Disclaimer: The Night World is the property of L.J. Smith.
Spoilers: None so far it is based on the Night World Series but I don't spoil any of the books, just the Night World concept really.
Author's Notes: Thank you again to Mandy for reviewing even though I know you don't like this story as much as Bound by Flame. I am still working on the sequel and Des and Gwern are going to be in it after all.
Part 7.
Emma curled up in her bed burying herself in her duvet. Midir had walked her home a few hours earlier. Her parents had just assumed she'd been at The Rising Moon or one of the girls' houses so she didn't have any explaining to do. Unfortunately she did still have homework; it was extremely hard to concentrate on algebra and sonnets when you'd just found your soulmate and fallen in love. Suddenly all that school stuff didn't seem so important. She finally got it done even though it took her almost an hour longer than usual.
Now curled up in the warmth of her bed Emma was worried. When she was with Midir things became clear, singular and nothing else seemed to matter but the truth was she was in love with someone who was hated by the people she cared about. They wouldn't understand how she felt about him and she couldn't hide if from them forever, it wasn't fair to them and it wasn't fair to him. What the hell was she going to do?
She really didn't want to have to choose between Midir and her friends; she couldn't do that but then maybe she wouldn't be given a choice. Maybe her friends would just stop talking to her as soon as they found out; maybe Midir would get sick of waiting for her to tell people and leave her. She had to make a choice like it or not and she was definitely not liking it.
At the end of school the next day Emma dragged herself on to the bus feeling horrible. She felt drained and basically worn out. She wanted to throw herself into the seat beside Midir and let him comfort her but she couldn't. She couldn't tell her friends what was wrong with her so they couldn't help her.
She didn't know what she was going to do. She felt torn and tired as if she hadn't slept in days. Finding your soulmate was supposed to be something great, something amazing and it was; it truly was but not being able to share that with her friends; to suddenly have to hide this huge part of her life from them; it wasn't right, it just wasn't. She felt like she was betraying them and betraying Midir; she was in love with him and she couldn't even admit that to her closest friends.
"What am I going to do?" She thought to herself desperately, "what can I do?"
Maybe if she explained to her friends, if she explained how he was trying so hard to change and how she felt about him maybe they would understand, maybe they'd accept him.
Stella and Hayden were chatting beside her oblivious to her predicament. It was only when she heard Stella say Midir's name that she began to pay attention to what they were saying.
"He's been here over a week and he hasn't done anything," Hayden said, "maybe Truth was right; maybe he has reformed. People can change."
Emma felt relief and hope creep in to her maybe they would understand, maybe they could all be friends.
Then Stella grimaced, "Yeah sure, the leopard has changed his spots. People like Midir Boyce don't change," she said bitterly, "they can't. He's probably just lulling us into a false sense of security or maybe he's spying, trying to find out what the person he's after knows."
Stella's words ate into Emma and stripped away the tiny spark of hope she had just felt. Maybe Stella was right, maybe Midir had seen too much of the dark side to change. She suddenly felt even more confused than she had earlier, she wasn't sure of anything anymore. That which she had been sure of, namely Midir, suddenly didn't seem so clear anymore. She got off the bus feeling twice as bad as she had when she got on.
Midir was running, running with all the speed and power he had. He ran through the fields in long loping strides crushing the grass beneath his feet. He ran as only a vampire could, not caring who saw, caring only about getting to Emma.
He hadn't heard exactly what her friends had said to her but he had sensed her reaction. He had felt what she felt, whatever they had said was making her question him and question their connection. It was even making her question herself and her love for him. He didn't want her feeling like that, he would make things right, whatever it took he'd make things right.
"Midir," Emma said and he could hear the surprise in her voice.
She looked extremely pale and tired and her blue eyes looked sad and almost lifeless.
"Emma are you okay? On the bus I," he paused to work out how to put it, "I felt what you were feeling. How upset you were."
Emma sighed deeply and leaned against the doorframe, "Midir I just got home. I'm not sure I'm up to this right now. I'm tired and I'm not even sure how I feel."
Midir placed a hand on her shoulder and gave her a tiny smile.
"Whatever you want Em. I can stay or go; we don't have to talk about what's going on. We don't have to talk."
Emma shook her head and grinned, then punched him lightly on the shoulder.
"Is that all you ever think about?" she asked.
"Yup," he replied with a smile, "Hey at least I made you smile."
"What are we going to do?" Emma asked seriously.
Midir ran a hand through his thick, dark brown hair, a pensive look on his face.
"Do you still feel the same way about me? Do you still want to be with me or did whatever Stella said change that?" he asked. "What did she say by the way?"
Emma looked at him with apprehension in her eyes. It was clear she didn't want to tell him exactly what Stella had said and even clearer that she believed it a little.
"She said "People like Midir Boyce don't change"."
"And you believe that? You believe I can't change?"
Emma watched Midir as she tried to answer his question. He was looking at her so openly with his emotions showing clearly on his face; she wondered did he know how vulnerable he looked right then. Vulnerable and innocent, that was how he looked, Midir Boyce vampire assassin was looking at her with raw need in his eyes, with pure emotion on his face, he looked like a little boy, a little lost child looking for solace, she had never loved him more.
"I don't know," she replied softly feeling a need to be gently with him. "Maybe you've seen to much of the dark side to change, I don't know. All I know is that I'm sick of this; I'm sick of being torn between you and them. I'm sick of listening to you say one thing and believing it until they say something that makes me question you. I'm sick of lying to them and I'm sick of having to hide how I feel about you. I love you; I want to be able to tell my friends that. I want to be able to talk to you in front of other people, to sit beside you on the bus. I don't want to have to choose between you and them."
Midir could feel Emma's confused emotions as the words tumbled out. She was sad and angry and she felt cheated, cheated of a life where she could have love and her friends. He didn't know what to say to her; he couldn't say everything would be all right because he wasn't sure it would. He couldn't say her friends would understand because he was pretty sure they wouldn't, all he knew was that he loved her and wanted to be with her and that he would do anything for her.
Emma smiled sweetly at him when he told her this.
"I know," she replied, "I feel the same but it doesn't fix anything. I'm still lying to my friends. I'm still hiding how I feel about you."
"Then lets tell them," he suggested.
"Tell them," Emma exclaimed, "Are you crazy? Can you imagine how Stella or Fiachra would react to this? I can and believe me it's not pretty."
"We don't have to tell them all," Midir said slowly, struck by a sudden inspiration. "We could just tell one of them. It would be a start."
Emma smiled brightly; it was a good idea. It wasn't the perfect solution but there didn't seem to be one for this problem and to have one of her friends know, to be able to talk to one of them about what was going on; it would make things a million times better.
"That's great idea," she said.
"So who should it be?" Midir asked.
It should have been a difficult question, which of her friends to share this huge secret with? But it wasn't, she knew even before Midir had asked her. Truth, Truth was the only one she could tell, the only one who might understand.
"Truth," she told Midir, "we should tell Truth."
"Yeah," Midir said softly, "yeah lets do it."
Emma had never felt more relieved in her life than when she and Midir arrived in Truth's yard. At last they were off the road where anyone could have seen them together. Well not together really, Midir had kept a discrete distance from her and walked through the fields a lot of the way.
A small grey kitten wound it's way around Emma's ankles and she could hear the high pitched yip of Truth's Mom's Lhasa Apso coming from inside as well as the deeper barks of the German Shepherd beside the door. Emma had always envied Truth the collection of animals that populated her family's farm.
She pressed the doorbell apprehensively wondering how she was going to explain everything to Truth, wondering how Truth would react. She was asking a lot of the girl and she wasn't sure how Truth would take it. Hell if the situation was reversed she wasn't sure how she'd take it. Midir hung back in the shadows, eyeing the large German Shepherd warily as it bristled and growled at him.
Truth's younger sister Charity opened the door. She smiled at Emma and yelled for her sister.
"Truth, Emma's here."
Truth appeared at the door a second later.
"Hey Em," she said and paused obviously waiting for Emma to fill the silence with a reason why she was there.
Emma was stumped; what the hell was she going to say. She was saved from having to say anything by the two dogs. The Lhasa Apso snuck out the door through Truth's legs and joined the German Shepherd in growling at Midir.
"Samson, Brandy. Stop that there's nothing there you silly dogs."
"Actually," Midir corrected stepping from the shadows, "there is."
Truth looked from Emma to Midir and back again, mouth open obviously trying to think of something to say and failing miserably."
"What's going on?" she blurted out eventually. "What's he doing here?"
"He's with me," Emma told her.
"And you lost your mind when?" Truth asked. "Because you know if you can remember where you had it last we can retrace your steps and maybe find it."
"I know this must seem crazy," Emma began.
"Seem crazy?" Truth exclaimed, "running around naked screaming "we've got to save the chickens" might seem crazy, this is positive insanity."
Emma grinned; she couldn't help it, how the hell Truth came up things like that even in the strangest situations was beyond her. She could see Midir biting his lip on a smile too.
"If we come in maybe we can explain," Emma suggested.
"Unless it involves being hit on the head by a large, hard object I'm not sure I'll believe it but lets hear it anyway."
She moved out of the doorway to let them in and as Midir stepped over the threshold she said, "I cannot believe I'm letting a killer vampire into my house. If Emma wasn't with you I'd have let the dogs eat you."
"Hmm, Pedigree Lamia. I think we could corner the market on dog food," Midir shot back.
Emma saw Truth's lips twitch a little and thought that maybe this wouldn't be as hard as she thought.
"Mercy and Charity are in the kitchen," Truth told them, "so we should go to the sitting room, I guess."
"Where's Faith?" Emma asked as they walked down the hall.
"She's helping Mom and Dad feed the cattle. Why?"
"Wait a minute, "Midir said with a look of more than slight amusement, "you've got three sisters and they're called Faith, Mercy and Charity and you're Truth."
"Yeah. You find something funny with that? My name amuses you? What is it a clown here for your amusement?" Truth replied in a serious voice.
Midir smiled and Truth couldn't help but grin back.
"I thought insanity wasn't contagious," she sighed throwing herself into an armchair.
"There certainly seems to be an epidemic of it going around Glenalta, starting with whoever named you and your sisters," Midir replied.
"Why does everyone question my father's mental health? First Fiachra, now you, there is nothing wrong with my name or the girls' names. And you buster, whatever's going on I'm sure you need to be on my good side and you're not getting off to a good start."
Emma sat on the sofa beside Midir listening to the banter that passed between him and Truth. A smile spread over her face, they were getting along, sure they were swapping insults but it was in a friendly way, she was already feeling a hell of a lot better about things.
"So," Truth said, "what's going on? What's he doing here? Besides insulting me and my parents that is."
Emma took a deep breath, " Okay I don't know how to say this so I'm just going to blurt it out. Midir is my soulmate."
Emma kept her eyes on Truth's face trying to gage her reaction. So many different emotions that ran over her face it was almost comical.
"Oh Emma that's great. No wait that's terrible, no it's great. Oh crap," she exclaimed throwing her hands in the air.
Emma couldn't help but laugh at Truth's reaction even though she felt like crying. Truth laughed too and hurried over to give her friend a hug.
"So which is it?" Truth asked, "How do you feel about it?"
"It's good," Emma told her.
"I'm glad," Truth replied hugging her again. "How about you?" she asked Midir, "How do you feel about it?"
Midir thought about it for a minute then smiled, "I feel happy, it's alarming how happy I feel."
"He's got your sense of humour," Truth told Emma.
"My sense of humour," Emma exclaimed, "It's more like yours."
"Is not," Truth replied.
"Is too," Emma answered back and both girls began to giggle.
Midir looked at them as if they'd both just hopped on a table beginning to do the hula while singing YMCA.
"Women," he said eventually.
"Just when I was beginning to like him, he goes and says something like that," Truth said. "Oh God, what about the others?" she asked, "Do they know?"
Emma shook her head; "You're the only one we've told."
"Oh God," Truth said again, "how the hell are they going to react?"
Emma sighed, "I don't know; I've been worrying about that too. I felt so guilty about hiding this from everyone; I hated lying to all you guys that's why we told you."
"What to draw me into the deceit? So I'd have to lie too?" Truth snapped angrily.
Truth saw Emma's stricken face and felt terrible.
"I'm sorry Em, that was mean. I'm sorry. I didn't mean it, not really. It's been a lot to take in; it's confusing. I mean Midir you seem like a nice guy, funny and Emma obviously cares about you. Not exactly."
"The psycho killer your friends made me out to be," Midir finished for her.
Truth nodded.
"Well I never was crazy," Midir told her, "But I did kill."
"Truth I know this is a lot to take in and if you don't want to be friends with me anymore," Emma began wearily.
"What?" Truth interrupted loudly, "Emma we'll always be friends; that's not even a question. I'm just worried about the others reactions."
Emma felt relief flood through her, "You mean that?"
"Of course," Truth replied, "now do you guys have a plan for telling the others?"