Disclaimer: how may times am I gonna have to write this? I don't own FFIX! End of story!


(Did your mother ever tell you that the boy who picks on you at school is really the one that has a crush on you? Well, this is sort of the case, but it's a little more dangerous than that. ^_^)


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"Amarant? AMARANT!"


The bounty hunter woke with a start, feeling a sharp pain on his cheek. Almost immediately, he was fully awake, and--


Looking into Lani's irritated face.


Damn.


He'd fallen asleep again, in the gargant's basket. Just as a second thought, Amarant reminded himself to drink more coffee and less booze before long trips. Smirking to hide his embarrassment, he scratched the back of his neck and stood up, "Dammit, Lani. Don't slap me."


The bounty huntress snickered and put her hands on her hips, "Yeah, I know. It's like provoking an enraged bull. A very ugly one."


Amarant couldn't help it. That sure as hell isn't what you said that night in Treno. He grinned inwardly as he formulated a good insult he could use against her...later. Maybe.


"Hello?" Lani demanded, waving a hand in front of his face. "Amarant! Wake up. We've reached Alexandria."


The bounty hunter brushed her hand away, half-sneering, "I've noticed."


Growling to herself, the bounty huntress leapt to her feet and then onto the platform of Gargant Roo. She had to literally race to catch up with Amarant's retreating form. She jogged along side him, and then stepped out in front.


Amarant stopped short, and glared down at her.


"OK," said Lani, taking a small breath. "I just had a newsflash. The last time I saw any of these people was when I tried to kill them all. What are the odds that they'll welcome me into their little party with open arms?"


For once, Amarant grinned inwardly, "Don't worry," he joked and crossed his arms. "I'll protect you from the big bad monkey."


"Oooh!" Lani hissed, "That is SO unlike you! Amarant, you're scaring me."


Amarant blinked, and began to walk again. "No half as much as you're scaring me."


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"This is crazy – he won't come."


Queen Dagger glared hostily at the genome, Zidane Tribal. Her gaze was cold enough to match the Ice Cavern. Slowly, she stood up from counting the dinner plates lining the royal table. She folded her arms defiantly and bored a hole through a head with her eyes.


"Um-" Zidane took a step back, immediately feeling sorry for even saying it. "Or...maybe he will. But, I mean, he hates me and all, and he might be, you know angry that I invited him this year, you know...after ignoring him for all that time..."


"Zidane," Dagger said through gritted teeth, "You're the King of Alexandria. Zidane Tribal the I, and one day, you're going to look down at a little replica of yourself, and say 'Zidane Arc Tribal II, you have a great mother, because she managed to keep all of her friends while I acted like a loner. Never look to me for advice. I'm only a-'"


"All right!" pleaded Zidane. "I get the point! Geez..."


Dagger lowered her eyes to count the plates again.


"Hey, Dagger..."


The queen looked up again, "Hmmm?"


"You were serious about my little replica?"


The guards standing at the dining hall's entrance exchanged looks, as the room they watched echoes with the skeptical sounds of a genome being cuffed.


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"'Hello...I know we met on the wrong terms last time...' No, that's stupid. 'H-Hey, before we start...can't we be...friends?' Uh...too desperate...'Hi?' Too short..."


Amarant ignored her for the last time, as they continued to climb the spiraling staircase. Just as the two reached the top, Lani stopped short in surpirse.


"We have to jump that?" she asked dubiously, pointing to the shifting stretch of concrete, continually moving to create a bridge...or not creating a bridge.


"You're a bounty hunter, Lani. There are greater obstacles out there," the red-haired man drawled, and without warning, stepped onto one side of the bridge, just as it flew past. After it had rotated around, he stepped off again. He turned to face the hesitating Lani, and lifted his arms slightly in irrelevance. "See? No jumping required, you sad, lazy woman."


"Oh, shut up," she hissed, and stepped daintily onto the moving platform. Amarant watched with smug satisfaction as she struggled to keep her balance, as it rotated around. Just as she reach him, she almost fell over the side. But he, of course, without thinking, grabbed her by the shoulders and swung her around in front of him. He gave her a shove towards the door.


"Now march."


Lani turned around to gape at him, but Amarant gave her another gentle push. "Move it, the party starts soon."


"Oh," the bounty huntress said with disbelief, and planted herself firmly in front of him. "As if you care."


"If I say I care, I care," the bounty hunter sighed. "Get a move on!"


Lani backed away to avoid another shove, but slowly, a grin crossed her face. "Ooooh! Amarant, you saved you life!" she teased.


"For all that's-" the red-haired man began, and covered his eye, expressing his dead disapproval.


"Hehehe," the bounty huntress giggled, and turned herself around, pretending to walk like a prissy noblewoman. "Help me Amarant, please! Oh, I think I stubbed my toesies! Kiss it better Ammy-poo! Pwease? Oh, I'm a damsel in distress!"


Amarant gritted his teeth, "I'll give you something to be distressed about, damsel, if you don't go, or get out of my way."


"Hey!"


Lani's cry of protest rang throughout the tower, as the tall red-haired man slung her over his shoulder, and proceeded through the doorway. The ominous sound of rock shifting against rock echoed, and then stopped.


Everything went silent.


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(Yeah, so it's short. Sue me. ^_^ Anyway, I wanna keep this up, so please, peeps, review!)