What Have We Wrought
By Yugogirl
Part 2/3
Lily pored over text after text, learning far more about the Dark Arts than she'd ever cared to. As her seventh month of pregnancy slipped into the eighth, she became monomaniacal in her research. Her sleep was restless, her eyes, tired and bloodshot.
James could not help but be worried, seeing the changes she'd undergone. When he'd voiced his concerns, she reassured him that it was due to the strains her pregnancy had placed on her body. As he'd rubbed her aching back, and helped her to elevate her swollen feet, he readily believed her explanation. He offered what he thought were words of comfort. "At least you've only one more month to go on."
"One more month," she echoed, the words a whip to her flagging thoughts.
Next day, she nearly had it. In a dusty tome from the depths of the restricted section, the words jumped from the page: "Information on the manipulation of the unborn may be found in the text, 'Medicus Foetale Dars Ars'." She frantically searched, near panic when she could find no record of the text at the public library. She admonished herself, "Think!"
Well, of course they wouldn't leave such potentially dangerous material out where just anyone might come across it. Dark wizards tended to guard and hoard their dubious treasures. What she needed, then, was a dark wizard. The smile that slowly crossed her face was not a pleasant one. It just so happened that she knew where she could find a practitioner of the dark arts.
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Next day, she spent a long time getting ready, before leaving the house. Her hair and makeup were perfect. Her dress was a long, flowing, dark green with a style that complemented her pregnancy-altered figure.
Not a hint of the nervousness she was feeling was revealed, when she arrived at her destination. She knocked at the door, even though she was well aware that the occupant of the house had wards which had already alerted him of her presence.
The door was opened before she could finish lowering her hand, which had just let go of the knocker. She couldn't help the gasp of dismay at the site which greeted her. "Severus!"
She had befriended him, back when they had both attended Hogwarts. She took pity on the friendless, moody boy, who was so obviously smitten with her, flattered by his attentions. Although she made it clear that she didn't return his feelings, he hadn't quite gotten the message. Once she'd announced her engagement to James Potter, he'd been devastated. He'd willingly embraced the dark arts, and she hadn't seen him since.
She was appalled at the changes that time had wrought. The man who stood before her was a hollow, poorly made copy of the darkly handsome boy she'd known. No longer Severus, but Snape. His clothing hung loose on his emaciated frame. His once lustrous hair hung lank and greasy in his face, badly in need of a trim. His expression was unreadable as he greeted his visitor. "Lily." He did not invite her in.
She was suddenly nervous, intensely aware of the absolute necessity of finding the right words to move this man to do what she so desperately needed. If it required groveling, by god, she'd grovel with the best of them. "May I come in?"
His face still carefully neutral, Snape replied, "If I had any sense at all, I'd send you on your way." With a sigh, some of the haughty stiffness seeped out of his spine, making him appear less threatening. "However, when it comes to you, I still seem to find myself decidedly lacking the ability to reject you as thoroughly as you rejected me." He stepped aside, waving her in ahead of him. The sound of the door slamming echoed in the cavernous entryway as it closed behind them.
The interior of the house was as neglected as its occupant. A layer of dust coated everything. Snape led the way to a sitting room. Fortunately, the furniture was protected by dust covers. He removed the covers from two of the chairs, gesturing Lily to a seat. Snape spoke, the mocking tone of his voice making it clear that he knew the falseness of his surmise. "So, did you finally come to your senses, and decide to leave Potter for your one true love?"
Feeling the time left to accomplish her task passing all too quickly, Lily wasted no words in returning his banter. She came straight to the point. "You know that James and I are still together. I come to you, because, quite frankly, you are my only hope." She held her hands protectively over her belly. "I need access to a book. A book on the dark arts."
Snape's brow lifted at this, intrigued. When she did not immediately continue, he prompted, "Indeed? Do go on."
"I've exhausted nearly all of the resources available to me. I've only a month, or less, to find what I'm seeking. Or, my baby will die."
If Lily expected Snape to be moved by her pathetic little statement, she was in for a surprise. He was moved, all right: to anger. Aiming to cut deep, he responded. "So, you want me to help you to save Potter's child. Well, I've always believed in the time-honored tradition of drowning defective puppies at birth. Surely any child of Potter's would meet the same criteria."
He sat back, seemingly without feeling, waiting to observe the results of his words. He watched as Lily held back the angry words which immediately tried to escape. He watched her emotions as they flitted across her face. The anger was quickly replaced by fear, and then by a despair which seemed to flow over her and swallow her whole. God, he knew that feeling himself, all too well.
Even heavy with child, Lily was still the most breathtakingly beautiful woman he'd ever known. He watched as her agony silently consumed her. She wrapped her arms around herself, curling her body protectively around her unborn child. She was silent in her grief, for a moment. Then, she looked up, her face wet with tears. Her voice had the awful ring of hopelessness he'd heard himself, all too many times. Her voice shook with unreleased sobs, as she choked out, "He's my son, too."
Snape closed his eyes, so that he wouldn't have to look at her ravaged face. Dammit, he'd been doing so well at convincing himself that he longer had any emotions. All it took was a visit from Lily, and all those nasty feelings came crashing down around him. He opened his eyes, admitting defeat. He spoke quietly, as if to himself, "I never could refuse you anything." And, for the moment, it was all worth it, as he watched the joyous hope on her face replace the utter despair.
Lily quickly informed him what it was she needed, before he could change his mind.
As he led Lily to the door, he was distracted, his thoughts already on the task at hand. "I have an idea or two, of where to look. Expect to hear from me within a fortnight."
Lily quelled a sudden urge to fling her arms around Severus, in gratitude, fearing that he might take it the wrong way. Instead, she wrapped her hand around his arm, squeezing surprisingly tight. Unable to put what she was feeling into words, her tear-bright eyes said all that needed to be said as she gazed into his face, uttering a heart-felt, "Thank you."
As the next week went by, and led into the following week, Lily continued her search. Although she had great confidence in Severus, it didn't hurt to occupy her time with research. Finally, after twelve days, she received an owl. It directed her to a park, and a certain tree where a package could be found.
She had no trouble reaching her destination. When she was certain that she was unobserved, she waved her wand, with a murmured, "secretus." The formerly invisible package was revealed to her.
She wasted no time in opening it. The book was totally unremarkable, with a plain, worn black cover. Severus had thoughtfully marked the significant chapter. It would require an incantation, performed in a graveyard at midnight during the waning moon. In addition, a complex potion would need to be prepared. Severus had thoughtfully noted where some of the more obscure ingredients could be purchased. She patted her distended belly, as she read. There was a disturbing bit about an animal sacrifice, but it was not beyond her abilities. She patted her belly as the baby shifted position. "Hold on, Harry. It's nearly time."
Calculating the phases of the moon, as well as preparation time, she should be ready within a week's time. The park had grown dark around her as she read, the sun obscured by dark, threatening clouds. Lily did not notice, her thoughts on the task at hand. She gently closed the book. "Bless you, Severus Snape."