tell me you loved me? Were you the first one to tell me that?
If you had known you were going to die, would you have changed anything about your life? What was your childhood like? Did you live in a nice house? Were your parents good to you?
I don't even know how old you were when you died.
I have no one to turn to when Rinoa and I have an argument. When Zell nearly chokes on hotdogs or when Selphie falls over. You won't know about my life. You won't be there when I get married. Or when Rinoa has our first child, I can't give my child a picture and say, `This was your grandmother.' I have no pictures. When my son or daughter's friends do a project on the family history, where will you be? I don't know anything. If you were hear, you'd tell me that I'd be okay, wouldn't you?
Sometimes you would tell me about your life. If I said something was hard, you would say, `When I was a kid, we had to walk five miles a day. . . .' and I would yawn and say, `Yeah, yeah mum, I know. . . ` I'll never be able to say that.
You died because of me. I was born and that killed you. One last touch of your skin and you died. Never to see me grow up, graduate school, get married, have children. I'll never know you.
I wish you were here, I would sell my soul to see that vision again, it is beginning to fade. The only memory I have of my mother is fading. Soon you will just be another dream that I forget in the morning. Soon you will be just another angel on the wind who never sees the daylight. You look at me and wonder why I can't remember and I wonder why I have this feeling of guilt and as I wonder who my mother was I just shake it off because I have forgotten.
Are you still watching me? Are you still there? Maybe you are standing next to me right now brushing my hair from my tear-stained eyes and whispering, `It'll be okay.' Then you hold me like you once did. Then as I wake up you disappear again. But you'll come again when I cry again, when I need to see that vision, when I need to see that angel. I never thought I'd know and angel, but I do. My mother.
Author's Note: *sniff sniff* Did it make you cry, I had to listen to the song that made me cry to keep the emotion going. Thankyou for reading and please R+R to make me feel better.
Disclaimer: You know I don't own Final Fantasy or the song that made me cry so I could write this which incidentally is: `Hear You Me' by Jimmy Eat World.
Author's Note: A song I heard made me cry the other day and I decided to write a story about the death of Raine and how Squall never knew her.
I never knew you. You left so long ago. One last touch and I was gone, torn from your arms. One vision of your kind face and all I can do is cry. You were never there. When other people told me about their mothers and I had to leave because I never had one.
I dream about you sometimes, you always watch me when I sleep and I call out your name. I yell, `Mother!' The word seems so foreign to me, I've never said it before. To hear my own voice say that word makes me cry. When I look for you across the sea, it starts to rain and as I look up at the rainclouds, I see that vision of your face.
I've never been able to talk to you. What was your favourite colour? Movie? Song? Food? Were you in love when I was born? Where you married? Did you love me?
I can't say I've never wanted to see you because I have. I don't even know where your grave is. I hear you owned a bar. What was is called? Did you have fun there? I can't believe I'll never see you. . . . . .
Why did you call me Squall? Was there a reason? Did you know someone called Squall or was it just a name you liked? Did you say anything to me before you left? I wouldn't have understood but did you tell me you loved me? Were you the first one to tell me that?
If you had known you were going to die, would you have changed anything about your life? What was your childhood like? Did you live in a nice house? Were your parents good to you?
I don't even know how old you were when you died.
I have no one to turn to when Rinoa and I have an argument. When Zell nearly chokes on hotdogs or when Selphie falls over. You won't know about my life. You won't be there when I get married. Or when Rinoa has our first child, I can't give my child a picture and say, `This was your grandmother.' I have no pictures. When my son or daughter's friends do a project on the family history, where will you be? I don't know anything. If you were hear, you'd tell me that I'd be okay, wouldn't you?
Sometimes you would tell me about your life. If I said something was hard, you would say, `When I was a kid, we had to walk five miles a day. . . .' and I would yawn and say, `Yeah, yeah mum, I know. . . ` I'll never be able to say that.
You died because of me. I was born and that killed you. One last touch of your skin and you died. Never to see me grow up, graduate school, get married, have children. I'll never know you.
I wish you were here, I would sell my soul to see that vision again, it is beginning to fade. The only memory I have of my mother is fading. Soon you will just be another dream that I forget in the morning. Soon you will be just another angel on the wind who never sees the daylight. You look at me and wonder why I can't remember and I wonder why I have this feeling of guilt and as I wonder who my mother was I just shake it off because I have forgotten.
Are you still watching me? Are you still there? Maybe you are standing next to me right now brushing my hair from my tear-stained eyes and whispering, `It'll be okay.' Then you hold me like you once did. Then as I wake up you disappear again. But you'll come again when I cry again, when I need to see that vision, when I need to see that angel. I never thought I'd know and angel, but I do. My mother.
Author's Note: *sniff sniff* Did it make you cry, I had to listen to the song that made me cry to keep the emotion going. Thankyou for reading and please R+R to make me feel better.