Don't own Digimon! Anywayz enjoy…
Chapter 5: Whatever
Jealousy, Friendship or love?
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We had made camp in the safety of the forest and Tai was still unconscious. Joe had done a good job at clearing his bloody wounds but he still didn't look so good. His once tanned face was now as pale as my own skin. It is now late at night and I was on night watch. I was sitting by the fire where Tai lay. I stared into the fire thinking. Why? Why did Tai save my no good life? I was not the important member of the team! Tai is! He almost killed himself to save me. ME!
I felt my eyes beginning to tire but I would not fall asleep on the job! I had to make sure Tai was going to be all right. I wanted to be the first person he saw when he opens his eyes. Nevertheless, if I do that then he will know that I care! That I actually show feelings! Therefore, I must not. The pride thing and all.
It was getting late and I felt myself begin to nod off. However, a movement jolted me awake again. I looked at Tai's body. Na I couldn't have seen him move. I was right. He was moving. I went and sat by his side and looked at his hand twitching. I looked up to his pale face and to my amazement; Tai slowly opened his eyes.
"Tai? Can you hear me?" I whispered as Tai fully opened his eyes.
"Matt" He said quietly "Are…you…ok?" I couldn't believe it! Here he is lying badly injured and he asked me if I was ok!?
"Yeah, yeah I am thanks to you" I replied as I smiled. Tai weakly smiled back at me. Tai's face suddenly turned to discomfort and I panicked.
"What's wrong!?" I asked as Tai moaned a little.
"It hurts" he replied.
"What hurts?" I asked worriedly.
"My hole body" he answered in pain.
"Is they're anything I can do to help," I said starting to panic.
"No, don't worry about me" Tai replied trying to act brave.
"Are you sure?" I asked. I am bothered about him you know.
"Why are you caring so much Matt? I thought you hated me! " Said Tai. Oh shit he has noticed. Think I hate him. I hate him!
"I'm sorry. I still hate you, its just… never mind" I mumbled. Oh Matt wells done you have done it now! Stupid aren't you?! I must get away. I walked away from where Tai lay I didn't want to make a friend and let Tai see me cry. I was interrupted.
"Matt? Have you been crying?" said the noticing, bastard Tai. I didn't turn back to look at him.
"No!" I shouted. I ran a bit further away to do the rest of my night watch. I couldn't help crying now. Of course, Tai had noticed.
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I found myself somewhere else in the forest when I woken. I suddenly remembered what happened last night. Another stupid thing that I have done! I let my emotions get the better of me and not only that I left Tai by himself when he needed me! BAKA! I am such a baka!
I thought I should get back to camp, as the group will be wondering where I am and TK would be worried.
I walked into the clearing of camp when I saw everyone acting in a panic. I saw TK crying so I ran over to him.
"MATT!" TK cried as he flung himself into my arms.
"What's going on?" I asked him.
"It's Tai!" he replied while still sobbing. "He, he had an attack!"
"What!? An attack?" I looked at him puzzled. As I was talking to TK, Mimi came over to us.
"Tai had a fit" Mimi filled in "While you was off doing your own THING! Tai had a fit and he stopped breathing!" Mimi said sobbing slightly.
I was shocked and ashamed of myself. This is my fault. I should not of left Tai.
"Is he ok?" I asked Mimi.
"What do you think!?" Mimi snapped at me as Sora then came over. However, not with a warm welcome either! She slapped me around the face. I was still in shock as I held my right cheek where she slapped me.
"YOUR SUCH A JERK!" she shouted at me "TAI COULD HAVE DIED! BUT THANKS TO JOE HE IS STILL ALIVE!"
"Look, I'm sorry" I apologized but Sora wasn't having it.
"No that's not good enough! Why did you leave him?" she asked me. My mind went blank. What could I say? I couldn't say the real reason. She would laugh at me. I have to say something quick!
"I, err…?" Nice going BAKA! Sora then glared at me. She was about to say something when she was interrupted.
"It's…not…his fault!" Sora turned round and I looked to where the voice came from. It was Tai! What is he doing!?
"Tai how can you say that!?" Sora questioned.
Tai was still lying on the ground still as weak as ever. He coughed slightly before he answered.
"Cause it was my fault" he replied. I could not believe what he was saying!
"Tai it is my fault not yours!" I protested. Tai shock his head slightly.
"No it's not, it's not anybody's fault" he said rather tiredly "It's mine for giving up too soon". I walked over to Tai and kneeled down to him.
"What are you saying?" I asked quite concerned.
"I was giving up" he replied weakly. Giving up? What? He means that he wanted to die. I'm confused. I didn't know what to say to him. I just sighed. I put my head in one of my hands.
"Hey guys just let this drop? Tai is alive that's all that matters right?" explained Joe.
"I guess your right," said Sora.
"I think we have to keep moving" ordered Tai. I think he was trying to change the subject.
"NO! You can't not in your condition," said Izzy.
"Lets stay here at camp, Tai would be able to rest" ordered Joe.
"Yeah okay" I agreed. Agreed? Oh no I'm kinda mixing in with the group!
"I will go and collect some firewood, anyone want to come with?" asked Joe.
"I will!" shouted out Mimi.
"Matt?" Sora whispered in my ear.
"What?" I said coldly.
"Err… I am sorry about me shouting at you! I was just shocked about the state Tai's in" explained Sora.
"Whatever" I muttered.
Sora then walked away and sat with the rest of the group.
I sat myself down where I was standing. I sighed heavily and thought about what Tai just said.
How can he believe he was responsible? It was not his fault. It was mine! I was the one who was going to be hit by Myotismon's attack then Tai stood in front of it! Then I left him on his own when I wondered off during night watch! I'm so fucked up. I punched my fist into the ground.
"Its all my bloody fault" I whispered in between a few punches.
"Shit!" I cursed allowed as I realized how much pain I was causing towards my fist.
"What's wrong Matt?" Tai asked in a number of breaths.
"Huh!? Oh nothing" I muttered. I didn't really want to talk to Tai right now.
"Please tell me Matt" he pleaded.
"Look" I said while getting up and going to sit where he was lying.
"What?" he asked again.
"I need to ask you something. Tai why did you risk your life to save mine? My life is worthless towards yours. You know that and I know that. So why?" I asked in curiosity.
"Well you see I'm the leader and it's my place to protect others. Besides I couldn't just let you just hit by Myotismon's attack could I?" Tai explained.
"But I thought you hated me?" I said as if in question.
"No. It might always seem that way but really, it isn't. I know deep down inside that you are my friend Matt and I know you are friends with me deep down inside you too" said Tai.
"Oh Tai, I had no idea. I'm so sorry for you getting like this man" I apologized.
"It's not your fault Matt" reassured Tai.
"Yes it is. Don't you get it? Tai listen to me. It is my fault! I know it is. It is my fault that I got trapped in Myotismon's castle in the first place, then you came to rescue me. As we were escaping Myotismon found us again, and it was my fault that you jumped in front of me to block the attack! Its all my fault!" I said getting a little worked up about it. I felt the tears welling up in my eyes. I tried to blink them away. Nevertheless, a tear escaped.
"Come on Matt don't start getting upset and cry. Please Matt. This is none of your fault!" Tai protested.
"Yes it is! I will not take no for an answer! I feel so guilty. I care for you Tai you could have died!" I whispered in despair. OH nice going baka now he is going to no you like him.
"Huh? You actually care for me?" Tai asked in a surprised tone.
"Well, umm, you know as a friend. Right?" I said nervously. I sweat dropped.
"Yeah I suppose" Tai said as if in disappointment.
"What's up Taichi?" I covered up my mouth. Did I just say Taichi? Oh god. What's he going to think now?
"Nothing" he muttered. I sighed in relief of him not noticing that I called him Taichi. Why that bothered me so much I do not know! I am confused totally.
"Err Tai?" I asked nervously. I cannot be his enemy forever so I have to say something.
"Yeah what is it?" Tai asked.
"Well I was wondering if you like wanna be friends or something. However I cannot promise you that the fighting would stop. He he he!" I asked as my hand started to switch.
Tai's face turned into one of those huge grins that go from ear to ear.
"Would I?" he stated in total amount of happiness. "I feel like jumping for joy!" he shouted.
The entire gang had turned their head towards Tai and I.
I began to notice Tai's eyes welling up with tears. They were released from those chocolate brown eyes of his. Nevertheless I was pretty sure he wasn't crying in sorrow but in happiness. Happy for our declaration of friendship that had been lost deep inside our hearts for so long but was then found again. Sora came running over to us. She always thinks of the worst.
"Tai what's wrong you in pain?" she said in worry. Yeah that was her problem she is always too protective over Tai. I wonder if she has a thing for him?
"Nothing is wrong Sora. I'm happy!" Tai said still with a smile stretched across his face.
"I don't understand, but you're crying" she whispered.
"Look, I'm crying with happiness because me and Matt our now officially friends!" he exclaimed.
"Oh. I'm so happy for you guys as well!" Sora smiled then hugged both of us at the same time.
"Err Sora sorry to bother the happy moment but you are kinda crushing me to death!" I explained in-between gasps of air. Sora suddenly let go of us both.
Sora flushed with embarrassment. "Sorry about that. He he he!" she laughed nervously.
"No need for an apology" Tai chirped.
"I am so glad that you two have become friends! It makes me so happy!" Sora then smiled at us.
"Don't expect the fights to just go away Tai. I promise you that there will be a few fights in the future!" I joked.
Tai lay back down and ignored my joke. "If you don't mind guys I'm kinda sleepy so if you can leave me in peace to rest. I will be grateful," said Tai with a yawn.
"Yeah whatever!" I muttered.
TBC