NOTE: I have been reading TOO MANY Happy Noodle Boy quotes…
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One day, Zell was reading a newspaper with an "Interesting" topic in it.
"Hay Squall! Did you know that some moldy cheeses could cause abnormal side effects? Like insanity!"
"Whatever, Zell! I'm eating cheese from three weeks ago and I'm not going psycho!"
[Squall pops moldy cheese into his mouth]
(The Next Morning)
Rinoa came staggering into the room.
"Umm…. Can you help me?"
(Squall is grabbing her leg)
"Whats wrong?" asked Zell.
"I dunno… I woke up and he was just… there."
"I AM THE CHEESE GOD! Nobody can stop me from washing your bed sheets! Buzz! Meow! Woof! I am the Zany master of the chocobo dung! Hear my SQUEAL! YEEEEK!!!!!! Squeeze my nub!"
[Squall flies out the third story window]
Squall is flying in the sky and in the sea in a car under a hill and over a rock, and in space.
"WHOOO! I'M FLYING! Sporks are EVIL! SATAN POSSESSES THEM! Hear my fart of triumph! In the future, Crisco will taste like vanilla icing, and bacon fat will make you loose weight!!!"
[A little boy looks up into the crystal blue sky.]
"LOOK MAMA! A weird man is yelling at people!"
"Yes, son, you is right."
"PEANUTS! PEANUTS! Jell-O is mouse brains! Mentos shall rule all! EAT RECTAL MEAT FROM CHOCOBOS! They are made from my toenails! Meat is actually purple! I am Daron! The subway mascot! EAT OUR SANWICHES! THEY ARE MADE FROM HUMAN WASTE!
[Squall starts to fall] [Squall hits the ground]
"YIPPEE! THAT OUCH! Come my filthy stink men! I am the mighty dictator that shall rule all earwax! Run little prune! Be free! Trees are planning to get their revenge! Count Chocula shall help the trees defeat the humans! So will Frankenburry AND Booburry! OH GOD! MY HAIR HAS LICE!"
[Rinoa tries to stop Squall with her Blaster Edge]
"Take that Squall! You are coming home with me and your friends!" she said.
"THOU SHALT NOT INSULT THE PIG WITH FOOLISH JESTURES!!! The Martians are coming! STOCK UP ON CANNED GOODS!! THE END IS NEAR!"
[Irvine shoots a tranquilizer up Squalls ass]
"Fuck the king of swine! I shall avenge thee!"
"I'm glad that's over…" Rinoa sighed.
[Rinoa drags Squall back to the apartment by his nose]
"Zell, throw that nasty cheese away. I NEVER want this to happen again."
"Yes ma'am."
The End?
NO! Its not the end!
Zell goes nutz! But never leaves the house… Rinoa chained him to the bed to prevent "It" from happening twice.
"I must go to find the crystal hot dog! Come my bloody fuckmonkeys! Sniff the shit covered spoon and lead me to the DOG! SPOOT! BzzT!! Meow! Woof! PPT! Gimme more cheese! You are hiding it! I know it! Prepare all bladders for decrease! Nyuk nyuk nyuk! WOOWPWOWPEP!!"
Zell never recovered.
The END! FOR REAL!