Quiet Hill (Part 4)

Once the girl in blue had disappeared, Harry decided that there was nothing left for him at the lighthouse. He wondered if he could make it to the carnival before Cybil went on the water slide without him. Outside the lighthouse, Harry was once again teleported. This time, he found himself on the bridge of the boat.

Harry: Cybil? Where is everyone? Oh, wait, that's right. We never agreed to meet here. What am I thinking?

Harry continued towards the amusement park. In order to reach it, he would once again have to go through the sewers. He descended the ladder and began running through the sewers again.

Elsewhere, Cybil hadn't made it very far. In fact, Harry had almost caught up with her. As she peeked around the corner, something attacked her, sending a stream of blood into the air.

Harry continued through the sewers. Near the end, he encountered what looked like teddy bears with sharp claws. Although Harry wanted to go up and hug them, he decided that it would probably waste too much time, and Cybil would go on the tunnel of love all by herself and be sad.

When Harry emerged from the sewers, he was already at the park. Walking around by the entrance was a small black ghost that would squeak every time Harry came near it.

Harry: Eww, get it away.

Harry reached into his pocket for something to throw at it, and found the bottle with the red liquid. He threw it on the ghost and everything went crazy. Fortunately the game was being played on a PS2, so it didn't lock up. Stretched out versions of the characters flew past the screen as Cybil moaned and groaned. We're trying to keep this story PG-13, so maybe it's a good thing that we couldn't see what was going on.

Cybil: Harry, why did they take your daughter?

Harry: How should I know? I still don't even know who THEY are. To tell the truth, Cheryl isn't my real daughter. The real Cheryl died three years ago. I didn't want my wife to find out, so I went out to find a girl that looked just like Cheryl that I could pass off as her. The pet shop said they didn't carry little girls, so I had to look elsewhere. I found the new Cheryl just outside of this town. My wife never even knew the difference.

Cybil: Harry, that's awful.

Harry: Yeah, but what else can you do?

As Harry talked, the girl in blue appeared again. Harry walked over to confront her.

Harry: I knew you'd show up here. It was foretold by gyromancy. Wait, where have I heard that before? Are you Alessa?

The girl nodded.

Harry: Do you know where my daughter Cheryl is? She actually looks a lot like you. You could pass for sisters. Wanna come live with us?

The girl shook her head and used her powers to throw Harry backwards. Suddenly, Dahlia Galespie ran in.

Dahlia: Harry, I found the Flauros. Here, catch.

She threw the item to Harry, and it caught him square in the forehead, knocking him out.

While he was unconscious, Harry missed many interesting revelation. Dahlia revealed herself to be Alessa's mother. She was also the third gunman on the grassy knoll, and the person responsible for the creation of the boy band. She was truly evil. After she had a few laughs, she activated the Flauros and made everything go crazy.

Harry awoke in the hospital again. Lisa had a weird twitch in her eye, either that or she was winking at Harry.

Harry: Oh great. Now I'm gonna have to go through those sewers and do all that other stuff again.

Lisa: So Harry, where's my pizza?

Harry: Damn. I knew I forgot something.

Lisa: It's okay. I'm not hungry anymore. I couldn't get what you said earlier out of my head. So I went down to the basement, even though I was scared as hell.

Harry: No, hell doesn't get scared, it gives scared.

Lisa: I couldn't help feeling that I had been there before.

Harry: You liar! You told me you had never been down there before.

Lisa: But what I found was...

Harry: Relax. You're probably still in shock from being knocked unconscious.

Lisa: No, Harry, you were the one who was knocked out.

Harry: Oh, that's right. Well, maybe you're just loosing your mind.

Lisa: Screw you. I'm outta here.

Harry: I'll call you.

Harry was left alone in the room. Suddenly, the silence was pierced by a loud rumbling noise.

Harry: I gotta get something to eat.

Harry looked around the room, and found a notebook sitting on the desk. By reading the notebook, Harry learned that he was in a place called Nowhere.

Now, let's see how many times I can say nowhere.

With nowhere else to go, Harry exited the room. He found himself on a path that lead to an elevator. The elevator seemed to hover in the middle of nowhere, with nothing to hold it up. The doors of the elevator opened, and a voice came over the speakers.

Voice: Harry Mason, please report to the downstairs area at this time.

Harry: I'm being summoned. What happened in this town? I have a feeling that If I take this elevator down, I'll find out. At least I hope I will, because there's not much time left in this game.

When the doors opened, Harry found himself back in the evil hospital. Out of nowhere, a transparent vision of Alessa began to run down the hall. Harry tried to catch it, and ended up knocking it down.

Alessa: Ow, watch it you big jerk.

The ghost suddenly disappeared into nowhere. Harry really didn't know where to go next, so he tried some of the doors. Most of them were locked, and some just lead to nowhere. Finally, Harry found one that was opened.

The room looked like one found in the school. There was a single desk sitting in the middle of the room, and there were more desks nowhere else in the room. The desk had many things carved into it such as:

Mrs. Tiller is a whore

Midwich sucks

Alessa was here

So this desk belonged Alessa. The room lead to nowhere else of interest, so Harry decided to leave.

Back in the hall, Harry found another door had opened. This one lead to another hallway in the hospital. As he entered the room, Harry looked down at his shoes. No wear and tear on them, they were in excellent condition.

One door in this hall had a coded lock on it, so Harry turned his attention to it. The password was nowhere to be found, so Harry just punched random buttons until he got it. It turned out that the password was Alert, and this set off the fire alarm. Harry ducked into the room as the sprinklers came on.

Inside the room was Lisa.

Lisa: Harry, I understand now. All this time I thought I was the only one, but I'm not. I'm the same as them.

Harry: What the hell are you talking about?

Lisa: Help me Harry, please.

Lisa stumbled towards Harry. Not having very much experience with girls in a while, he panicked and pushed her away.

Harry: Eww, girl cooties.

Lisa ran into the wall and hit her head. Blood began to pour out of the wound. Out of nowhere, sad music had begun to play in the room. Harry looked down to discover that the music originated from his radio. He quickly changed the station to something else.

Girls: Give it to me baby.

Guy: Uh hu, uh hu. And all the girlies say I'm pretty fly for a white guy.

Harry: Hey, they must be singing about me.

Lisa stood up and began to walk towards Harry again. Harry backed away and ran out the door, slamming it shut behind him. Lisa pounded on the door.

Lisa: Harry, let me out. There's a rat in here with me.

Harry: No way. You'll get blood on my clothes.

There was a strange sound, and the pounding ceased. Harry decided to explore. When he entered the room, Lisa was nowhere to be seen. A book lay on the floor. Upon closer examination, Harry learned that it was Lisa's diary. It was a sad account, mostly because of the poor grammar and lack of punctuation. Being a writer himself, Harry began to cry over the poor use of the English language.

Harry exited the room, and returned to the original hallway. Out of nowhere, the demon children from the school returned. The only difference was that they were now transparent.

Child: Hey mister, we broke our ball. Get us another one, or we'll break you next.

The children backed Harry into a corner.

Harry: That's it. I've had enough of you guys pushing me around. Feel the wrath of my foot.

Harry pulled his foot back, and nailed the first one square in the head. Wait a minute, you mean he actually managed to hit something? Wow! That's amazing. This is absolutely spectacular. It's about damn time.

Aware of his newfound weapon, Harry sent the second child flying down the hall. The third one tried to run away, but was no match for Harry's long reach. With the three terrors immobilized, Harry was free to explore once again. But there was nowhere else he hadn't explored that he could get into. Suddenly, he heard the door behind him unlock. The door lead to the elevators once again. Harry feared that it would go nowhere, but he was able to take it up to the second floor.

As he walked down the blackened corridor, Harry continued to kick monsters and to sing.

Harry: When there's something, strange in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? Harry Mason.

Inside one of the rooms, Harry found a VCR, and he once again tried his video tape. The tape showed Lisa sitting in the examination room.

Harry: Damn, doesn't that girl ever leave that room.

Lisa: Okay, hello. My name is Lisa Garland, and I think that I would be perfect for the part of Mary Jane Watson in the upcoming Spider Man movie. I have many credits to my name, including a number of horror films, and a walk on part on Star Trek: The Next Generation. If you are interested, contact me at my home any time from five to eight in the evenings at 214-867-5309.

Harry left the tape and returned to the hallway. In the next room he found a camera.

Harry: Good. Now I can get a picture of Dahlia and send it into Fangoria magazine. They'll pay a fortune.

With nowhere else to explore on the second floor, Harry returned to the elevator and took it up to the third floor. The doors opened, and Harry found himself in a kitchen. It really got him nowhere, because the only thing in the entire room was a large refrigerator. As he walked by the refrigerator, something on the inside pounded on the doors. Curious as to what was making the noise, Harry looked inside. When the doors were opened, creatures began to pour out. There were large plant like things, a few lumps of slime, and something that looked like it had once been a chicken.

Chicken: Thanks, man. We've been in there for a long time. I guess they just forgot about us.

Harry: Uh.........sure.........no problem.

Chicken: So, did they ever lift the prohibition on alcohol? I could sure go for a drink.

Without answering, Harry turned and walked back into the elevator.

Back in the hall on the first floor, the final door had been unlocked. Good thing too, because there was nowhere else to go. It lead to yet another hallway, with many doors lining the sides. Most were locked, but a few were opened. Through the first door, Harry found himself in a room covered with graffiti with sayings like:

Cheeko

Kebby J 4 Ever

Eat at Bubba's

In the corner, crying under a desk, was the ghost of Alessa.

Harry: What's wrong? Why are you crying?

Alessa: I just herd that New Kids on the Block are breaking up.

Harry: Oh, so these must be Alessa's memories.

The ghost vanished into nowhere, and Harry was left alone. He continued to explore the other rooms until he came across one with a hospital bed in it. Out of nowhere, four ghostly figures appeared before Harry. He recognized two of them as Kaufmann and Dahlia. One of them looked like one of the demon doctors from the evil hospital, and the last one sounded like Marlon Brando in the Godfather.

Doctor: So then it's settled.

Godfather: Yes. Everything will be ready soon.

The ghost of Dahlia spoke on the phone.

Dahlia: So, we're going to go with two large pepperoni and sausage pizzas, and throw in a bottle of Pepsi. Hold on a second. He wants to know if we want breadsticks with our order.

Kaufmann: Do they come with dipping sauce?

Dahlia: Do we get dipping sauce? Yes.

Kaufmann: Go for it.

Dahlia: Have it here in twenty minutes, or we'll kill you.

Doctor: Now that that's settled, on to business.

Godfather: Oh, yeah. What are we going to do about the girl?

Dahlia: We'll set her on fire, then use a magic spell to get the rest of the power.

Godfather: What good will setting her on fire do?

Dahlia: I don't know, but it sounds like fun.

Doctor: Cool.

Kaufmann: Next line of business, something has to be done about these Pogs that kids keep spending their money on.

Godfather: Yeah, they're really stupid. We have to put a stop to them.

The figures vanished just as easily as they had appeared.

Harry walked across the hall, and entered the final room he hadn't been in. His investigation was going nowhere. It was a little girl's room. There were dresses hung in the closet, and drawings all over the floor. Harry picked some of them up and looked at them. There was one of the giant lizard shaking hads with Mamoth, and another of one of the winged demons at an ice-cream stand.

Harry: Talk about a demented childhood. No wonder she kept trying to kill us in our sleep when we first got her.

Harry walked through the door at the other end of the room. He had come to the end of nowhere. Used it twenty four times, not bad. On the other side of the door, Harry found himself in the place called Somewhere. Before his eyes, the ghost of Dahlia returned. She was talking to someone inside another room.

Dahlia: Alessa, sweetie, please come downstairs and eat your vegetables.

Alessa: No. I won't do it. You eat them.

Dahlia: But how can you hope to get big and strong if you don't eat them?

Alessa: I'm eating chocolate for dinner, so ha ha.

Dahlia: That's not good for you.

Alessa: Screw you. I'll eat whatever I damn well please.

Dahlia: I really wish you wouldn't talk to me like that. I am your mother.

Alessa: Kiss my ass, bitch.

The ghosts disappeared, and Harry examined his surroundings. He was now in a room he had never been inside before. There was a staircase leading down, which lead Harry to conclude that he was on the fifth floor. Why he chose that number I don't know, so don't ask.

Harry: Wait a minute. I've seen this place before. It was in Psycho. This is exactly what the top floor of the house in that movie looked like. That must be it. Dahlia is really Kaufmann dressed up as a woman. I knew nobody could be that ugly.

Harry ran down the stairs to confront his enemies. At the bottom, he found Dahlia, Alessa, Cybil, and a person wrapped in bandages.

Dahlia: So I told her "If you want it gift wrapped that bad, you can do it your damn self." That's why I no longer work at Wal-Mart.

Cybil: Freeze.

Dahlia: Sorry, I didn't notice you there. Otherwise I would have done this earlier.

Dahlia used her powers to throw Cybil onto the ground.

Harry: Dahlia! What the hell is going on here? Where's Cheryl?

Dahlia: What are you talking about? She's right in front of you.

Harry: Oh, I get it. Alessa is Cheryl's real name. So who's that in the bandages.

Dahlia: This is Lord Imhotep from the movie "The Mummy". He's here to help with the ceremony.

With that, there was a blinding light, and Alessa and Imhotep were combined into an angelic young girl.

Harry: No more games. I know your little secret, Kaufmann.

Kaufmann: What secret is that?

Kaufmann walked in behind Harry, carrying something in his hand.

Harry: Well, so much for my theory.

Kaufmann: What are you doing? I thought you were going to wait for me.

Dahlia: Well, if you hadn't taken all damn day to get here I would have.

Kaufmann: Yeah, well do you know what this is?

He held up the bottle of the red liquid.

Dahlia: Karo syrup and food coloring?

Kaufmann: We'll see about that.

Kaufmann threw the bottle onto the angel. It exploded on contact and covered the girl in a sticky red substance. She began to scream, and collapsed. Suddenly, a white light shot out of her back and a large winged beast emerged.

Kaufmann: Wait. That's not supposed to happen.

Dahlia: Sucker.

The demon took to the air, and lightning bolts rained on Dahlia.

Dahlia: Hahahahaha. Wait, that's not the right reaction. Wait, now I remember. Ahhhhhhhhh. The pain is unbearable.

Dahlia died, and the creature turned it's attention to Harry.

Harry: Oh great. How do you expect me to kick that high.

Harry was struck with lightning and collapsed.

Cybil: Guess it's up to us to save the world.

Kaufmann: Looks that way, doesn't it.

The two began to fire into the monster.

Cybil: So what exactly were you guys trying to do?

Kaufmann: We were trying to bring back Elvis, but things took a wrong turn.

Cybil: I'll say.

Within seconds it was dead. As it fell to the ground, the world around started to collapse.

Cybil: We are so screwed.

Kaufmann: Tell me about it.

Harry: What the hell? I leave you guys alone for one minute, and you bring about the end of the world.

The creature melted away, and Alessa was left behind. Harry ran up to her.

Harry: Hey, uh, sorry about the whole not telling you the truth and almost getting you killed thing.

Alessa: Don't worry about it.

Alessa reached behind her, and handed Harry a newborn baby.

Alessa: Try not to kill this one, okay.

Harry: I'll try but... oops.

Harry dropped the baby on the ground and quickly scooped it back up.

Alessa: I'll open a portal. You guys just get out of here.

As the three ran for the opening, a strange silver liquid started to come up through the metal grating. Slowly, it formed itself into human form.

Cybil: No, not a T-1000.

The T-1000 changed it's shape, and took on the appearance of Lisa.

Harry: So that's how she escaped from that room.

Lisa ran up and grabbed Kaufmann around the neck.

Lisa: Come on, Kaufmann. I need some of that good stuff.

Kaufmann: Not until you pay me the money you already owe me, you lousy deadbeat.

Lisa: You know I'm good for it. Let's go to my place and discuss it.

Kaufmann: Nooooo.

Lisa pulled Kaufmann down through the grating with her.

Harry: They should be very happy together.

Cybil and Harry ran as fast as they could. Just as they were about to run through the door, a pile of flaming debris came crashing down on them.

Alessa: Oops, sorry. Guess I was a little late on that one.

Alessa lifted the debris of the two and they continued. They made it out just as the doorway closed.

After a few seconds, Cybil stopped running.

Cybil: Harry, you can stop now. We got away.

Harry: That's what they want you to think. Keep running.

It took about ten minutes for Cybil to convince Harry to stop. When he finally did, the two were on the edge of a graveyard. Harry looked down at the baby, and Cybil played with it.

Cybil: Got your nose.

Harry grabbed Cybil's badge.

Harry: How do you like having things stolen from you?

Kaufmann and Lisa decided to give up their lives of drugs, and now speak at schools and charity events about the dangers of addiction.

Alessa survived the incident through some stroke of luck. She is scheduled to be one of the contestants on the next season of Survivor.

Dahlia Galespie is still dead. At least, we all hope she is.

Cybil Bennet soon rose to the ranks of chief of police, then was busted down to meter maid after she was caught taking bribes, and had posed for pictures in Playboy.

Harry's new daughter, Meryl, would eventually go on to help Harry's brother-in-law Roy Campbell and Solid Snake to defeat the terrorists at Shadow Moses.

As for Harry, he made a fortune writing about things he saw during his adventure. "Happy Lizard Meets Mr. Mamoth" has been one of the best selling children's books for three months now. His next book, "Chirpy's Day at the Ice Cream Stand" is scheduled to be out this summer.

And finally, Samael was resurrected in 4127 AD, and began a war with humanity that would last for fifteen years. But that is another story.